The Boy in the Park
by Shadenight123
Summary: Naruko Uzumaki found a boy in the Park who didn't immediately spurn her. From there nothing changes, yet everything does. Proof that an OC doesn't need to be powerful or even a Shinobi to make a difference...and proof that I can write something different from Angst. Fem-Naruto. Oc.
1. Meeting

The boy in the park

Blue eyes and blond locks looked at him. He ignored them.

The gaze was insistent, even as he slowly turned the page of his book. There was a mild breeze, and in the midst of June a cool wind was all he needed —rather than staying at home and hear the incessant nagging of his mother.

So what if he couldn't mould chakra? He could still be a normal civilian, like most of the Konoha population.

Those blue eyes kept their gaze fixed on him. He began to sweat. He finally took a deep breath, and moved his eyes —red— to lock with them. The child couldn't be more than five years old.

Her hair tied in twin ponytails, she looked just like the poster child of 'childhood kid playing in the park'. She had one of those horrifying sunflower dresses you make kid wear when you want to show them off with the 'isn't she cute!' exclamation.

"What'cha doing?" she asked him with a chirpy and high-pitched voice.

"Reading," he replied. He flipped another page, without really reading it all. He skimmed over it —since the girl was still looking at him.

"Why?" she asked once more, putting her index finger in her mouth and biting on her nails —was she chewing on them?

"Why not?" he coolly answered, gazing around the park for whomever the child's mother or father was. He wasn't good with kids. He was caustic, most of the time. The few times he wasn't caustic, he was abrasive. When he wasn't abrasive, he was extremely happy to be left alone or in peace. He had enough to contend with at home, with his younger sister being able to use chakra and all.

The girl seemed to think for a moment, before her blue eyes —cerulean was it? They looked like the sky anyway— stared at him once more with amusement.

"Cuz it's boring! That's why!" she brought her tiny hands to clasp against the side of his jacket. "Play with me?" she asked then.

He looked at the sky for a moment, where the sun was dangling in peace and letting its scorching rays fall against the heads of the imbeciles who thought that running or playing with a ball in this heat was a smart thing to do. They'd all get a heatstroke, and he'd laugh on their tombs.

The mental image made him smirk.

"No," he replied to the girl. "I prefer reading," he then settled his back against the bench and returned to his book. The girl didn't disturb him afterwards for a while. He imagined she had gone off to play with the other kids, or something like that.

He slowly brought down his book from his face, being naturally curious to this slight change to his otherwise boring routine. He snorted and returned to his book a moment later. The girl was playing soccer with a few of the kids, laughing and screaming with them.

He had gone by five chapters, by the time he heard a ragged breathing near him once more.

"Hey!" he lowered his book and looked, raising an eyebrow at the sight of a sweaty and muddied girl. Her blond ponytails looked scraggly, as if someone had pulled them repeatedly. He knew that because his favourite pastime was to pull his own sister's hair after all.

"Hello?" he hazarded back.

"You're not gonna go yet?" she asked him, a smile still on her face.

He looked up at the sky. "There's still light," he answered. The less time he spent home, the less he had to deal with the constant rebukes to boot.

"You're still reading that!?" she made a frowning face, her nose moving in disgust. "What's it talk 'bout?"

"Gardening," he said. He had stopped reading shinobi adventure books —he'd never be one of them. The most he could aspire to become would be a Samurai, and a Samurai in a shinobi village? Who was he kidding…he'd be a grocer or a baker, maybe if he was lucky he'd own a stall at the market or something.

He wasn't even a girl, so being 'married off' wasn't in his list.

"Garden…ing?"

"Flowers," he settled for a simpler answer.

"You're strange," the girl crossed her eyes together. "Reading 'bout flowers in the park: there's flowers everywhere!"

The way she was mangling the language in such a natural way slightly irked him, but not more than the usual. She still spoke slightly better than his sister, who was far more obnoxious because yes, she could mould chakra and he couldn't.

It was the hot topic of the day in his house, and it _stung_.

"Want to look for them with me?" she asked once more, her eyes filled with hope.

"No," he replied. "I prefer reading." He sighed and returned to the book.

There was a moment of blissful silence, as he heard the girl scamper off. A few minutes later —at least, what he believed where a few minutes later— she returned. She hesitated, and then she heard her speak.

"Can I read with ya?"

He slowly lowered the book from his face and looked around. There really was no-one else in the park by then. He sighed. He admitted to himself he didn't really want to waste time running around kicking a ball or stuff like that —sweating? Out of the question— but he wasn't an arsehole.

He brought the book down open on his right knee, giving the girl space to sit next to him on the bench. She quickly scampered on his left leg —perched on it rather, as if it was the most normal thing in the world to do— and then looked up at him expectantly.

It was like having a dog on your lap, only the dog had a pair of giant blue eyes and blond locks of hair, and was looking at you with the sort of excitement and expectation you could expect from a starving puppy finding food in front of him.

Slowly, he brought his left arm around the other side of the girl's body, and holding the book with both hands, he cleared his throat.

"Chapter twelve: of the Chrysanthemum family and its proprieties…"

And that was how Naruko Uzumaki, age five, met for the first time a completely normal teen. It was the start of a friendship that would change nothing, and at the same time, would change everything.


	2. Talking

The boy in the park

Chapter Two

"Really, you could at least try! Your uncle needs an accountant, and…"

"I'm off!" he was out with another book. He didn't want to be an accountant. He didn't want to be a stall vendor or a grocer. He couldn't stand the prideful or smug looks of people he had grown with —who could mould chakra while he couldn't. Or the fact that those who could not —the ones like him— already had their cliques in which a glass-wearing reader wasn't needed.

He lived for his habits. He lived for the monotony of repeating the same action, repeatedly, without the risk of it changing the outcome. Sure, he knew this couldn't last, and he knew he was wishing for time to stop on its tracks, but he could still live his life the way he wanted to, couldn't he?

Konoha was going through an economic crisis, and finding work was hard…but so what? Did his mother think he was doing nothing? He was reading. He wanted to become something better. He wanted to become a writer.

Like Jiraiya of the sannin, who had penned down quite a string of novels —which he secretly read from his father's 'secret' stash hidden in the basement.

He sat down at his usual bench in the park, and once more, he opened his book to read with the light of the sun. The children were playing as usual, but that didn't trouble him at all. He slowly flipped the pages, calmly letting his mind wander to the vivid description of the accounts of a survivalist walking in the wilds. The man was describing how he had crossed a lake with the use of thin but wide wood panels which kept him afloat, and as he narrated of how he had battled a shark —in a lake, mind you— he heard a sound.

He stopped reading as he actually did hear a sound.

It was the sound of a girl crying.

He carefully placed the book down on his lap and looked at the source of the noise. The blond haired girl with ponytails of the day before was there, and she was apparently trying to wipe away her tears. The kids had resumed playing soccer, but judging by the scrapes, which she had on her arms —a few red— it wasn't difficult to think someone had pushed her down on the ground.

He frowned but did not move. Her parents were probably going to intervene or something like another parent coming to ask her where it hurt would happen.

Nobody came. He felt slightly confused. Maybe the mothers around hadn't heard her cry?

He resumed reading still slightly confused —and quite a bit guilty— when he heard the familiar footsteps of the girl walking and stopping near him. Her eyes were still red and puffy as he watched her look at him.

"Hey! Want to play with me, mistah?" she asked, trying to smile and hold on to it with all the effort she could muster. The way she had said 'mistah' instead of mister mentally made him gag. Was no one teaching her Japanese around here?

"I prefer reading," he deadpanned again. Then, probably due to the guilt, which he still felt for not having intervened earlier, he bit down on his lips and lowered his book. "Are you all right?" he asked softly. So what if he had a glare that could level a mountain? A crying kid was a crying kid, and he had a soft heart for crying girls —he blamed his sister for that.

"Yeah!" she nodded quickly —maybe a bit too fast. "It's nothing ta worry 'bout! I just fell, 'ttebayo!"

"If you say so," he remarked. There was a moment of silence, as the girl seemed to fidget for a moment. He mentally decided to take some band-aids with him the next day, and some disinfectant —especially judging how much the girl seemed to like muddying herself.

"C-Can we read again, mistah?"

He shrugged and made room for her on the bench. He didn't know what it meant, that sparkling look in her eyes as she once more decided to sit on his lap, but he knew there was just a cold chilly feeling settling on his back at it went by.

He knew that gaze. It was the same his sister had that time he promised he'd play with her once.

He had ended up playing for seven consecutive hours, because he had promised to.

He cleared his voice, and began to narrate. The girl interrupted a few minutes later, when she loudly exclaimed.

"But that's stupid! Why does he hav'ta use a staff? Can't he use a cool jutsu?"

"That would defeat the point of the story," he replied slowly.

"What's da point? It's here right? This little dot here is a point, yes?" as she said that, she touched with her index finger a small dot on the paper —that was a full stop. "How does he defeat that?" she asked, scrunching her face perplexed.

"No," he sighed. "It's not like that," he added, trying to come up with an easy way to explain it. "Think…think about…" he exhaled. "A story says something, okay?"

She frowned. "But it doesn't speak!"

"Yes, it doesn't," he nodded, "But…it's written, and we read it, yes?"

The girl seemed perplexed, but slowly gave a tiny nod of her own as she bit her lips in an effort to remain concentrated. "So when we read it, it's like…the book is saying something to us, right?"

She widened her eyes, "Ya mean…like when I think something, and I hear a voice saying what I think in my head, becuz it's my voice and…and all that?"

"Yes," he smiled briefly. It wasn't difficult to explain things then! So it was just his sister who was a moron —that was good to know for the future.

"Wow," the girl muttered. "Ya know a lot of things mistah!" she smiled. "But how does it defeat the point?"

"That's a…saying," he said then, "a way to say something with other words, like…it's not literally 'defeating' a point. It's more of… going against the purpose of what you intend to do."

"Eh?"

"Counterproductive?" he hazarded.

"What's that? Is it food?"

He dropped his head down and sighed. "No," he chuckled. "It's…going left to go right," he said then.

"That's stupid!" she exclaimed affronted. "Why would you go left," she showed her right arm, "To go right?" she showed her left one. "Stupid!"

"Yes," he snickered. He couldn't help it. "That's what it means."

"Ah…so it would be stupid!" she smiled brightly as she concluded by herself. "If he used Jutsu, he'd be stupid!"

"Well, yes, because he is showing how to survive without using chakra."

"But that's dumb," she said slowly. "Who'd ever be without chakra? Duh, everyone has it!"

"Yes," he said then bitterly, "But not everyone can mould it," he commented.

"Mould it?"

"Chakra is the life-force of living beings," he said through gritted teeth. He still remembered his lessons before the test to see if he actually could become a shinobi. "Everyone has it, but it then needs to be moulded to become something like a technique. If you can't mould it, you can't be a shinobi."

"That sucks," she said. There was yet another moment of silence, before she finally exclaimed. "You must be a powerful shinobi, right!?"

There, the dagger piercing his heart was there.

"Can you teach me some cool technique, mistah!?"

"No," he ground out. He would have stood, but the girl was sitting on his lap and it made it difficult to go through —he wasn't still keen on letting the girl fall on the ground again, but he was starting to regret coming to the park.

"Why not!?" the girl exclaimed. She huffed and puffed her cheeks out.

"Because I can't mould chakra," he remarked calmly. He slowly lifted the girl —she didn't even weight much— and dropped her next to him. Then he stood and left.

That was how the second meeting between him and Naruko Uzumaki went.


	3. Forgiving

The boy in the park

Chapter Three

He returned to the park three days later. His mood was no longer sour, and he actually felt guilty. Really, she was just a kid. She couldn't have known. He sighed as he held another book to cover his face. He was actually stewing on possible ways to say he was sorry —then again, a teenager saying he was sorry to a five years old kid sounded extreme. Weren't 'adults' supposed to never be wrong?

Then again, he rather preferred spending time in the park rather than at home. He slipped into his world filled with ink words, when he heard the slight scraping of feet near his bench once more.

He lowered his book and looked at the girl —she was wearing the same sunflower dress he had seen on her last time— who was trying to apparently gather the courage to say something to him.

"I—" she hesitated and turned her gaze sideways, before crossing her arms together. "I'm sorry?"

He shook his head, and just as the girl's shoulders slumped down as if defeated, he replied.

"I'm the one who should be sorry," he said as he closed the book he was reading —leaving behind a footnote. "You want to play?" he asked then. Well, he supposed he could play with her if she—

The girl yanked him up from the bench with her hands that clasped firmly on his arm, making him yelp from the sudden way she literally hauled him halfway through the park and towards the swings. "Can ya push'me on the swings please? Cuz it sucks when there's no one and—" in the midst of the blabbering —excited blabbering— he understood she wanted to be pushed on the swing.

He was actually relieved.

The swings were actually free, and as the girl excitedly sat down on one with a bright smile on her face, he slowly moved behind her.

"Come on mistah! Push hard!"

He started slowly. First, he had to get the momentum right, and secondly, he had to be careful of where the 'return force' would end. The girl laughed happily, as she swung in the air and then back down, her hands clasping tightly onto the chains of the swing. "Faster!"

Her laughter was nice. It was a sort of giggle mixed with a high-pitched harmonic sound that resounded clearly in the park. He actually felt embarrassed at having eyes trailed on him —far more eyes than he would have liked. He didn't like being looked at.

"Mister! Faster! I want to spin around it!" she screamed at him as she dangled her legs up and down to try to help with the momentum. He wasn't actually going to help her on that. He'd push her, but to make the swing spin was hazardous —and the last time he had tried that with his sister as a lab rat, his mother had been pretty harsh with him.

"That's dangerous," he said, his voice barely more than a whisper as he felt his cheek flush. What was he doing there? Moreover, why were people looking at him? They weren't thinking he was a paedophile now, were they? He was just doing a kind action, really. He wasn't a paedophile. He liked women with hips and curves…not scrawny tomboyish kids! He actually began to slow down the swing, much to the girl's chagrin.

He didn't even know her name to begin with. Clearly, that was a clear sign he wasn't a paedophile, right?

"Hey! You're slowing down!" she accused him, narrowing her blue eyes on him. "It's not fun! I want to spin around the top!"

"That's dangerous," he repeated calmly as he stopped the swing by holding on the chains. "You'd hurt yourself."

"But it's fun!" she pouted. "Please? Pretty please?"

"No," he remarked. And he didn't count on his ability to actually push her with enough strength to make a complete turn round the wooden axis.

She kicked the ground and pouted, crossing her arms over her chest. "Party pooper."

"Proud of it," he dryly said as he walked to return to his bench, book in hand.

The girl followed him like a duckling, her eyes staring at him as he sat down on the bench. Just as he was about to bring the book up once more to read, the girl jumped on his lap. "So! What do we read today mistah?"

He exhaled shaking his head slowly, before tapping at the title of the book.

"Can't you read?"

She stilled —which was strange, because she never was _still_ when on his lap. She dangled her legs, bounced around, sometimes she even dropped her head back but she never stood completely still like a block of ice.

"Of course I can, 'ttebayo!" she said out loudly, before grabbing the book and moving the cover in front of her face. The image of the cover showed a man holding on to a pair of paintbrushes while it painted on canvas natural scenery.

"H-How to…" she scrunched her face in curiosity. "How to paint! Yeah."

"The correct art of perspective in naturalism and arts throughout the years," he deadpanned. The girl squirmed on his knees.

"Yeah! I was going to say that 'ttebayo."

He chuckled and slowly opened the book, letting his finger rest on the first symbol of the page.

"The," he began, "Naturalism," he moved his finger to the second set of symbols. "Movement," he continued like that, amused and quietly chuckling to himself as the girl appeared now vividly interest. He wondered why his sister couldn't be as easy to pacify as this girl of whom he didn't know the name.

He blinked.

"Hey," he asked slowly. "What's your name?"

She blinked. She looked at him for a moment, before a smile settled on her face.

"I'm Naruko Uzumaki! And I'm going to be Hokage someday, believe it!"

He smiled briefly. "If that's your dream," who was he to tell her it was impossible? The next Hokage would probably be one of the sannin, just like all those before had been chosen from the team of the Hokage before them.

"Mistah, what's your name eh!"

"Me?" He blinked. "I'm…" he shrugged, and said his name.

And that was how they exchanged names for the first time, properly meeting.


	4. Eating

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Four

"I'm going to become a ninja!" Naruko boasted regularly, "And then I'll be a Hokage, so everyone will recognize me!" she added always without missing a beat. He just flipped through another page of his book, and watched her scamper around the park convincing children to play with her.

She was anything but one who surrenders. Even when someone said no to her, she insisted up to the point where the other kids ended up complying and played with her —until their parents came to take the relative child away. She would always huff then, stalk a bit around and then move to the bench, where she'd sit next to him.

He'd then pick a book from inside his jacket and hand it over to the girl.

Every now and then, she'd ask for the meaning of a word, and he would give it to her.

That tranquillity and repetitive lifestyle could not last, but then again, he wasn't worried about continuing it during the winter —he didn't consider this a summer escapade, and homework was something he had always done with ease during the winter times.

The way people gazed at him as he walked down the street was somewhat starting to worry him, but it probably just was him jumping at shadows. The normalcy of the day —him reading and Naruko sitting with her legs dangling next to her— came to a halt when the girl exclaimed, now at the age of six and half.

"Hey! You know, I found a nice place to eat! They sell Ramen! Have you ever had Ramen? It's really good!" she seemed to look sideways for a moment, and then turned to gaze at him once more. "Want to go eat some?"

He looked at the time. He could theoretically consider it an afternoon snack. He had money in his wallet, and he had begun to dub the puppy eyes of Naruko as some sort of strange mind-controlling technique that worked on him.

"All right," he sighed closing his book.

"Yes!" Naruko laughed as she fist-pumped in the air, making a small dance, "You're the best, Aniki!"

"I'm not offering," he remarked dryly. Her shoulders dropped down visibly.

"Damn."

"Language," he chided her.

"Not even a bowl?" Naruko pleaded him with bright eyes, her hands clasped together in prayer and a look that could probably convince a murderer to repent.

"One, if it costs little," he said. His allowance had been zero since he had entered middle school.

Immediately relieved, Naruko jumped ahead of him and began to excitedly start to dictate the wonders of ramen. "It's warm broth that seems like soup and the noodles are like, you know, they taste like the soup and so it's like eating and drinking soup and it's warm, so…" as she blabbered on, he absent-mindedly nodded. They passed through a couple of familiar streets, until in the end they reached the stall in question.

Ichiraku Ramen.

He had never been there before, which made him slightly uncomfortable. He needed his habits: they were the reason he was still sane and alive in this world of lunatics that spouted words like 'soccer' and 'sports'. Calmly, he schooled his feature and entered the stall, moving aside the flap and sitting down on the stool while making a stiff nod to the owner. Next to him, Naruko took a seat with a happy and bright smile.

"Ojii-san!" she exclaimed out loud making him nearly jump on his seat from her chirpiness. "A bowl of Miso for me!"

He blinked as he looked back at the menu standing on the chalkboard sign behind the counter. Miso was the cheapest they had. He actually was thankful for that.

"I'll have the same," he replied.

The 'Ojii-san' just smiled and gave a hearty chuckle, before moving to prepare the food. There was a moment of embarrassing silence, which soon died anyway because with Naruko silence simply couldn't survive.

"So, Aniki! I went to the academy yesterday!" he raised an eyebrow as he looked at her, before taking out from his pocket his usual book. "And you know? There's this mass of idiots! They always yell about 'Sasuke-kun' or something! Just because he's an Uchiwa or…"

"I think you mean Uchiha," he replied calmly. "The police clan, you know? The one with the fan symbol?"

"Yeah, them! And he struts around like some sort of sore duck!" she grumbled. "And they forced me to sit next to him too! Argh! I hate him!" she mumbled.

"You can't change seats?" he asked.

"No," she muttered. "Iruka-sensei doesn't like me much," she shook her head and smiled. "But I showed them! I got a can of paint and I placed it above the door, so when he entered it fell on his head and he was orange! It was awesome 'ttebayo!"

"Naruko," he said hesitantly, "Are you sure he doesn't like you _because_ you prank him?"

"Nah," she firmly replied, "He always looks at me: they all do! It's really strange cuz, you know…"

"Because," he corrected her.

"Because," Naruko rolled her eyes, "Because nearly everyone does and…"

She bit her lip. "Do you know why they do it, Aniki? You're like, smart and you know things!"

He shook his head. "No," he said. "I'm sorry." He didn't know. He _knew_, but technically, he _wasn't supposed to know_. He had been barely seven when the Kyuubi had attacked. They didn't think he'd remember the name of the girl that 'trapped' the nine tails. In truth, he actually hadn't until she had finally told him her name and after that…well, he had always been a coward at heart: it would be a greater effort to try and distance himself from her than not.

"Uff," Naruko huffed and pouted, before her mood rose again. "Never mind then! I'll ask Hokage-Jiji then!"

"Hokage-Jiji?" he said incredulously. "Naruko…no, I don't want to know," he added then, settling his nose back on his book. What he didn't know couldn't hurt him —that much, he had already claimed as truth.

"Yeah, the old man! He comes by and visits me!" here she seemed to frown, "Right! You don't know where I live, Aniki!"

His eyebrows raised both at the same time.

"Well, I don't…"

"I'll show you after we eat!" she happily chirped, just as the steaming bowls of Miso ramen dropped in front of them. He unclasped his chopstick and exhaled once, before saying calmly.

"Itadakimasu."

Somehow, he missed the slightly shining gaze of Naruko as he said that, who then smiled even brighter than before as she dug in on her own ramen.

Teuchi just watched in silence from behind his counter. He didn't know what to make of it, but then again if the Hokage hadn't intervened, then the boy was probably 'safe'.

That was the first time Naruko Uzumaki and the Boy from the park shared a meal, but it wouldn't be the last.


	5. Brawling

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Five

Naruko Uzumaki now liked the academy. She had disliked history just as she had disliked writing. She truly had taken a hatred of anything with the word 'theory' in it and whatnot, but that day, they had begun brawling time. Sure, it was called generally 'Physical Training' but to her? It was free-for-all brawling.

She liked it. She could hit people without repercussions.

Her Aniki was there at the park when she arrived with a slightly broken lip and a few scrapes on her cheeks —Sakura had clawed her hard rather than just fall down, and she had pulled her hair too!

Her Aniki gave her a glance, and then he frowned slightly. She fidgeted under the gaze of his red eyes, as he closed his book —this time it was one on architecture— and gestured for her to come closer.

She sat down next to him, looking as he rummaged through the inner pocket of his jacket that he always carried around. A small green bottle with a pungent smell came out, and now it was her turn to frown and whine.

"What's that, Aniki?" she pouted as he simply looked at her, and then told her to stay still. She obeyed because her Aniki never said something more than he needed to —she didn't know how he managed to make stand still, not even Iruka-sensei could!

"Did you fight against someone?" he asked her, sighing as he slowly shook his head. "You should know better."

"We had brawling lessons!" Naruko exclaimed happily. "I fought against Sakura!" she puffed her chest out, as if it was some sort of badge of pride. He stilled for just a second, before applying the cotton swab over her wounds. "Ehi, it burns!" she yelled at him, trying to move her face back.

"Stay still," he remarked. "Here," the next moment he slapped a Band-Aid near her chin, where one of the biggest scratches was. Naruko looked slightly shocked, if the fact she gingerly moved both fingers of her hand to the Band-Aid were of any indication. The 'indication' was also that she had some sort of half-demented grin on her face that didn't appear to leave her even as he resumed reading and had already handed over to her a book.

"Aniki?" she said softly from his side.

"Uh?"

"Thanks," her head then dropped against his shoulder, as she began to flip through the pages of the book using his side as her back support.

The next day, he actually received a summoning from the Hokage.

The summoning came as he was walking towards school, in the chilly morning of October Ninth. He had no idea what it was about, but he was more than actually scared shitless.

An Anbu had accosted him as he had been walking and had simply told him the Hokage wanted to speak with him. When you live in a military dictatorship, as one of the 'worker' bees…and you get summoned by the Queen…you have to worry.

Still, as he entered the Hokage tower for the first time in his life, he couldn't help but wonder what it was all about. The only thing he could think about was if he had somewhat done something wrong to some clan person —which was preposterous, because the middle school he went to was on the other side of Konoha.

It didn't take much to understand there really could be only one reason for it. As he was nearly pushed in the office of the Hokage, the last thing he expected was to be left alone face to face with the strongest shinobi in the world —that's what the book said about the 'Kami' of shinobi.

He swallowed nervously.

"Ah, so we finally meet," the Hokage smiled with a pipe in his mouth. He didn't look dangerous —not with the large white fabric and the bright red hat…but he was afraid all the same. "No need to be afraid," the man added then. "Do take a seat."

He stumbled forward, more than simply walk, and he sat down on the offered chair as if it was an anchor of safety rather than just a cheap wooden piece of furniture.

"So, you're the Aniki I keep on hearing about from Naruko-chan, right?" he made a small smile. He could probably crack his body in half in less than a second with the same finger he was lighting his pipe with —yes, he was lighting his pipe with his finger for Kami's sake!

"I suppose so?" he replied carefully, fidgeting on his seat.

"It's good that Naruko made a friend," the Sandaime spoke calmly, making a knowing nod. "Very good, I had lost hope…but I am a bit worried," he slowly took out a folder. A thick manila folder practically filled to the brim with photos and papers. "There is nothing that shows a common point," he remarked. "How did you two meet?"

He was interrogated on _that_?

He exhaled in relief. "I was at the park, reading." He began calmly, "Naruko asked me if I wanted to play, and I said no," he shrugged. "I think I said that I preferred reading, and then we began to read together."

"Only that?"

"Yes?" he blinked. "Was there…supposed to be something else?"

"What is your impression of her?" the Sandaime asked quietly.

"She's a loud kid," he shrugged. "Sort-of like my sister, but she's got a better head on her shoulders…" he smiled briefly, "She's also a quick learner."

"Oh?" Hiruzen raised an eyebrow at that. "And why would you say that?"

"I taught her how to read," he explained, "the complicated bits and whatnot. She learned fast."

"Ah, yes," the Sandaime nodded once. "I do not know if you realized it, but Naruko is easily impressionable," he began carefully. "At that age, all kids are. A wrong word or a wrong sentence, and she could easily become something different from day to night," he looked at him curiously. "Do you know about her particular circumstances?"

He frowned. "What?"

"Nothing," the Sandaime was a natural. "Maybe it is better this way. She trusts you 'Aniki'," the old shinobi made a small grin, "And I hope her trust isn't misplaced," he carefully added. "Tomorrow, would you be free for an afternoon snack at Ichiraku's?"

He frowned at the sudden change of argument. He nodded after a moment, "Sure."

"Oh," the Sandaime chuckled then, "I'm glad," he added.

"What for?" suddenly, he felt as if he had been forgetting an important piece of information.

"You also do not use honorifics when referring to myself," the Sandaime's bright smile nearly blinded him —albeit he could give the fault to his fright of the old shinobi. "Just like Naruko, it's endearing I suppose."

"Ah…ah…" he stammered out, "Hokage-sama…I…Actually…I…"

The Sandaime chuckled aloud. "You may go. Tomorrow at four, do not be late."

He nodded and hastily he was up and about, before repeatedly bowing towards the old shinobi as he left as fast as he could.

The raucous snorts of the Sandaime still echoed in his head as he hurriedly left the Hokage tower and headed towards his school —he'd be late, he just knew it.

Little did he know that being late would be the least of his problems, in the years to come.


	6. Partying

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Six

His mother nagged at him for being disrespectful —not going to the cemetery on the day his grandparents died. He didn't care. He was out before she could comment. It was the Tenth of October, and in the afternoon, he had better things to do then dress in black and go mourn on a tombstone.

He had a box in his hand, closed and with a nice red ribbon on it. He was particularly proud of the ribbon: it looked like a mixture of red knots and whatnot, but he had given it a ribbon-like form.

Ichiraku Ramen wasn't bustling with activities, and as he entered the stall he was surprised to be the first one there. The owner looked at him for a moment, before smiling. "They're in the back, upstairs," he said.

He nervously nodded before walking through the stall's backdoor and towards the stairs —the stall had the upper floor converted to living space after all. He knocked on the door trying to put up a nervous smile.

The door opened slightly, and then closed once more.

He could actually hear a female voice exclaiming.

"There's a Yakuza at the door!"

What? Where? He looked around and frowned. He had no tattoos, he was wearing his usual clothes —maybe a bit darker than normal— and he clearly was not sporting a weapon.

"That's got to be Aniki!" the exclaiming done from Naruko actually told him he hadn't been wrong on the door to tap —albeit there was only one.

The door sprung open again, and Naruko was there with a bright smile on her face and her eyes shining brightly, especially when she saw the box in his hands. "Aniki!" she grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him inside. "You came!"

"Y-Yes," he said nervously, as he was literally brought in the entranceway of a normal-looking apartment —albeit one above a ramen stall. The smell of ramen hung in the air, but it wasn't a bad smell at all. There was a cheap wood table with a cake sitting on it, and as his gaze moved around he saw who had done the 'Yakuza!' exclamation.

She was two years younger than he was, with round puffy cheeks and a half-scared look. He raised an eyebrow.

"N-Naruko-chan! He's…is he Yakuza?" she mumbled to the younger girl's ear. The twelve years old girl had brown hair and dark eyes, and she was wearing a simple white yukata.

"Nah! Aniki's Aniki! He's…" she frowned for a moment.

"A student in middle school," he replied as he offered his own name to the girl, who made a light bow as she embarrassedly looked away.

A small gift was already unwrapped in a corner, and judging by the pair of red ribbons that Naruko now sported for her ponytails, he had no doubts on what the gift could have been.

"Happy birthday, Naruko," he said then slowly as he handed over his own gift to the girl. Her eyes widened as she grabbed the heavy box, which outright ended up falling on the ground as the seven years old girl —recently made— looked ecstatic at it.

"Oh! Oh! What is it Aniki? Kunai? Shurikens? We're starting on kunai soon at the academy you know?" she began to fight against the knots, until she finally surrendered to her curiosity and bit the ribbons off like some sort of feral animal. Ayame giggled at the display, while he just brought up an eyebrow.

As the lid fell off the box, there was a moment of silence.

A neat stack of books was inside, all speaking of shinobi adventures of this sort or the other —all books he had stopped reading since discovering it would be useless to fantasize about it. It was half a dozen of them —albeit he had far more at home, but he had picked up his favourites to begin with.

Naruko carefully opened the first book —Tales of the Utterly Gutsy Kunoichi— and read the dedication on the first page.

_Good luck on being a Kunoichi, Naruko-chan!_

It was extremely sappy. He refused to admit he had written that, but then again a note of sorts had to be written on gifts, right?

The next moment Naruko began to cry.

"W-What? Hey! Come on," he said perplexed. "You don't like—"

"No!" she exclaimed suddenly, jumping on the box as if they were precious gold bars. "I like them, Aniki! I like them very much!" she babbled quickly.

He sighed in relief, before slowly letting his right hand fall on the girl's head —to pat it. She frowned for a bit as she dried off the tears, before chuckling nervously. Naruko's whiskered face looked up at him expectantly for a moment more, her eyes still shining from the glittering tears.

"Thanks," she whispered.

"Aw…" Ayame said. "It's so cute," she giggled. "Neh, Onii-san," the girl said looking at him. Wait, since when was he an Onii-san now?

Not even his sister called him onii-san. He was sort-of the 'stupid brother'.

"Y-yes?"

"She's purring," Ayame giggled as she pointed at Naruko, who was actually purring from being patted on the head. He blinked once, and then he chuckled.

A few hours later —which passed playing cards and table games, and 'Teuchi' joined them afterwards. The Hokage himself arrived at dinnertime, and the cake that had been on the table since then was finally unwrapped from its box. It had seven candles, all a sparkling pink. The chocolate writing on it looked placed later as the words 'happy birthday' and 'Naruko' looked penned by a different hand.

"Well, Naruko-chan," the Hokage said then with a dry chuckle. "Make a wish."

Naruko's cheeks filled with air as she inhaled, before blowing out the candles when she exhaled. As the plumes of smoke rose, and the party girl received the first cut of the cake, the Hokage laughed lightly. "Well, what did you wish for Naruko-chan?"

"I can't say that!" Naruko said with her cheeks slightly rosy, "Or it won't come true Jiji!"

"Ah," the Sandaime shook his head with a grin on his face. "I see, well…I hope you like my gift instead," as he said that, he took out a similar box to that he had used for his books. Naruko excitedly opened it, and then made a small 'aw' sound.

"THANKS JIJI, YOU'RE THE BEST!" she tackled the old man, as he gave just a sideway glance into the box. There was a pair of goggles. He exhaled in relief. Had it been a kunai, he would have probably taken a few steps backwards just in case. Really…who hands over a kunai to a child?

Right, the Academy…but then again they did that once they knew they shouldn't toy with them.

As laughter filled the air that would be the first birthday the boy in the park had together with Naruko Uzumaki…but it certainly wouldn't be the last.


	7. Schooling

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seven

Naruko was nine, and he was sixteen and in high school. Time sure did fly, if he remembered how the young five years old girl was when they first met. He flipped through the pages of a book on history, when the girl came running down past him while laughing.

"Catch me if you can!" she yelled to a chuunin —Iruka Umino— who was apparently trying to get her to come to class. The academy's courses lasted all the way in the afternoon after all —and Naruko really didn't like to remain past lunch time.

One tiny part of him actually thought she was doing it for his sake, coming over to the park in the afternoon to read. The truth was probably that she disliked the classes held by Mizuki-sensei. There was a small giggle behind him, as he just sighed and dropped the book on his lap. Naruko jumped from behind the bench directly in his lap, before bringing his book back up, to hide her face.

The chuunin passed by them again while going in the opposite direction, all the while screaming.

"Narukoooo!"

As the chuunin left, Naruko sighed in relief.

"That was close, thanks Aniki!" she said brightly.

"You shouldn't be skipping school," he deadpanned to her. "What did you miss?" he sighed as he slowly shook his head.

"Stupid theory! I mean, the leaf is stupid because it doesn't stick, and all they do is tell me to use more chakra and…"

"Ah," he remarked. "Can't help you on that," he exhaled.

"Yeah, and Iruka-sensei wanted me to remain there to practice more today! But I didn't want to, really! Why is he always nagging at me? He wasn't like that before…"

Naruko mumbled as she slowly settled in his lap, her eyes moving to the book. "Aniki? Is there something you want?"

"Uh? Why do you ask?" he queried back. She seemed to fidget some more on his lap, her ponytails in her hands as she seemed to be moving the ends of them one against the other.

"B-Because yeah! You helped me out!"

"There's nothing I need," he replied with a light shrug. "So, how's your homework going?"

"Ah, yes…" she fidgeted a bit more before nervously chuckling. "It's all right, really," she looked around. "I can do it really well."

"Oh, really?" he remarked. "I heard something different from the Hokage," the fact the Hokage had summoned him —once more bringing him near a heart attack— to actually ask him to investigate on it…he shuddered. Why were people suspecting that he was the most direct link to Naruko? Couldn't they ask Ayame? They were practically sisters!

Naruko's mood soured. "It's not my fault anything I write is wrong! When I write something right, they say I'm cheating! And when I have questions they never answer me or say it's too stupid! I mean…didn't Hashirama ever have to go to the bathroom?"

He sweatdropped before exhaling in relief.

"I see," he nodded. That stopped the incoming rant from Naruko.

"Really?" she whispered.

"Really," he said back. "So…what questions do you have?"

"Things like…chakra, I mean…It's in us, right? So why can some mould it and others can't?" her voice lowered itself considerably as she spoke, her eyes downcast. "And more but I can't recall them…"

"Ah…" he ruffled the girl's hair, earning a startled yelp of surprise form the kid. "Worrywart."

"Aniki!" she whined pitifully. "That's not true!"

"Well, how about you write down your questions? I'll try and find the answers for them then, but I expect a good mark on your next test." Naruko's eyes widened like saucers.

"Really, Aniki?"

"Yes," he rolled his eyes. "Really. Just write your questions down, and I'll go through them." His mother had retired from the shinobi business, so technically he could ask her… Not that he'd actually do it. They barely even talked now, but her old books? Oh, he was sure they were somewhere around the house.

"You're the best!" she hugged him tightly after that, as he simply kept his hand on her head to pat her —she really sounded like a cat when he did that.

"NARUKO!" he nearly jumped off the bench when he heard the scream of the Chuunin in question. He looked into the face of Iruka Umino for the first time, and widened his eyes as he saw the scarred man close to him.

"Ah! Aniki help me!" Naruko grabbed on to his neck just as Iruka tried to pry her off.

"Naruko! Let go! I'm sorry sir," the man said to him as he was actually holding his arms against the bench to avoid being flung around like a ragdoll. "Come on Naruko! Let go of the mister! You can't act spoiled!"

"Anikiiiii!" Naruko had waterfall tears down her face as the Chuunin in question carried her away. He chuckled nervously and waved goodbye to Naruko, before returning to his reading. He knew that in two or three hours the girl would be back —maybe four or five depending on her punishment.

He smiled to himself as he turned another page. He closed his book and stood up from the bench, before heading over to Ichiraku —he'd have a snack, just to pass some time.

As he entered the stall, Ayame greeted him with a 'Sempai!'

"Heya," he said with a nod. "Naruko was caught again."

"That girl," Ayame shook her head stifling a giggle. "Miso ramen?"

"Yep," he remarked.

"Neh, Sempai? I have a question for you," Ayame said as she slowly began to stir the broth —she worked in her father's stall in the afternoon after all. "What do you plan on doing after school?"

"Ah," he nervously looked away. "I still don't know," he shrugged. "My mother wanted me to become a shinobi, when it turned out I couldn't become one she just nagged me to go work for my uncle in accounting. I'll probably decide when I'm older," he sighed. "You?"

"Eh…isn't it obvious?" Ayame said with a light grin. "I'll be a cook just like my dad."

He smiled at her. "Good for you," he replied.

As he began to eat, he actually did think about it.

What, exactly, was he going to do of his future?


	8. Questioning

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Eight

Naruko was looking at him with a curious and hopeful expression, as he began to look at the questions she had written on a scrap of paper. He nodded to the girl, and began to answer her. She smiled and sat down next to him, listening as he explained about Chakra, about why a Kunai had to be thrown from slightly above a target and about things he had read from his mother's books —which his sister wasn't privy to.

By the time he was done, Naruko was slowly looking at the scrap of paper now filled with kanji written by him. "Anything else, Naruko?" he asked as he grabbed his book, ready to open it again.

"No, Aniki!" she exclaimed. "It's everything I wanted! Tomorrow I'm going to ace the test 'ttebayo!"

He narrowed his eyes. "You have the test tomorrow?"

"Hai!" she answered with a bright smile, the perfect image of 'ignorance is bliss' and 'extreme case of guts'.

"And you aren't studying?" he asked once more to be serious.

She frowned. "Aren't we studying now, Aniki?" she smiled then, making that sort of bright ten-megawatt smile that could blind a man. "We're revising, right?"

He blinked for a second, his mouth hanging slightly open in disbelief. Then he smiled, and nodded. "Yeah, you're right. Silly me," he chuckled.

He mulled it over for a moment, before carefully adding. "You know what you should do? Take a piece of paper and copy the questions of your test and the answers you gave. Then if you bring it to me I'll look into it and see what was wrong and what wasn't."

Naruko nodded vividly. "All right, I'll just do that Aniki!"

She suddenly turned to the side, gazing sideways. "Neh, Aniki, your birthday is coming up right?"

He cocked his head to the side, raising an eyebrow. "Yes, I suppose it is."

"Oh, right," Naruko chuckled nervously. "What would you like as a—"

"I stopped celebrating it since I was eleven," he remarked. "And I stopped receiving gifts at thirteen," he pointed out. He shrugged. "It's not a big deal."

"W-What!? Aniki! Birthday parties are a big deal 'ttebayo!" Naruko exclaimed. "You have to celebrate it!"

"No," he shook his head. "Birthdays are for kids."

Naruko pouted and huffed, inhaling air to puff her cheeks. She seemed to be trembling with 'righteous anger'. Her eyes shone dangerously as she crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm not a kid, and I like birthday parties!"

"Of course," he replied neutrally. "But I don't."

"Aw…I made the effort of asking Hokage-jiji when it was," her shoulders dropped. He closed his eyes for a moment. The girl had asked the Hokage _when_ his birthday was, rather than him? Just how exactly did her brain logic work?

"Why didn't you ask me directly?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise!" she huffed in displeasure. "But then you said you didn't want anything!"

"You didn't _need_ anything," he corrected her.

"Yeah, that!" she grumbled to herself, making a grouchy face. She fidgeted with the hem of her orange jumpsuit —an eyesore to watch, but she had taken a shine to it after the academy had asked all students to come with a change of clothes to do physical classes. She had found it, she had liked it and…she practically slept in that jumpsuit nine times out of ten, at least, probably. He didn't know if she actually slept in it —he hoped not.

"Well then," he mused. "How soon do they correct your homework?"

"By the next day," she replied.

"Good, then…as a birthday gift, I want to see you take a good grade in tomorrow's test," the girl blinked and the suddenly paled.

"Ah…Ah! Aniki! I have to go…water the plants! Yeah, see ya tomorrow!" as Naruko dashed off he chuckled to himself.

"Remember to copy the test!" he waved at her retreating back, as she yelled back at him.

"Will do, Aniki!"

He shook his head and returned to his book.

"That was impressive," a voice —that he generally recognized when it screamed— said, as he rolled his eyes and closed his book —it was a Treaty on Existential Life Crisis.

"Umino-san?" he said hesitantly, looking around. Then again, it was a Chuunin so he was supposed to know how to hide.

The Chuunin appeared from the corner of his view, his arms crossed over his flak jacket. "So the reason Naruko actually was quiet today in class was your idea, mister 'Aniki'?"

"Ah, she was quiet?"

Iruka chuckled. "Not by much, but it showed when she stopped asking question. Are you tutoring her under the Hokage's order?"

"No," he shook his head. "Hokage-sama did ask me to check on her marks, but nothing more," he looked to where the girl had dashed away. "She's a good kid," he remarked. "I can't understand why she gets pitiful marks."

"Mizuki's the one who corrects the tests, I asked him too: he said she tends to go overboard with the answers and doesn't even try and give a correct reply. She writes for the sake of writing and filling the blanks," Iruka said. "He showed me one of her tests once, so I really hope she does better."

"Should you be telling this to me?" he asked then curious, "I mean, I'm not one of her relatives or her guardian."

Iruka shrugged. "For all I know, she keeps on spouting how her Aniki is the coolest Aniki in the world: she even got into a tussle with Sasuke Uchiha once over it."

"I'll have a word with her over it," he blinked. "But didn't the Uchiha…you know…"

"Yeah, unfortunate," Iruka grimaced. "Sasuke's never been the same afterwards. I think he barely tolerates Naruko because she doesn't try to get closer to him."

"Ah…so it's an old thing."

"Well, not really," the Chuunin fidgeted for a moment.

"If you want to sit…" he moved to make room on the bench for the Chuunin, who actually accepted.

"Naruko's sort of a tomboy, and it's difficult to convince her to attend the kunoichi only lessons," Iruka turned his gaze towards him, trying to make a small smile. "In the end, she did manage to avoid them, but whenever it comes to wait in class she immediately starts a fight with someone else."

"She's easily bored," he said slowly. "I suppose she reads books only with me?"

"I don't know about reading books," Iruka said. "There are few Chuunin in the academy, what with our low numbers and probably the low salary…but there's always a scuffle by the time I enter the classroom."

"Naruko isn't one to start fights," he replied. "She's really not the type."

"I'd like to believe that, but…maybe you could talk to her?"

He nodded. "I'll do what I can."

"Good and…thanks, I suppose," the Chuunin stood up. "Are you interested in becoming a teacher?"

He furrowed his brows. "I never thought about that."

"Well, when you finish your schooling give me a call: the academy needs any teachers it can get."

"Isn't it a shinobi-only institute?" he retorted.

"Yeah, but we also teach things like maths and other stuff…you don't need to be a shinobi to explain the history of the elemental countries to a bunch of kids. And if there's one more teacher, then there's one more Chuunin who can take on a ninja arts class."

"I see," he replied. "I'll think about it."

"Good. See you then."

"Goodbye," he replied, and then returned to his book. He chuckled. Him, a teacher? He'd wring the students' necks before they even got to the end of the lesson.


	9. Resulting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Nine

He was starting to get worried.

Naruko was nowhere in sight, and it had been two days since he had last corrected her test. She had even been happy about the positive chances of having received a high mark —really, while her calligraphy left a bit to desire, she hadn't done a horrible job with it.

He was patiently waiting to see what mark she had gotten, but when she didn't come the first day, he supposed something had come up. By the second day, he was actually worried. He slowly stood from the bench and closed his book at the same time, before heading off towards Naruko's apartment.

He reached it after five minutes —climbing the stairs was actually the most difficult part of the ordeal, as she was practically on the last floor of a complex, with her door slightly hidden in a narrow street that went through two buildings.

He knocked on the door once.

When he received no reply, he knocked again.

He frowned, and then crossed his arms over his chest. Where had the girl gone now? If she wasn't at home…he mused it over and then walked away, towards Ichiraku's ramen. Maybe they had seen her there.

Five minutes, and he was once more without a clue on where Naruko could have gone —they hadn't seen her there either. He was starting to lose his hope of finding the girl, when his gaze moved towards the Hokage's faces carved in the stone. He could see the glint of bright orange on top of the head of the fourth. He shuddered as his eyes widened in disbelief.

On one side, he was thankful the girl liked bright orange so much —it made it easier to find her— on the other, he actually hoped that dot on the head of the Yondaime was not Naruko.

Who sane of their mind would sit on the head of one of the Hokage!?

He broke into a run, which didn't last much because he had no training whatsoever. Still, by the time he finally saw the summit of the Hokage monument, he was sweating, panting, and barely holding his muscles together. He slumped down on a nearby bench to catch his breath, keeping an eye on the now far more defined blur of orange that hadn't moved from that position.

Two minutes later, and he finally reached the summit too —albeit on the side where visitors could stay safely.

He coughed once.

The girl didn't turn.

He coughed again.

The girl still ignored him. He took in her slumped shoulders and her hands clasping on something, which meant it probably was a paper of sorts.

"Naruko?" he began hesitantly. The girl froze —not literally, but he saw the hair on the back of her neck rise as she straightened all of a sudden.

Her wide eyes turned around to look at him, her hands still clutching on the paper. She swallowed and then chuckled nervously. "H-Hey, Aniki…how's it going?"

"Could you please move to the solid ground?" he asked her carefully. "You know, someplace where you don't risk slipping and falling down?"

"Ah, all right," she carefully stood up, before walking as if it was the most normal thing in the world away from the fourth's stone head and back on the solid ground behind it. He exhaled a breath he hadn't known he was holding, as he went down on one knee to be at the same level as the girl, his hands clasping around her shoulders.

"What happened?"

She fidgeted. "Well?" he asked once more.

She carefully pushed the slip of paper in his hands, before keeping her gaze downcast. He slowly brought it up and began to read it.

Apparently, the Academy was strict on comma usage.

He frowned for a second as he kept on moving his gaze through the matted red that were the mistakes, slowly but surely feeling something boil down in his chest.

"Naruko?" he said carefully. "Did you ask your teacher about this?"

She looked frightened. Then again, he supposed it was because his glare could reduce a mountain to rubble. At least, he hoped it was that.

She bit her lip and shook her head. "He always says I haf'ta study more," she mumbled, bringing both of her hands together as she fidgeted with her fingers. "I…I'm sorry Aniki, I…"

He patted her on the head. "Listen," he said then carefully. "How about you bring this to the Hokage's attention?"

"Eh?" her eyes widened. "But Jiji never listens when I say…"

"Then…" he sighed, "Let's go then," he added. "I know I have to die of something anyway," he mumbled to himself as he slowly and gently steered Naruko towards going down the path of the monument. "Taking an appointment with the Hokage over a test is just a fine way of dying," he mumbled. "Death by test," he chuckled shaking his head. "What imbecile would make a test with deaths?"

Anko Mitarashi sneezed somewhere, followed by the Kage of the villages.

Getting down from the monument was actually easier —what with not having to run upwards and actually having a sort of ally known as 'gravity'. Reaching the Hokage tower proved easy too: Naruko knew the way, even though she seemed to be fidgeting far more than him.

Well, he was nervous to begin with, but Naruko looked outright pitiful. She did have a sort of hopeful gaze on her face, which made it all the more nerve-wracking for him because if he was actually wrong about…

No, he looked at the answers the girl had given once more. He understood failing the grammar. He understood wanting only the subject, the verb and the complement in a sentence. He didn't understand why the mark had to be so low anyway.

The answers were correct.

He wasn't a shinobi, but he knew the answers were correct.

He just hoped there wasn't some sort of law against a civilian knowing answers to a shinobi-only test.

It wasn't as if he could use any of that knowledge to begin with. He looked at the stairs he had to climb with a defeated sigh —he knew that the next day he was going to pay for it, with his legs' muscles locking and whatnot. Today however was not tomorrow!

The secretary outside the Hokage's office gave a perplexed look at him, and then one at Naruko. She scoffed, but said with an uneasy voice.

"The Hokage is busy, you can't—"

And Naruko was off running inside the office before the woman had a chance to say anything.

He followed behind exclaiming "Naruko!" only to find…

Well, he was positively sure he had seen the Sandaime with an orange covered book in his hands, but then again it was gone in a flicker the next —and really, the Sandaime would never read porn.

"Naruko-chan!" the Sandaime chuckled.

"Hey Jiji!" Naruko smiled brightly. "Aniki wanted to talk with you!"

"Oh, good, I just had a few minutes of free time," the Sandaime looked at the secretary with an arched eyebrow, and the woman left in a hurry with a strained smile.

He swallowed nervously as he stepped forward.

"This…it's Naruko's last test," he gingerly dropped it on the man's desk. The dictator of Konoha's desk. He had dropped a test done by one nine years old on his desk.

He was so dead.

The Sandaime frowned for a moment, before sighing.

"Naruko…taking a zero again? Really…"

"Ehm…read it, please?" he said with a slightly choked voice.

The Sandaime raised an eyebrow, and then did just so.

The Kami of shinobi bit down on his pipe as he read the red corrections to get to the answers. He furrowed his brows for a moment, before slowly looking back at him.

"I think I see where the problem is," he commented. "Well…" he looked towards Naruko, "Indeed, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions," his voice remained friendly, even though there was some sort of twinkle in the old shinobi's eyes that promised murder.

"The overzealous teacher will be corrected on his misgivings, Naruko, don't worry…this test isn't correctly marked. I would say…it warrants a good seven or above."

The change was instantaneous. Her eyes shone brightly and her mouth opened up as she screamed a 'YES!' of joy that made him wince from the sheer volume.

"Can you wait outside for a moment, Naruko?" the Sandaime said then, keeping up the smile.

In that moment, he knew he was going to be murdered. Whom was he kidding? He was a civilian, they were going to murder him. Oh yeah, they'd smile and all…but he was sure they…

Naruko grinned and yelled. "See you outside Aniki!" before leaving and slamming the door to a close hard.

"You did a good job," the Sandaime said then, "I wonder…have you thought about what you're going to do once out of school?"

"I…Ah…not much," he replied nervously. "Maybe…a teacher?"

The Sandaime smiled briefly, as he lit on his pipe. "Good to know," the third Hokage eyed the closed door. "There is something I need to tell you, however…it is important, so that in case…" the Sandaime's voice trailed off, "these things happen again, you'll know why at least…"

And that was how he was told of the Kyuubi jailed within Naruko.

It was also how he unquestionably ended up into events way beyond his comprehension.


	10. Testing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Ten

He was sitting at his usual spot on a bench, with the first breeze of autumn ruffling his hair, when a busty blond haired woman took a seat next to him and grinned widely. He looked at her for a moment, and then returned to his book. She had whisker marks on her face and long ponytails that reached way below her shoulders. Her breasts were ample and she was wearing an orange jumpsuit, which was open from the neck down to the beginning of her breasts —probably to entice men.

He flipped another page.

"Muh…I'm a young and vulnerable woman…" she said sultrily. "Will no one look at me?"

"Naruko?" he said calmly, looking at her for a moment more. The sexy woman pouted, and then she puffed in smoke. He coughed slightly as the smoke dispersed to reveal the twelve years old girl he had the unlucky fortune of being friends with.

She chuckled nervously. "Aniki! You found me," he nodded.

"Of course," he remarked, closing the book. "So? What's the problem now?"

She pouted. "Do I always have to have a problem when I come over to talk!?"

He looked at the park of the academy, where he now worked as an assistant teacher —he apprenticed under Iruka Umino, of all people.

"Do I need to have a problem," he replied. "Have to have just sounds wrong," he remarked.

"Yeah, that one," she huffed. "I can't make the Bunshin work!" she exclaimed. "I know I'm going to fail the exam," she fidgeted grabbing her ponytails with both her hands and keeping her face downcast. "I can do everything else, really! But the stupid Bunshin just doesn't…"

He sighed. "You tried the leaf exercise?"

"Yeah! But it's useless!" she muttered.

"Have you tried anything else?" he queried.

"Uh…like what?" she cocked her head to the side.

He shrugged. "I don't know. What are the causes for failing in doing the bunshin?"

"Too little chakra, little control, and…and something 'bout not concentrating enough," she mumbled. "But I try hard as it is! And the Henge is something I can do really easy!" she pouted, "I even created my own technique against perverts, the Sexy No Jutsu!" she said boisterously as she once more transformed into an adult and 'half-naked' version of herself.

"See?" she cupped her breasts —hidden by thin clouds— "any pervert would…"

He slowly brought back up to his face his own book. "ANIKI!" she pouted as she transformed back. He lowered his book again.

"Yes?"

"You're not helping me," she sighed dejectedly.

"Have you tried asking Umino-sensei? He's a Chuunin after all: he might know what to do."

She shook her head. "He's busy."

A nervous tick mark appeared on his forehead. "Oh, and I'm not?"

"No," she smiled. "You're always there when I'm in trouble, Aniki! You're just the best!" he actually blushed at that, before rolling his eyes.

"Ask Iruka, he'll know what to do," he muttered. "I'll check at home for something on the books anyway. The test is coming soon right?"

"Eh…" she nervously chuckled. "It's tomorrow."

He raised both eyebrows. "You're taking it early?"

"I want to become a strong kunoichi 'ttebayo!" she clenched her right fist, "And then I'll be the first female Hokage, you can believe in it! I'll make Ramen a national food! And everyone will see me and haf'ta recognize me…"

"Will have to," he corrected her, "And I don't want to interrupt your glory dreams…but you will probably fail the exam tomorrow. Many take it when they're thirteen…"

She puffed her cheeks and crossed her arms over her chest. "You'll see Aniki! I'll pass the exam with top marks!"

He nodded with a sigh, "Of course…I have faith in you."

"A-Ah! W-Well," Naruko stammered and stuttered, looking sideways and huffing, "I-If I pas-pass, how 'bout we go and eat at Ichiraku or sum'thing?"

He raised an eyebrow. "If you pass, we'll celebrate at Ichiraku. If you don't, then we'll just have to go to Ichiraku to bring you up in spirits."

Naruko's arms ended up grasping at his neck, as the girl hugged him tightly. "You're the best Aniki!" she screamed in his ears, making him actually wobble as he slowly stood up. "You'll see! I'll be the first in class tomorrow, 'ttebayo!"

And then she left running, as usual.

He exhaled and shook his head, before heading back to 'his' duties. It was sort-of over glorified Janitor work at the moment, with him having to move stuff or tidying up notes of other teachers —and sometimes following Iruka around as he explained this or that thing of the academy to him.

He crossed past a corridor just in time to see two girls bickering one with the other.

"Sasuke-kun loves me, Ino-pig!" the pink-haired girl exclaimed.

"He loves me, forehead-girl!" the other one yelled back.

He carefully brought his book up to his face and moved past the two fighting girls —they weren't his problem at all.

"Onii-sama?" the feminine voice reached the back of his ears as he was already turning for the upper floor, and that question soon drowned with the once more continuous bickering between the two.

The next day, of course, Naruko failed the first Genin exam.

She smiled and scratched the back of her head sheepishly, kicking the ground as she muttered about doing better next time for sure.

He just smiled at her as the academy lessons were over, and then began to walk towards Ichiraku with her in tow.

"Mizuki-sensei wanted me to do the Bunshin," she pouted. "I'll never make it!"

"You have three months before the next early exam," he pointed out. "Or you could wait and study six months and take it with your peers."

She huffed. "No! I want to pass early," she stomped her feet on the ground as she said that.

"Why?" he asked.

"So I'll be one step closer to becoming Hokage, that's why!" she whined.

"Naruko?" he raised an eyebrow perplexed. "Is…Is it really that important?"

"It is," she nodded firmly. "When they'll recognize me, they'll stop looking at you badly."

He frowned. "What are you talking about now?" he looked around perplexed. Sure, there were a few glares, but mostly the people seemed completely indifferent to him. He doubted anyone would have anything to say to him anyway.

"They always say you're Yakuza —you're not, but they don't listen! Just because I call you Aniki! It's unfair," she muttered, kicking a stone out of the path. "Really!"

He chuckled. "That's all?" he remarked, ruffling her hair and holding a smirk on his face.

She glared at him without heat —she had started to detest patting on the head just recently, probably because she was shorter than the rest of her classmates. "It's not funny! They're calling you names!"

"I don't care about others' opinions, Naruko," he replied. "I have my books and my few trusted friends: what more do I need?"

He entered Ichiraku with a pouting Naruko in tow, who shook her head at Ayame's question on having passed the exam. The ramen girl just smiled encouragingly, while Teuchi offered the first bowl on the house. He watched her eat as he began too, before slowly letting the peace and quiet of the afternoon settle in.

Way better than going back home to the cold shoulders of his parents. Apparently, working at the academy wasn't good enough. He could have been rich doing accounting but no, he had to become a civilian teacher at a shinobi school. Thankfully, that would not last for longer —he already had an apartment singled out near his work. He'd just have to pay the first three months in advance, and then he'd settle in.

It was as he was thinking that Naruko's hands clasped on his right arm, beginning to throttle him back and forth. "Neh! Aniki! Please do you think you can help me with the written test? Eh? I'm sure if we study together I'll ace it, 'ttebayo! Please!" her puppy-eye technique in full view, and with Ayame giggling behind the counter, he was actually about to answer with a yes when…

"Naruko!" a female voice suddenly exclaimed, one that he was familiar with... as the ramen stall flaps moved aside to reveal an equally familiar sight —that of his sister— he couldn't help but swallow nervously. "What the hell do you think you're doing!?"

"It's none of _your_ business, _Sakura_!" Naruko snapped back at her. Joy, they really liked each other, huh.

"It's _my_ business if you're harassing _my_ brother!" his sister deadpanned, her hands on her sides and a laboured breath to boot.

He brought a hand to his face.

Peace never lasted for long, did it?


	11. Defending

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Eleven

Naruko's eyes widened like saucers.

He actually could _see_ her thoughts going from watching him to watching her, and then back to him.

"Bull—"

"Naruko, language," he began calmly.

"Aniki!" Naruko whined, "I'm trying to be crass here!"

"Aniki?" Sakura said softly, before suddenly finding her voice again. "Why are you so familiar with my Onii-sama, uh!? Onii-sama!" she yelled then, looking at him, "What are you doing here? Did Naruko force you? You…"

"Enough, Sakura," he sighed. "You should go home, or you'll be late for dinner," he commented.

She bit her lip. "You're…not coming?"

"No."

"I see." The pink haired girl dashed off then. He supposed she had teary eyes. _Maybe_.

He sighed.

And that was when the accusing and incredibly narrow gaze of Naruko settled on his face —actually making him yelp and jump a seat away by the intensity of the stare. It seemed to be doing something like a 'chiii' sound as she stared at him, her cheeks filled with air and reddish from the effort.

"Naruko?"

"Your hair is dark and your eyes are red!" she exclaimed then. "You're not like Sakura at all!"

"Ah…" he chuckled. "I took my grandmother's eyes and my grandfather's hair," he replied hesitantly. The truth was different, but he didn't want to share his troubles with the rest of the world after all —and frankly, a lot of people had it worse than him.

"So…Sakura is your sister?" Naruko asked carefully. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"You never asked?"

Naruko actually thought about it for a moment, before nodding brightly. "Yeah! You're right!"

She then returned to her ramen bowl and for a few seconds, she seemed to have finished her arguments.

Then she exclaimed it loud too.

"_**SAKURA'S YOUR SISTER!?**_ _ANIKI! YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME! REALLY_! I mean…you shouldn't have kept it hidden," she stammered out then, realizing people from the other side of the village actually heard her scream it.

"It's not important," he commented. "Really, let it go."

"Why?" her eyes blinked in confusion as Naruko scrunched her nose to try to think for a reason, "We could study together! Sakura's the first of the class!"

"And have you asked her before?" he remarked quietly.

"No," she shook her head. "She's always yelling at me because I'm closer to Sasuke, that bastard," Naruko snorted.

He ruffled her hair again —she made a high-pitched whine at that, bringing both of her hands up to protect her scalp. "You think she'd actually help you after this outburst of hers?"

"If you talk to her Aniki I'm sure she would!" the fact Naruko was actually convinced of it made her endearing, but it didn't change the fact that the most dialogue he had held with his sister…well, it had been on that precise day with her screaming.

And what could they talk about? With their age difference and what-not…and then again, she was a kunoichi and he was a civilian. He felt enough humiliated talking with his mother —better yet, 'listening to her rant'.

"Your ability to see only the good things in people is wonderful, Naruko," he exhaled. "But it doesn't work like that."

"Why not? It's stupid if it doesn't!"

He chuckled. "Yeah, I know…"

When dinner was done, he paid for the second and third 'consolatory' ramen bowl that Naruko had scarfed. He wondered where the girl burned all that energy to begin with. Then again, she did run around more than any other child he had seen before.

"Neh, Aniki?" Naruko asked as he walked her home —Academy student or not, it was late at night.

"Yes?" his hands went in his pockets as he looked up to the stars shining.

"If…If Sakura doesn't want…me as friend," she muttered, "Will you still be my Aniki?"

"Worrywart," he snorted, "When has Sakura mattered, Naruko? I'd be a piss-poor Aniki if I left my Imouto alone now, wouldn't I?"

The fact the girl didn't reply, but hugged him around his waist made him stop walking for a moment. Her face was pressed against the folds of his shirt, and she didn't seem keen at all about stopping the boa-constrictor worth hug any time soon.

"Hush," he said soothingly, caressing the girl's hair gently. "No crying, it doesn't suit you," he chuckled. "Well?"

Her head trembled just for a bit more, before she wiped away her tears quickly.

"Me? Crying? I'm not crying 'ttebayo! I just…there was something in my eyes, yes!"

"Of course," he replied. He waved her goodbye as he watched her enter her apartment, and then turned on his feet and headed off towards the house he lived in.

The next day, he received a call from the Hokage.

He nearly began to plan his escape from Konoha. Weren't two times enough to meet with the dictator of the ninja village? Did he really have to meet the man a third time, birthday excluded? He knew that birthday were 'safe-days' because he doubted the man would kill him during Naruko's birthdays.

He couldn't exclude this having something to do with Naruko to begin with.

In fact, the moment he stepped in the Hokage's office, he was met with the blond hair of Naruko on one side sitting on a stool —and sporting some nasty gashes on her face— and Sakura on the other side, her hair in disarray. On Sakura's side was his mother, holding her usual normal 'stone-like' face whenever he entered a room.

Well, he swallowed nervously as he stepped closer —naturally moving towards Naruko's side, because really…he couldn't stand the other one.

"Is something the problem, Hokage-sama?" he asked.

"Just you!" his mother spoke. "Filling the head of that brat and…argh, I don't know where I went wrong with you!"

All right, his mother was making a scene in front of the Hokage. Good, he was officially dead.

"Ahem," the Sandaime coughed. "There was a problem at the academy today," he said. "Since Naruko is a ward of the state, it is normally up to a teacher from the academy to take her defence, when I asked her who would be her guardian, she asked for you. Is that fine?"

He nodded, "Of course."

"Y-You!" his mother snapped incredulously.

He remained quiet as the Sandaime nodded.

"There was a…scuffle, today, during the usual fighting practice. Since it was a first offence, the academy sensei was lenient and let it be. Yet the moment he looked away, they began fighting once more. Since such behaviour is unbecoming of upstarting academy students, they were brought here to be admonished."

So a bully at the academy ended up talking to the Hokage? He actually rather understood why shinobi were tough: meeting the big boss early on…

"Clearly, the girl started it: she's a good for nothing prankster," Naruko's hands clenched on her jumpsuit's shorts. "And the fact she asked for _you_ just goes a long way in proving it." His mother added stiffly, "Sakura is a top grade student: she'd never start a scuffle on her own: she clearly was provoked."

He exhaled as he gently dropped his hands on Naruko's shoulders, the trembling girl stilling for a moment. He saw the look of hurt on Sakura's face and that of disgust on his mother, but that didn't stop him from raising an eyebrow.

"Naruko? Can you tell me what happened?" he asked gently, ignoring the pit of nervousness in his stomach. He could defend her if she told the truth and she was innocent, but if she actually admitted having started it…well, he couldn't defend her then.

"Sakura said…she said I couldn't be your sister because we weren't family, and…and that I shouldn't call you Aniki. I…I told her it wasn't true. I told her she could…she could stuff it, but then they separated us and…and I know you don't want me to start any fights Aniki."

"Stop calling him that!" Sakura yelled, making Naruko wince.

He just raised an eyebrow and then turned to Naruko and nodded for her to continue. "So she began to hit me. I just tried pushing her back, really!"

"Who separated them?" he asked then, looking at the Hokage.

"Iruka Umino," the Hokage replied. "He did state Naruko was the one below Sakura, and as you can see…"

There was a clear disparity in the amount of wounds and scraps suffered after all.

"Naruko might be a prankster," he said slowly, looking at his mother. "But she's a good girl at heart, and she never pranks people who don't deserve it. She didn't start the scuffle. I'm sure of it."

"Onii-sama?" Sakura sniffled. "W-Why?"

He looked at his younger sister and replied. "I could ask you the same: why did you do this, Sakura? We never talk at home. It's been years since we last spoke. So why now? You're just jealous, Sakura." He shook his head, "Which is normal for a child I suppose."

"You!" his mother hissed. "Just you wait until…"

"Very well," the Sandaime exhaled slowly. "I hope this will not be repeated. I have far more important business and paperwork to deal with, and Haruno-kun here has work to do at the academy too."

He nodded and then gently pushed Naruko to follow him outside. "Come on," he said as he guided the girl out of there. "We'll have ramen after school is over," he said in a light tone as they left the Hokage tower.

"You shouldn't have done that, Aniki," Naruko muttered. "Won't your family hate you now?" she asked dejectedly as she looked at him with sad eyes. He blinked once, and then grabbed Naruko in a headlock and tousled her hair firmly and as fast as he could.

"EHI! Ehi! Aniki! Wait! Ehi!" she flailed and screamed as he simply kept it up for a while, before letting her go as the girl held on to her scalp while muttering 'ouch' and 'ow'.

"Better now?" he said to the girl who winced as she kept on passing her hands through her hair.

"Aniki!" she pouted, but then smiled. "Last to arrive to Ichiraku pays for the other 'ttebayo!" she exclaimed then, running ahead.

That would be the first time he'd be there defending Naruko from others…but it wouldn't be the last.


	12. Offering

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twelve

"Onii-sama, please come back home," his sister said, her green eyes looking at him worriedly. "Mother's sorry."

He flipped a page of his book, as he looked at Sakura with a half-bored and half-contrite expression. The girl's hands were wringing against themselves, probably in stress.

"No," he replied calmly. "Is there anything else?"

She looked dejected for a moment, but then shook her head and left. It was the fifth consecutive day she had been doing that. It was the fifth day in a row that he had a sour mood.

It wasn't that he 'hated' his sister. It just…it was difficult to understand why she'd now go to such lengths. He flipped through the pages of the work he had to do, and began to calmly write and set down the marks of a first year class.

It was boring work, but if he kept this up by the time Naruko graduated, he'd be already teaching the brats —which meant a pay raise. He had just finished compiling the marks, when Iruka brought Naruko in the teacher's lounge for a scathing tongue-lashing. It was a common sight since the day the girl had found out where _he_ was most of the morning.

While he actually was sort-of touched, it wasn't as if he was going anywhere now, was he?

"Aniki!" Naruko said the moment Iruka stopped to catch his breath, latching on to his chest and pouting visibly. "Iruka-sensei is meaaannnn!" she whined out as she made her Naruko-Trademarked Fake Crocodile Tears. "He hits me!"

"T-That's not true!" Iruka spluttered.

"Muuuh…what if it scars? I'm not going to be a bride then!" she whined once more, showing her completely normal scalp —it was already ruffle-proof after all.

"Naruko," he sighed and patted the girl's head once —that made her go on her usual purring answer. It had to be some sort of innate genetic makeup: if someone patted her head, she reverted to a cat-like behaviour.

"Nyah?" she said between purrs. He rolled his eyes.

"You're not a cat, Naruko. And you have lessons: come on, don't waste Umino-san's time," Naruko pouted. She stretched —just like a cat— looked back with a boring look at Iruka, the type cats give when they go 'Really? Do I, supreme God-Cat, have to go there?' and then snorted softly as if she had decided it was too much trouble getting up.

"And I have work to do," he added also, seeing how she wasn't moving. "If I don't work, I won't be paid, and if I'm not paid, I can't pretty much offer you ramen now, can I?"

Her eyes shone. "We're going to eat ramen after school?"

"No," he sighed. It was far too pricy to do so daily, now that he also had rent to contend with. "But if you graduate, I'll offer you all the ramen you can eat at Ichiraku."

He knew he was condemning himself to poverty. He just knew.

He hoped Teuchi would offer the first bowl on the house…and the second, the third and maybe all the way up to the fifth.

The girl pouted, but jumped off his lap. "I'll show you Aniki! I'm going to ace this test this time, 'ttebayo!"

Considering she had failed the second one and was now going for her third try, he just smiled. "All right, I'll believe you," he winked at her, as she left— not before screaming to the top of her lungs.

"Come Iruka-sensei! We're distracting Aniki from working…and he has to pay ramen!" Iruka stammered a moment more before following the blond bullet out of the teacher lounge. He returned to his assignment instead.

After school, he began to walk towards the market only for Naruko to immediately dash from her spot on the swing to right against him. It was sort of endearing —like having a personal duckling— how the girl just…followed him around.

"Neh, Aniki? Where are we going?" she asked.

"To the market," he replied with a shrug. It wasn't that difficult. He was barely an assistant teacher who had to pay rent: he sustained himself thus on cup ramen and cup-anything and instant coffee and whatnot. He rarely even had to spend more than half of his salary on food —considering the other half went to the rent.

"Oh! That's boring!" Naruko pouted. "Neh, can we train on the Bunshin some more?"

He admired Naruko. Really, she was literally unable to do the Bunshin —and not for lack of trying— but she persisted. He had tried telling her to use more chakra, less chakra, train more with control and the girl had done that and more, and yet nothing seemed to work.

Really, it was as if the Bunshin was literally against her.

"After I buy the groceries," he replied. He sighed. He really needed some free time to just read a book, but he couldn't just leave Naruko alone. The girl had no one else. If he felt lonely, he could always go and chat with a few —admittedly sparse— friends from school, or if he felt masochistic, he could try his mother —his father was actually the only one who didn't care and still waved at him with his carefree attitude. Naruko had him and the people of Ichiraku ramen. If he wasn't there and the Ichiraku folks were working…she was _alone_.

He knew she trained because she had nothing else to do —apparently, it took her but a couple of days to 'devour' through a book, and books were _costly_.

He was actually glad that when he had left, he had brought all of his books with him. He wondered what they had done with his old room: probably converted it into a closet or storage of sorts.

Buying food went by smoothly —after all everything was on sale, the prices were even and the total didn't go beyond the five hundred ryos. You can't _cheat_ on that, no matter how _hard_ you try.

And the machines never lie —especially when they ring you the receipt.

With his plastic bags in hand —with Naruko already taking care of the last two, because she wanted to help— they walked towards his apartment. He hummed along the way as Naruko told him of the daily routine at the academy, with…

"Naruko," he asked suddenly, caught by a flash of insight. "Do you come by every day to check if Sakura convinced me to go back home?"

The girl skipped a step, barely holding on to her balance as she made a 'waah' sound.

"W-What? Nah! Aniki…" she stammered.

He chuckled. "You're really a worrywart, aren't you?"

She pouted and snapped her head to the sides with an 'indignant' look. "That's not true!"

"I'm not going anywhere…how many times will I have to repeat that?"

"B-But she's…" Naruko mumbled a 'your family'.

"I have only one person who calls me Aniki," he replied then softly. "And there is only one person I call Imouto," he added then. "So, who do you think is my family?"

The way her eyes were wide and her face morphed in shock was actually somewhat silly. She was looking with her bright and big cerulean eyes his way, all teary and sparkly, and with her frame slightly trembling.

"Really," he sighed, "What is it with you and believing I'm going to leave any moment soon? Sorry to tell you, but I'm here to stay," to prove the point, he opened the door of his apartment…that was right next to Naruko's. "See? No luggage and no moving out."

The girl entered behind him, as he dropped the bags on the cheap plastic table and turned to give a condescending and half-smiling look to Naruko. "Want to have dinner together, Imouto?"

That was the first time he offered dinner to Naruko…but it truly wouldn't be the last and, in retrospect, maybe his wallet wouldn't have suffered that much if he hadn't.


	13. Worrying

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirteen

Naruko had stolen the scroll of forbidden techniques. Considering she had disappeared during the morning, after failing the exam for the third time, he actually was worried. The fact the Hokage had called for him to investigate meant he was really at his wits' end. He was a civilian, but what did he know of tracking or finding a girl? And for what it mattered…

Just how the hell did Naruko manage to defeat the Hokage to begin with!?

He knew Naruko wouldn't remain in the village —too many people she disliked— and once you excluded obviously the most known places…

There was only one place that came to his mind to check in: the meadow just outside the village where she trained in the late afternoon —and he watched, because nine times out of ten she actually managed to wound herself while training to exhaustion.

He carefully walked through the undergrowth, before finally reaching the meadow in question and…well, Naruko who was currently laughing to herself and scratching the back of his head to…Mizuki's praise?

"Well done, Naruko," Mizuki said with a smile. "You've passed the secret Konoha exam to become a Genin," he added then…

And stupidly, he decided to just come out in that moment.

"Naruko!" he exclaimed, getting the attention of both the Chuunin and the girl who brightly smiled at him.

"Aniki! Look! I passed!" she was smiling brightly…she _really_ couldn't _truly_ believe such a…he remembered it was Naruko he was talking of, the girl who believed spoiled milk wasn't spoiled because it never asked for toys.

"Naruko…get away from him," he swallowed nervously. He was a civilian, and he was weaponless. In a shinobi village that was probably reasonable, but here? Here it clearly was suicidal. Why did he come out? He should have called for help back…or the Hokage could have given him an escort or something.

"Aniki?" she frowned, perplexed.

"There's no secret test," he said carefully keeping his eyes on the smirking Mizuki. "He had you steal the scroll of forbidden techniques of Konoha…he's a…traitor," he understood it then why the man was smirking.

To him, they were nothing more than mere…flies. He was a Chuunin and they were what, a Bunshin-less Genin and a Civilian?

Maybe if he actually left the man to talk…

"What!? B-But! But why!?" Naruko held on to the scroll as she jumped back and away from Mizuki.

"You want to know why?" Mizuki smirked. He was conflicted on the other hand: if he let him talk…but if he didn't, they were dead. So better to let him 'vent'. Bad guys in stories always went with really long monologues, which gave time to the good guys to arrive.

He hoped the good guys weren't that far behind though…

"You know why people hate you, Naruko? Why they can't stand their children playing with you, or why the glare and whisper behind your back? You know why? It's because you're the KYUUBI!" Mizuki actually laughed at that, as he pointed his finger at the now trembling girl. "The Kyuubi wasn't killed by the fourth! He sealed it in you! You hold a demon inside of you, and that's why nobody likes you, and why your so precious 'Aniki' is at odds with his family to boot!"

Now it was his turn to widen his eyes. What did _that_ have to do with _his_ situation? He was all for letting the man rant, but really…an explanation?

Maybe he was just saying hurtful things to Naruko and nothing more.

"You think anyone would have neared you, you demon brat? He's paid to be your friend!" that was a lie! "He's paid to let you call Aniki! He's paid to…"

Naruko laughed. She laughed hard and then wiped away her tears.

"Mizuki-sensei, really…that was a good one," she chuckled. "Aniki is not like that!" she pointed her own accusing finger at the Chuunin-sensei. "And I don't know why you're lying to me like this, but I'm Naruko Uzumaki, and I'm going to be Hokage one day, _**Dattebayo**_!"

She moved her hands in a strange position. "And for slandering my Aniki, I'll make you pay! _**TAJUU KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!**_"

The next moment, there was smoke.

Then, a sea of blond hair tied in ponytails. He swallowed nervously as he watched the amount of blue cerulean eyes blink in unison, before screaming.

"_**MIZUKI-SENSEI, YOU'RE GOING DOWN, 'TTEBAYO!**_"

He actually felt _pity_ for the Chuunin when five Naruko held him still and two more began to stomp down on his nuts. He hissed in pain as if he felt those hits and moved his gaze elsewhere as the screams of the Chuunin slowly died down.

"Naruko…don't kill him, all right?" he said to the crowd of Naruko waiting for a turn.

"Don't worry Aniki!" Naruko smiled —he hoped it was the original one— as she folded the forbidden scroll of techniques and brought it to him. "Neh…he was really lying, right?" she asked carefully, her gaze fixed on him.

He nodded. "I'm not paid to be your friend."

"Not that, Aniki…" her mood suddenly sobered up as the clones disappeared —leaving behind a twitching and broken form of Mizuki behind. "Me…being the Kyuubi…"

He ruffled her hair hard. "This little cute blonde, a big bad fox?" he teased her —because his heart had to regain himself from the shock of having survived a near death situation— as he smiled. "I don't believe that, do you?"

"No," she shook her head. "I don't…but…why do the people hate me, then?"

He exhaled, and then got down on one knee, to be at her same eye-level. His hands went to her shoulders, as he made a small sad smile. "Some people are just stupid like that, Naruko."

"Aniki?" she mumbled. "Am I in trouble with Jiji?"

"Probably not," he sighed. "You're an easily duped brat after all," he chuckled as Naruko pouted. "But you scared me," he added then looking at her seriously. "I was really worried. Don't you ever _dare_ do something like this again, understood? My heart isn't going to last long if you do."

She looked at him and then slowly hugged him, as he breathed deeply and returned the hug, gently caressing the back of her hair tied in ponytails. "I'm sorry," Naruko mumbled. "I swear…I swear I won't worry you again, Aniki."

Of course, that would not be the last time he'd end up worried about her…nor would it be the last time Naruko actually did something to make him worry…if only he had known…


	14. Being

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fourteen

"So," Hiruzen Sarutobi, the Sandaime Hokage, was biting on his pipe while looking at him. He was fidgeting and holding on to the forbidden scroll of techniques, apparently entrusted with guiding both the scroll and Naruko to the Hokage's office.

"I found the scroll…Naruko and a traitor?" he hazarded back as a reply.

"Aniki was really cool!" Naruko exclaimed. "He went all…You!" she made an over exaggerated gesture of pointing her finger at someone. "Are a traitor! And Mizuki went all 'Oh no! The Aniki of the wonderful and ultra-powerful Naruko Uzumaki! I'm defeated! Please don't kill me!' But I knew he was a traitor, yeah, really! So then I used the Kage Bunshin technique and…"

"You used the what, Naruko?" the Hokage asked with a small smile on his lips. He automatically knew the smile was something bad, because really…whenever did a smile from a military dictator ever account to something good?

"Kage Bunshin! It was the first technique on the scroll, 'ttebayo!" Naruko nodded firmly. "I created thousands of my clones 'ttebayo! And then since Aniki told me he was a traitor, I fought him down with my awesomeness!"

Hiruzen's lips quirked upwards. "Oh? Really?"

"Yeah Jiji! I was all 'ah! Take this fist in the name of awesome!' and 'Take this kick in the balls for'"

"Language!" he chided the girl, who sheepishly scratched the back of her head.

"So, yeah…I'm awesome 'ttebayo…"

"I understand," Hiruzen nodded. "And you did a great service to Konoha…even though you were directly responsible for the mess that happened." The Sandaime shook his head. "There is thus no choice, I think…"

"Hokage-sama," he interrupted the old man, "Surely, there's no need to punish Naruko," he took a step forward. He was _so_ going to die. "She was led by Mizuki, who lied to her. I know that maybe if it's a forbidden scroll then you shouldn't read it," he gave a withering glance to Naruko who actually had the grace to look chastised, "But…she did stop the traitor. Since I'm her guardian…if there's a punishment to take then…" his voice trailed off as he swallowed nervously.

"Ohi!" Naruko suddenly barked up. "No way Jiji! You don't get to punish my Aniki! I was the one who read the scroll damn it!"

"Naruko, quiet," he hissed back at the girl, who just shot him a half-angry look.

"No! Aniki's not at fault for this! Jiji! You can't!"

The Hokage blinked, once, and then he chuckled. He was sure it wasn't an 'evil chuckle of doom' thing, but still…

"You misunderstand: I am not punishing Naruko," he shook his head. "If anything, I am giving her a prize," he stood up, and then took out from one of his desk's drawers a forehead protector. "Come closer, Naruko," and then it was done. Naruko strapped to her forehead the piece of cloth and metal, with the symbol of Konohagakure etched on it, and then she was randomly hugging the Hokage and him in turn.

"Aniki! I'm a Kunoichi now! Did you see, eh? Eh?" she looked up at him with bright sparkling eyes, a bundle of joy and laughter. He just smiled back and patted her head.

"I told you I believed in you, didn't I?"

She nodded firmly. "Yeah!"

"You should go and rest for tonight," the Hokage said then. "Tomorrow, you have your team assignments, don't you? I'll notify the class…"

"With permission then, Hokage-sama," he bowed and left, with Naruko waving with a 'Bye Jiji!' as they left. As they walked their way back, Naruko kept on chuckling and grinning broadly.

"I'm a Kunoichi now, 'ttebayo," she giggled. "I'm a Kunoichi! You hear me, Konoha!?" she screamed that aloud as she walked along the street. Of course, some _replied_ immediately.

"SHUT UP! THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO SLEEP BRAT!"

"Naruko," he chided her, "it's late. Let's hurry home," Naruko just followed him after that. He stepped inside his apartment, already expecting to see Naruko heading towards her —that was just next to his— only to find her still grinning behind him.

He exhaled.

"Want to come in?"

She nodded vividly.

He closed the door after she stepped in. "I'm a Kunoichi!" she sung once more. "Now you'll see Aniki! I'll be the strongest there ever is!"

"I'm sure of that," he sighed as he prepared the bed. He was going to be sleeping on the sofa, he supposed.

"Neh, you haven't forgotten, right?"

He raised an eyebrow, before finally giving a small nod and a smile. "Of course: ramen's on me next time we go to Ichiraku."

"Yatta!" Naruko jumped on his chest the moment he turned having done the bed. She collided against his stomach, sending him to tumble on the bed and hit the wall with the back of his head.

"Ouch," he hissed. "Naruko!"

But the girl was already sleeping, softly grabbing onto his shirt with her hands that looked so small —those of a child, really. He sighed, had she planned this all along?

He'd wait until she actually stopped _faking_ being asleep, before moving to the sofa then. He side-fell on the bed, holding Naruko on to his chest as the girl's lithe frame weighted fairly little. He wondered where the girl packed the ramen intakes.

"Really," he mumbled hearing the girl's snores. "What are you crying even in your sleep for, worrywart?" his thumb slowly removed the glistening tears that fell down the girl's cheeks, as he sighed in resignation. He didn't doubt the girl had taken to heart her being the Kyuubi. Even if the Sandaime had ignored it…even if Mizuki had lied…the girl was a good judge of heart.

She knew even without him telling her, that Mizuki hadn't completely lied.

"You're not the Kyuubi, Naruko," he softly whispered to her ears. S-rank secret be damned, he doubted any Anbu 'guarding' her would actually have remained silent by that point. "You're the jailer of the beast…you're a hero, not a monster."

She snuggled closer to his chest, gripping tightly on his shirt.

"And it doesn't change anything," he murmured once more. "You're my precious sister…" he felt sleepy too. "That'll never change, no matter what."

And truly, that was the first time he'd be there for Naruko…but it wouldn't be the last.


	15. Risking

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifteen

"And so Kakashi-sensei arrived three hours late, really!" Naruko huffed as she flailed wildly with her arms. "I can't believe he said he didn't like us! Then we had to present ourselves and Sakura went all 'I like Sasuke-kun! And I dislike thieving cats and whatnot' and then Sasuke went all broody and angst and muttered darkly 'I want to kill a certain person!' really, Aniki! I've got the worst team ever!"

He hummed contently as he went through his bank account's notes to check on the new salary —it was quite a substantial increase.

"Aniki, are you listening to me?" Naruko whined. "I've got to take an important exam tomorrow! Survival training, yeah! The baka-sensei said I don't have to eat breakfast because I'll puke and…"

"If you don't puke after thirteen bowls of Ramen, you won't puke even if he were to gut you," he dryly remarked with an amused tone. "And I'm listening Naruko, I'm just looking how much money I can put aside this month with the bills and the rent."

Naruko scrunched her face up in thought. "Oh! I'll be starting missions soon! Then I'll become ultra-rich Aniki! Do you think I'll save a princess first and she'll make me a princess too? Or maybe I'll be battling evil ninjas and saving their hostages?"

Her eyes were sparkling as she came up with missions after missions that were clearly impractical to give to a Genin. He wondered just how far her imagination stretched sometimes, when she began to rant about how she'd totally be able to defeat some sort of giant metallic golem of death and doom if it ever crossed her path.

"I'm sure you will," he soothingly said back to her, "But Naruko, shouldn't you be training if tomorrow you have a test?"

Naruko smiled brightly as she simply sat down next to him, her head dropping down against his shoulder.

"I'm the most awesome kunoichi ever 'ttebayo! I don't need to train for tomorrow: it'll be a cinch!"

"Do you know what they say of pride and arrogance?" he retorted to her with a knowing look, as Naruko mocked having fallen asleep on his shoulder. "That they blind you to your defeat."

Naruko feigned snoring, as she dropped her head from his shoulder to his arm and then —most unconvincingly— nudged herself on his lap to sleep.

He grumbled beneath his breath something about buying a cat pillow for her, but smiled softly as he returned to his accounting.

It was as he was tapping his pen on the result that he saw a glint of silver hair coming from the 'hole'.

The 'hole' was one of Naruko's genius ideas of doom and despair. Naruko couldn't cook or wake up to save her life. She couldn't even clean or fight off the 'invaders' known as ants or cockroaches. Thus her idea was to always ask him for help —which meant that for a few days, he actually ended up walking from his apartment to hers on a minute-per-minute basis.

Then she had taken to eating breakfast at his apartment —because she always forgot to buy the eggs. Since they were neighbours, he had admitted defeat when she had begun leaving her stuff both in his and in her apartment.

Then Naruko had ended up doing a 'training' accident which had unfortunately resulted in a slightly torn wall —just so casually once more of the same size as Naruko— and that had even been hastily covered up by a horrendous painting found in the garbage. He could swear the eyes of the woman depicted on the picture were following him as he walked around the room.

"Aniki," Naruko softly moaned nuzzling herself closer to his chest. "I love ramen…" she actually began to drool at that. He rolled his eyes at that. Calmly, he hoisted her up —much to his back's chagrin because the girl _weighted_— and settled her down with a blanket on the sofa. Then, he went to look through the hole.

He saw nothing of importance, except a wooden basket filled with groceries.

He frowned, and then went outside —he would never pass through the 'hole'. He had the keys after all to both their apartments. He opened the door to Naruko's own flat and entered, before sighing to himself at the chaos.

"That girl…" he mumbled, shaking his head. If she had bought groceries, she should have placed them in the fridge —otherwise they were just going to spoil.

He finished putting everything in its place, storing the basket away, and then left to return to his apartment. Of course, Naruko was simply sprawled with her mouth wide snoring on the sofa, the blanket cast aside.

He placed the blanket back on her and hummed a small tune as he began to put away the stuff on the table. He supposed he'd have Naruko stay for dinner —it wasn't difficult to just add more rice and place less side-dishes around.

A knock at the door interrupted his thoughts, as he went to open it. He raised two surprised eyebrows at the sight of a silver haired shinobi with a forehead protector covering one of his eyes, and a mask on his face.

"Yoh," the man said with a hand up in salute. "You're Haruno?"

"Yes?" he hazarded.

"Good! I'm Kakashi Hatake," the man replied calmly, keeping his only visible eye sort-of morphed into a smile —how he did that was beyond him. "I heard around you're the one who keeps an eye out for Naruko, right?"

"And you want to know…" he began back only to widen his eyes for a moment, "Ah, you're Kakashi-sensei, right? Do you want to come in? Naruko's sleeping, but I can wake her up if you need something."

"It won't be necessary," the Jounin shook his head. "I just wanted to tell you something," he said conspiratorially as he moved closer. "I will most probably fail Naruko's team, and the fault will be yours," at those words, he frowned.

"W-What are you talking about? I never even met you!" he hissed back. "Naruko doesn't…"

"Haruno-san," he rolled his only eye. "Konoha values teamwork above all…and two of my potential team members nearly fought each other in front of me. Unless you can make a miracle happen, that team is bound to fail."

So that was what the 'thieving cat' meant to Sakura.

The girl just acted spoiled.

"Why not simply change the teams then?"

"Mah, it's a matter of tradition," the Jounin shrugged. "The dead last of the class goes with the rookie of the year and the first in class."

"So what? You want me to apologize to my sister?"

"That won't be necessary," the man smiled through his mask. "I just have the perfect exercise in mind, you see…"

That was the first time he actually agreed to do something for Naruko's benefit that placed him at risk…then again, it wouldn't be the last.


	16. Saving

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixteen

He remembered preparing breakfast for himself and Naruko —the girl having slept on his sofa the entire night. He remembered the doorbell ringing, and him moving to open it. He remembered all of that clearly.

Then there had been a blur of grey and nothing more.

When he next opened his eyes, he was dangling from a tree straight above a waterfall filled with jagged rocks.

He proceeded to faint again.

When once more he opened his eyes, he stared at the utterly drenched appearance of Naruko —breathing hard and with her entire frame trembling— and Sakura —who was righteously angered at their sensei. Even then, he simply blinked as Naruko's arms tightly hugged him.

The girl looked positively miserable, drenched and crying, but she still proceeded to hold tightly on his neck as if her life depended on it.

He would have hugged her back, if his hands hadn't been tied behind his back.

"Yo!" the silver streaked sensei said with a wave of his hand. "Thanks for cooperating."

"Onii-sama, are you…all right?" Sakura whispered looking at him.

"Oh, right! Aniki! Sakura-chan was great!" Naruko exclaimed, wiping away her tears. "She's like, really good! She made us place wire all around to slow down Kakashi-Baka…"

"It's Kakashi-sensei," the Jounin remarked dryly.

Naruko gave him a withering glare. The Jounin returned to his Icha-Icha.

"And really, you should like, totally talk to her! Yeah!" Naruko nodded firmly. "You can have two sisters instead of one, right? Right?" there was a light pleading tone in the back of her voice, which just made him sigh.

"Onii-sama," Sakura murmured. "Please…I know I was wrong," she looked downcast. "I know I said hurtful things…but I didn't want…I'm _sorry_."

He exhaled slowly. "Come on Aniki! Forgive her already! She told me and I think it's stupid to keep up being angry at her for something like that!"

He shook his head in disbelief, and finally he acquiesced. "Fine," he gestured for Sakura to move forward. The girl literally leapt in his arms with a squeal.

"Onii-sama!"

He hugged with his left arm the pink-haired girl, as his right instead circled around Naruko's shoulders. He remembered the scene all too well. He had just wanted to help his sister, and she had replied that as a 'civilian' he was better off leaving her alone.

The words exchanged had been hurtful, and he had stopped talking to her after that. Well, that and because she had said she really didn't want him as a brother at all —she had been angry back then, he supposed.

That had been the reason that brought him to read outside, on the bench in the park.

"Really," he sighed. "What am I ever going to do with you two?"

He slowly stood up, shaking the dust out of his clothes. "Well," he looked up at the sky. "Tell me someone warned the Academy I was 'kidnapped'."

The Jounin eye-smiled. "I have something to do! See you tomorrow at eight in front of the Hokage tower, kids."

With that, the man disappeared.

"Ehm…" his stomach grumbled. "Ichiraku?"

"Aniki's the best!" Naruko replied with a 'whoop' of joy. He laughed and began to walk behind the girl, before stopping for an instant and turning his gaze towards Sakura, who was standing there still.

"You're not coming?"

"Ah! Yes!" Sakura hurried behind him. His gaze then went to the silent Uchiha, who looking elsewhere seemed to be brooding.

"You want to come too?" he asked then to the boy.

The Uchiha huffed and then began to walk past them. "No, I've got to train."

He shuddered slightly —mockingly. "I feel the Emo-side strong within that one," he muttered looking at Naruko.

"Duckbutt is a brooding bastard," Naruko nodded back. "I don't understand why people like him, AnikI! You're much cooler when you brood than him!"

"I don't brood," he deadpanned back.

"Uh-Uh, you always brood when paying the bills!" Naruko nodded. "Always!"

"Onii-sama?" Sakura said hesitantly, as they moved through the streets of Konoha towards Ichiraku. "W…Will you come back home?"

"Sakura," he exhaled. "I already have a new home," he shrugged. "I was going to leave anyway after finding a job, so really…"

"Ah, I see," she grimaced. Then she blinked. "Where do you live, Onii-sama?"

"Right next to me 'ttebayo!" Naruko grinned. "Aniki's got the apartment closer to the Academy."

"Bought, not 'got'." He corrected Naruko without much verve.

He entered Ichiraku a moment later. Ayame's eyes locked with his.

"Ah!" she was wearing her usual white apron, but a floral looking pin rather than the usual white cowl held her hair away from her face.

"Naruko-chan, did you pass?" she asked.

"Yeah Ayame-neesan!" Naruko smiled brightly. "Baka-sensei told us we had to save Aniki or he'd die, and we all had to work together because he was dangling over a river with pointy rocks beneath him, and…"

He actually felt sick realizing just in what position he had been before. He was sort-of glad: he had been unconscious through the ordeal, so he wouldn't have any traumatizing memory to recall.

There was a moment of beatific silence after they ordered and began to eat —a moment which didn't last much longer.

"Neh, Aniki? You know Sakura-chan doesn't actually like Sasuke-bastard? She has a crush on—"

"_SHANNARO! NARUKO! YOU SWORE!_" a punch flew from Sakura's side towards Naruko's cheek, hitting the girl and sending her to fly against the nearby wall.

"Sakura-chan!" Naruko whined. "Why don't you tell Aniki!?"

"Tell me what?" he raised an eyebrow.

"She likes—" Naruko's voice came less by Sakura's attempt to strangle her.

"No one, Onii-sama!" she exclaimed red in the face. "No one at all!" then she whispered to Naruko's ears —loud enough for him to hear anyway. "You speak of this and I will _kill_ you, understand?"

Naruko sweated as she nodded furiously.

"Good!" Sakura smiled then cheerfully, before taking her seat back. "And I'll be visiting your house soon, Onii-sama! Kami only knows what mess you have made without someone cleaning it!"

He blinked. "Wait, the one cleaning my room back at…"

Sakura began innocently to whistle.

He shuddered in fear.

Naruko went back to eating Ramen without a worry in the world.


	17. Chilling

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventeen

There was a knock at the door. He yawned and stretched, before heading over to open.

"Onii-sama!" and a blur of pink entered his apartment.

He closed the door.

There was another knock.

He opened the door.

"Aniki!" and a blur of orange entered his apartment.

He closed the door once more.

There was yet one more knock. He raised an eyebrow. Both girls were in his apartment now, weren't they?

He went to open the door. Both of his eyebrows rose.

"Hi," Ayame was actually blushing as he let her in. Just to be sure, he looked outside once more. Once he was positive no one else had to enter his apartment, he closed the door.

He turned to look at the 'carnage'. Sakura was already maniacally tidying and…hadn't he left a glass on the counter a moment before?

Naruko was happily reading a book in a corner, while Ayame was instead fidgeting and looking around.

"Is…is something the matter, Ayame?" he asked perplexed.

"Ah…yes! My father's going to the hospital for a check-up tomorrow morning," she said. "It's a Sunday morning, so I understand if you'd rather sleep in, but…could you…perhaps…help me in the shop?"

"I don't know how to cook ramen," he pointed out. "I mean…if you need a hand with—"

"Oh, I'll help Aniki!" Naruko exclaimed. "Teuchi-san said we can have all the ramen that is about to spoil after the lunch rush!"

"And Onii-sama," Sakura remarked. "It's not healthy to remain cooped up in this filth and sleep all morning," Sakura nodded firmly as she swept away…wait a moment, why were her hands in his underwear drawers!?

"Sakura, are you…"

"Yes Onii-sama?" she sweetly smiled at him, becoming the perfect picture of innocence.

"Never mind," he acquiesced. He then turned to Ayame and nodded. "If I can help…"

"Ah, thank you!" Ayame smiled and then hugged him once, before turning a crimson read and excusing herself a moment later.

Naruko looked at him with a perplexed look, her book forgotten. Sakura had a broken plate —which had snapped recently in her effort of washing it— between her hands.

"ANIKI!"

"ONII-SAMA!"

"What!?" he screamed jumping back in fright from the twin gazes that were looking at him quite strongly.

"Aniki, you can't! Ayame-neesan is like a sister!"

"Wait, I can't what? Help her?" he was perplexed.

"Not that! She's asking you to take away your Sunday morning of rest, Onii-sama!" Sakura replied.

"But you said I shouldn't oversleep on Sundays, Sakura," he couldn't understand what was going on, but he just hoped they'd make some sense to him before the end of the day.

Naruko pouted, as Sakura turned slightly red as she stammered. "It doesn't matter, Onii-sama! She…she's got bad intentions, yeah!"

"Who? Ayame? Come on," he rolled his eyes. He walked closer to the pink-haired brat that was his sister and ruffled her hair. "It's Ayame, she wouldn't hurt a fly."

Sakura's nose erupted in a fountain of blood as she fell lifelessly on the ground with a lecherous grin on her face. He removed his hand a moment later and flexed it. "What…"

Naruko blinked, and then sheepishly began to giggle.

He turned to the girl, and raised an eyebrow.

"Aniki, you're going to be all right, right?" Naruko asked then.

"What are you lot worrying about!? Come on! It's Ayame! _AYAME_!"

"Yeah but Aniki, you know what they say of the quiet ones!" Naruko exclaimed, flailing her hands around.

"Uh? What do they say about them?"

"I don't know! They're quiet for a reason!" Naruko said. "Like, there's this girl who's following me," she shuddered. "It's creepy. I look around a corner and she's there fidgeting. I go and train and she's behind the trees watching me!"

"You should tell your sensei about that…"

"Nah! I'm sure she's just stalking me!"

He raised his right hand as if to say something, but then simply lowered it, nodded to himself, and then grabbed Naruko in a headlock to ruffle with strength her head.

"_THAT'S NOT SOMETHING POSITIVE_!" he screamed as he ruffled her hair until her scalp turned reddish before releasing her. Naruko winced as she held her head with both hands. He huffed. "Stalking is stalking. It's a bad thing. You should tell the girl to either come out clean or stop. Understood?"

"Muh…yeah," she dropped her shoulders and grabbed the book once more. She sulked for a bit —which meant three to four seconds— and then returned to smile as she chuckled for a passage of the book.

Sakura came to her senses at night. The fact she had been moaning words 'Onii-sama don't' or had giggled while whispering 'it's improper' didn't actually calm down his thoughts…but then again, there probably was a rational explanation.

The moment Sakura's eyes opened, and she realized she had been sleeping on her Onii-sama's bed, she began to breathe really hard.

"Are you all right, Sakura?" he asked worriedly. Maybe she had caught a fever?

"ANF…yeah," Sakura smiled weakly. "Really," she brought the sheets up to her nose. "Onii-sama? Anf…can…I…sniff…"

"Uh?"

"Can I sleep here tonight?"

"Did you tell—"

"She thinks I'm sleeping at a friend's place," she replied instantaneously.

"Neh, Aniki! Sakura can sleep with me in my room!" Naruko said brightly. "It would be like a sleepover!" she frowned then, "What do you do at a sleepover?"

Sakura slowly stood from the bed, and was about to say no when…

"Yeah, you're right," Sakura smiled sweetly. "It's a sweet idea, Naruko-chan!"

There was a bad chill in the back of his spine…

The girls left through the 'hole', the circular passageway created by a mistake in 'training' that Naruko made a few months prior —and which she had never fixed. He used to cover 'the hole' with a strap of cloth, but now he actually felt it was…sort of an undefended entrance.

He sighed and went to cook dinner. There really was no way they'd do anything strange. No pranking in the apartment was a clear set rule.

The next morning, the fabled Sunday Morning, he found himself firmly trapped between two snoring and half-giggling bodies. One was Sakura, who was moaning slightly while firmly holding his arm trapped with both of hers. Naruko on the other hand was biting down on his pyjama while muttering about 'noodle' and 'ramen king'.

Years of sleeping near Naruko made him able to free himself from such a situation.

"Naruko…free ramen to your right," he whispered.

Still asleep, Naruko replied…

"Yeahy," and then she rolled and fell face first on the ground with a dull thud. The fact she kept on sleeping…

That was just Naruko.

Getting free of his other sister instead…Well, he carefully began to pinch her cheek until the girl frowned and moved a hand to 'swat' away the insect. The moment she did that, he grabbed the pillow and pushed it in the place of his arm. He stood up then and mentally chuckled.

He was such a ninja, wasn't he?

Carefully walking trying not to make a sound, he managed to dress up and leave the two sleeping girls behind. He reached Ichiraku just in time to watch Teuchi leave. The cook looked at him with a smile and a half-serious glare.

"You have any impure thoughts about my daughter, and I'll castrate you," Teuchi said with a smile as clasped hands with him.

He swallowed nervously and smiled. "Understood, sir."

"Good!" and then with a laugh, Teuchi was off.

Thankfully, Ayame knew what had to be done, and as he moved pans and pots, filled them with water, and generally did the 'heavy' lifting, the girl proceeded to cook and take orders. It wasn't busy until the actual beginning of the lunch rush.

When the lunch rush ended, with him sweating bullets from the effort, he had a renewed respect for Teuchi: the old man was able to laugh while working behind lit ovens nearly the entire day. He'd be dead by the end of the afternoon if it kept up.

He still hadn't seen Naruko or Sakura, but then again Naruko would probably sleep until noon or beyond, and Sakura…

Why was he imagining her with a pair of his underwear on her head while drunkenly exclaiming 'Onii-sama's stuff is all mine! Mineeee! My treasure! My Precioussss!'

He chuckled to himself and shook his head. Really, Sakura was a good girl: she wasn't going to drink his sake stash…would she?

As the last customers left, he realized Ayame was gently wiping away the sweat from his brows with a handkerchief, a small smile on her face.

"So, you liked it?" she asked with a knowing look.

"It was…exhausting," he admitted. "Not bad but…I'd rather keep up my work at the academy."

Ayame sighed, and then wistfully looked towards the road.

She giggled a moment later. "Neh, you see behind the garbage cans?"

He raised an eyebrow and looked, before nearly face-palming. Sakura, Naruko and a pale white-eyed girl he had never seen before were looking in their direction.

Their combined gazes were supposed to be 'murderous'. The correct gaze they gave off was more of a 'my stomach aches, do you have medicine?'

Finally, Naruko took the cue to advance first and sit, soon followed by the other two.

"Naruko-chan!" Ayame smiled brightly. "What can I get you?"

"I'll have Pork Ramen!" Naruko exclaimed brightly, before Sakura nudged her in the ribs and forced her to wince. "Ah, no, thank you Ayame-neesan but…but I'm…" she was actually fighting down the tears. "I'm here to ask if…if we could have Aniki back for the rest of the day!"

"Muh," Ayame muttered with a thoughtful gaze. "And why should I give him back to you?"

"Eh…Ehm," the white eyed girl murmured meekly, and ended up being completely ignored by the apparent triangle of electric stares the three girls on the other side were currently busy with. He sighed and then turned to her with a small smile.

"Can I help you?" he asked gently, "Hungry?"

Hinata blushed.

The 'Aniki' was someone Naruko aspired to. She…she had talked to her because her Aniki had said so. The reason she was now…she was _friends_ with Naruko now and not simply someone-who-observed-her-from-afar-even-when-she-w as-under-the-shower was that Aniki had said so.

She nodded. She nodded firmly.

If…if she got in Aniki's good graces, then she would get in Naruko's good graces.

"They're a rambunctious bunch, aren't they?" he asked her, with a small smile as he brought her the menu. She smiled timidly, turning slightly red. He had such soft hands…turned raw from working hard in the stall. Naruko had said her Aniki had been taken away by the stall vendor to work but…but he had accepted, so he had a great heart too.

Hinata turned red.

If…if Aniki fell in love with her, then Naruko would fall in love with her.

That…

That was perfect!

She'd have to follow 'Aniki' first however. She needed to know what he liked and what he didn't like.

She'd rummage through his garbage first thing in the morning. Yes, she'd do that.

His spine felt another set of dark chills, as he smiled to the pale skinned Hyuga whose name turned out to be 'Hinata'. He wondered…

Was he ever going to be without chills for one day?


	18. Protecting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Eighteen

He felt watched.

He didn't know when the feeling had started, but suddenly, he felt watched in the afternoons. Naruko and Sakura had gone off to their first C-rank mission, and he had finally the peace and quiet life back to himself. He had bought half a dozen of underwear recently, because the old ones had disappeared mysteriously.

Somehow his cupboards had also filled with cup ramen overnight, and a chibi-drawing of Naruko winking at him was visible on the fridge after that, with the words 'Eat your daily Ramen!' written on it.

He actually had the time to socialize with the other teachers of the academy that day, and thus as 'noble and hardworking' sensei, they'd all be going to a tea house to enjoy in some relaxing tea ceremony.

Thankfully, the feeling of being under watch waned away as soon as the night came. Iruka Umino was next to him as they both chuckled beneath their breaths when the Kunoichi Class Sensei scoffed at the crude display of flowers. The kimono wearing Geisha entered one after the other with grace, their richly coiffed hair embroidered with golden baubles.

Their faces were all smiles and cheers, and soon the tea was prepared and served.

"So, how's Naruko doing?" Iruka asked him, after taking the customary sip of tea.

"She's as…vivacious as ever," he replied. "Always running around and training hard," he shook his head. "She'll be the death of me."

"That's good to hear, we need a bit of laughter in the village," Iruka remarked.

"She looks just like that Mitarashi," the Kunoichi teacher spoke then bitterly. "I'm sure she'll end up the same too. Nothing good will come of that, let me tell you," she pointed her accusing and withering glare at him.

"Now that's not right," he replied. "Naruko's a sweet child once you get her to calm down."

"A sweet child doesn't fill the flower pots with bee and wasp nests!" she remarked bitterly.

"She did that?" he asked carefully.

"Of course she did! Thankfully, no one was stung, but it was a dangerous prank! My, if someone had been allergic…"

"She did that for no reason at all?" he raised an eyebrow.

The woman scoffed. "It's not like a tasteless brat like her could learn the fine arts of flower arrangement or grace to begin with."

"I'm sure that if she tried, she'd manage it without a worry," he remarked looking to his teacup. "She never gives up, as long as there's someone who believes she can do it."

"Of course I shouldn't be having this argument with you: you can't be objective," the woman rolled her eyes. "You've practically adopted her."

"Well," he smiled slightly. "I suppose it tells something, that she latched on someone like me, who merely spent most of his time reading books on a bench. You aren't objective either. Did you really give Naruko a chance, or did you simply spite her?"

"Now, now," Iruka said nervously chuckling. "Let's calm down…"

"Of course I'm a teacher, and I gave her a chance! When she mocked my class, I just threw her out! And the next time, she couldn't even answer a single question! She really had no intentions of becoming a refined Kunoichi at all!"

"Or maybe she acted like a child the first time, like many other students regularly do!" his voice grew slightly heated, "And the next time, you asked her questions on the previous lesson didn't you? And she couldn't answer them because no one in her class had told her what the lesson had been about! She had all the intentions of taking your class, but you just shot her down in the beginning, without even giving her a chance!" he was breathing raggedly, holding on to the teacup with strength.

"W-What do you know about it anyway," the woman scoffed back, slightly pale.

"I know because _she asked me! _When there was a question she couldn't ask you, because you refused to answer, _she asked me!_ I was the one who taught her how to read and write, because no one else wanted to! And if I have to stay here and hear you slander her efforts and her dedication to learning when a lesser person would have just surrendered to the pressure and given up, then I'd better be going before I do something I regret!"

He stood up then and, fuming, left the room while the Geisha who had assisted at the entire scene in mute silence didn't know what to do.

He paid his share at the reception and left afterwards. He'd go to Ichiraku and grab a bite —his tongue felt bitter.

Really, he wondered how Naruko could never get angry with them. He'd be fuming. He settled near the counter and nodded to Teuchi —Ayame had probably gone upstairs to sleep.

"Bad day?" the ramen maker asked.

"You have no idea," he grumbled. "Do you also serve sake by chance?"

"Drinking when angry never works, you should take that from experience," Teuchi acquiesced. "It just makes things worse."

He clenched his hands for a moment, and then took a deep breath. He shook his head clear of his thoughts and exhaled. "Yeah, you're right."

A steaming bowl of Pork ramen ended up in front of him then.

"This is on the house, kid," Teuchi said with a small smile. "So, what happened with Naruko?"

"Uh? How do you know it was about her?"

"You are always worked up when it's about her," Teuchi shrugged. "It's no secret you care about the kid, you know you used to vent off by talking with me, right?"

"Yeah," he shook his head. "Sorry…thanks for the meal," he opened his chopsticks and slowly began to eat.

Unknown to him, a purple haired woman —who had been in a Geisha outfit far earlier during the night— watched the scene with a predator-like smirk.

He didn't feel a chill run through his spine.

He felt like the Shinigami had just begun sharpening the scythe, especially when a kunoichi he had never seen before —wearing a fishnet shirt and a long leather coat— entered the stall and sat down next to him. Far too close to his comfort zone.

"Hey old man! I'll take a Pork Ramen!"

And why in the name of Kami did she remind him of Naruko to begin with!?

**Author's note**

**This follows the 'light' atmosphere typical of Harem-Anime/Manga like Love Hina and as such, there is no 'One+many' but simply 'One+True Love'+many outside.**

**And I don't write lemon, so kindly, don't compare this to Harem stories where they end up doing stuff.**

**This is rated T.**

**And everything is fluffy and happy. No angst. No drama. Fluffy and Happy.**

**Fluffyyyyy.**

***My muse just lost it***


	19. Dating

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Nineteen

He had a date.

Now, he didn't actually know _how_ it had happened, but he had a date.

He was fidgeting as he gave himself another look in the mirror. It would be nothing grand: just a bit of walking around talking, the cinema and then dinner afterwards. The way the woman had expressed it, he was indebted to her for 'not having brought her back home when drunk' and 'having a lecherous gaze'.

He actually doubted he had done the latter, and for the first, he didn't even know the woman in question.

Still, he had a date.

He settled once more his clothes —he had preferred casual wear— and then walked out. He was supposed to meet the woman near the park, walk towards the Cinema and then dinner, and after that… he'd go from there. Considering the time and the good first impression and all, he arrived with half an hour of time to spend. He did just that, sitting on the bench and taking out a book from his inner pocket.

He began to wait.

The half hour passed by quickly, and soon the woman was five minutes late.

Five minutes became ten.

Ten minutes became a quarter, and that was pushing it with the cinema.

When fifteen minutes became twenty, he began to look around. The 'location' had been clear-cut, and it wasn't as if there were other benches at the centre of the park he could sit on. Furthermore, the woman was a kunoichi without a doubt; so really, she should have been able to find him without worry.

At twenty-five minutes, they were late for the cinema.

At thirty minutes, he began to tap his foot. Therefore, the cinema was out. It was a pity, because he had bought the tickets beforehand. It even was the latest film of Princess Gale, and females dug the sub-romantic plot between Princess Gale and her subordinate.

Thirty minutes became forty.

Forty became one hour.

At that time, it became a question of principle.

Maybe he had been stood up as a sort of game between Kunoichi? Maybe the woman had been a friend of the sensei of the Kunoichi class…

The fact was, maybe it was he who shouldn't have brought his hopes that high. The woman hadn't even told him her name to begin with —actually, maybe she didn't remember at all their conversation, considering how drunk she had been.

He exhaled and pushed his back against the bench. The sun was settling and the night was slowly crawling up. Soon, there would be no light left to read.

He closed the book when his eyes began to hurt, and he kept on waiting.

One hour became two hours.

At the two hour and twenty-five minutes, he actually wondered if there were people who actually dug doing these sorts of tricks to people. They weren't funny, and they wasted time. His reservation at the restaurant was just about to become moot too.

Finally, after two hours and half, the woman in question sheepishly appeared in a flicker in front of him.

"H-Hey!" she smiled. "Sorry I'm late! Work was pretty tough this time around!"

He exhaled and slowly stood up.

"If we hurry, we can still make it for the restaurant," he said then. "I'm…"

The other kunoichi simply smiled at that, before sheepishly scratching the back of his head —why did she remind him of Naruko? He hoped Naruko wasn't playing him an elaborate prank with a Kage Bunshin, a Henge and the Sexy No Jutsu.

"Oh, I'm Anko!"

"Like the red bean paste?" he blinked as he began to walk towards the restaurant.

"Yep!" she nodded. "By the way, I totally didn't think you'd wait for two hours and half, you know?"

"Well, I thought that if I left, and then you arrived five minutes later…it wouldn't be nice."

"It wouldn't be _nice_?" Anko snickered. "What are you, an elementary student?"

He raised an eyebrow, and then he sighed. "Sorry, you just keep reminding me of someone I know, and she prefers simple terms."

"Ohi, are you insulting me?" there was a tick mark on her forehead then.

"Well, didn't you start it?" he remarked with a smile.

The fact the woman grinned back fiercely as she suddenly had a dango stick in her mouth made him blink once from the surprise. The second time he blinked…had someone pinched his ass!?

He frowned. Nah, it had to be his imagination.

"So, tell me a bit about you," Anko began with her happy and smirking face —as if she had won some sort of lottery. The way she was brushing her left hand's fingers one against the other…had she touched something nice?

"What about?"

"No special things? Come on, every man likes to brag," Anko smiled. "It's in your genes. Like how you've got a beautiful apartment, how you earn enough money to be a Daimyo or how in truth you hide your secret ninja identity of triple S-rank."

"Someone actually says that?"

Anko chuckled. "Oh, it happened once."

"I'm afraid I'm just a normal teacher," he shrugged.

"Mah! That's boring," Anko shook her head. "Then, if you're so _normal_…how about you tell me something about you that is special in your opinion?"

"I make good omelettes," he deadpanned.

"And that's special how, exactly?" Anko snorted.

"I suppose…" he mulled it over for a moment. "Aha! I can read five books in a day!"

Anko's shoulders sagged down terribly.

"Really? Come on man, give me something to work with!"

"Sorry, sorry…I'm new to the 'be the rebound guy'."

Anko raised an eyebrow. "You actually caught on that?"

"Well," he sighed, "We never met before, suddenly you all but force me on a date, and then you arrive late… so I'm either the rebound guy, or you just felt pity since you spoke when you were drunk."

"Oh…" Anko smirked. "I'm not a pity drunk," she added. Sultrily, she moved her lips closer to his ears before whispering. "I'm a _horny_ drunk."

He felt the weather suddenly heat up —really, had someone turned up the temperature?

The next morning, he woke up with a pounding headache, naked and next to a —of course— naked body of a purple haired woman in his apartment.

He actually had only one thought in mind…

_What. The. Hell._

Then, _of course_, someone knocked at the door.

He still had his boxers on however…didn't that count for something? You can't rape someone if they have their boxers still on, right?

_Right!?_

Then again, why was he panicking to begin with? It wasn't as if…sheesh, he couldn't recall the day before at all. Had something happened? He remembered going to dinner, yes, then saying something when he heard some hurtful comments…Anko's surname was Mitarashi…

There had been something else about…oh yes, the woman had presented him to her favourite bar…and relative barman.

There was a fuzzy memory of him dancing on a table together with Anko, but that memory was soon erased by his logical thought process: he'd never dance on a table, drunk or not.

Then they had gone home…his was closer…

And he couldn't recall beyond that.

So, either he had forgotten 'that' or he hadn't. If he hadn't, then it meant nothing had happened.

Which actually meant he'd probably slam his head against the wall soon.

The knocking increased slightly.

Was it a Monday?

Sheesh…wait.

It was a Monday. He was supposed to be at work.

"Uhm…not so rough," Anko whispered next to him. "Ah…"

Was it normal, that he wanted to scream?


	20. Shuddering

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty

He was officially reprimanded for being late that day, and after swearing he wouldn't do it again, he resigned himself to overworking for a while. He received frosty glares from the Kunoichi teacher, but refused to bow his head and beg forgiveness.

He wasn't the one wrong: she was!

As he piled another stack of papers, he heard the window of the academy open. He didn't even glance at who was entering, but simply looked at the marks he still had to grade. Usually when a Chuunin entered from the window it was because they had forgotten something —and all ninja were too fast for him to see anyway.

It was then that a pair of hands covered his eyes, and a feminine voice said with a teasing voice.

"Guess who?"

"Anko?"

He remarked, feeling slightly embarrassed…what exactly did you say to someone you '_might'_ have done '_that'_ with? 'Maybe' take a pill? Then again, saying something like that would be rude, wouldn't it?

"Exactly! You win a prize!" she hugged him from behind, letting him feel with the back of his head her perky breasts. "So, mister boring teacher…" he could feel her smile, "You doing anything important right now?"

"I'm doing some extra hours because I was late this morning. Weren't you scolded too at work?"

"Ah…I've got way, way laxer bosses…and sometimes I don't get to work for quite a bit but they pay me all the same!" she dropped her chin on his head, while her hands went roaming on his cheeks. "So, how about we go outside, and I finish corrupting you?"

"I'm sorry, but work is work," he replied while nervously swallowing. "And…uhm," he felt the two tickets for the cinema still in his pocket. "If you want, you can go see this with a friend. I probably won't have free time this week at all to begin with," he handed her the tickets, only to see her hazel pupil-less eyes blink and look back at him perplexedly.

"What? Like…no strings attached?"

"I don't have time; you probably have…knock yourself out?"

She answered that by roughly tongue kissing him in that instant, holding his mouth hostage with her own.

By the time she was finished, he had a faint trace of her lipstick on his lips, and a light dribble of drool down the corner of his mouth.

"I will!" she cackled and then dashed out of the window.

He looked up at the ceiling a moment more.

"What the hell…was that?" he murmured softly, before wiping his lips with the back of his hand. Five seconds of calm, and then he was back working.

If he ignored the elephant in the room, he could still do his work.

He should have asked if they did something, but he had half the feeling that he wouldn't get a definite answer from the woman. By the time he was done with his work, he left the academy while whistling and someone promptly grabbed his waist five seconds later.

He even got a sack over his head, and when he came to, he was in an underground bunker filled with torture devices, his arms strapped to a chair just like his head.

He swallowed nervously. That had been something fast to do, but…well, torture instruments. He wasn't supposed to panic. It wasn't as if they'd torture him for nothing, right? They would ask him questions, maybe, concerning what? Did the Kunoichi teacher have friends in high places?

"Well," a deep male voice grumbled. "You're the guy who went out with Anko last night, weren't you?"

Oh Kami…if he was the _rebound_ guy, then…then he was the ex-boyfriend? An interrogator? He was screwed.

"Now, now, no need to be afraid…" there was the sound of a screwdriver starting to work. "If you did nothing wrong, then there's nothing to fear."

"Ehi…listen…aren't you taking this…a bit too far?" he tried weakly.

"Who? Me? No, I'm just doing my job," the man came into view a moment later. A bandana covered his face as he had the wickedest grin he had ever seen. He was staring at Ibiki Morino, and that…that nearly made him faint. _Ibiki Morino_, the head of the Torture and Interrogation Department…was Anko's ex!?

Oh Kami…he was so _dead_.

"Look, pal," he tried with a slight and nervous smile. "I understand you're angry, but…"

"Oh no, on the contrary," Ibiki smiled like a feral wolf, "I'm happy Anko found someone."

Wait, so he wasn't the ex-boyfriend?

"Then…why this?"

"Well, I need to make sure you're up to it. You see, in our line of work, it's normal for spies to come closer to some of our members to get information…and you? You could be the perfect sleeper agent…"

He swallowed. So…this wasn't the boyfriend, but the Papa-Bear?

Oh, wonderful…he was screwed.

"Let's start with something easy," Ibiki smiled.

He shuddered.

When he was brought out —with a black bag over his head to prevent him from seeing where the place was— he was pretty sure he had told the man even his bank account number —and something told him the man knew it to begin with!

He actually felt _violated_. It was probably the feeling of being powerless, but it still was not a good thing. He needed a shower, urgently.

He actually wobbled his way back home and entered, closing the door behind him and firmly embracing himself as if he had shivers. It hadn't been funny. It hadn't been normal. It…Really, he had been in the torture and interrogation department of Konoha! Who sane of their minds would enjoy such a place!?

He didn't even want to know how Anko and Ibiki knew each other. He didn't want to know _anything at all!_

He remained under the showerhead for ten good minutes, until the boiler gave away and the water turned icy cold.

He was out of the shower once he realized his skin was turning pale and cadaveric, and as he carefully slipped on some more comfortable clothes, he laid face down on the mattress of his bed. He shuddered in his sleep.

When he next awoke, it was to find a _basket of fruit_ on his table and a note settled between them.

Someone had entered his house in the night, without him hearing them, and then had left…but that didn't make him feel any safer than before.

He carefully looked at the note, and shuddered once more.

_Sorry for what Ibiki did! He's really sorry too! This is from the people of the Torture and Interrogation Department, hope you enjoy!_

_PS: are you free next Saturday?_

_PPS: Who cares, I'm coming next Saturday anyway!_

_XXX, the one and only Anko!_

"Kami," he muttered. "Kami help me, please."


	21. Running

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-One

It was Friday. Naruko and her team were supposed to have returned two days earlier. They hadn't. He was worried.

It didn't matter that it was just a C-rank, or that generally there was nothing to fear about them. Even Iruka had actually explained to him that C-ranks were just boring, over-glorified missions. Nothing more than patrolling or long-term things and with little to no risk for contact with enemies.

He was supposed to be relieved.

He wasn't.

He was nervous, because he not only felt _watched_, but he also felt _followed_. It was as if someone was looking at him in every single moment of his life, and that was making him mad with fear.

He took a deep breath in the middle of the road and calmed down. Really, he was just being paranoid. It wasn't as if a shinobi would just randomly drop down from the sky and put a black bag over his head to kidnap him a moment later…which had happened, but it wasn't supposed to happen ever again.

He returned home with his groceries in hand, unlocking the door and stumbling in. He dropped the plastic bags on the table, and then exhaled softly. Everything was fine; it wasn't as if he was being followed.

He closed the door a moment later, and then began to put the food in the fridge.

"Everything's fine, you're just being paranoid," he muttered to himself. "Just paranoid…really."

There was a knock at the door. He nearly jolted for the knife nearby, but calmed himself. Really, what if it was the owner asking for the rent? He went to open the door, and suddenly life was fine again.

Naruko entered running, and as he closed the door behind him and turned to speak, she was already opening the cupboards.

"Aniki!" Naruko yelled in her usual and familiar voice, "You didn't eat your ramen even once!"

"Ramen is an unhealthy habit, Naruko," he remarked slowly moving towards the back of the girl in question. "Aren't you forgetting something?"

He asked her as he began to chop down the vegetables for dinner.

"Uh? What about, Aniki!?" the girl fidgeted nervously. Was there a blush on her face?

"Come on," he winked at her. "I know you want to say it."

"I…I can?" she asked softly.

"Try, you're the courageous one, aren't you?"

Naruko was about to speak, when she suddenly clapped her hands together. "I need to do this properly then!"

She dashed out of the room, closing the door loudly and then furiously knocking on the other side of it. He sighed and smiled as he went to open the door, where Naruko stood now bashfully looking downwards.

"A…Aniki, I'm back home!"

"Welcome back," he smiled and then gestured for her to enter. She answered by hugging him around his waist. The hug was tight and filled with…with something else. "Naruko? Was your mission all right?"

"Yeah," she muffled out with her face still pushing against his stomach. "It was fine, Aniki…"

She detached herself slightly, to look at him with her bright cerulean eyes. "You know, you're one of my precious persons right?"

He blinked. "Of course I know that, Naruko…is everything really…"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she nodded, swiping away something from her eyes. "Just…you know, I'll become really strong so…so I'll protect you and…"

He got down on one knee. "Naruko?" he asked worriedly, "What happened during your mission?"

"T…There was this boy…" she choked out, "he…he had a precious person to protect but…but he was also our enemy and…and he…he died because…" her face turned pale as she dashed for the bathroom. He heard her retch and quickly stood up, before closing the door of the house and running to hold the girl's hair out of the way.

Grimacing, Naruko pulled herself out from hugging the toilet and muttered, tears streaking down her face. "I…I should have stopped him, he was just there…he was wounded and I…I fought him and it looked…like he had killed Sasuke so I…I was angry and I thought…what if it's Aniki there and…and…" she was sobbing uncontrollably after that, her face red and filled with tears.

"Oh hush," he whispered soothingly, tightly hugging the girl back and pressing her face against his shoulder. "Worrywart, I'm not going anywhere, how many times must I repeat it? I'm not going to die in a battle…I'm a civilian," he added. "It's not…it's not like someone will attack Konoha eventually."

Orochimaru sneezed.

"And really, what are the odds they'll wipe out Konoha from the maps?"

Nagato sneezed.

"I mean, it…it was a bad thing, but it's not like all your C-rank missions will be like this in the future."

_Many_ people sneezed.

"And you want to become Hokage, no? You'll have to do many missions for that and you can't worry about little old me when out there," he chuckled, ruffling her hair. "You're better now?" he whispered.

"Uh-uh," Naruko mumbled. She gripped tightly on his clothes and then muttered. "You promise?"

"I think I already did once," he remarked. "Didn't I?"

"Yeah, but you promise you won't die, right? You're one of my precious persons, I can't…I can't lose you."

He gently headbutted her, she winced and made a 'ouch' noise.

"Aniki! What was that for!?"

"There! This suits you better," he chuckled as he stood up. "No moping in here, Naruko! Come on, dinner won't cook itself alone!"

"Ah! We can go and eat Ramen to celebrate!" she exclaimed following him.

"I was already chopping the vegetables," he complained with a sigh, "But if you prefer—"

"Yeah! I'm the awesome kunoichi who returned from her mission! I get to choose where we eat!"

"Oh?" he raised an eyebrow with a smile forming on his lips. "And when do I get to choose where we eat?"

"Whenever you offer the meal, Aniki!" she stuck her tongue out at him and laughed as he finished placing the chopped vegetables in a bag —he'd have them for lunch the next day then.

"Why you! Fine! Then Ichiraku's dinner is on you!" he rebuffed her crossing his arms, "And only one cup of ramen!"

"What!? NO!" Naruko shrieked in mock-despair, grabbing tightly on his leg. "Please not only one! Please!"

"Ah-ha!" he laughed, completely forgetting about his worries as he left the apartment, Naruko in tow being dragged as she held on to his leg.

At Ichiraku, he discovered there was also Ayame doing the night shift this time —probably because Saturday was a school-free day for her?

"Oh! Haruno-san," she stressed out his surname as if it was an insult, making him frown. "Is your girlfriend coming?"

Why was she smiling sweetly now? He swallowed nervously as Naruko dropped on the seat next to him with a perplexed face.

"Eh? Ayame-neechan, what are you talking about? _Aniki has a girlfriend!?_"

Her scream soon met with a shriek coming from Sakura's house direction, where the pink-haired girl had felt the chill she associated with a wench coming close to her brother…too close for her tastes.

"Well…I don't know about that," he sheepishly admitted. "I mean, we went on a date once and I can't remember what happened afterwards…I'm going on another one this Saturday, you think I should bring her a gift for the second time we meet?"

"Yes," Ayame smiled sweetly, "Strychnine."

He sweatdropped as he nervously chuckled.

"Isn't that excessive, Ayame?"

"Ah! My little girl likes to joke," Teuchi said with a brighter smile than ever, now that he didn't have to worry about the boy being a 'boyfriend' risk.

"Welcome back from your mission, Naruko! This is on the house!" as he said that and dropped the bowl of ramen in front of the girl, he saw her still frozen in shock looking towards her Aniki.

"Aniki?" she said softly a moment later.

"Yes?"

"Why don't we go on a date too?"

He sprayed the water he had been drinking out of his mouth and on the counter, as he swiped away the liquid from his lips. "W-What!?" he sputtered.

"I mean…isn't a date something you do between two persons who like each other? Like, when a boy and a girl want to have fun together, they go on a date?"

"Ehm…that's not actually what a date means, Naruko," he replied carefully. "A date is…when a man and a woman go together and see if they have things in common or things they like with one another, and then if they enjoyed their time spent together it keeps up until they end up marrying."

Better the 'romantic' viewpoint for the girl, really.

"Ah!" she clapped her hands together. "Then Aniki, why don't we get married!?"

Ayame choked, Teuchi nearly drowned face first in one of the ramen pots.

He coughed and nervously laughed. "Naruko…that's…that's not how it works. You're too young, and there's the age difference to consider."

"But…but people who marry like each other very much, right?"

"Well…yes, but it's more of a 'love' than a 'like' and loving someone is…more than liking someone."

"Oh! Then I love you, Aniki! Really, I love you very much!" the fact was she was smiling and saying it like it was normal, thus…he exhaled.

"No, Naruko…Love is…love is saying you want to spend the rest of your life with that person, it's…it's saying you can't live for more than a few days apart from him, that he's always in your thoughts and…and well, it's usually something that comes naturally before you try to make babies."

"Ah…" she seemed to mull it over.

"Neh, Aniki?"

"Yes, Naruko?"

"How do you make babies?"

Calmly, he stood. He looked at Ayame with a piercing glare and then said. _"She's all yours."_

He dashed out leaving behind a cloud of smoke, best than any ninja could possibly fathom to create.

They actually heard him scream even halfway through the village.

Naruko blinked, and then looked at Ayame.

"So, Ayame-Neechan…where do babies come from?"

Ayame blinked. Then she turned to Teuchi.

"Dad? Where do babies come from?"

And Teuchi sweated bullets as he mentally cursed.

"_CURSE YOU HARUNO-SAN! CURSE YOUUUUUUU!"_


	22. Confronting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Two

Naruko blushed every time he looked at her after 'that' dinner at Ichiraku, for the entire Saturday morning. She had even slept in her room after that, meaning that maybe he should have let Teuchi give her the 'talk' beforehand.

He was actually sipping tea while reading the newspaper, when there was a polite knock at the door.

He opened the door, cup of tea in hand, and then was bag-headed and sent elsewhere by force. When they actually removed the bag, he was once more in the torture and interrogation department.

"So, you're going on a date with Anko today again, huh?" Ibiki said calmly. "Last time, we stalled her long enough to get circumstantial information on you," the head of the department said calmly. "This time, we have quite a bit more, like…"

Ibiki moved closer to him, and whispered something.

His eyes widened, and then he looked sideways.

"So…is it true?" Ibiki asked once more.

He bit his lips, and then nodded.

"Very well," the man remarked gruffly. "You know, the two are friends…you wouldn't want anyone to know about that, right?"

He grimaced, and then curtly made a single 'yes' gesture.

"Good," Ibiki clapped his hands against his shoulders. "Then we have no problems: you break Anko's heart, we share the secret."

"Promise?" he asked then.

"On my honour," the scarred man smiled wickedly.

The next instant, he was bagged again and dropped off once more in front of his apartment. They even went as far as buying him another cup, since the old one had crashed on the ground when they had kidnapped him —it even had the price tag still attached to boot!

Calmly, he entered his apartment without betraying his emotional turmoil. He gently held the cup they had given him and then, in front of Naruko's surprised expression, he threw the mug against the wall and watched with satisfaction as it broke in a hundred of pieces.

He breathed and exhaled firmly, squaring his shoulders and then grabbing a broom to swipe away the debris.

"Aniki?" Naruko asked then, slightly frightened.

"Yes, Naruko?" he smiled back at her gently.

"Is everything all right?"

"Peachy," he nodded as he began to hum.

"All right," the girl swallowed nervously, and then dropped it. "EHI! Tonight you go out with your girlfriend, right?"

"I told you, I don't know if we're an item yet," he sighed.

"But who wouldn't be your girlfriend, Aniki!?" Naruko exclaimed. "You're the very best! You're the best-est-est-est Aniki in the world!" she even opened her arms wide as she said that. "Oh, right, Sakura's coming to sleepover at my apartment tonight, and Hinata too."

"Good for you," he remarked.

"Can I take some cup ramen?"

"You bought it to begin with," he replied, "Take as much as you want."

Naruko nodded and then carefully slipped out of his apartment. He wondered for how long the girl would walk as if she were on eggshells. Then again, he supposed for females discovering 'that' was different from males. A male just woke up one morning with the 'rod' to attention and wondered why, or maybe a classmate spoke of 'that' and bam, they knew.

He supposed females worked more on a romantic sight until they found out what 'that' was about.

He prepared and was actually surprised when he didn't see Sakura nor hear her coming into his apartment. It felt suspicious, but he let it go.

He heard a soft knock at the door and went to open it, only to be surprised when he found out it was Anko, wearing a well-fitted Kimono that reminded him…

"Ah! The Tea House?"

Anko chuckled.

"You remembered?"

"You work there par time too?" he asked then, raising an eyebrow.

She snorted. "That's more of a hobby," she linked her arms with his, and then smiled. "Well, are we going to dinner now?"

"Of course," he nodded back, closing the door behind him.

Unknown to him, three extremely determined girls soon began to follow them quietly.

"Hinata, keep your Bakugan active," Naruko said seriously. She was wearing a thick wool baklava, and had a dark black Jumpsuit on for the occasion.

"It's…Byakugan, Naruko," Sakura huffed, holding a flu-mask over her face, a pair of sunglasses and a scarf to cover her hair.

Hinata was wearing her usual clothes, but her face hid behind an Oni mask —which made her very scary in her opinion!

The two adults seemed to be making small talk, but the way the woman was holding on to Naruko's Aniki was horrible! Hinata felt the need to cry: if the woman took the Aniki away from Naruko, then would she have to leave Naruko too? It couldn't stand!

"That wench, flirting with my Onii-sama," Sakura hissed as she muttered dark curses one after the other.

"Ohi, Bandana-man," Naruko said then to a strange looking man who was camouflaged as the wall, with a bandana covering the upper side of his head and he too following the two walking down the road. "Friend or foe?"

"Who wants to know?"

"I do, 'ttebayo!"

Anko's ears perked up, as he too heard a very familiar sound. He was about to turn his head to look behind him, when Anko grabbed the sides of his face and kissed him gently on the lips. "Muh! No looking elsewhere!" she said with a teasing grin.

"Ah, it's just…" he smiled bashfully. "I think I heard…"

"I heard it too: it was a cat."

"A cat?"

"Yeah, you know, one of those _cats_ that would do better to go back home and play with dolls if they don't want an adult to spank them."

Strangely, a cat-masked Anbu suddenly decided it was a way better idea to go back home and cuddle a sick Hayate rather than remain to follow her 'not-so-normal' patrol.

"If you say so," he carefully began to walk again, before asking. "So, what do you usually do at work?"

"Oh, are we fishing for information?"

He blinked. "Just…making conversation, if you want to talk about something else…"

"Aw, I even had a punishment game ready to answer the questions on what I do," Anko pouted. "It required betting clothes and answering true or false."

"We still have to eat dinner."

"Can't we directly skip to the sex?"

"W-Wait, what?" he spluttered out and looked her in disbelief. "No! We're going to eat at the restaurant!"

"You just refused having sex with me," Anko replied. "Are you sure you're not gay? Did you get a good look at these!?" even in a Kimono, she still managed to push her chest slightly forward. "Come on, Kimono-sex, it's the cult fetish of all sane men in Konoha!"

There was a sort of murderous aura forming behind them, as Sakura's eyes lit with purple flames of malice as she cursed beneath her breath. Even Ibiki was scared to remain in close contact, especially because the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki had a face as if she had just 'lost it'. You know, that sort of glazed over eyes that look at you with a half-formed smile before they grab a knife and kill you.

Yeah, _that_ look.

The Oni-mask wearing girl was the worst however. She radiated such a deep pool of rage that it rivalled that of the other perverted stalker.

"She's taking Aniki away," Naruko droned out, her shoulders sagging. Ibiki swallowed nervously. Naruko suddenly blinked, and then smiled.

"Of course!" she clapped her hands excitedly. The next moment Naruko disappeared from in front of them, to appear straight ahead of the couple in question.

He stopped as he stared at the panting Naruko, who then pointed her finger towards Anko.

"You! Do you like Aniki!?"

Anko blinked, as he actually wanted to disappear.

"Of course!" she smiled then, "Got a problem with it?"

"No!" Naruko smiled, "Then you're One-san now! When are you two going to marry? Can I be the maid of honour? Is there going to be a cake? Eh? Can it be a ramen cake!?"

His eyebrows rose to reach the top of his forehead. "Naruko…"

Anko just snorted at first, and then she laughed. She laughed and brought both arms to hold her stomach as she nearly keeled over.

"Uh? What are you laughing for?"

"AHAH! Brat! I'm too young to think about that!"

"Wait a moment! You're…" Naruko frowned for a second, "AH! Teuchi-Jiji said it too! Some people 'fool around' with others, use them and then leave them! You're that type, right!? You're the worst!" she took on a fighting stance. "Let go of my Aniki then, you…"

He sighed and grabbed Naruko by the neck, before making a 'one moment' gesture to Anko. He pulled her out from the middle of the street, with her putting up a half decent struggle —but he was righteously infuriated, and thus his strength redoubled.

"Naruko," he said then calmly. "Aren't you supposed to be having a sleepover right now?"

"Welllllll…" Naruko looked elsewhere.

Suddenly, he had half a feeling that Naruko was just the tip of the Iceberg.

"Sakura."

"Yes, Onii-sama?" the girl appeared within a second.

"Sakura…" he growled. "You two! You left Hinata back home alone?"

"Actually…" Naruko turned her gaze towards the street and then paled. "No! Hinata! Abort plan! Abort!"

"What are you talking about Nar—"

He spun around just in time to see an oni-masked girl charging forward with a bucket filled with water.

_FOR THE LOVE I SHARE WITH NARUKO! DISAPPEAR!_ Hinata thought strongly as she flung the ice-cold water against the kimono-wearing woman.

Anko sidestepped the jet, stuck her foot out and watched impassively as the brat fell down on the ground.

Genin versus Tokubetsu Jounin. Tokubetsu Jounin Wins.

Anko then took the empty bucket and placed it over the Genin's head, before ramming it a few time with the back of one of her hidden kunai, to make the girl 'dizzy'. Then she dropped her on the ground and smiled towards his direction. He could swear there were red words floating in the air reading…

_Fatality_…

_You Win!_

"Anyway, Naruko, go back home," he said then. "Don't you have a mission tomorrow anyway?"

Then he returned to Anko, bowing profusely as he apologized. As Naruko watched her Aniki leave with the woman…

She felt a twinge of something in her chest.

It was…

It sort-of hurt.

Maybe…maybe she could ask her Aniki out on a date too?

Unknown to him, Anko had flashed a set of precise Anbu signs to all of her 'followers' which basically read something like this.

_IF you follow us, I will personally castrate you all and make sure you eat hotdogs for breakfast tomorrow!_

The roofs and the streets looked nearly half-deserted afterwards.

The next morning, he awoke with an extremely relaxed expression as he gazed at the ceiling. It was a good day, there was a soft form next to him, and this time around, he clearly remembered…wait.

There was a badly covered hole in his apartment.

Last night, he had conveniently forgotten it existed.

That didn't mean it actually didn't exist.

The three girls in the nearby apartment hadn't slept for a single instant.

Sakura was completely red-faced, twitching in a pool of her own blood that had gushed out of her nose in thick streams…

Naruko had a haunted look, having tried her best to fall asleep by using two pillows to cover her ears.

Hinata on the other hand…

She had the Byakugan active because Naruko hadn't told her to stop using it.

She had seen everything.

So…

So…

She should ask her father what the deal was with the cabbage patch then.

Hiashi Hyuga suddenly froze, feeling a dark chill settle on his spine.

He remembered that chill.

It was the chill of 'the talk'. He had done it once, proudly using the cabbage patch excuse on his daughter.

This time however…

Oh, this time he felt as if the shinigami was sipping tea right next to him.


	23. Standing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Three

Naruko did not come over for breakfast. Anko on the other hand remained. They made small talk, and then she left with a wink and a smile. He sighed and was just about to continue his Sunday morning chores when he heard a knock at the door.

This time, he narrowed his eyes and moved to the side of the door, before carefully swinging it open. The moment he saw the blur of the black bagging Anbu enter he slammed the frying pan into their face.

There was a strong 'THONK' noise as the Anbu fell flat on its back.

He snorted and twirled the frying pan.

"Predictable," he said. The next instant he was of course disarmed and face-bagged by the Anbu's colleague. He cursed under his breath once more when he found himself again brought to the Torture and Interrogation department.

Really, this was starting to get old!

"Are you planning on getting a bigger apartment?" Ibiki asked him calmly.

"Eh?"

"Of course, there is the marriage to consider."

"W-What!?"

Ibiki made a fierce smile.

"I'm sure the dating period could be of—"

Then the door of the interrogation room barrelled open with a loud noise, and Anko entered fuming and yelling.

"WHAT THE HELL!? Ibiki! I warned you! I warned all of you!" she said to the nearby Anbu who were watching. "I don't need any fucking babysitters!"

"Anko, language," Ibiki chided the woman. Anko blinked.

He, on the other hand…

Ah…so that was why Anko reminded him of Naruko.

He looked towards Ibiki and then understood.

"Ah…Anko? We were just talking, really," he said slowly.

"Do you usually talk strapped to a chair in one of the least known torture chambers of the department?" Anko queried back, crossing her arms over her chest. "Because if it's like that, then I want in on the kink."

He spluttered. "Not like that!"

"Yes, we were just…talking, and they were about to get some tea, yes?" Ibiki said towards the Anbu, who nodded and left quickly.

"Uhm…" Anko raised an eyebrow. Ibiki sweated, and then untied his restraints. He massaged his wrists and sighed.

"It's all right, Anko, really," he smiled at her briefly, and she pouted for a second.

"Fine!" the girl exclaimed. "But we're going out this afternoon, understood lover-boy?"

He blinked. "Yes?"

"Good! Four o'clock, in front of the cinema: don't you dare be late!"

Then she was out. He turned to look at Ibiki, who actually exhaled in relief.

"Difficult to let them go when they grow up, huh?"

"Think you can relate?" Ibiki deadpanned.

"I basically grew Naruko up alone," he shrugged back. "I did find some similarities between the two…and you just confirmed it to me."

"You know of Orochimaru, right?" Ibiki said carefully.

"The traitor sannin, right?"

"Yeah, Anko was his apprentice. The man took her and nine other kids out of Konoha, and she was the only one who came back alive. The girl was an orphan, and she _venerated_ the man. The moment he betrayed Konoha, she took it the hardest but remained loyal. I was the one in charge of checking her loyalties. We had a few sessions and then she just kept coming back." Ibiki shrugged as he grabbed a cup of tea that had appeared from nowhere. "She became the Torture and Interrogation mascot after that, and then she started working here."

"I see," he replied. "I saw the parallels with Naruko," he grimaced slightly as he grabbed his own teacup. He took a hesitant sip and then widened his eyes briefly. "This is good."

"Course it is, we get it from the Hokage's personal supplies."

He sputtered for a moment. "You steal this from the Hokage?" he choked out.

"No, we just take a loan," Ibiki remarked with a grin. "I must say however…you swung a frying pan at an Anbu, those were some pretty reflexes."

He glanced away. "Well…I eventually do learn the lesson."

He felt sleepy.

"Of course," Ibiki nodded. "Which is why we sometime take a subtler approach when needed."

His eyelids dropped slowly.

"You…laced…the tea."

"See you soon," and then Ibiki's smile was the last thing he saw, before falling asleep.

When he woke up, it was in his bed and the clock was just then chiming the lunch hour.

He exhaled…he just hoped everything would settle down.

It turned out it didn't, because in the next weeks the Chuunin Exams were all people talked about —that and his relationship with Anko.

He had the feeling it was more of a 'sex and go' thing with the woman, but then again he was doing well in his own opinion. The fact he kept on receiving 'invitations' to the Torture and Interrogation department on a weekly basis was something he'd live without, but he couldn't have everything in this life.

One thing, however, he noticed.

Naruko's presence, or lack thereof. The girl no longer came around for breakfast, and if it weren't for the dwindling supply of Cup Ramen in his cupboard, he doubted he'd even know she was eating. Of course, it simply could be that they were all training hard for the Chuunin Exams.

"You know," Anko said with a smirk, as they were at an outdoor café near the centre of Konoha. "I'm going to be one of the proctors for the exam."

"Really?"

"Yeah! I can't even tell you what it's about, but Ibiki's doing the first test," she smiled. "I'm doing the second, so the kids don't stand a chance this year around."

He grinned back. "I heard the rookies of this generation are pretty good."

"You're just taking the brat's side," Anko pouted. "How's she by the way?"

He glanced sideways. "I don't know." He exhaled. "She's not talking to me."

Anko quickly ate a stick of dango, before smirking. "Aw, how cute: she'd doing the precious. If she survives Ibiki, don't worry: I'll set her straight."

"You would?"

"Course I would," she rolled her eyes. "Can't have good sex with a partner who's absent-minded because his sister doesn't talk to him," she narrowed her eyes. "You aren't a siscon, are you?"

He sputtered. "What? No!"

"Good! So…" she smiled. "Want to get rid of the clothes elsewhere?"

He raised an eyebrow. "You know it's still day?"

"So?"

"I know that some believe that all dates should end in 'glory' but…what am I, to you, exactly?"

Anko stilled. She looked nervous. "Look…let's not put feelings in this, all right? This…it's just good company and sex."

"I see," he grimaced. He gritted his teeth slightly. Then he swallowed a retort and opened his eyes again. "Then we can remain as friends if you'd like."

She blinked. "Wait. No, no! I'm not— Oh that came out wrong, didn't it? I mean…argh! Look…" she fumbled around. "It's not the sex with the good company, because you're a bit mediocre in bed that is…it's the good company with the sex. I mean…you're good company and…argh," she brought both hands to her hair. "You're not making this easy to explain!"

"I understand perfectly," he made a small bow. "Well…if you need someone to talk with, my door's always open."

Then he stood up, paid and left.

Of course, the next minute twenty-seven Anbu, two Jounin and three Tokubetsu Jounin kidnapped and carried him straight in the Torture and Interrogation department.

Where Ibiki waited, looking at him with the sort of smile that promised pain.

He looked back at him, holding his gaze.

And then, with a sigh, Ibiki acquiesced.

That was the first time he did something extremely stupid.

It wouldn't be the last…by a long shot.


	24. Returning

The Boy in the Park

Chapter 24

His life returned normal for the most part. He still had the feeling of being watched, but now it was far less intense. One night, he decided it was time to face the bull by the horns.

He stood in wait in the room, his eyes locked to the 'hole' that connected his apartment to Naruko's. He was going to catch the girl on the act and have a long talk with her. He had no doubts the girl went either during the morning or during the night —she could be quiet whenever she wanted to.

Therefore, he waited for the night, and then for the cover of the hole to silently move aside as the girl crept in a step at the time. He looked for an instant at her general tense frame and sighed, startling the girl who actually looked at him with wide eyes.

"Naruko."

"A-Aniki?" she hazarded. "D-Did I wake you up?"

She looked around like a frightened deer.

"Your Chuunin exam is tomorrow isn't it?" he asked then, gesturing for her to come closer as he stood and turned on the lights of the kitchen.

"H-How do you know?"

"I know many things," he said with a sort of old sensei-like tone he had taken from a film. "Now sit, I'll have the ramen prepared."

"W-Won't that scary lady be angry at you?" Naruko asked softly.

"Why?" he replied.

"S-She said nothing?"

"About what?" he pressed on, perplexed.

"You and I…I mean, what of Hinata trying to drench her and…and everything else and," she babbled for a moment, as his face turned more and more confused.

"Naruko, calm down," he said moving quickly and holding her shoulders with his hands to calm the young girl down, getting down on one knee in front of her. "Take a deep breath, and tell me what the problem is. Why have you been avoiding me until now?"

"I…I couldn't, I mean…what if the scary lady didn't like you hanging with me or me hanging with you and…well, I didn't want to ruin your chances and," her voice was softly trailing off as she grew more agitated with every passing breath. "I didn't want to be a burden…"

He blinked once, then realization dawned and he exhaled slowly.

"Naruko?"

"Y-yes?"

"You're a stupid worrywart," he nodded sagely, before firmly head locking the girl and proceeding to turn her scalp red with a triple-deluxe drill method. Naruko actually fought like the devil possessed and screamed cries of 'affront'.

"Anikiiiiii!" she whined.

"Naruko!" he retorted with a huff letting the girl go. "There's a difference between being a burden and stalking someone! It's rude to interrupt dates, but it's not rude to be friends with someone who has a girlfriend, and it certainly doesn't make you a burden!"

"B-But the scary lady had breasts!" Naruko whined. "I don't!" she cupped her chest. "I mean…maybe they're growing?"

He sweat dropped. "What do breasts have to do with this?"

"Sakura said it had to be breasts," Naruko replied. "She said that as long as a woman has breasts, a man will fall for her."

"That's not all there is in love relationships, Naruko," he deadpanned. "Beauty can only go so far…"

"Yeah," Naruko rolled her eyes. "Right."

"No, really."

"Keep saying that, Aniki."

"Did you spend all the time with Sakura recently?"

"Duh! We're going to the Chuunin exams tomorrow, Aniki! We trained! We even met some creepy dudes from Sand and that Konohamaru brat worsened things with them and…" she blinked. "Oh right! I have a follower now, Aniki! He calls me One-san too!"

She seemed oddly pleased by that.

"Please don't start a Yakuza, Naruko," he said calmly. "Konoha would not survive." The water began to boil and he stood up to grab a cup of instant ramen, before plopping it down in front of a pouting Naruko and pouring the hot water inside.

"Aniki!" Naruko pouted, before opening the chopsticks and starting to blow on the steaming ramen. "How're things going with the scary lady?" she asked between bites.

"Swallow before talking," he chided her, grabbing a napkin and cleaning a smudge on her cheek —something which extremely annoyed Naruko every time he did it, but that he did anyway.

"So?"

"She wasn't looking for a serious relationship, so I suggested we remained as friends," he replied carefully. "I haven't been seeing her for a while now."

Albeit he did occasionally receive glares in the streets from a few shinobi he never met before.

"AH! I told ya Aniki!" Naruko exclaimed with a triumphant gaze. "She was just using you!"

He shook his head. "No," he sighed. "She just wasn't interested in anything serious, there's a difference."

Naruko pouted, "Why? Love is beautiful, right?"

He actually felt his heart melt at such a cheesy line…before he cleared his throat.

"Yes, but some simply have reasons they don't value it. They can be good reasons or bad reasons…"

"What is a good reason to not love, Aniki?" Naruko frowned.

"Well, if your previous love hurt you, then it's difficult to trust again," he said slowly. The girl blinked.

"That's stupid! If you don't love then how can you find someone better to forget about the one that hurt you?"

He looked at Naruko as if the girl had grown a second head.

"Naruko?"

"Yeah, Aniki?"

"Did you just have a great idea?"

Naruko's face planted itself against the table as she sweat-dropped.

"Anikiiiii," Naruko whined, her cheeks red. "I always have great ideas! I'm great 'ttebayo!"

"Yes, of course," he chuckled. He ruffled her hair gently. "You're my great Imouto, right?"

She 'thunked' her head against the side of his chest and sighed, the ramen cup empty. She began to purr as he kept on scratching her gently as if she were a cat. Naruko fell asleep within mere minutes, a happy and content smile on her face.

He actually began to think about buying a ball of yarn and seeing if Naruko instinctively would play with it while being patted on the head.

The mental image of moe-ness was so strong, he had to take a deep calming breath to steady his heart. He slowly lifted the lithe body of the girl up, and dropped her on his bed once more before sighing.

Well, he was back to the sofa, but he did feel more light spirited now that everything was back to normal.

How long, he wondered, would this peace last?


	25. Snapping

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Five

"Crap, I'm late!" Naruko's scream woke him up, as he blinked and realized the girl was still in his apartment. He yawned and stretched, before looking with an amused look at Naruko fretting about with water and preparing herself a cup of instant ramen for breakfast. "Going to be late, late!" she hurriedly ate, before dashing to leave.

"Naruko!" she stilled in mid-movement, looking back at him.

"Your equipment is in your apartment," he pointed out. "And…" he moved closer, before giving a tight hug to the girl. "I believe in you, so ace the exam all right?"

Naruko actually let out steam from her ears, as she turned red. He raised an eyebrow at such a display but said nothing as the girl blurred out of sight and through the hole. He smiled wistfully as he opened the door of his apartment, just in time to see Naruko dash out of hers, stop in mid-run and then turn around to charge at him.

She grabbed him by the jacket he wore, pulling him down before giving him a light kiss on the cheek.

"I'm going to become Chuunin in no time, Aniki! Dattebayo!" and then she dashed off once more.

He chuckled. Well, he had the day off because the academy was being used as the site of the exam, and then he knew that for five days at least, he wouldn't be seeing Naruko at all —the second part lasted five days apparently.

So he re-entered his apartment, and went back to sleep.

There was a soft knock at his door. He sighed, stretched and went over to open it, looking at the clock in the meantime. One minute had barely passed —had Naruko come back already?

He opened the door and then stilled.

"Sloppy as usual."

He gritted his teeth.

"Hello, Mebuki-san."

"You are not going to invite me in?"

"Sorry, but I am not," he replied. "What is it, now?"

"Sakura is participating in the Chuunin exams, and I remember them from my days," the woman added slowly. "Since, apparently, you have some form of stupid belief that the dead last of the class will not hinder your sister, I'd like to know what makes you think that."

"If you've come here only to insult Naruko…"

"No, I've come here to ask you: what makes you believe she won't weight down her team? The last of the Uchiha was the rookie of the year, and Sakura the prime kunoichi of her class. Where does your trust stem from? She failed her exams thrice for Kami's sake; the Hokage shouldn't even have let her graduate!"

At that outburst, his eyes grew colder.

"I understand you're worried about Sakura, but Naruko isn't the dead last any longer, and I trust her…because _someone_ has to."

"Listen to yourself! You're just taking this as a duty! Do you think this is going to make you special somewhat? That girl, she's going to grow and forget about you. She's going to discard you once she gets what she wants, you know that demons…"

He closed the door in her face.

She slammed it down, making him move backwards to avoid the falling debris. "I'm not done talking!"

"No, but I am," he hissed curtly.

"You don't get a say in the matter!" she barked back. "Sakura's going to risk her life and…"

"And you were the one who sent her to the Academy!" he accused her.

"Only because she wanted to follow your dream of becoming a shinobi!" Mebuki barked back.

"She clearly didn't state it as such," he retorted.

"A mother knows these things!"

"Yeah, right!" he snorted. "So you've come here to insult Naruko and tell me how it's my fault Sakura's taking a dangerous exam?"

"YES!"

He stared at her in disbelief. "Leave."

"I won't! You still haven't answered me! What if Sakura dies because of the demon brat?"

"NARUKO. IS. NOT. A. DEMON!" he roared back at her, advancing in close to try to cajole her to get out. The next moment he tasted the ground as his mother had pinned him down. He could feel the blood coming down from a crack on his lips, as he tried to free himself from the steel-like grip.

"She's a demon, and probably she'll come out of the exam unscathed. Kami only knows how she'll manage. I'm not going to bury my only child because of her!"

There. That hurt.

"Of course," he muttered. "So what do you want?" he choked out as he felt the pressure on his arm increase. Did she want to snap it clean?

"I want to know my daughter is not going to die because of your pet demon, that's what I want to know."

He snarled at that, trying to get free once more.

Then, it happened.

There was a snap, and he howled in pain.

Mebuki actually let go then, getting back up and looking at him shocked as he cradled his broken arm. She looked genuinely scared and worried for him, but now…now it was simply too late.

"Get. Out." He hissed between tears. "Get out of here and never come back!"

He felt so powerless, and the broken arm didn't help.

"I…Maybe the hospital—"

"GET OUT OF HERE!" he yelled at her, making her take a step backwards.

"Look, I'm…"

"GET. OUT!" he roared at her one last time, clutching the broken arm and hissing.

Mebuki looked at him as she slowly walked away, before disappearing in a flicker out of his apartment. He sobbed. He began to cry as he clutched on to his broken limb.

Life wasn't fair, but what he done to deserve this?

He didn't ask to be born as a civilian. He didn't ask to be left behind. He didn't ask to suffer through this.

He didn't ask for Haruno Mebuki to take him in, orphan as he was after the Kyuubi's attack.

He didn't ask for any of that…so why did he have to suffer so?

He slowly stood up on wobbling legs, and then ground his teeth. With his working hand, he moved to where the first aid kit was. The break was clean, and as a teacher he had been taught the basics of first aid and bone setting —ninja academy, ninja kids, ninja wounds.

He had to get his arm still before walking towards the hospital. He ground his teeth as he grabbed onto the gauze, letting it pass behind his neck before biting down on a napkin.

Within moments, he lifted his broken arm with a choked out noise of pain and dropped it once more on the impromptu hoister.

He walked out of his apartment. The hospital wasn't too far…just half an hour of walking.

He should call them, get an Ambulance of sorts but…

However, they'd ask questions on the broken door. He closed his eyes for a moment. This was the last favour he did to his mother…no, to Mebuki Haruno.

Beneath the sharp blue sky…he trudged on.


	26. Guarding

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Six

Wearing a cast was starting to trouble him. The fact his left arm had been the one to snap however made it tolerable. By the end of the first day, he had received enough signatures on it that the nurse asked if he wanted another one —just to keep up with all the people he knew.

The fun thing was, the majority of the names were Anbu masks belonging to the Torture and Interrogation department, and quite a lot had words like 'Hope to kidnap you again soon' and 'Next time, you won't get me with the frying pan' and such.

The second fun thing was that he _hadn't_ seen when they actually wrote on it —he understood they were ninja and whatnot, but really, some had written really long prosaic words like 'We Wish Thee Well' and so on.

He hadn't actually thought he had that many people as 'friends' but maybe…maybe it was the Reverse Stockholm Syndrome? Where the kidnapper likes the kidnapped?

He shuddered at the thought, before inserting the keys into the lock of his house. Five days had come and gone, and Naruko had yet to return. He hoped everything had gone well.

He was just about to enter, when a Jounin flickered near him, one with silver hair and his forehead protector acting as an eye-patch.

"Yoh!" Kakashi said with a bright eye-smile. "The Hokage wants to see you, hold tight!"

"Wh—"

The next moment, he actually _saw_ what happened when he was 'kidnapped'.

In a blur, the Jounin sped up and reached for the rooftops, before outright ignoring some basic physics laws like attrition or gravity, and finally reaching inside the Hokage's office from the open window.

He found himself looking first in the eyes of the Hokage, then in those of what looked like _half_ of the Anbu corps. He felt slightly out of place…just slightly.

He blinked once. By the time he opened his eyes again, his cast filled with writings, which varied from 'LET THE FIRE OF YOUTH HEAL YOU FASTER' to 'Icha-Icha will soothe your wounds'. And he didn't know half of the people in there.

"Hokage-sama?" he asked nervously.

"Oh, Haruno-kun, take a seat. How is your arm doing?" the Hokage replied with a small smile. "I heard it was an accident, right?"

"Y-Yes," he nodded quickly as a chair appeared right behind him.

"I didn't take you for a clumsy person, Haruno-kun," the Sandaime smiled. It was that sort of smile that subtly implied: 'I know that you know that I know, so stop bullshitting me before I do something you might regret'. He just swallowed nervously.

"Accidents happen," he replied slowly. His eyes trailed around the room. Really, why the concentration of shinobi?

"Of course they do," the Sandaime smiled. "Of course," he nodded once more. "Anyway, I have called you here because you are directly related to the problem we have at hand," he said carefully. "During the second part of the test, team Seven was attacked…"

"Naruko's all right?" he asked suddenly, before biting his tongue.

"Yes, yes do not worry: all three of them are fine," Hiruzen replied with a chuckle. "No, the problem is who attacked them: Orochimaru of the sannin."

He swallowed and paled. "O-Orochimaru?"

"Indeed, my wayward student has become interested in the last of the Uchiha, and thus targeted the team."

His eyes widened in disbelief. "The sannin? He…are they in the hospital?"

"Yes," Hiruzen nodded before adding quickly, "But fret not, they're just going through a regular set of check-ups after the second test. Mitarashi-san intervened just in time to hold much of Orochimaru's attention. However since both Naruko and Sasuke passed the end of the second test, they will be participating in the finals which will take place one month from now."

He looked at the Hokage with a perplexed expression. Why was he there then? The man seemed to catch on, because he then added.

"I found it best to talk to everyone at the same time, thus the reason for this meeting. Jiraiya will return to Konoha soon, and while he will take care of Naruko's protection, I want to assign Sasuke's safety to Kakashi Hatake and a team of Anbu. There are a few compounds in Konoha where you can set up a training ground, Kakashi," the Sandaime looked towards the silver haired ninja. "You will extensively train and gauge Sasuke's loyalty to Konoha."

Kakashi nodded.

"The rest of you will increase their daily patrols. We have foreign dignitaries coming within the next weeks, and the Daimyo court itself: we cannot let a diplomatic incident happen."

The rest of the Jounin and Anbu nodded, and the Hokage quickly dismissed them before standing up and walking towards him. He swallowed nervously once more, as the Sandaime stopped close to him enough to see his eyes twinkle once. Clear sign the old shinobi was probably going to murder someone.

"This being a shinobi village, there are clear laws on what shinobi can and cannot do against civilians. I looked over your hospital records, and except for a black eye when you were younger," there was some sort of strain in his voice as he said that, "Which is coincidental with you leaving home," again, the strain was there. "There was nothing. You reported you slipped and broke your arm against the table, right?"

He nodded meekly.

"But your table isn't broken," Hiruzen said calmly. "And unless you were an old crone, slipping on a table would not break your arm's bone that cleanly. No, that was done with a pinning move taught to shinobi, so I have to ask who did that, and if you're hiding something then for what reason."

"H-Hokage-sama, really…it was nothing…"

Hiruzen exhaled. "You must understand that with Orochimaru rampant…I just need to know if you were intimidated or coerced into doing something, Haruno-kun…"

"Ah, no, no," he shook his head quickly. "It was nothing like that, really…it was probably my fault anyway, since I st— slipped."

"Oh? So you struggled," Hiruzen nodded once. "I will take your word on it and mind you, if you do not wish to accuse anyone, then I will not press charges…"

The Sandaime looked out of the window. "But a crime is a crime. To let it go unpunished is wrong."

He didn't reply, but simply looked sideways in pain. "I kept you long enough, Haruno-kun," Hiruzen said with a smile then. "Naruko should be in room two-hundred and seven at the Konoha hospital."

"Thank you, Hokage-sama."

To say he dashed out of there would be to minimize the speed he used. In doing so however he missed the slight nod the Hokage gave to a corner of the room, where an Anbu operative nodded back.

He'd have a bodyguard…and he wouldn't even know about it.


	27. Thanking

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Seven

The hospital was neat and smelled of disinfectant as he walked through the white corridors. He had the unsettling feeling of being under watch, and it didn't seem as if it was fading. Slowly, he reached the intended door.

"_WHO ARE YOU CALLING OLD HAG, YOU BRAT!?_" that was Anko's voice all right.

"_I DID, YOU SAGGY BREASTED HAG!_" Naruko's voice screamed right back.

"Please…calm down," the he heard from within, coming from the nurse probably.

"Anko, stop harassing the Genin," another female voice said.

"But Kurenai!" Anko whined. "She started it!"

"You're a Jounin, act like one."

"I'm a Tokubetsu Jounin! I'm special, my rank says so!" Anko cheerfully exclaimed. "My specialty is harassing Genin after all!"

"_YOUR SPECIALTY IS HAVING SAGGY TITS, OLD HAG!_" Naruko screamed once more.

"_NARUKO_!" this time it was Sakura screaming. "Stop calling the _perverted thirty years old cradle robber_ an old hag: it's unbecoming of _a young and fresh woman_ in the prime of her youth and beauty!"

"I feel more pissed off at plank-board over there now," Anko's voice became a low growl. "And did nobody teach you of the 'half plus seven rule'? I'm twenty-four, he's _twenty_. It's not cradle robbing!"

"Anko, please stop," Kurenai sighed.

He stood frozen behind the door. He didn't want to enter all of a sudden.

"Wait, I'm…thirteen," there went Naruko's voice. "So…when I'm…" he could actually imagine the girl counting with her fingers. "When I'm twenty, Aniki will be twenty-seven. So…thirteen plus seven makes twenty!"

"Twenty-one and half to nit-pick, Naruko," Sakura corrected her. Why did he have the feeling Sakura had made that calculation with years of advance?

"Oh? And why would he go with a flat-chested girl like you?"

"_BECAUSE MY TITS DON'T SAG, OLD HAG!_"

"_YOU DON'T HAVE THEM TO BEGIN WITH!_"

He was actually half-embarrassed and half-torn between the desire to run and hide or just go in and feign ignorance of the entire ordeal. He had thought catfights happened only in the Icha-Icha series, not in _reality_.

He exhaled and then slid the door, entering just before they could start another round of insults. He saw a raven-haired woman with red eyes sitting on a chair near Anko, while the woman in question was growling and throwing daggers with her eyes to Naruko, who was extremely close to her and actually 'batting' foreheads.

Sakura was also throwing glares towards Anko, while Sasuke stood in a corner with a look that was a mixture between shock and amusement.

There actually was the start of a grin on the boy's face.

There was silence the moment he entered. Anko assumed a sedated position in the next instant, placing herself beneath the sheets of the hospital bed and actually starting to moan and sweat slightly, as if she was grievously injured.

"Ah…I'm so, so sick…"

"W-WHAT!?" Naruko spluttered out looking from her to him, before widening her eyes at the implication. She exaggeratedly brought her hand to her forehead and rolled her eyes backwards, before muttering. "I feel so weak, Anikiiii…"

"Onii-sama," Sakura said between sudden wracks of cough, "I'm horribly…" she seemed lost on what 'horrible' thing had befallen her, and so her voice trailed off as she continued to cough.

He sighed and then began to walk closer.

The next instant, that is the next second, all three 'fakers' realized he actually had a broken arm in a cast.

The change was instantaneous.

"_ANIKI! WHO DID THIS!?_" Naruko was the first to yell and jump ahead, stopping short of barrelling against his broken arm.

"Onii-sama! What happened!?" Sakura was next, worry etched on her face. He nervously chuckled as he took a step back.

Anko simply stopped faking being harmed, and merely asked with a bright smile. "Was it Ibiki?"

"No," he said quickly.

"Aw," Anko pouted. "Someone I know?"

Ibiki suddenly exhaled in relief, as if he had just avoided some horrible fate.

"No one," he sighed back. "Really, I just slipped and fell," he added carefully. "Should have fallen head first," he chuckled.

Sakura seemed satisfied by the answer, assuming a thoughtful gaze before muttering to herself something that went like 'Nurse outfit', 'bed', 'medications', 'bedpan' and that had the pink haired girl turn red.

Naruko just seemed torn for a moment, scanning his cast. He sighed and used his free hand to ruffle the girl's head. "So," Naruko began to purr as he kept on gently patting her, "I'd like to thank you, Anko," he added then with a small smile.

Anko blinked once. "_What_."

She actually _squawked_ that out.

"The Hokage told me you intervened against Orochimaru," he softly added. "If it weren't for you, I don't know what would have happened to Naruko or Sakura so…thank you."

He made a small bow in her direction.

Anko's face was describable in simply one word.

_Priceless_.

The purple haired Kunoichi actually blushed scarlet to the tip of her hair as she coughed awkwardly and averted her gaze.

"Ah…Ah that's…Really…I…" she stammered out, before starting to fidget with her fingers. "I mean…It was…"

"Hey!" Naruko pouted. "I fought Orochimaru too! He had this _really_ giant snake, you know? And he ate me with it! However I was all 'hell no!' and so I used Kage Bunshin to get out of there! The snake exploded and it was glorious and—"

"I did my part too!" Sakura said then, pushing with her shoulder Naruko aside. He actually raised an eyebrow: Sakura's hair was short now, as if she had roughly cut it. "When both Naruko and Sasuke fainted, I had to protect them Onii-sama! So I created a lot of traps and used them to stave off the enemies! There was this Oto team who wanted to fight Sasuke, but he was knocked out and so…"

"She was about to die when I intervened," Sasuke butted in then, his teeth gritted. He stepped out from his corner, and locked eyes with him.

"Then I owe you my thanks too," he remarked. "Thanks for looking over these two brats for me," he smiled, and was rewarded with a gruff grunt of acknowledgement.

"That's Duckbutt-speech for 'I'm glad you're the most awesome Aniki ever'." Naruko quipped in, earning herself a heated glare from Sasuke.

He chuckled at that, but as he did, his gaze lingered towards the woman who had remained quiet until that moment.

Kurenai Yuhi's face was like that of someone who had swallowed a bitter pill, as her own red eyes locked with his. There was an awkward moment of silence, before the Jounin in question coughed and stood up.

"Well, Anko…I have to go," she left quickly after that, not bothering to spare another glance back. She left just as another woman entered the room, one that made his hair rise even more.

The two women in question looked at one another for a second, one nervously making a bow gesture —Kurenai— to the other who merely snorted —Mebuki— and then they left it at that.

He just looked at them for a moment more, before slowly turning to leave too.

"Aniki! Wait, I'm coming with you!" Naruko exclaimed behind him as he was already walking away. "Aniki! Wait!"

She followed him as he firmly left the hospital, walking silently towards his apartment.

"Aniki?" Naruko asked, this time actually worried. "Ehi…Aniki?"

Naruko looked at the face her brother in all but blood sported, and words died in her mouth.

Her Aniki was _crying_ silently.

Whoever had done that, her mind decided…

_Was going to pay._


	28. Discovering

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Eight

"So…Ibiki?" Anko smiled sweetly as she looked over the head of the Torture and Interrogation department. "Who did it?"

Ibiki began to sweat.

"Who did what?"

"Who broke the arm?"

"I don't follow…"

Strangely, Ibiki felt extremely compelling looking over to the coffee machine.

"Come on…I know you have an idea…just tell me, I promise whoever it was of the department I'll go soft on them."

"No snake summoning?"

"None," Anko promised. "Konoha scout promise!"

"You weren't in the Konoha scouts," Ibiki deadpanned.

"Just tell me, pretty please? I fought off the big bad bastard…you'll tell me, right? I need to distract myself…"

"The subject arrived in the hospital at a quarter past nine, his version was that of a broken arm. Backtracking and crosschecking with the Anbu assigned to safeguarding Naruko —that thus followed the girl when she left— this," he said handing her over a scroll, "is the list of people who went in the opposite direction. We used the mind recollection technique to get the information out, and I actually called in a favour Inoichi owned me."

Anko smiled. "I knew I could count on you, Ibiki!

She began to read with a bright and happy smile, before frowning and then looking back sharply at Ibiki.

Ibiki held the gaze for a moment more, keeping his demeanour as calm as possible. "Hide the needle in the haystack of the neighbour," Anko growled. "You taught me that trick. So, where's the _real_ list?"

"There isn't one," he sighed.

"So you know who did it," Anko accused him. "Why aren't you telling me the name, huh?" she suddenly blinked. "It wasn't the brat, was it? No, because if you tell me it was the Ky—"

"No!" Ibiki hurriedly said. "No, nothing of the sort. Look Anko, he doesn't want to press charges. It's water under the bridge…really."

Anko pointed an accusing finger at Ibiki. "I'm deciding that, understood?"

"Why? He left you, didn't he?" Ibiki asked back, crossing his arms over his chest.

"He _thanked_ me," Anko muttered. "The only other guys who ever do it are you folks of the department, when I crack a tough nut or bring extra dango to the guys doing the night shift. He wasn't obligated to. He did it anyway; heck…he even thanked Duckbutt-Uchiha."

Ibiki's eyebrows rose. "Duckbutt-Uchiha?"

"The brat knows her nicknames," Anko admitted. "Back to us however…the name."

"Listen Anko, we both know you won't stop at something bland, and there are laws in effect…"

"The. Name."

Ibiki exhaled, and then tightened his lips.

"You aren't playing the tortured shinobi, Ibiki!" Anko growled. "Give me the name damn it!"

Ibiki remained quiet.

"Fine," Anko growled. "Then I'll get it straight from the source," the purple haired kunoichi said with a smirk. "See ya!"

Ibiki watched her leave and sighed. Well, at least it wasn't his problem any longer.

Naruko was worried. Of course, she wasn't worried for the exam —or the fact her sensei had decided she'd train with a young pervert, who then had become an older pervert. No, Naruko was worried for her Aniki. She knew her Aniki always smiled, and most of the time he kept on smiling even when things went tough.

She wasn't stupid. She knew he sometimes worked off-hours in the middle of the night to make end meets when he didn't have enough money for the bills, and she knew that when his bills were high it generally was also her fault. She also knew that every time she forced him to accept her share, he just placed it in a jar beneath the sink and left it at that.

Her aniki was _kind_ like that, so it had _hurt_ to see him cry.

She wanted to know why, but while Sakura worked on one choice —her mother— she needed to find out about the red-eyed woman. She knew her name was 'Kurenai' but more than that…

"Hinata?" she asked in the middle of the street. The next instant Hinata popped out from an alleyway, as silent as a cat. Naruko sweat-dropped. She hadn't really expected the girl to be following her. "Can you find someone for me?"

"Y-Yes Naruko-chan!"

Hinata was extremely pumped up —that was good, she would need it by the time they found out if that woman was to blame...because if she was, oh, Naruko had a few pranks involving itching powder in unmentionables spots.

"She's a red haired woman, with raven hair. She wears some sort of white thing with bandages, and her name's Kurenai."

Hinata blinked.

"You mean…my sensei?"

Naruko blinked back.

"Your sensei? Good! That's good! Do you know where she lives!?"

Hinata hesitantly nodded.

"Well then, let's go Hinata!"

"W-Why are you looking for her, Naruko-chan?"

"I need to ask her sum'thing," Naruko remarked humming to herself. If Hinata's sensei was the reason her Aniki had cried, she was going to start with itching powder, move her way up to rattlesnakes, and then in between throw a few can of paints to seal the deal. Considering her dress was made to resemble bandages…maybe she could get some water on it?

Or cover it in salt or sugar…

Sugar for the ants or salt for the itchiness…

Decisions…

Hinata watched Naruko hum happily, and smiled briefly. She actually wondered what the girl she admired wanted with her sensei. Maybe to ask for tips?

Sakura Haruno was not having a good day. Her mother refused to tell her if she had somewhat said something to her Aniki, but she knew it had to do something with 'Yuhi-san' to begin with. Since she could get nothing out of her mother so soon once more, she decided to let it rest for the day. Still, when she was worried or angered, she always returned to the photo albums.

Sakura slowly opened the album of pictures she had taken from the attic, and began to look through them.

She had to say it to herself: she was a pretty baby, what with her tuft of pink hair and her green eyes. Her older brother was in one photo, holding her carefully and scared he might drop her. The next photo always melted her heart, because it was the one in which Onii-sama played with her.

He had never acted like her classmates' older brothers, not much anyway. She remembered his kindness in taking her to the park when their parents were busy working. When she cried, he was the first to come and see what was wrong.

She flipped another page, and nearly choked. Her Onii-sama was dressed as a ghost for Halloween, and was carrying her around. She remembered she had been scared of half of the village that night: everyone was in costume, and it was scary!

That picture had been taken before leaving, and…and she frowned.

Her brother had been eleven then. She had been five…or maybe four. She was dressed like a pretty princess and…there, in the corner of the photo waiting for them was…

A dark-haired girl wearing a Chuunin flak jacket…

She resembled…

"Why was she there?" Sakura muttered, frowning.

There had been something else afterwards…she detested the fact that she couldn't remember what it was but…

What reason did a Chuunin have to be there? Her eyes went from her Onii-sama to the girl. She closed them, and then opened them up again.

The chin…the slight tip of the nose…

"No…" she croaked out.

The eyes, both red…nobody in her family had red eyes.

"But…"

The hair, raven…

She closed the photo album and breathed. She was exaggerating. It wasn't _possible_.

"Sakura! Dinner is ready!" her mother called from downstairs. She clutched the photo-album to her chest and swallowed.

She was a kunoichi…and she was going to get her answers, one way or the other.

"I'm coming mom!" Sakura exclaimed, quickly descending. "Mom?"

"Yes, Sakura? Have you washed your—"

Sakura's eyes firmly settled on her mother. "Mom…is Onii-sama…is he really my brother?"

"Sakura? Of course he—"

"His baby pictures," Sakura deadpanned. "Where are they?"

"He must have taken them with him when he left," Mebuki replied sharply. "Why are you still insisting on this? Come and eat before it gets cold."

Sakura's eyes moved to her father, who was quietly looking elsewhere.

"Dad? Is Onii-sama really my brother?"

"Sakura! Stop asking the same question! The answer won't change!" Mebuki exclaimed.

"Mebuki," Kizashi said quietly. "Come on…I think it's time."

Mebuki bit her lip. "But…"

"It's all right," Kizashi nodded. "If you don't want to, I'll take care of it…"

Mebuki sighed and sat. Her eyes then went to Sakura.

She opened her mouth to speak.

Kurenai Yuhi heard someone knocking at the door —actually, 'knocking' was a euphemism for 'banging on it so hard it was a wonder it hadn't fallen'.

She opened it to find Hinata and…

"_YOU_!" Naruko pointed her accusing finger at her, "Did you do something to my Aniki!?"

Kurenai blinked, and then looked at Hinata for some explanation.

Hinata fidgeted for an instant, before slowly muttering.

"Ehm…sensei…Naruko-chan…wanted to know about…Haruno-kun and…"

"Ah," her eyes returned to Naruko. "That is none of your business."

She made to close the door, only for Naruko to keep her foot right against it.

"_**TO HELL IT ISN'T!**_ _Aniki's my precious brother_! If you broke his arm, I'll make _YOU_ cry, 'ttebayo!"

Kurenai sighed. The neighbours would probably make a complaint if this kept up. She opened the door completely. "Fine then…come in."

Naruko narrowed her eyes on her, but entered. Hinata bowed properly and then followed.

Kurenai closed the door. She knew it was going to be a long night.

The centre of everyone's thoughts and worries however wasn't at home. No, he was watching the flow of the river of training ground seven, his eyes gazing off in the distance as the moon reflected on the surface of the water.

He heard the soft rustling of footstep approaching, and turned just in time to see the approaching figure of Kakashi Hatake.

"Yoh! Why out so late?"

"Felt like it," he remarked.

There was silence for a moment, the copy-cat ninja flipping the page of his book —how he could read without light was a wonder— and he simply watching the water flow.

"Are you going to ask me how I broke my arm too?"

"Uhm? No," Kakashi said.

"Thank you," he sighed. "Maito-san's attempt was the most obvious of them all. Am I really that much of an attraction?"

"Uhm…probably," Kakashi acquiesced.

Silence descended once more.

He broke it first. "Do you think…do you ever think about how…well, sometimes life is just cruel? How things just keep piling up on you, like there's no respite from pain and…well, you just have to live with it?"

Kakashi slowly looked back at him with his only unflinching eye. "Yes."

"How do you cope with that?" he asked back. "I know I should be happy, I know that this is nothing compared to what many others in the world suffer from but…but I can't help but feel _loss_." He exhaled. "It hurts."

"Uh-uhm," Kakashi hummed. "I live with it," he replied then.

"Useful," he snorted. There was a beat of silence. "You're a really strong ninja, right?"

"Yes, they say so," Kakashi commented.

"Can I ask you a favour?"

"Depends on the favour," the man replied.

"Am I being followed currently?" he finally sighed. "I have this nagging sensation that there's someone following me since a few weeks, but I can't find out if it's just paranoia or not."

"Ah…" Kakashi chuckled. "Yes, you're being followed."

"I knew it," he sighed. "I doubt he'll come out if I call him, right?"

"Oh, you never know," Kakashi remarked. "Try calling for Anbu. Maybe one will magically appear out of nowhere."

He sweat-dropped. "I don't think they work like that."

"I worked in Anbu," Kakashi retorted. "Once we played a prank towards a boasting drunkard who said he was an Anbu. Every time he said the word 'Anbu' we'd appear and ask what the trouble was. We kept it up the entire night and for the following week." Kakashi chuckled. "It was also a form of hazing for the new recruits."

He blinked. "I think…I think I'm glad I'll never enter Anbu."

Kakashi hummed his approval.

"Want to go for a drink?" he asked then.

Kakashi closed his book. "I thought you'd never ask."

And with that…a friendship was born.


	29. Learning

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Kurenai sighed, holding a cup of tea in her hands.

"The day the Kyuubi attacked should be the starting point," Kurenai said calmly. Naruko tensed, but kept her gaze on the red-eyed woman. "That is the day I lost my father, or…to be more precise, the day my brother and I lost our father."

"Y-Your brother?" Naruko said feebly. Her eyes wide in shock.

She nodded. "I was fifteen at the time, a Chuunin. My brother was seven. When the Kyuubi was defeated, there was so much destruction and death there wasn't even the time to grieve the dead. Our house was destroyed among the first too, so there wasn't anything I could do. He ended up in the orphanage, and I began doing missions."

"How did he end up with the Haruno?" Naruko asked softly.

"Mebuki Haruno was a friend of our mother. She couldn't keep us both, so I just asked her eventually to take my brother in. You have to understand: Konoha was in dire straits after the attack, and I recall spending nearly an entire year out on missions without a moment of breath," Kurenai winced. "I think he probably thought I abandoned him."

"Duh!" Naruko exclaimed. "You could have visited!"

"At first I did," Kurenai remarked. "But…you know how in the academy, you start at five?" she said softly. "You don't start using chakra until you're older, so if you can become a shinobi or not…you don't know until then," she shook her head. "When he told me he'd never be a shinobi…I was glad."

"You bitch!" Naruko was on her feet, fists clenched. "What the hell is wrong with you!?"

Kurenai's eyes sharpened. "I had done a long string of missions, one worse than the other," she replied bitterly. "I didn't think much of what I said. He took it the wrong way."

Naruko was floored. "But…but why did you leave him there, with the Haruno? Sakura's mother wanted him to be a shinobi!"

"Sakura," Kizashi said gently, "You know how much we work, right?"

Sakura feebly nodded.

"Well, when Mebuki took in your brother, I thought it would be good practice for when we would have our own. When Yuhi-san asked us to keep him, because she couldn't…well, I just thought you'd like having an older brother."

Mebuki grimaced. "Should have known the deal was rotten."

"Mebuki!" Kizashi chided his wife. "It wasn't a deal. It was a favour."

"So," Naruko said numbly. "You first asked them to keep him, and then were glad when he couldn't become a shinobi?"

Kurenai fidgeted. "It's…more complicated than that."

"No, it isn't," Naruko replied, clenching her fists. "_**WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?**_ He's your brother, and you just abandoned him! To people who then didn't want him anymore!"

"It was still better than the orphanage," Kurenai feebly retorted.

"_THE HELL IT IS!_ I know what it means, to be judged for something you had no power to decide for! Aniki…Aniki probably just wanted you to take him back home, and you didn't." Naruko's eyes narrowed to fissures against the woman.

Sakura stared wide-eyed from her mother to her father, swallowing nervously.

"S-So…Onii-sama…isn't my Onii-sama?"

"I'm sure he still is," Kizashi said calmly. "I think it matters what you want him to be, not what blood ties you."

Sakura slowly stood up and wobbled back upstairs, ignoring the dinner —completely untouched.

Naruko angrily left the woman's house. How dared she call herself Aniki's sister, when she hadn't been there for him at all? She was angry, and as she reached for her Aniki's apartment, she knocked furiously on the door. She was going to prank the woman so hard she'd be itching from spots previously unknown! Still, if she hadn't broken his arm…then who had!?

Nobody answered her, so she carefully entered her own apartment and then passed through the hole in the wall. She could see the slumped form of her Aniki asleep and…

Oh no, that _bitch_ just didn't.

She clenched her teeth and was about to scream to the top of her lungs, when she decided against it. She looked at the situation at hand and then smiled. Sure, it was going to be embarrassing…

But oh so worth it.

He woke up with a thrumming headache. His broken arm didn't hurt him particularly, but there was something slightly heavy atop it that made it uncomfortable. His throat was parched.

He remembered going to drink with the copy-cat ninja. He remembered exchanging words, then Anko appearing out of nowhere —had he been already drunk by then?

He knew they had talked but…he couldn't remember what about, and then…then she had offered to bring him home and Kakashi had made a thumb-up gesture and had left shuddering something about 'green spandex' rubbing off him.

Then he didn't remember anything else until he had woken up. His eyes slightly open, he realized there was a naked body next to him. Anko probably slept naked —he suspected that much— and since he was still half-dressed he doubted anything had happened.

There was another 'body' however, whose head was resting on his cast and drooling on it.

"Ramen…no more Aniki…too much…" Naruko moaned as she snickered in her sleep. "More ramen…s'okay…"

He blinked. It was too early for this. He slowly nudged Naruko to the side and then stood up. Anko instinctively scuttled closer to the other form in the bed, and he actually held back a snicker at the sight of the woman hugging Naruko between her breasts while grumbling.

And Naruko's muttering of 'Mochi' made him nearly start chuckling.

Nearly, because he had a massive headache and frankly, he didn't actually 'want' to be there when they both woke up.

He began to cook breakfast, deciding to be the proper gentleman and offer it to both the 'walking disasters' he apparently had signed for in his life. Life went on anyway, so there was no need to keep on grieving over the past.

"Ehi," Anko muttered as she slowly cracked an eye open. "Why is the brat biting my tits?"

"I think she's hungry," he replied as if discussing an animal's feeding habits. "Sometimes she bites on my clothes too when she's asleep…you just don't have clothes."

Anko smiled sweetly, which sort of meant 'I'm going to murder someone'. "How endearing. You mind if I wake her up gently?"

"Define gently?" he said back while returning to the pans.

"Kunai through the—"

"That's not gentle," he quipped.

Naruko groaned as she slowly opened her eyes for a moment. She blinked. Why was her mouth attached to a Mochi? No, the mocha was…maybe a bun? Was it a meat bun? She opened her eyes more, the meat bun was attached to…her eyes travelled upwards and then…

"AH!" she jumped back, falling on the ground and sputtering. "YOU! ARGH! GAH!" she passed her hands on her tongue repeatedly.

"Aw," Anko said fluttering her eyelids, "I didn't know you batted for the other team, brat."

"I don't!" Naruko screamed back at her. "_YOU OLD HAG!_ W-What are you doing here!?"

"Eating breakfast," she deadpanned. "So are you, apparently."

He nodded thoughtfully.

"Y-You! Why are you in Aniki's bed!?"

"I carried him back home," Anko smiled. "He was slightly…drunk, so I tucked him in! And then I thought: what ugly pillows he has, maybe he'll need something…" she cupped her breasts, "softer."

The fact he wasn't even blushing as he watched a naked Anko try to one-up Naruko spoke a long deal. He was going to consider it all a massive hallucination until the time came when his brain would jumpstart. He needed more tea in his system before he even began to think straight —let alone deal with the mess.

Anko's clothes weren't that far out, so as the Jounin took a shower and then dressed with a cheesy smirk, Naruko huffed and looked towards him.

"Neh, Aniki?"

"Yes?" he asked, using his right hand to move the pan to the centre of the table.

"Who broke your arm?" she asked.

"Again?" he grumbled. "I said I slipped and—"

"His mother," Anko said with a light smirk. "He told me _everything_ last night," the woman's smile was positively feral. "He really can't hold his liquor."

He paled.

Naruko's eyes widened for a moment, before they settled into the usual glint that announced death and devastation to soon follow.

Anko's own were pretty much the same and, standing one in front of the other sitting at the same table, he couldn't help but think they both had quite a bit of similarities…especially in the way they both grinned at one another.

"It's…it's nothing, really," he said slowly. "It's water under the bridge."

"Of course Aniki," Naruko said with a quick nod.

"Yes, lover-boy, of course," Anko retorted.

"Neh, saggy tits?" Naruko said, looking at Anko who sported a nervous tick mark.

"What is it, brat?"

"I had this idea with tampons and chili peppers that…"

He shuddered and exhaled. Really…were they ever going to learn?

Mebuki Haruno felt suddenly cold —extremely so— as she walked down the street. Not only did she feel watched, but she could swear she had been going through the same street at least thrice.

She felt as if the shinigami himself was lurking just around the corner, ready to strike at her. She swallowed nervously…it couldn't be, right? Now, if the blond haired man dressed in black stopped going in her same direction and whistling at the same time, everything would be better.

Joe Black whistled as he followed Mebuki Haruno...

It was good to be the Shinigami.


	30. Troubling

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty

Mebuki Haruno's day began with bright orange glowing paint…_in her room_. She blinked once, before slowly nudging Kizashi out of his sleep. Her husband blinked and looked at the ceiling, the walls and the windows.

"Did you paint them?" he asked carefully.

"Of course I didn't!" Mebuki hissed back. "In the middle of the night? Oh come on!" she slipped on her negligée, before opening the first drawer for some clothes that hadn't been turned horrendously coloured. She heard a loud bang, and a shower of confetti fell on her. They were sticky confetti, covered in glue. She screamed as she walked away from it, only to trip against a wire at the door and fall body first on a _skateboard_, which began to head towards the stairs.

Mebuki managed to push herself off it —she wasn't an ex Kunoichi for nothing— before hitting the stairs. She heard the skateboard clang downwards, unleashing more explosions of pastries and whatnot. She blinked in confusion as she finally heard the noises die down. Carefully, a step at a time, she went downstairs to check on the damage.

The kitchen was a mess. The bathroom destroyed, the hall covered in graffiti and whipped cream…it had all the feeling of being a prank but…

But her house had been destroyed. It would take days to get it clean, to repair the damage to the pipes —clogged with what looked like a red sweater…her _favourite_ red sweater.

Pale faced, on the verge of tears, she slowly stumbled to the door and opened it. She hoped that after taking the newspaper everything else would turn out to be a nightmare.

Quietly, she slowly grabbed the paper.

Her hands remained stuck to it as it sizzled, before detonating in a shower of poop and paper confetti.

In that moment, she began to scream incoherently and _cry_.

"That," Anko said from a building afar, "Is a prank."

Naruko scrunched her face for a moment. "Isn't it…a bit too much?"

"Listen kid," Anko replied. "And learn it well: sometimes, people need the hard lesson to get it to stick. You break a leg, you cave in their nose and they learn not to trouble you any longer."

"But she's still Sakura's mom," Naruko mumbled. "And Aniki's…"

"She broke his arm."

"But she's _crying_."

"Serves her well then," Anko snapped back. "How's our alibi looking?"

Naruko blinked. "I think…I think we'll be fine on that front," she muttered. "But it doesn't look right to me, this thing. Aniki said to let it be."

"Oh, he'll say that but he'll be happy when he hears about it," Anko replied smoothly. "Everyone enjoys payback."

Naruko fidgeted but said nothing. They returned to their previous 'alibi' location: Aniki's home. They had booby trapped the house during the night, but she had left two Kage Bunshin clones home to act like her and Anko until they returned. So when Aniki woke up, he would be able to claim they had never left the house.

She entered with Anko from her apartment. They slipped out of their 'work' clothes and donned their respective 'sleep' attire. Then carefully —as Aniki was busy cooking breakfast once more— she and saggy tits swapped with their clones, which then dispersed harmlessly in smoke away from sight.

"Yawn…" she yawned as she stood up. "Yum! Aniki!" she stumbled out of bed and proceeded to hug him as he spun around.

"Naruko," he greeted her, "And Anko," he sighed. "I'll need a bigger apartment if you two plan to keep on crashing on my bed."

Really, he couldn't understand why they found it so comfortable. He had taken the sofa last night, but hell if the two of them _snored_. It was as if they were making that much noise on purpose while sleeping. He shrugged it off and proceeded to set the table.

"Ehi, Naruko? Shouldn't you be off to meet with your teacher?"

Naruko frowned. "I don't like him," she muttered. "He's a damn pervert. He agreed to teach me only when I showed him the Sexy no Jutsu."

"The sexy no Jutsu?" Anko's ears perked up.

"No," he said firmly before Naruko could speak. "If you _dare_ teach Anko that technique, I will withhold ramen from this household henceforth…_for eternity_."

Naruko swallowed and then furiously nodded.

Anko pouted, her shoulders sagging.

"Naruko? What's his name?" he asked then. He supposed it had to be Jiraiya anyway, but…

"Jiraiya something," Naruko pouted. "He says he's a sannin but he's more of a pervert: he even says so! Stupid Kakashi-sensei…he could have trained me," the girl muttered. "Why did he have to train only Duckbutt…"

He sighed. "Jiraiya of the Sannin is a really strong shinobi, you know? He's way stronger than your sensei."

Naruko kept on pouting.

"Like, he's probably second only to the Hokage…" he feebly added.

"He's a pervert, Aniki! He had me sign a contract with toads —those things are yucky! And then he wants me to bring out one of them, but all I get are tadpoles…"

He blinked.

"Hey brat!" Anko exclaimed then, "Summoning contracts aren't something stupid or yucky! Hell, did you know what you were signing to begin with?"

Naruko looked at Anko with a perplexed expression. That made the Tokubetsu Jounin's head drop slightly.

"When you sign a contract, you can summon them but they can summon you back! And when the holder of the contracts makes you sign one, he's basically taking you on as an apprentice!" the woman sighed. "You have no idea what I'm saying, right?"

"Yep!" Naruko smiled brightly at that.

"Why did I have that impression…"

There was a knock at the door, and he went to open —it was a lost cause to try to 'pilfer' food from the main pot when both Kunoichi were faster and quicker than him, but thankfully rice wasn't something that was lacking in the household.

Household. He actually stopped for a moment to look back at the two girls, who were strangely…not eating? Tense?

Had they actually learned to leave him some side dishes? Was that a miracle?

He then opened the door, and nearly died of a heart attack there and then.

When the _Hokage_ knocks at your door in the early morning…you just _know_ someone's out for your blood.

He swallowed nervously. "Hokage-sama?"

"Jiji!?" Naruko exclaimed from behind him.

"Heya Big Boss!" Anko yelled.

The stern look the old man gave however…why did it seem as if it was to promise pain?

Why?

**Author's notes**

**Could the readers do me a favour? Could you Google 'Mary sue test' and try to compile it with the information of the OC hereby? I've been told he looks and feels Mary Sueish, so I checked it out and I ended up with 10 points. (Until sixteen, it's a normal character that can be spiced up). Since I'm a biased source, if someone would do the same from the 'audience' side I'd be grateful.**


	31. Repenting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-One

There were three people sitting at a table.

On one side, there was the Hokage. On the other, there were both Naruko and Anko.

"Do you have anything to say for yourself?" the Sandaime said crisply.

"We have an alibi?" Anko tried weakly.

"I am sorry to say this, but I doubt Haruno-kun's eyewitness will be much of worth, when compared to that of an Anbu," the man nodded towards a corner, where a cat-masked shinobi emerged.

He raised an eyebrow. "So…he's the one who's been following me?"

Hiruzen nodded, and then he blinked. "How do you know that?"

"I'm used to surprise attacks," he replied, eying the two girls who had the decency to look guilty.

The Sandaime calmly took out his pipe and began to light it. "As you know, there are laws set in place for shinobi attacking or otherwise using techniques against civilians."

"But we just pranked her!" Naruko exclaimed, only for Anko to roll her eyes.

"Well done brat: now they know we did it. You need to deny always in interrogations!"

Naruko squirmed and then looked downcast.

Hiruzen sighed. His voice became soft as he spoke. "Naruko, there are laws for a reason," he began carefully. "And there are punishments that always meet the crime."

The Sandaime returned stern afterwards. "You should both be thankful this is Konoha, and my word is law rather than the Daimyo's own, or you'd _both_ be seeing the prison for a long time." He narrowed his eyes on Anko. "What you did was foolish, and because of it I am actually envisioning stripping you of your rank of Tokubetsu Jounin and sending you on a long set of boring patrols…and if it weren't for the risk of you causing a diplomatic incident, I'd do it in a heartbeat."

He then looked towards Naruko. "And you, Naruko…while you are not new to pranks I expected better judgment now that you are a Genin."

Naruko squirmed on her seat.

"However, I will make sure you both learn to value this as an important lesson." He looked towards Anko. "Your punishment will be decided by Ibiki Morino…you are to report to him within the end of the hour."

The woman froze and her eyes grew wide. "I-Ibiki?"

"Yes."

She shuddered. "Can…Can I take the long term patrols, please?"

"No," the Sandaime's voice was tight as it spoke. "A crime without punishment does not teach a lesson."

Then he carefully added. "Your punishment, Naruko, will be decided instead by Haruno-kun," Naruko's eyes widened before they turned to look at him, who was standing with his arms crossed over his chest slightly away from the table.

He locked eyes with her and…he sighed, grimacing as he shook his head.

"What am I going to do to you…" he muttered under his breath. Naruko hung her head in shame.

"Furthermore, you both will field a part of the cost to repair the house," the Hokage's eyes trailed on Anko. "As a Tokubetsu Jounin, you will field the eighty per cent of it."

"W-What!?" Anko sputtered.

"And I expect you both to go and personally apologize for the damage done to the owner of the house."

"W-WHAT!?" Naruko screamed. "No! The woman deserved it! She broke Aniki's arm! You can't tell me I have to say I'm sorry to her, if she doesn't do the same!"

"Naruko!" he chided her, making the girl wince at the tone used. The Sandaime turned his gaze towards him, who sheepishly brought his right hand to his mouth. "Sorry."

"I suspected as much for a reason, which is why I made sure to convince her to not press any charges. This is me, evening the score," the Sandaime said then calmly. "But Naruko, this is the last time I will personally intervene on such a thing. Next time, if you do something like this…I will let it go through the proper channels," he added then slowly. "And as your guardian, it will be Haruno-kun here who will face the consequences of your actions."

Then the Sandaime said the cost of the repairs, and Anko cursed loudly.

It was his hair however, which rose.

He supposed…well, he had put aside Naruko's own contributions to the house —really, he didn't want to take money from a kid— but considering the price in question…he'd use that. It was Naruko's money and it would pay Naruko's crime.

"I understand Jiji," Naruko sniffled slightly. "I swear I won't do it again!"

"Very well, I trust you both know the way to the house you vandalized," the Hokage added. "She is expecting you."

Naruko swallowed, while Anko's shoulders just sagged. They both stood and moved to leave, but when Naruko's eyes turned to look at her Aniki, she saw him talking conceitedly with the Hokage. She was actually pulled out of the apartment by Anko, but not before hearing him say…

"I suppose this will cover the costs of her side."

"Haruno-kun, you don't have to—"

He looked at the door closing, and then shook his head. "I should have warned them more sternly about it. I'm sure at least Naruko wouldn't have gone with it. And it's partly my fault anyway: if I had gone through the proper channels, people wouldn't feel the need to vindicate me."

"Maybe, but you couldn't know they would resort to this," the Hokage sighed. "Have you met with Jiraiya, yet?"

He blinked. "No, I…I should?"

The Sandaime shook his head. He could swear he had heard him say 'you're practically doing his job' under his breath, but he doubted it.

"It's fine, anyway was there something else…"

"The escort," he deadpanned. "Do I really need one?"

"Of course you do," the Sandaime retorted. "You might be targeted after all."

He choked. "What!?"

"There are foreign shinobi who might be interested in seeing the skills of those fighting in the arena beforehand. Why do you think everyone trains privately? Of course, it is extremely rare that such a circumstance might occur, but better safe than sorry right?"

"Hokage-sama…I don't need an escort, really."

The Sandaime sighed. "Fine, Haruno-kun…" he looked towards the boy. "You have to understand that Orochimaru possesses a technique, one that he can use to steal the face of other living being and pass as them. That was how he infiltrated the exams. Naruko is an extremely important member of Konoha, as you know…and you are the closest person she has. If he were to manage too substitute with you…"

"B-But he doesn't even know I exist I hope!"

"Ah, I hope so too. But hope and certainty are different things," the Sandaime commented. "This is why I made sure to have someone watching you all the time."

"You can't be…" he closed his eyes. "You are."

He exhaled. "All right then…It's not like I have much of a choice."

"This is only temporary," the Sandaime reassured him. "Once the tournament is done and the threat dies out, you will be freed from your escort."

He grimaced and then went to grab the money from beneath the sink. He actually was surprised. Naruko had tried to give him quite the bit of money during the years, and it was quite enough to pay her side of the repairs.

One of the Anbu nodded as he took the money, before the Hokage turned to leave.

"Oh, Haruno-kun?"

"Yes?"

"I can't seem to recall…what is your name?"

He blinked. "Oh, well…it's Shinku."

"Crimson?"

He shrugged. "My father liked red…and he didn't have much imagination."

Hiruzen smiled as he left, followed by the rest of his escort.

Shinku turned to the Anbu guard —more like watchdog— and then asked quietly. "W-Would you like some tea?"

The Anbu said nothing, and returned to the shadows.

"How can one go in the shower with someone trailing them?" he muttered to himself as he looked at the time. "H-Hell!" he exclaimed. There was no time for a shower.

He was going to be late for work!

As he hurried off, unknowingly followed by his guard, a white haired sannin hopped down from a nearby roof and calmly sauntered in the apartment —really, the lock was pitiful.

He then cracked his fingers. "Very well," there was a gleam in the man's eyes. "Let us see…friend or foe!"

Then Jiraiya of the Sannin began to look throughout Shinku's house…

For Porn.

**Author's notes**

**Thanks for the time taken. **

**Shinku is Crimson. Kurenai's name means Crimson too. **


	32. Punishing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Two

Naruko grimaced. Anko had most valiantly knocked, bowed, and then said she was sorry and had left. She on the other hand, she was fidgeting.

"Well?" Mebuki said, with her eyebrow raised.

"I…" she just had to say three words, and then leave. It wasn't supposed to be that difficult! "Why did you hurt Aniki?" she blurted out.

The woman looked at her in silence for a moment, before snorting out. "Did he set you up for this?"

"No! Aniki would never do that!" Naruko clenched her fists. "Why do you hate him? He did nothing to you!"

"Nothing?" she replied, bringing up an eyebrow. "Really? You call sending you and that psycho to tear down my house nothing?"

"He didn't know what we were planning! And you deserved it anyway!"

"Maybe I did," Mebuki acquiesced, "But what you did was wrong."

"Why, you!" Naruko snarled. "Family should always stick together, and yet you just went and broke his arm! What did he do!?"

The woman crossed her arms over her chest, eying the girl in front of her with disdain. "It's not a matter of what he did, but of what he didn't do."

Naruko's gaze was murderous. "It's not his fault he can't be a shinobi for Kami's sake!"

"No, but it's his fault for choosing to get entangled with you!" Mebuki snarled back. Naruko took a step back, eying with wide eyes the woman. "You think I did it because I hate him? No! How could I? It's just his fault that he can't see what's right in front of him! I told him to take a job as an accountant, but did he do it? No! He refused, and I wouldn't have any of that! So maybe I yelled at him, but it was because I was _worried_ for him!" Mebuki snapped with her eyes murderous.

"When he _finally_ found something he wanted to do, it wasn't a nice and well paid job, but something that would keep on hurting him day after day! Why, you think he's happy teaching shinobi brats? Teaching students who will become something he dreamed to be and will never be? Which sort of masochistic freak would do that, uh!? And all of that…was because of you." She pointed an accusing finger at Naruko, who paled and trembled slightly.

"You took away my parents," Mebuki continued angrily, "And then you took away my son," she added. "Haven't you had enough?" there were tears in the woman's eyes now. "When are you going to stop taking things away from others? Can't you see it?"

"I…That's not…"

"My son is too kind for his own good," Mebuki muttered bitterly. "He'll never tell you what a bother you are to him, but if you keep this up…you'll end up killing him…then again, that's what you do, isn't it?"

"That's not true!" Naruko exclaimed back. "I'm sorry for the house! Really! But I'm not…I'm not…Aniki chose it!"

"Why don't you ask him then?" Mebuki replied. "Why don't you try and make him angry? See what he tells you, when he grows tired of you?"

"You're just a liar! Aniki isn't like that!" Naruko shook her head strongly.

"Then ask him," Mebuki said. "Ask him if he'd rather have you or his real sister back."

And then the woman closed the door in front of Naruko's face.

"I'll do that!" Naruko screamed to the door, "And you'll see 'ttebayo!"

Then she hurried off. She'd show her! Aniki had promised he'd never leave her, so really…the woman was just lying. She entered her apartment first however, carefully eying the 'hole' to reach her Aniki. She stopped and drew her breath. She wasn't scared of anything. She'd show that woman!

"Aniki," Naruko said hesitantly as she carefully brought her head through the 'hole', "are you mad?"

"Yes," he remarked. "Now come over here and we'll talk." He drummed his fingers on the surface of the table. Naruko swallowed nervously, and then wobbled past the 'hole' and into the house. She fidgeted for a moment, before taking a seat at the table.

"Naruko," he said, watching as the girl actually stood ramrod straight at being called, while visibly nervous. "What you did was wrong."

"B-But…"

"Naruko!" he snapped once more, making her quiet. "How would you feel, if what you did happened to you?"

"I'd feel…angry, and I'd prank them back!" she nodded. "I wouldn't go telling Jiji, you mean spying bully-lover!" she said the last part to the corner of the room, where he suspected she believed the Anbu guard was.

"Naruko, leave the Anbu in peace. She did her job."

"She?"

"I discovered it was a she," he nodded. "Because she gladly pointed out that no, she would not follow me in the bathroom."

He blinked then. "Don't change the discussion! I'm trying to be angry at you!"

"I'm sorry!" Naruko said then, her eyes watery…she wasn't using the puppy-eye technique, was she? "Please…Aniki, I promise…I won't do it again…"

"I'm sure you won't," he sighed. "No ramen for a month, Naruko."

Naruko blinked. "W-What?" she sputtered. "One month? N-No! It's…I mean, I was defending you Aniki! You can't be…"

"Naruko," he sharply replied. "I told you to let it be, didn't I? This is a soft punishment, Naruko…please understand I don't like doing this," he was actually uncomfortable. "But you need to learn when something is wrong."

"I understand," Naruko sniffled. She clenched her fists as tears menaced to come out of her eyes. "You're taking her side."

"What?"

"Sakura's or your mother's or whatever…why? You promised!"

"I promised I'd be there for you, Naruko. I didn't say I'd turn a blind eye to your misgivings!" he retorted.

"Yeah, right," Naruko sulked. "Well, guess what? I'm not going to stop eating ramen just because you said so!"

He stared at Naruko in surprise. Was…

_Was she going through puberty?_

"Naruko! I'm your guardian!"

"_I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO BE MY GUARDIAN!_" Naruko screamed back. "I didn't ask you to take the blame for me! I didn't ask you to—"

That was when he slammed his fist on the table —his intact one, if he did that with the broken arm he'd curse himself.

"I…I should have asked you first, right?" he muttered. "Is that why you're angry? You'd rather have your sensei or someone else as your guardian?"

Naruko felt the tears menacing to burn through her eyes. Why couldn't her Aniki understand it wasn't _that_ the problem!?

"Stop it," Naruko muttered.

"Uh?"

She clenched her fists. "Stop doing that."

"Naruko? I'm afraid I don't under—"

"_STOP LYING THROUGH YOUR TEETH! YOU'RE ANGRY AT ME SO __**BE ANGRY**__!_" she screamed to the top of her lungs, tears falling down her cheeks.

"I'm mad at you, not ang—"

"Why can't you just stop?" Naruko mumbled. "Why do you have to keep on trying? Aniki…when I threw chalk at Iruka, he'd be mad. You'd just laugh it off. When I painted him orange, he'd pursue me…you'd just laugh it off…" she clenched her fists. "Why can't you be angry? I'm…I'm not…" she swallowed. "I'm still going to be here. You can be angry with me."

"Naruko? I'm really not following you any longer," Shinku muttered. "Really, I'm slightly peeved you didn't listen to me, but you were roped in it by Anko. It's more of her fault than yours and she's already getting punished. I don't understand what you're angry about."

"You paid for my side of the damages," Naruko accused him. "You took the blame. Your mom…she hates me and she doesn't talk to you because of me. I'm…I'm hated and everyone glares at you and you're still here anyway! _Why don't you just leave!?_"

"Because I know how much it hurts," he whispered back. "To be abandoned, to be left alone…to feel as if nobody wants you and everyone just pities or mocks you for what you are. You think I'd let anyone else suffer through that?"

"You're talking about Kurenai-sensei?"

He blinked. "How do you know that?"

She blushed slightly, looking sideways. "I…I sort of kicked at her door until I got her to tell me the story."

He hung his head. "Naruko…"

"B-But!" Naruko stammered, "I was worried about you Aniki! I knew you were lying about it! I mean, you never fall!"

He chuckled. "Oh, I fall too Naruko. I just make sure you're not there to see it when I do," he added. "And now, are you done crying?"

Naruko shook her head. "I'm not crying."

"Oh, my mistake then," he replied standing up. "How about you help me with the cooking? I've only got one arm and fried rice is starting to bore me to death."

"All right! How about we make Ramen to start, Aniki!?"

Naruko fist-pumped in the air.

"The punishment still stands, Naruko."

She deflated visibly.

"Come on, you'll need to know how to cook for when you'll marry."

"That's sexism." Shinku nearly choked. The Anbu had actually spoken!

"Would Anbu-san like to remain for dinner?" he asked back.

There was no reply.

He sighed. Well, one drop at the time…can chip away even stone.

That's when they knocked at the door, and he carefully went to open it.

In front of him stood a broad shouldered white haired shinobi, wearing…well, bizarre clothes.

"Heya! Is this the brat's house?"

"Aniki! It's the pervert!"

"It's Super Pervert to you, brat!" the man…probably Jiraiya, said once more.

"Jiraiya-sama?" Shinku said in disbelief.

"The one and only!" the other shinobi made a bright smile. "You've got a spot at the table for one more? I brought sake and porn!"

Oh well, if he brought sake and…

"Wait. What was that last part?"

"Porn! Every healthy male should have some porn stashed somewhere! Oh, and red-laced girl can go with ease! I'll take care of everything for the moment."

"Red laced?" Shinku had no idea what…

"Jiraiya-sama," the Anbu said then, "Please die." The Anbu disappeared the next moment as the man chuckled.

"Red Laced?"

"The underwear of course! Ah," Jiraiya sighed. "A classic, like Black lingerie or a babydoll…"

"What's a babydoll, Aniki?" Naruko asked with interest as he sputtered. The sannin 'let himself in' and began to saunter off towards the nearby chair. Shinku sighed and closed the door. He should get accustomed to it but really…

He just hoped he wouldn't end up roped in Kami knew what.

"So, Aniki! What's a Babydoll!?" Naruko whined.

"Peel the onions carefully," he said, changing the argument.

"Muh…it's hard."

He chuckled. "Come on, I can do it. I'd show you, but with my arm as it is…"

Naruko pouted a few more minutes, but then simply went on to follow his instructions. He turned to ask if Jiraiya wanted something to drink, only to find an enormous stash of Icha-Icha and various porns on the table. He opened his mouth and then closed it. "Jiraiya-sama?"

"I find your lack of porn…disturbing," Jiraiya said darkly.

"Jiraiya-sama," Shinku replied calmly, grabbing the frying pan. "I have no regrets," he made it twirl. "This is the only path."

There was a moment of quiet silence between the two.

Then Jiraiya chuckled and in an instant, the porn disappeared. "Fine, this changes nothing though."

Why did it feel…as if he was about to be tested on something?

**Author's notes**

**Couldn't help the references.**


	33. Declaring

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Three

Naruko fell asleep after a few hours —probably tired from the effort to keep up with Jiraiya's perverted nature.

In the end, the Sannin and he ended up outside the apartment, a bottle of sake in hand each. He actually wondered why he always finished with meeting people who had a liking to alcohol.

"So, the old man told me of how you've been taking care of Naruko up until now," Jiraiya said. His eyes looked at Shinku's with some sort of hidden gleam behind it. "I'm glad someone stuck up for the brat."

"Ah…I didn't do much, really," he muttered back.

"Considering what the rest of the village did? You did more than enough," Jiraiya sighed. "I told sensei I'd check on you thoroughly before even thinking of giving you guardianship over Naruko, and…"

"Giving me?" he asked.

"Yes, the Hokage has yet to decide on it, and since I was around I quickly decided to kill two birds with one stone and check," Jiraiya hastily added.

Shinku nodded then. It made sort of sense. Maybe Jiraiya was the version of the social services, when related to Jinchuuriki? Then again considering how the Hokage had stressed the importance of Naruko…

"So, tell me," Jiraiya said. "How did you two meet?"

Shinku slowly moved the sake bottle around for a bit, letting the alcohol swish around.

"She asked me what I was reading. I answered."

"Oh? Only that?"

"The next day, I was the only one who still talked to her in the park," he added slowly. "She was barely five, covered in mud, with red puffy eyes because one of the kids had pushed her away from their game. She asked if she could read with me…and I said yes."

"Did you know who she was back then?" Jiraiya asked back.

"No," he shook his head. "I mean, I knew the Kyuubi had been sealed in someone, but back then I didn't even know her name. Took me a while, but by then…well, I'd have felt horrible ignoring her afterwards. She was just a kid. There are adults who were worse monster back then than what she supposedly...was."

He shook his head once more. "Really, she was just…sort of pleading to be hugged, you know? To have someone, anyone to just go near her and tell her it was _okay_. That loneliness…it should have broken anyone's heart, but it didn't." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "In the end…I suppose knowing or not knowing wouldn't have mattered. She was a lonely crying kid. What sort of monster doesn't go to see what's wrong?"

The civilian side of Konoha, barring a few key elements, began furiously to sneeze.

An Anbu standing guard blinked. "You think hay season has begun?" he asked to his colleague.

"I hope not," the other replied.

Jiraiya snorted.

"You're making it sound like she was followed by a crowd of madmen armed with pitchforks and torches."

"Point taken," Shinku remarked. "But very few looked beyond the words of others."

"And you were one of the enlightened?"

"I had my reasons to be among the 'enlightened'," he snorted. "Is it that difficult to believe?"

"Now, if you had any porn stashed somewhere…I'd believe you more easily."

"Naruko found one in the first hour of being in my apartment. I had to throw it all away." He took another sip of sake. "She needs to be at least forty before I even broach that argument to her."

Jiraiya laughed. "Well said!"

"So, you're training Naruko for the tournament, right?"

Jiraiya nodded. "I made her sign the summoning contract. Now, if she can get something more than a tadpole…"

"No strings attached?"

Jiraiya looked back at him perplexed, before a shining gleam of understanding settled on the Toad Sage.

"Ah, you're worried for her?"

"Of course I am." Shinku scoffed.

"Don't be," Jiraiya remarked. "I wouldn't dare harm her, not with such a strong Aniki to protect her! Oh, what can a poor Sannin do?" there was a thickly laid sarcastic undertone in his words, but that still didn't matter.

"I'm lethal with a frying pan," he deadpanned. "Frankly…" he sighed. "I hope things end up better for her, really," he looked towards a spot in the corner of the street. "You can come out, if you want a sip of sake."

Jiraiya looked at him perplexed.

He said nothing and waited a heartbeat. "Suit yourself."

He turned to Jiraiya. "I don't know if I'm followed or not every moment. So, I decided I'd randomly call on invisible people. If I'm right, they freak out. If I'm wrong, no one knows." Then he mumbled under his breath. "Being this a shinobi village, I suppose I'm freaking out half the Anbu corps patrolling the streets."

Jiraiya chuckled then. "Naruko rubbed off you?"

"No, that's all Anko," he replied. "The two are so similar I wonder if they're not mother and daughter."

He paused. "They aren't, are they?"

"What? No! You're drunk man, really drunk," Jiraiya snorted back. "There's no way, really…Anko would have to have been what, eleven years old back then? No way."

"I wonder," he mumbled. "Naruko's birthday is coming up."

"In October? That's a bit far isn't it?"

"Still…" he shrugged. "Maybe I can find something about the Uzumaki. She's an orphan, but maybe —just maybe— she does have some family left. Maybe they're assholes for having abandoned her…but maybe they just didn't know she's alive," he grimaced at the impossibility of that, "she deserves to know her parents' names at least...and I can waste a Sunday looking through the archives."

"Oh? Well, good luck with that," Jiraiya remarked. "I hear the archives are awfully disorganized, and reserved to shinobi personnel."

"I'm a teacher at the academy. I have a special pass."

"Well then…I suppose I should say 'good hunting'?"

"Thanks," he mumbled back.

What he completely missed however, was the narrowed look of suspicion Jiraiya gave him.

"You can come out, now," Shinku said once more. Jiraiya blinked. Really, who'd be so stupid to actually…

This time, the door of his apartment opened up to admit a sheepishly looking Naruko, who was scratching the back of her head as she gave a nervous smile.

Jiraiya face-planted himself against the ground, twitching slightly.

"Sorry, I heard you talk and…" she was wearing a loose pyjama with toads on it, and a frog cap beneath which her hair —loose and out of her ponytails— was held back behind her face.

"You should be asleep," Shinku sighed. "Come on now, Genin who don't go to sleep early don't become Chuunin."

"Well then," Jiraiya said with a small grin. "See you tomorrow, Naruko! Good night and thanks for the meal."

"No problem," Shinku shrugged as he closed the door and yawned once more. Naruko carefully grabbed the hem of his shirt by the wrist, holding on to it with two fingers and looking up at him.

"Aniki? I don't want you to spend your time in the archives for nothing…I did it too…there's nothing down there."

He frowned. "What?"

"I…I went down there more than once after I became a Genin. I mean, I even used Kage Bunshin and…there's nothing there. Really."

He sighed. He was too drunk to think straight about it. "Fine…what do you want for your birthday then, Naruko?"

"Ramen?" Naruko hesitated as he slowly brought her to bed. He actually wondered if he could ask the owner of the apartment complex to tear down the wall separating the two apartments —Naruko was practically living in his already.

He tucked her in with a small smile. "Apart from ramen."

"I've already got everything, Aniki," Naruko said with a small yawn, her bright blue eyes looking up at him. She bit her lips as he slowly hummed and slowly started to turn to move towards his own 'bed' —the sofa.

"Aniki?" Naruko called out to him, as he was midway towards his sofa.

He turned to look at her and raised an eyebrow. She was probably half-asleep already, and was mumbling more and more.

"I love you."

His eyes widened in surprise. He brought his right hand to his mouth and remained quiet, before heading over to his bed. It was a 'I love you, brother/sister/mother' form. Really. With Naruko there was no second meaning at all involved. She'd need to be reading porn for at least half a century before she'd end up saying that with another meaning behind.

He sighed as he rested in bed.

Really…he yawned, and then fell asleep.

When he woke up the next morning, it was to Sakura's form atop him holding a bright smile, her emerald eyes twinkling and exclaiming.

"Onii-sama! Let's make babies together!"

All right.

That was _not_ how he planned to start the morning.

**Author's notes**

**Never forget the Sakura.**


	34. Washing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Four

There was a moment of silence as Sakura looked down towards him like some sort of half-crazed banshee. That moment lasted until Naruko's blond blur slammed into Sakura and sent them both to tumble of the floor.

He stood up calmly, deciding to _ignore_ _everything_ he had heard. He went to make breakfast as the two girls fought in the background.

"Let me go, Naruko! Onii-sama and I aren't tied by blood, so we can make babies! I'll name my first daughter after you!"

He shuddered. He was trying _hard_ to ignore Sakura's rants.

"Aniki doesn't want that! Can't you see? And what of the half plus seven rule!? You have to wait!"

Sakura stopped for a moment, before tapping at her forehead protector. "Old enough to kill, old enough to make babies."

She jumped ahead, slamming Naruko into the wall before charging ahead at Shinku.

In that moment, Shinku twirled his frying pan number two, and with a strong 'thunk!' sent Sakura to wobble back holding on to her forehead.

"O…Onii-samaaa!" Sakura sobbed. "It hurt!"

"You have a forehead protector," he deadpanned back. "And I'm a civilian while you're…'old enough to kill', I doubt I actually did anything to your brain."

"Sniffle," Sakura wiped away her tears. "Onii-sama promised!"

"I did not," he hung his head. "I don't know where you got that idea."

"B-But you said it!" Sakura yelled back.

Naruko remained with her eyes slightly narrowed on Sakura, before turning to look at him. He frowned. "I think you just misunderstood, Sakura," he added then gently.

"But…" Sakura's eyes had tears in them. "Onii-sama…you saw me naked…I'll never be a bride if you don't take responsibility!"

Naruko sputtered and turned red.

"WHAT!? ANIKI!?"

"You were _three_! They asked me to bathe you!" Shinku sputtered out.

Sakura just sniffled. "You saw my forb—"

"IF you call it 'forbidden place', I'm throwing you another frying pan," Shinku deadpanned. He blinked once. He had the feeling he had just done a horrendous play on words.

"Aniki!" Naruko said then pouting. "It's not fair!"

He blinked.

"What isn't?"

"I want Aniki to wash my back too!"

He closed his eyes.

He opened them again.

He carefully placed down the breakfast on the table and sat down, beginning to eat with the uttermost calm and composure.

"Aniki?" Naruko prodded on.

He finished eating, and then he walked out to go to work _completely ignoring the issue_.

That was the way to go with certain things. Things he would not touch even with prongs.

It was as he was settling down marks on the papers, and as he saw Iruka enter, that he gave the man a one over and finally decided to ask.

"Umino-san?"

"Yes?" Iruka said back.

He was about to open his mouth once more, but then decided against it. He couldn't actually find the right words. What could he say? 'Naruko wants me to bathe her'?

"Nothing," he replied smoothly. He did get a perplexed gaze from Iruka, but it ended there.

He supposed it was normal among family members to wash one another, when they had a younger sister or brother or when their parent was there but…

But Naruko was old enough to wash herself alone, and really, it wasn't proper in _any_ way. He

Once he finished working —and educating one of the first years classes on the benefits of using frying pans as self-defence instruments— he stepped out in the cooling air of Konohagakure, and with his shoulders squared marched on…towards the Archives.

Of course, it wasn't that he was trying to avoid the discussion back at home —certainly not!

He was just trying to find out earlier about it, and _that was all_. He stepped inside, showed his badge of academy instructor, and was directed without a fuss down in the archives.

The place was eerily quiet. There were nothing but rows upon rows of metallic drawers and papers —scattered papers— all around.

He exhaled slowly. He had a long way to go.

Naruko knew something was wrong with Aniki. He was doing his best to avoid her now, and that…that hurt. Maybe she shouldn't have said that, but didn't family wash one another like, with a towel and stuff? Didn't families laugh and play throwing soap in each other's eyes and things like that? And it wasn't fair that Sakura got it and she didn't.

Aniki was supposed to be her brother! So why hadn't he answered her? Maybe she had offended him?

She stood, ears perked up and ready, for him to return home. She giggled for a moment at that. Sakura in the end had to go back to her house, with her stupid lying mother, but she? She got to sleep in the same house as Aniki, and she could call that house 'home' because Aniki was there.

She balled her fists, as the clock ticked by. Her Aniki was half an hour later than usual. She could feel the fabric of her orange jumpsuit's extend slightly —she had bought them because they were cool, and being slightly elastic, they grew with her— as she pinched on the borders and fiddled with the zipper.

Aniki was now an hour late.

Naruko supposed he had remained to work an hour more, but he certainly was going to be back for dinner because Aniki never was late for dinner.

One minute later, and Naruko went ballistic.

She was never good at the waiting game. A hand seal later, and a horde of Naruko clones began to scour around Konoha. Of course, they were just hanging around on the rooftops —she hadn't purposefully created them to look for her Aniki.

Her worry grew when they all returned one after the other, to tell her they hadn't seen him.

She swallowed her nervousness down. Aniki supposedly had an Anbu guard, so he was safe. Really, she was worrying for nothing. She returned home, and she waited once more.

The apartment's air felt heavy. Naruko fidgeted a moment more, before realizing just how horrible the dust on the table looked. She proceeded to clean it up.

She went to water the plants.

She turned on the radio, but then turned it off after a few moments —what if Aniki knocked and she didn't hear him? Then again, he had the keys, but what if he had lost them?

She wasn't supposed to worry. Her Aniki was fine. He. Was. Fine.

"It's not like…he has enemies right?" she muttered to herself. "They must have held him in the academy, yeah right…it has to be that 'ttebayo."

She bit down on her lips hard, as she crossed her arms over her chest. What if it was her fault? Maybe she shouldn't have asked…but Aniki had never acted like this before!

That's when she remembered the words of the night before. Her Aniki had told her perverted teacher what he intended to gift her…and she had been scared.

What if she really did have family left? Would they want her? And if they did, what of Aniki? Aniki had lost his own family for her, and she'd repay him by leaving him again? No, no, that wouldn't be right at all! And she had looked through the archives, she had checked time and time again! There was nothing in there, really.

But what if there was? What if her Aniki, smart as he was, found something she had missed? It wouldn't be the first time, like when he asked for the salt and she couldn't find it in the cupboard, only for him to come around and point it out.

What if…what if he didn't want her anymore? No! No, that was stupid to even think about!

She'd do it her way: she'd ask him when he came back, really.

She just had to remain awake.

Shinku grabbed a chair and then narrowed his eyes.

The rat —as big as a small dog— eyed him back, showing a wicked glint of mischief in them.

"Be a nice, little, mouse and let me through," he said slowly, taking careful steps past the monster to reach for the 'U' archives at the end.

The rat squeaked, then it attacked.

He screamed his way out of that particular section of the archives, the rat quickly on his tail —that was ironic, because the rat had a tail, he didn't. He wheezed out of breath five rows later, and then weakly turned around to sigh in relief. The rat hadn't followed him past that. How had Naruko managed?

He groaned as he realized he was back in the F rows. He had no idea how the alphabetical order went: F wasn't supposed to be five rows away from U, but considering it was a shinobi village…

And did he just see the row change as he blinked his eyes?

He blinked again.

Oh, of course it would have been too easy.

He supposed it made sense. The rows changed. How was he going to find his way out? He blinked once more as he walked, and then stopped.

The exit was there.

So…there was a Genjutsu on this place? He mulled it over for a while, before turning back to the archives.

He began moving towards the Y archives. Yuhi was, after all, his actual surname.

He found the metallic drawer in a corner, opened it and —amidst the gibberish of other less important names— found what he was looking for. His own name and his real surname, with a small clause about him being 'adopted' into Haruno.

He frowned. So there was a general, wide spread Genjutsu area that covered the entire room. Then…then the rat wasn't real.

He grumbled and thought about Naruko, how difficult would it be to access her file? Wasn't he her guardian to begin with?

Once more, he found himself face to face with the rat.

"Now," he began quietly. "We both know you're an illusion," he added. "Can't you act like a fairy and wither and die up if I stop believing in you?"

The rat attacked.

And when its teeth bit down strongly on his arm…_the pain felt very real_.

He tried to pull the thing away, but when it didn't come off he began to hiss and snarl and whimper. It wasn't real. It wasn't real. He could walk forward, really easy…he just had to ignore the gnawing. It wasn't real.

It hurt like hell.

It hurt. It hurt!

He needed to leave rather than…

A turn, and he was viewing the exit once more. He gasped for air as he walked outside the archive's doors, feeling the weight of the giant rat disappear as the pain slowly receded.

He looked down at his hand.

No wound.

He sighed.

Well, he could always try the next day.

He walked outside, surprised by how much time had passed. His stomach grumbled as he headed off towards Ichiraku. He smiled at Teuchi, who looked at him with a slightly affronted look.

"My favourite backstabbing customer," Teuchi said with a forced smile. "I should let you have a _talk_ with Naruko and Ayame one of these days."

He blinked. "I thought Ayame knew."

"My little Angel? No, of course not," Teuchi retorted sounding proud. "Then you came along." Teuchi grumbled good-naturedly. "So, what will it be?"

"Two miso ramen to take away."

"If you have Naruko back at home, a single one won't be enough."

"Technically she shouldn't be eating Ramen at all," he deadpanned. "But I just know she'd smell the ramen on my breath from a mile away, so I better pacify her with one for herself too."

Teuchi good naturedly laughed, and then added one more on the house. Shinku supposed it hadn't cost anything since it was that late in the night, and the majority of the customers had already come and gone —why Teuchi kept it open way in the middle of the night was beyond him. He supposed it had to do with patrolling Anbu coming by every now and then, or maybe the guard Chuunin at the gates doing a swap?

He walked at a leisurely pace back towards his apartment, opening the door and entering quietly. He didn't know what time it was, but he just hoped Naruko hadn't destroyed the kitchen trying to make dinner.

He found the girl with her face down against the table and her arms crossed in front of her to act as a pillow. Her nose twitched when he dropped the ramen in front of her.

"Nuh…" she moaned. He sighed.

"Naruko?"

"Ramen…" she muttered. She then popped an eye open. "There's ramen on the table," she said softly.

He smiled. "Sorry I'm late, I was held up at work."

It was then that Naruko knew something was wrong with her Aniki.

He was _lying_. Her mind awoke in less than an instant. What if…what if he had found someone to take her in? No, it couldn't be possible.

"Aniki?" she asked then, looking at him carefully.

"Yes?"

"There's ramen on the table."

"It's because I'm late. One and a half is yours."

She carefully unwrapped it. Two were Miso, but one was Pork —her favourite.

"Neh, Aniki?" she felt a lump down her throat. What if he was about to tell her something horrible, and wanted her to eat something good in the meantime? It happened in many stories, she had read so!

"Yes?" Shinku said once more, grabbing a pair of napkins and the glasses, before turning once more to get the bottle of water.

"Am…Am I…did you find someone?"

"Uh?" he looked back at her perplexed. "Find…someone? In what sense?"

"I mean…in the archives."

"Ah," he exhaled shaking his head. "No."

Naruko's lump disappeared in an instant.

"I'm going to keep on looking though," he added then, sitting down in front of the girl.

"You don't need to," Naruko softly added. "I told you I already checked!" she added, with a bit of heat.

"I know," he blinked. "But did you know there's a Genjutsu in there, that stops you from proceeding if you don't have the right authorization?"

"Really?" Naruko muttered back.

"Really. I'll be going there on another day and with a guide. I'm sure it won't be too difficult after that."

Naruko clenched her fists. "I don't want you to."

Silence stretched in the room for a while.

"You don't want to know your parents' names?"

"They're dead," Naruko softly whispered. "They won't be coming back. I don't need their names. I don't need to have any other family in Konoha but you, Aniki! Please!" there were tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry for the prank, I'm sorry you had to pay for it, I'm sorry but please, _**please**_ _don't give me away_!"

"I…" he was flabbergasted. "I didn't mean it that way, Naruko. I thought…I thought you'd like…"

"No," Naruko made an extremely pouting 'no' as her shiny eyes locked on his. "I don't wanna."

"I don't want to," he corrected her mechanically.

"I'll talk in whateva way I decidA ta!"

"That's gibberish," he retorted with a light chuckle.

"No it isn't!"

"Yes, it is."

"No!"

"Yep."

"No-uh!"

"Yes it is," he split his chopsticks. "Eat before it gets cold, worrywart."

"Neh, Aniki…" Naruko muttered, fidgeting with her own ramen. "Why won't you wash my back?"

"You're grown up, Naruko. You can wash yourself alone now," he pointed out.

"B-But!"

"Nope," he shook his head.

"So...if I weren't grown up, you'd wash it?" she asked then carefully.

"I suppose so," he sighed. "But you can't wind back time, can you?" he smiled. He had her—

"Sexy No Jutsu —Ultra Moe Edition!"

And then he blinked as a puff of smoke left the place to a chibi Naruko with bright, bright blue eyes that sparkled, while her cheeks reddened slightly as her tiny lips made a small pout.

"Pretty please, Onii-san, let's take a bath together?"

His heart gave way.

He fell on the ground.

K.O by Moeness.

**Author's notes**

**Went to the Beach twice. Yesterday and today. Both times 'destroyed' me. I am half-vampire, it is now proven true. As a sorry for not having updated, this chapter is 'twice+half' long as normal.**


	35. Gifting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Five

Naruko was humming happily, grinning as if she had just won a ramen lottery. The moment the door opened, she rushed ahead to greet her Aniki.

"I did it, Aniki!" she exclaimed with a cheerful expression. He blinked.

"You did what?"

He removed his jacket, hanging it before dropping his suitcase in the nearby shelf.

"I summoned this big mean toad! His name is Gamabunta and he's like, the boss of them all!" Naruko clapped her hands cheerfully. "And I met with the Kyuubi."

Shinku had been halfway through the kitchen when he heard that and nearly choked on his spit.

"Ah," he said slowly. "I see," he nervously laughed as he used his right hand to put the water to boil.

"He's really mean!" Naruko exclaimed after a bit, "But I walked up close to him you see, and I told him 'You have to pay me rent!' and he did it because he said 'Naruko-sama! I'm so scared of you!' and so…"

She babbled excitedly about it, somewhat adding about the man throwing her down a ravine to get her to use said chakra.

He remained dutifully busy —using one hand wasn't funny at all, and he still had two months to go.

"I'm going to kick Neji's ass when I see him! I'll squish him with a giant toad!" she nodded happily, before moving to assist him in the kitchen. She had actually bought a long white apron with bright green toads on it too, and holding her hair at the back of her head, she was pleasantly humming again as she peeled the vegetables.

"Careful when you use the knife," he chided her.

"Duh! I'm a Kunoichi Aniki, I'm not going to cut myself with a knife!" as if to prove the point, she twirled it around her fingers deftly.

"Still, it's dangerous," he retorted, steering carefully clear of the spinning knife.

Naruko nodded and returned to her own side of the cooking.

"So…you're not scared?" he asked then carefully. "Of having the Kyuubi inside you?"

She skipped a moment, nearly cutting herself, before laughing aloud. "Who? Me? I'm Naruko Uzumaki, future Hokage! I'm not scared, 'ttebayo!"

"I would be," he replied with a shrug. "It is the beast that tore down the entire village once, you know?"

"Nah! It's safe behind these big mean bars of metal!" she made a wide gesture as if to show how big they were. "And really, he's all filled with teeth but he's all bark and no bite!"

She scrunched her face upwards, to look at him. "Are you worried for me, Aniki?"

He chuckled. "Course I am. Why wouldn't I? You tend to act first and think later. Sometimes I wonder if you actually ever take your time to think it through before trying something dangerous."

"But I do think!" she pouted. "Like, how I'm going to wait until you enter the bathroom and then slip in afterwards, so you'll wash my back!"

He exhaled. "And you just told me your diabolical plan now because?"

"Ah!" her eyes widened. "Never mind Aniki! I didn't mean it! Really!"

"You didn't mean it, uh?" he raised an eyebrow. "Well…how about, if you do win the tournament, and when the cast gets off, I take you to the mixed hot springs?" the left unsaid part was 'where everyone has a costume on, and thus everything will be fine'.

Her eyes sparkled with the power of twenty-five kilotons of electricity, forcing him to stare elsewhere.

"Really!?"

"Yes."

"_**YOU'RE THE BEST ANIKI EVER DATTEBAYO**_!" and then she proceeded to crush-hug him.

"AH! The cast! NARUKO THE CAST!" he screamed back as she sheepishly let go as he cradled his arm. "Naruko," he hissed. "Really!?"

"Sorry, sorry," she looked downwards scratching the back of her head as she made a slight bow in apology.

Naruko kept on giggling and chuckling afterwards, humming happily. He sighed once more, before shaking his head slowly and returning to his side of the cooking. Really…it didn't take much to make the girl happy.

It was as dinner went by, that he asked carefully.

"Do you need anything for the tournament?"

"Uh?" she said between slurps.

"Chew your food," he sighed. "I mean, are you stocked with everything?"

"Uh-uh!" she nodded. "My fists are ready!"

"Kunai? Wires? Caltrops?"

Naruko rolled her eyes. "I don't need those, Aniki!"

"Why not?"

"Because duh, I don't need them! Neh, can you pass me the soy sauce, Aniki?"

He exhaled and shook his head. "Really?"

"Yeah, really, I need the soy sauce! Come on…" she whined making an adorable pout. "I can't reach it," she added then stretching herself. He gently lifted the soy and passed it over, eliciting a 'aha!' of excitement from Naruko as she grabbed the bottle.

"So you don't really need anything?"

"Nope!" she cheerfully said with a bright smile.

"Really?"

She scrunched her face up a bit.

"I'm fine! It's a tournament and I'll be fighting against Konoha shinobi! I'm not going to need them!"

"Not even once?" he asked in exasperation. Was she really planning to fight a Hyuga bare-handed!? He was a civilian, and he had heard the rumours of how powerful they were in short-range combat.

"Yeah," she softly added. "And they cost a bit," she finally supplied. "I don't need them," she shook her head.

He rolled his eyes. "Too late for that," he retorted. "I do have them already bought and packed after all."

She flinched and looked at him. "B-But!"

"Oh, enough of that," he retorted. "I got a raise already, apparently 'dedication to a hoodlum' like you works well enough that the Hokage decided I needed one to take care of you. So enjoy your bonus," he carefully used his right hand to grip on the bundle packed with assorted weaponry that could kill a man, and then stopped midway.

He was handing over dangerous and highly lethal equipment to Naruko.

Then again, she was a Kunoichi.

Then again, she was a kid.

Then again, she needed them.

Then again, they were dangerous and lethal.

"No using them in the house," he added as his brain decided to compromise. "And no using them in my presence, understood?"

Naruko nodded numbly as she accepted the package.

"Oh…and Happy Birthday in advance," he carefully added. "Since you didn't want me to find out your parents' names…I needed something else. I know it's not that much but…"

Naruko swallowed heavily, and then…ah darn it.

There went the waterworks again.

"Must you always cry when I give you a birthday gift? Really?" he sighed in mock-exasperation as he ruffled the girl's head with his right hand. "Is that a tradition of sorts for you?"

"B-But Aniki's…"

She shook her head slowly. "I wasn't crying. It's the food's fault. It's spicy."

He snorted. "You like spicy."

"Too spicy."

"All right then," he softly muttered. "I'm sure you'll do great, so bring home a Chuunin vest, all right?"

She nodded, before whispering. "You can count on it, Aniki…dattebayo!"

Such normal days…would not last.

Unfortunately, the day of the Tournament…soon arrived.


	36. White-Eying

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Six

Then, of course, the Tournament came around. Time flied, and by the time the day came he was both worried —since it was Naruko's test to become a Chuunin— and relaxed —since it _was_ Naruko.

Naruko wasn't in a hurry, and neither was he, so they ate breakfast calmly. To check in the archives, he'd wait until his arm healed before trying once more. He was supposed to be going to the arena with Anko —whom he hadn't seen for an entire month, apparently still 'punished' by Ibiki— and so he waved goodbye to Naruko who had to go there early because she had to hear the rules and 'stay in line' whatever it meant.

When the purple haired Kunoichi did not appear, he sighed and went to the arena anyway. The seats were numbered, and as he sat down ready to enjoy the matches…he found himself surrounded.

_By Hyuga._

He checked the seat once more. Yes, it was the right one.

So why did he have the feeling that Hiashi Hyuga was _particularly_ gazing at him with a venomous look?

Hinata sat down next to him. So…wasn't he supposed to have Anko on the other side? No, apparently…apparently he was supposed to be surrounded by Hyuga. Harsh, glaring Hyuga with creepy white eyes. What had he done of evil in the world?

A tiny voice in the back of his head began to ponder on the situation, as time passed and the Uchiha had yet to show.

"Aniki-san," Hinata said carefully. "Naruko-chan is my important friend."

He nodded slowly.

"So, when I heard how she wanted to bathe with you, I was glad when you refused."

He nodded again, then he stilled. Wait. How did she? Was she spying on him? Was that the reason he felt watched!? Damn the Byakugan and its creepiness. Was any place safe from their gaze!?

"However, I understand that she might come on you strongly again, and I simply must prevent this…for her good," there was a quiet moment of silence as he blinked and brought his right hand to his temples. Really? The stalker was…then again, it did make sense that he felt watched.

"So I have taken the liberty of finding a place in the Hyuga compound big enough for you, your girlfriend and Naruko," she added then.

He stared at her. "You paid Anko off with Dango to get her to swap spots and bring me here in the middle of the Hyuga rows, didn't you?"

"Two tons," Hinata replied with a small bashful smile. "I think of Naruko fondly as part of my family," her smile now became something short of a serial killer, "And I'm sure you'll agree that family should stay together."

"Ehm…but I'm fine where I am," he replied nervously. "And there's really no need to go to such lengths. You could visit for sleepovers? Or Naruko could?" why did it feel as if he was surrounded by the Mafia? The White-Eyed Mafia? Technically, all they needed would be a matching Tattoo and they'd all have the requisites for being Yakuza, that and sheer loyalty to their Oyabun.

The entire branch-family sneezed. Hiashi made a polite sneeze too.

Shinku looked around perplexed for just a second…was the hay season still going strongly?

"So I can trust Aniki-san not to do something bad to Naruko-chan?" Hinata asked then slowly. "Because there is a Juuken strike I know of," she added softly, "it can make it drop."

"Make what dr—" he exhaled slowly.

"Really?" he asked then, realizing just 'what' it was about they were talking.

"Yep!" Hinata cheerfully smiled.

Shinku shook his head. He was the one who had to deal with the madness, wasn't he?

Finally, after nearly half an hour, they decided to begin the matches.

He closed his eyes half of the time, because really…they were _vicious_. He would have cheered, but Naruko was taking hits rather than delivering them. Just in what had her sensei trained her!? Sure, she did use the kunai —that the other side deflected bare handed! How could that boy do that!? And even the wire meant nothing when the boy could just slice it through with chakra-enhanced hands.

He was actually wondering if Hyuga's were 'normal' or merely monsters, what with their creepy white eyes and whatnot.

Furthermore, he wasn't a shinobi, so he had no idea what the two were talking of down in the arena, or why the boy had taken off his forehead protector. He did hear a soft 'Neji-nii' from Hinata by his side, but he let it be.

Naruko then said something else, and they battled again. He brought a hand to his throat as Naruko fell limp on the ground. Really! There was a limit! He felt sorry for Naruko.

The girl had tried her best, he was sure of it…but…but she didn't have to try that hard for him. It was all right to stop. He…he didn't want her hospitalized to get that vest. She could do well as a Genin again for another month, really!

And then Naruko stood up once again. She stood up and she charged ahead, creating more clones than before. He winced as he saw them detonate, one after the other, until in the end…another Naruko emerged from the ground and sent Neji flying in the air, before slamming him on the ground.

The match was over.

Naruko had won.

He blinked as he stared wide-eyed at such a scene. He would have clapped, but he didn't have both hands available.

Hinata _was_ clapping in his place excitedly.

Naruko was breathing raggedly, as she looked through the crowd for her Aniki.

Finally, her eyes settled on him —why did he end up surrounded by the Hyuga, she had no clue— and she sent him a thumb-up.

He answered with one of his own.

She smiled brightly at that, before heading off towards the contestants' box. She gave one more look towards her Aniki and blinked. There was some sort of 'shark-fin' coloured pink that was nearing her Aniki from the sides, albeit it was more aptly to call it a pink-haired bunch of hair. She tried to yell to get her Aniki's attention, but it was too late.

The Pink-Shark pounced on her Aniki and with a startled yelp, Shinku found himself cradling the purring form of Sakura on his lap.

"Onii-sama," Sakura said huskily. "I looked everywhere for you!"

Sakura then yelped, being pinched on the buttocks by Hinata who was instead calmly sipping tea.

"Please refrain from sexually harassing my ticket to Naruko-chan's room."

Shinku sweat dropped. Was that what he was seen as?

Sakura still settled on his lap, albeit with a far more chastised look than before. Hinata sighed in relief. The Hyuga girl was coming out of her shell pretty nicely…but Shinku had to wonder just why he couldn't have a normal day, once in a while.

The next matches went by until Sasuke's own began. There, something strange happened midway through it, because the Sunagakure shinobi —a red haired guy he had never seen before— started to…well, morph?

The next instant, a flock of chickens had probably lost all of its feathers because…why was he feeling so sleepy?

When he woke again, it was to Hinata pressing a hand against his side and muttering 'Kai'…and Sakura trying to get a hand in his pants.

"Sakura!" he exclaimed in shock.

"What!? Onii-sama wasn't answering. And silence is 'Yes'." She nodded firmly.

He swallowed. He had to make sure she never slipped him something in his drinks then…he shuddered. Just how far the deep end had Sakura gone?

He blinked, and then he stared wide-eyed as a bunch of enemy shinobi came crashing down as the Kage Box detonated and all around him…

There was war?

War?

They were fighting?

It was strangely ironic, but being in the middle of the Hyuga rows meant one thing: he was in an iron barrel.

Now, if it weren't for Sakura still trying to make babies with him, he'd also _feel_ safe.

"Why don't you go and help Naruko?" he offered to the girl who pouted, but disappeared a moment later.

He sighed in relief.

"Ko-san?" Hinata said then. "Please, bring Aniki-san to safety," she added to another Hyuga. "Do kill whoever harms a hair of his."

"Y-Yes, Hinata-sama."

Shinku swallowed nervously.

Everything was going to turn out fine, right?


	37. Finding

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Seven

The Village was in tatters after the invasion. The Third Hokage was dead. The majority of the buildings crumbled or turned to rubble.

The attack had come from both Suna and Oto, led by Orochimaru. Naruko had apparently stopped the bulk of the invasion herself, by battling against the Sunagakure Jinchuuriki.

Yet he couldn't help but feel there was something behind it, because every time he asked her to tell him how it had gone by…she blushed and looked elsewhere.

He was currently carrying a bucket of water to the workers, as well as a backpack filled with provisions —the fact he still had a hand in the cast meant he couldn't do much work, and until the Academy was rebuilt, there wasn't much of a purpose at him dilly-dallying around the house.

He gasped for breath halfway through, but trudged on. It still was exercise, of some sorts. He was glad his apartment hadn't been hit —then again, it was in the low side of Konoha, and that had been largely left unscathed.

"Do you need a hand?" he turned his gaze to the side, where a burly looking mason was currently looking back at him.

"Ah…Yes?"

The man grabbed his bucket of water, and he exhaled in relief as he began to trudge along.

"Food for the workers?"

"Yeah," he exhaled between ragged breaths. "You big guys sure eat a lot."

The man chuckled. "That we do! Then again, Konoha will be up in no-time thanks to us!"

"Good. To. Hear." He muttered, wheezing. "How far…is it, still?"

"Not far, not far at all!" the worker laughed as he began to whistle. How could some people just stave off the sweat and the heat and everything else…

He was half-destroyed by the time he reached the workers' main 'camp'. The unloading took little less than a minute and then he dropped dead on a bench.

The Hokage's tower had been slightly damaged, and the library was…

He shook his head.

It wasn't as if…

He stood up and sighed. Well, it never hurt to try again —and the archives were bound to be cooler than the outside beneath the sun.

There was actually no one inside. He supposed that, since he wasn't stopped, even his 'Anbu' guard had gone to help the others rather than stick to him.

He groaned as he watched the door to the archives bolted shut. There really wasn't a way through, was there?

The only things that remained scattered around were the books tied to the history of Konoha —which were public knowledge— the story of the Elemental Countries —again, public knowledge— and the story of the countries that surrounded the Land of Fire.

It wasn't as if he'd just have to flip open a history book and flip it through for Uzumaki in the index…it would be preposterous to find something…

He actually stilled.

_Uzumaki Mito. See Page 131, Konoha History._

_**What**_.

He flipped the page. Uzumaki Mito, married to Hashirama Senju, first Hokage. He exhaled. Of course, that was the history of Konoha wasn't it? Hashirama, battling the Kyuubi controlled by Madara Uchiha and then founding…no.

Wait a moment.

The founding of the village came before.

Senju and Uchiha were allies. Senju married Uzumaki _**then**_ Madara attacked with the Kyuubi.

Now, the Kyuubi was sealed into Naruko…and how exactly had the Sandaime put it? 'The girl's chakra is what keeps it at bay, because it's special'?

He was grasping at straws but…The Kyuubi _was_ captured by Mito Uzumaki, wasn't it? It was written in the history book. Then…it had gone down the line.

Uzumaki…they came from Uzushiogakure.

He flipped through the pages…Uzushiogakure was destroyed in the third shinobi war.

If someone had been brought to Konoha beforehand…

He blinked and then carefully stood up. He walked leisurely towards the carton-boxes that held the Academy's rosters, which had been taken and brought in the library for safeguarding.

Slowly, he began to flip through the yearbooks.

He had all the day after all, and how difficult would it be to find…

_There!_

He stopped.

He blinked to make sure he was right.

A red haired girl with puffy cheeks stared back at him, with violet eyes. Scribbled beneath it was the name 'Uzumaki Kushina'. She was the _only_ _Uzumaki_ in the entire academy of the previous years and of the future ones.

However her name wasn't present on the written roster. But _nobody_ had checked the class picture. _The name had been removed_.

There _had_ to be a reason for it.

He began to sweat, and not from the heat. It couldn't be that easy, could it?

"Ah the Red Hot Habanero!" the old croon of a librarian snapped behind him, making him jump in fright. The old crone had a long nose and a pair of thick eyeglasses. "I remember her! She came in a fury over a hundred times!"

"Ah, really?" he said carefully, dropping the picture back in the middle of the others. "You wouldn't know if…if she had kids, or if she's still alive?"

"Afraid not," the librarian sighed. "She always went around with that blond kiddo over there," she pointed at another picture, one of a certain Minato Namikaze. "I think they were pretty much settled together, once I saw them leave with over a dozen books about baby care, so they probably tied the knot…if you know what I mean," the old crone said with a conspiratorial tone.

Minato Namikaze…

Wasn't that the name of the Yon…

He felt the spit in his throat choke as his eyes began to water. "I…I see."

"Good!" the old crone said with a smile that clearly didn't belong on an old lady's face. "Now, how about you go outside and help someone else, uh, Haruno-san?"

He nodded. He didn't even care to know how the old lady knew his surname, but he simply nodded and left in a hurry.

He didn't even turn around, because if he had…he'd have seen the old lady puff in smoke, to leave Jiraiya of the Sannin in place with a brief smirk plastered on his face.

He rubbed his hands together. "Very well…ahah…let's see him deal with this then! HE wants the guardianship? Let's see him face this!"


	38. Mourning

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Naruko Uzumaki was the daughter of the Yondaime Hokage and of Kushina Uzumaki.

She was the daughter of the Yondaime Hokage.

The girl who was currently trying to get a reaction out of his seemingly transfixed gaze was the daughter of the Yondaime.

The man who had sealed the Kyuubi into her.

They had to be bullshitting him.

"Aniki?" Naruko asked softly, touching the side of his cheek with her index. "Ehi, Aniki? You home in there?"

He blinked and then looked towards Naruko. He closed his eyes and then sighed, shaking his head. He slumped back down against the sofa, letting his mind filter through his thoughts.

There was simply no way Naruko was the daughter of the Yondaime. Someone else was bound to know and make a fuss of it, right?

It just wasn't possible for people not to know! The Yondaime having a daughter, and that old woman at the library…clearly, they had to know! Yet nobody else had dared go near the girl? Really? He was the only one? Was that why the Hokage had been worried? HE supposed…he supposed that if he asked Naruko to do something, the girl would probably comply.

He supposed…he supposed that being there for her since the beginning, he wondered…would she even go as far as betraying the village, if he asked her to?

Not that he wanted to leave Konoha: it was his home, and frankly, he had nowhere else to go.

"Aniki?" Naruko asked softly once more. "You all right?"

No, he wasn't all right. He knew something he would have gone better without. He knew something that…that couldn't be right but…

He didn't know what to do.

Was he supposed to tell her? Was he supposed to keep it hidden?

Naruko ended up sitting on his lap as he was lost in thoughts. He huffed: the girl was heavy now. He remembered when she was but five, far —far— lighter than now.

"Aniki," Naruko pouted. "Are you thinking I'm fat?"

He carefully began to sweat as he turned his face to the side, keeping his eyes closed.

He felt her squirm on his lap a moment more, before he heard the flipping of a book. He slowly opened an eye and then the other, before realizing he was staring at the back of Naruko's head as the girl was reading on his lap.

"Chapter Twelve: of the Chrysanthemum family and its proprieties…" Naruko said softly. "It is known as the flower of the Daimyo, used to show his possession of things and of whom the name is given to his throne and crest. The family of the Chrysanthemum comprehends flowers like the meagre looking Daisy to mightier and more fragrant looking ones that hold colours ranging from pure snow white to…"

"Orange and crimson red," he finished. "I'm trying to think Naruko."

"About what?" Naruko pouted, not moving from his lap but letting her legs dangle. "I can help you, you know? Is it about the money for the rent? But, they told everyone they weren't due anything until Konoha went back in business! If the landlord is trying to short-change you Aniki, I'll take care of him Dattebayo!"

"No," he chuckled. "It's not about that."

"Uhm…are you thinking on getting ramen for dinner then?" she asked hopefully.

"No," he retorted. "It's not that."

"You're going to ask Anko to marry you, Aniki?" Naruko said then.

He sputtered and shook his head. "No!"

"Good," Naruko huffed. "Better that way."

He blinked. "Why?"

"Aniki has to find someone better than her," she nodded to herself. "She'll just lead you astray! Yeah! And it's just like Hokage-Jiji said: you should know better…yeah… 'ttebayo…" her voice grew quieter. "Aniki?"

"Yes?"

"I miss Jiji," Naruko murmured. "He was…super strong, the Hokage and…and he's dead…right?" there were tears in her eyes.

He remained quiet.

"I…I never thought he'd die like that," Naruko muttered. "I mean…I fought Gaara, I pummelled him to the ground. Everything else was supposed to be easy right? But then…but then he died and…and there was nothing. I mean, if the Hokage can die…" her voice cracked. "I don't want to be alone, Aniki. Gaara…if you hadn't been there, if Jiji hadn't been there…I would have been like him, Aniki…and he was mad…"

She trembled slightly. "Please," she pleaded. "Don't go anywhere, _please_," she was actually pleading him with the bottom of her heart. "_Please don't leave me alone_."

He swallowed quietly, letting his right arm circle around Naruko's shoulders as he hugged her closer. He dropped his chin on her head, exhaling.

The book dropped from Naruko's hands, as her trembling form seemed so tiny in that instant. Really, it was in moments like these that he realized she was nothing more than a little girl. Shinobi weren't supposed to show their emotions, but Naruko held hers on her sleeve. Really…she was everything but a shinobi.

"Hush," he muttered. "I'm not going anywhere."

"You say that, Jiji said that too, but Jiji's dead!" she yelled back. "And…and you've got a broken arm and it's still not healed! I…You can't die. Just…just swear it, please?"

"I already did more than once," he sighed in exasperation. "I understand you're scared, but…I'm really not going to end up anywhere, Naruko. Just trust me on this, can't you believe in me, like I believe in you?"

"Promise?" Naruko muttered.

"Promise," he exhaled rolling his eyes. "Are we done crying now?"

Naruko nodded slowly, before gripping tightly on his shirt and pressing herself closer to his chest. Exhausted, she fell asleep a moment later.

She had probably spent the entire day going around Konoha helping whomever she could, if the signs on her hands were of any indication. She was too much of a worrywart for her own good. Always caring for others and never for herself.

"What am I going to do with you, Naruko," he sighed.

Unfortunately…he would never have an answer to that question.


	39. Buying

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Thirty-Nine

"Neh, Aniki?" Naruko began, hesitantly looking towards him with her cerulean eyes that sparkled. "Where is Anko?"

He blinked back. "I think we broke off once more. Or Ibiki just held her prisoner as punishment in the T&I department."

Naruko nodded. "What of Sakura?"

"I think I saw her rummaging in my trash this morning," he shuddered. "Then again, I think I also saw Hinata rummaging through yours. They stroke up quite the friendship," he felt a deathly chill settle on his back, the same that was running through Naruko's since the girl trembled too.

"Aniki?"

"Yes?"

"Are we the only two normal people left?"

He shook his head. "There's Ayame, isn't there?"

Naruko grimaced. "She was no longer the same after the talk," she muttered.

He froze. "I see."

"She decided to go on a trip to improve her cooking," Naruko supplied.

"Good for her," he acquiesced. He hummed as he grabbed his cup of tea and sat down at the table, flipping through the pages of his latest book.

The clock on the wall began to tick.

"Aniki?"

"Yes?"

"I need a favour," she turned slightly red.

He raised an eyebrow.

"I mean…I think it's normal…and I…I need…" she stammered out, blushing heavily. "Underwear." She squeaked that word out looking down to the floor and fidgeting.

He slowly closed his eyes, before placing a footnote in his book.

"You…want…moral support?" he hazarded, receiving a tiny nod in reply.

"Me?" he asked once more, feeling his saliva nearly choke him.

She nodded, completely red…

In moments like those…Shinku felt like a single father. Thank Kami the 'talk' on tampons had been done by Ayame. He wracked his brain.

"Why not ask Sakura?"

"She doesn't have anything yet…what does she know?"

Sakura sneezed.

"And why would I know anything about…bras?" he actually choked saying that word.

"Well," Naruko looked sideways. "You're a man right, Aniki? So…you know what's nice…yeah?"

"I…don't think…it works like that," was it getting hot in the apartment? It had to be the tea. "I…suppose…why not Hinata?"

"She kept touching them during the last sleepover," Naruko muttered. "I'm not going to ask her!"

He hung his head and took a deep breath. "Very well then," he stood up. "I don't know if we'll find a shop still intact but…we'll find something, I'm sure of it."

Naruko squeaked a hasty 'dattebayo' as she stood up. It wasn't that late in the evening, and a few shops were indeed still open.

He actually had to push Naruko inside —the girl was absolutely refusing to take another step midway through.

"Maybe Aniki it's not a really nice idea oh hell why did you _bring-me-here-i-want-to-go-home_ please!" she squeaked as the attendant —a normal looking lady in her thirties— came forward with a small smile.

"May I help?"

He sighed in relief. "She needs a…bra."

Naruko was literally steaming from her ears.

He wanted _really_ to be elsewhere.

"Of course! Have they just recently started to grow?"

The problem with lingerie shops —Shinku soon realized— was that there wasn't a 'safe' spot to gaze at. Everything was 'dangerous' and 'perverted' to gaze at for long. Naruko was whisked away by the attendant, and thankfully all he had to do was wait watching the floor or the surface of the counter.

It was then that he actually slammed his hand against his face.

"Anbu guard?" he muttered carefully.

Silently, the Cat Masked Anbu appeared from the shadows. "Yes?"

So Kakashi's words actually worked!

"You take care of this," he finally wheezed out. "I'll wait outside." He left his wallet on the counter and moved out, leaving behind the flabbergasted Cat-Masked Kunoichi who found herself soon…assaulted, by Naruko.

Shinku breathed in relief outside.

Five minutes later, and Naruko dropped down next to him, holding both his wallet and a plastic bag with her…purchases.

The cat masked Anbu actually glared at him before disappearing in the shadows once more.

"I nearly forgot about her," he muttered. "Anbu sure are good at their jobs."

"Ehi, Aniki," Naruko dropped her head against his shoulder, letting her legs dangle. "Ero-sennin said we have to go looking for the new Hokage soon…I'll be away for two weeks," she grabbed his arm. "Can I ask you something?"

He looked at her and raised an eyebrow, before nodding.

"I know you'll be here when I'll be back, so…can you water the plants while I'm gone?"

He chuckled and ruffled her hair. "Like I do every day?"

"It's not my fault," she complained. "I'm busy working!"

"Me too," he softly added. "Well…can't help it if you're leaving…let me guess, tomorrow?"

She flushed red and nodded.

"Why am I not surprised? Always thinking things at the last minute. Come on then, let's go…"

"Uh? Where?"

"To get a Bento Box, what else? At least you'll have something to eat on the road the first day that isn't cup ramen."

She smiled brightly at that and jumped up in a second. "Can I have a box with toads on it, Aniki!? Maybe one with really badass and cool toads, like, with scars and swords and…"

He rolled his eyes as he smiled. That was something he could deal with easily. As they began to walk towards the shop, Naruko grabbed his hand as if to hurry him along. He actually realized it midway towards the shop that Naruko's grip on his hand had taken on a softer approach and she was now walking next to him.

"Aniki?" she muttered. "People are looking at me strangely."

He frowned and looked around as he felt Naruko grip fiercely on his arm. Sure, there were a few persons talking to one another while eying them, but from what he was hearing…

'She's the one who took down that monster outside.'

'Eh, maybe she wasn't as rotten as I thought.'

'You think that boy is her guardian?'

'Maybe that's why she stopped pranking! You think I can have his number? He looks kind of hot…and he must be good with babies…'

He actually shuddered…

He supposed that, just as he had been slightly glared at for being close to Naruko once…now that some were looking at Naruko in a different light…the same applied to him?

Naruko puffed her chest out —she had probably heard. "That's right 'ttebayo," she murmured as she walked next to him. "And Aniki's mine," she added then. "He's my family," she muttered. "Let them find their own," she grumbled then as her ears seemed to catch on far more comments of the crowd than him.

He nervously chuckled.

He remembered Naruko being clingy when she was young —she cherished physical contact of any type, happily purring every instant he patted her head— but he had hoped it was just a phase.

Then again, she did have that mania of sitting on his lap whenever she wanted to read something.

She would be gone for two weeks.

More than enough time to think about telling her or not of her parents…and to decide whether to change apartments or not. Houses cost had plummeted after all, since they were being rebuilt cheaply by shinobi —one in particular was nicknamed 'Woody' and was pretty much called for building nearly all of the houses.

Somewhere, Yamato felt a deep unsettling chill reach his entire spine and grab it, as if the shinigami was twisting it for his own enjoyment.

On the plus side, he was getting a lot of money from Ranked missions.


	40. Deciding

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty

The New Hokage, as Naruko told him once she returned from her mission with her sensei, was someone she had nicknamed Baa-chan.

He swallowed nervously.

He knew he should do something about it. Really, why did he have to be called into the office of the Godaime Hokage first thing first?

Couldn't he have, like, a few days of mental preparation?

He stepped inside just in time to be on the receiving end of an empty sake bottle and a scream of "YOU BRAT!"

He brought a hand up to massage the bruise on his forehead, and blinked when he saw a brunette walking slowly towards him, hands glowing softly green as she took care of the bruise with a soft smile. As if to say 'sorry, it's normal, get used to it'.

Naruko was jumping around, screaming 'Baa-chan!' and the Godaime was pursuing while yelling 'you brat'.

"ANIKI! PROTECT ME FROM WRINKLE-KAGE!" Naruko screamed, jumping behind him. She grabbed tightly onto the back of his jacket, as if she could use it to hide her presence.

"YOU BRAT!" the Godaime Hokage huffed, but stopped her onslaught. Shinku carefully pried his eyes open once more, hoping the scene he had seen had merely been a hallucination from overworking.

The Godaime had her face covered in black dots and her breath heavy with alcohol. She was also sporting the most massive pair of breasts he had ever seen, and it was a miracle, that she could walk without suffering from back pains. Her blond pigtails hung behind her back, and she was wearing a green mantle that had the kanji 'Gambler' on the back.

There was a moment of silence as he stood there, eying the dark haired woman who had healed him.

She looked back at him and…there was a spark.

A spark of _understanding_.

"I…I'm Shizune Kato," the woman said with a slight blush. "Still single, still looking." She added then.

"I'm…Shinku Haruno," he replied. "Brother of this brat over here," he patted Naruko's head.

"I'm the guardian of that one over there," she replied pointing at the Godaime, who sported a tick mark.

"Shizune!"

"Hai, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune said with a bright smile.

"Is there more sake around here?"

"I'll go and look for it, Tsunade-sama!" just as she turned to leave, she winked at Shinku and mouthed. "Call me," before disappearing through the door.

Shinku would have face-palmed; if not for the fact, his only good hand was grabbed roughly by Naruko, who pulled him closer to the Godaime.

"So Baa-chan! Fix him!"

Tsunade grumbled, as she suddenly was far too close for Shinku's personal tastes. It took the woman a minute to break the cast and then start looming over his broken arm with her hands covered in soft green chakra.

"Don't use the arm too much in the next hours," she finally commented. "And it will be as good as new."

He stared dumbfounded at his arm, flexing his fingers slowly. "T-Thank you?"

"You're welcome," Tsunade snorted. "Whoever suffers the brat must either have a strong will or a large liver for alcohol."

He chuckled nervously. "Naruko's a good girl deep down," he absent-mindedly patted Naruko's head. "Hokage-sama…was the reason you called me here this?"

"The Brat did not stop once in the entire trip," Tsunade hissed out. "Not once, _in two weeks_, did she stop harassing me about healing your broken arm. I had to suffer through her bouts of Aniki this and Aniki that, so let me make it perfectly clear…" she jabbed her finger towards his chest. "You will _never_ break a limb again…I won't stand her whining and pouting incessantly anymore, understood!?"

"H-Hai, Hokage-sama!"

"Now, Naruko? Out of the office, your Aniki and I have to talk."

Naruko pouted. "Why is it always like that…" she grumbled as she slowly walked outside. The moment the door closed, the Godaime returned serious.

He swallowed once more nervously.

"While the brat might be annoying," Tsunade stated, "It is far more interesting your own opinion of the girl."

He raised an eyebrow.

"She did defeat the Jinchuuriki of the Ichibi, as I'm sure everyone around town already knows," Tsunade rolled her eyes. "Power-side, she is a Chuunin however…" Tsunade sighed. "I have nothing but the reports of the Academy's teachers and the shinobi who are biased against her for her mental side. Even though many retracted their previous statements, they reek of 'over glorifying' her for the position."

The amber eyes of the Hokage settled on him. "Which is why…I want your opinion, 'Aniki'." She smirked. "The Chuunin rank is not something easily given. It requires a cool head and the attitude for command. The missions will increase in risk and reward accordingly, but if she does not possess enough of a cold attitude with dealing with unexpected situations…she might very well lead her team to death."

The Godaime couldn't possibly be telling him to tell her about Naruko, right? She couldn't be asking him if the girl…how could she expect him to be…

Naruko wanted to become Hokage. She wanted desperately to be known, to be seen…she wanted to become Chuunin with all her heart but…but the Godaime was asking him?

A cool head…Naruko didn't have one. She was impulsive, irrational most of the time and…and she was just a child at heart. He wasn't supposed to be the one to decide.

"Naruko…she has a lot of good qualities," he began softly. "She's got a big heart and it's really easy for her to forgive everyone but…but she still acts before thinking, sure…she can come up with smart plans on the go hearing her talk of her exploits at home and she did survive an A-rank mission, always hearing her…but…but I'm not qualified to make this decision, Hokage-sama. You should ask her sensei rather than me."

"I would…but he was knocked out cold until recently," Tsunade scoffed. "Two missing Nin attacked him in broad daylight within the village…you didn't hear about that?"

He frowned. "No…" he swallowed. "I'm sorry to hear that."

"Don't be, I set him straight," Tsunade remarked. "So, she's got a big heart but no brains uh?"

"That is a bit harsh," he tried hesitantly to say.

"No, no, got the general idea." She nodded firmly to herself. "You're dismissed."

He awkwardly nodded and left from the door.

Tsunade rolled her eyes. "Jiraiya? On one side, I have a pervert with white hair who flung his goddaughter down a crevice after not even caring for her once. On the other I have this young civilian who's scared of his own shadow."

Jiraiya popped up from behind a corner, his head hung low.

"You really are sure about it?" he asked with his lips trembling. "Can't I get another chance, Tsunade-chaan!?"

A fist sent him to crash against the wall.

"No, it's decided." She huffed. "Really…should have done it before."

And with that, she returned to stamping documents.

**Author's notes**

**And here canon diverges as Naruko gets her Yondaime heredity and becomes ultra powerful unlocking her secret Doujutsu of doom while Aniki reveals his hidden Uchiha self with the ultra-special Mangekyou version that can make butterflies shoot rainbows…**

**If you read the previous lines straight-faced, you need to check your eyes. Nothing overtly important from canon changes. Aye…I'm doing this for the Fluff!**

**Isn't it fluffy?!**


	41. Ending

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-One

"Aniki! I'm going on a C-rank!"

"Aniki, I'm going on a C-rank again!"

"Aniki, I did a C-rank and…"

Every. Single. Mission.

Every single mission Naruko took that was beyond D-rank turned into a mess of such epic proportions he actually had taken medical pills to calm down after he heard from the mission office how they turned worse. The positive thing was that the Anbu guard had finally been dropped —Orochimaru had lost interest, and the Anbu was needed elsewhere to do missions for the benefit of the village.

He was actually glad he only felt watched during the day hours now, and only by Hinata who was easy to knock out.

He did carry the dirty laundry of Naruko sometimes out of the window to dry…and there _always_ was a fountain of blood afterwards from behind a corner.

"So, this time, you battled against a Jounin from Amegakure who fought back using the Raijin no Ken, the weapon of the Nidaime known to make the user invincible in battle?"

"YEAH!" Naruko exclaimed.

"Tell me again," he said quietly, "Who is the one assigned to giving out mission scrolls?"

"Iruka-sensei, Aniki."

Iruka suddenly felt a terrible chill throughout his spine, as he imagined a number appear atop his head and incredibly spin downwards to reach the zero. The shadows around him morphed to display frying pans, and he had the inkling sensation…he would not survive the end of the week.

"Ah," Shinku smiled. "I'll have a talk with him."

"Anyway, it was awesome 'ttebayo!" she clapped her hands, "And then I also helped Ibiki find his younger brother! Oh, but I wasn't supposed to say that so keep it a secret all right!?"

He nodded. He suspected that if someone ever captured Naruko, they'd know the ins and outs of Konoha within the next hour…provided they knew to deliver Ramen to the girl.

He looked towards the wall of the apartment, gazing softly at the board he had set up after Naruko had decided to take pictures of her missions —to show them off to him. In one, she had a heavy dose of make-up, and was making the peace sign together with the princess-actress from the Land of Snow, Yukie Fujikaze, while in another, she was making a victory sign together with the folks from the land of tea.

He exhaled in relief and then shook his head. "Oh, right," he said then. "This arrived in the mail," he carefully took out a thick carton package, which was filled to the brim with papers.

"While you were away, I had the time to compile them all," he added to the curious look of Naruko. He took out his pen and dropped it in front of Naruko. "If…if you want, you can sign these and I'll become your guardian henceforth."

Naruko's mouth hung loose for a moment, before she grabbed the pen as fast as she could and began to scribble down her name on each dotted line.

He sweat dropped. Wasn't she going to read them at least?

When the last paper was signed, Naruko looked at him expectantly. He shuffled the papers back in order, and then closed the package.

"So…you're my Aniki forever-ever now?" Naruko said with her eyes sparkling.

He smiled. "Yep."

The next moment she clung to his neck like a monkey, "ALL RIGHT!" she screamed literally in his ears, making him wobble. Thankfully, he was still sitting or he'd have fallen like a bag of potatoes —he actually wondered how fast she had moved to get to that position. "Are we going to celebrate Aniki? Wait, should I call you Onii-san now? Nah! Maybe I can call you Onii-chan? Eh? How about it, Aniki? Nah! I'll stick to Aniki cause it's cooler and Aniki's cool like that and…" he nearly choked from lack of air when Naruko hugged him tightly.

She actually began to _bounce_ all over the place.

He sweat-dropped. It wasn't as if anything was going to change. Things would pretty much remain the same, as they always were… it just made them official.

And considering he was her guardian, while 'father' was the more apt term…he wasn't that old.

Still, to the system, it counted precisely like that…and single Civilian fathers with a shinobi or kunoichi off spring were entitled to tax benefits and discounts to buy specific goods —namely weapons, tags, and had the low percentage on loans to buy a new house in the shinobi sector.

That was still a few years along the way —he did need a higher stipend before even touching the word 'loan'— but it didn't matter at the present.

He was glad Naruko was taking the news well.

Now, he just had to tell her about her real parents.

"Oh right! I forgot!" Naruko said with a bright smile, "I've got to tell Sakura! We're family now, right!?"

That actually was true. "I suppose…she's your…"

"I have a sister now too! How cool!" and then, Naruko flew out of the door leaving him with his mouth ajar.

He chuckled to himself. Really…

Elsewhere, Sasuke Uchiha had knocked out Sakura and laid her body on a bench. Really, to go as far as claim he just needed to 'chill' and believe everything would turn out fine…

He had an older brother to kill and a clan to avenge.

He would take up Orochimaru's offer, but before that…

Naruko had dared to tell him she understood his pain. Her!? She knew _nothing_. She had just a fake brother who wasn't even tied by blood. What did she know of losing her family? She had none to begin with. He'd show her.

He knew where to find the man, Sakura was always so overzealous about his 'movements' that it made him retch. Really, she was far more annoying about her Onii-sama then she had been as a fan girl. His sharingan uncovered, he knocked at the door of 'Aniki'.

When the man opened the door…

He _struck_.

Naruko would feel the pain of losing her bonds to her family, and then, only then, would she understand his own pain…

Yes.

That was the perfect plan.

**Author's notes**

**The entire series was just a massive sucker punch to end in angst with this chapter.**

**Shinku's dead. Sorry folks.**

…

**Joking. Though this *is* a slight variation from canon, but it's because I feel…well, Sasuke always looked to me as a 'petty' avenger amongst other things. He'd always need to one-up others, and so he is actually striking out of **_**jealousy**_** rather than any ill-conceived plan.**


	42. Believing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Two

Naruko hadn't found Sakura around her usual place —the garbage bins of her house— nor her usual spying area —the nearby rooftop.

She didn't find her, and so she decided to return back home. She'd see Sakura the next day anyway. She jumped down from the rooftop and knocked at the door of the apartment.

The door slid open. Her nose caught the _scent_ first. She knew it by heart. It was the smell of blood. Had her Aniki cut himself? But then again, that smell could only come from an open wound and there was no way he'd…

She suddenly paled, her eyes widening as she entered slamming the door against the wall.

"Aniki?" she asked softly, looking into the dark apartment where…she didn't need to look further away than the entrance.

Her Aniki was there.

Down.

Bleeding.

He wasn't supposed to be bleeding.

He had a kunai piercing his stomach.

He wasn't supposed to have a kunai piercing his stomach.

Her Aniki wasn't supposed to be on the floor bleeding. He wasn't supposed to be breathing raggedly and she did not know what to do _because her Aniki wasn't supposed to be wounded like that because he had promised because he was her_ _aniki-because-she-had-no-idea-what-to-do_…

His hand was still clasping on the kunai, and she had no idea what to do.

Her Aniki was supposed to be smiling at her from the kitchen, telling her he was just done cooking. He was supposed to be looking at her enter the apartment from the couch, with a smile on his face and closing the book he would be reading.

Her Aniki was supposed to cleaning, washing, doing anything but being down on the ground bleeding and dying and leaving her alone.

She looked around, in fright, scared and trembling.

There was no one around to be angered to. Who had done this? Why? She needed to get Aniki to safety first, or he was really going to die… She needed…she needed help, a medic nin. Tsunade-baachan…she could heal him?

She bit down hard on her lips.

Her Aniki needed her _now_, she couldn't be scared. Her hands went through the cross hand seal needed to create a horde of Kage Bunshin, all equally as pale as her from fear.

"GO AND FIND BAA-CHAN, THE HOSPITAL, ANYONE NOW!"

They all went in different directions, scattering themselves across Konoha. She dropped down next to Aniki. Where was the first aid kit? Another clone had taken it and brought it to her. What was she supposed to do? Her hands were trembling. She wasn't used to this.

"Aniki?" she softly whispered, her hands moving to grab his pale and sweating face. "Hey Aniki? Can you hear me!? Please!"

His eyes cracked open slightly. She smiled. "ANIKI! Stay with me, all right! It's going to be all right! Whoever did this won't get away and I swear everything will be fine…"

There were tears dropping down her eyes.

"Na…ruko?"

"I'm here, Aniki. I'm here," she muttered clasping tightly on his blood soaked right hand. "The wound…it's not even big, really…just a graze…it will be healed in no time…"

She pressed the bandages from the first aid kit against it, but stilled as she heard her Aniki groan in pain.

"It's all right! Yeah! Dattebayo, please it's all right! I know it hurts Aniki but it's all right, yeah…" she was sweating and looking from the wound to his face.

Her hands were covered in blood. His blood.

Aniki's blood.

"Naruko…" he wheezed out. "You're…a horrible…liar."

She shook her head strongly. "No, I'm not. You're going to be fine."

"Ah…well…I'll…take a nap…then..." his eyes began to close.

"No! NO! _STAY WITH ME_! Come on, Aniki! Please don't die! _PLEASE_. _**YOU PROMISED**_! You swore! You _**SWORE**_!" Naruko screamed that near Aniki's ears as loud as she could. She just knew she had to keep him awake, or she'd really lose him. "Please, please! I swear I'll be without Ramen for years! Please Kami, please, anyone, anything!"

She slammed her forehead against his head, her nose touching his. "Please…" she whimpered…

"_Please_."

The next instant, she was quickly pushed away by the timely arrival of Tsunade herself.

"Baa-chan…" Naruko murmured softly as she looked at the Godaime groaning at the mess. Tsunade's hands turned green and laced with chakra, as the Hokage began to work on stabilizing the patient.

"You brat," Tsunade muttered. "Really? Can't leave you a few weeks alone? I said no broken limbs? Should have added no lethal wounds either!"

Naruko began to cry in relief. Her Aniki was going to be fine: there was really no doubt about it.

An hour later, she was standing by the side of the hospital's bed where her Aniki was resting after the operation. Her hands were raw with the effort to wash them clean, but as she watched frantically the heartbeat monitor beep up and down, her breath hitched in her throat every time his lungs seemed to take their time between a breath and the other.

He was out of danger, but that didn't mean he'd wake up soon. Still, as she clenched her fists, she looked over him.

The words of Mebuki rung in her head —she hoped they were but lies, but really…how could she prove them such without Aniki's smile telling her it wasn't true?

Baa-chan had told her he'd wake up within another couple of hours, and Kakashi-sensei had even checked in before leaving for a mission somewhere else —something which would take a few hours at most to complete.

It was then, that the door of the room slid open to admit someone she did not like at all.

"Why are you here?" Naruko growled, her gaze on the Jounin in question.

Yuhi Kurenai did not even flinch, but merely looked towards her brother for a moment more. "No reason," she muttered, before walking closer and taking a seat on the other side. "Just…checking on him."

"He's fine, 'ttebayo," Naruko muttered with a pout, gripping tightly on Aniki's hand as if to reassure herself he was still there.

"Did he…say anything?"

"No," she grumbled. "But when I find out who did it, I'll teach them not to meddle with my Aniki."

"Such a protective Imouto," Kurenai said softly. "You're really fond of him, aren't you?"

"He was there for me," Naruko muttered. "Always. Always…he was always there for me and the one time I was supposed to be there…stupid, that's what I am," she slammed her head against the soft side of the mattress. "I shouldn't have left."

"You don't know if you could have helped," Kurenai said, after a moment of silence.

"Aniki had no chances," Naruko murmured bitterly. "It was a shinobi, I'm sure of it…they…maybe they were looking for me? I heard what happened…to Kakashi-sensei and…"

"Trust me," Kurenai replied. "I was there too. If it had been them…I doubt they would have left him like that," the red-eyed woman looked sideways. "Did he have any enemies?"

"No," Naruko shook her head. "No…things were turning out so well…" she sniffled. "I was supposed to be home. It's my entire fault."

"Naruko-chan," Kurenai said quietly. "You can't blame yourself for this. You couldn't have known."

The door slid open once more, making Naruko perk up as she looked at the boy who entered.

It was Shikamaru.

"Troublesome," the boy sighed. "Well…"

"Shika?"

"Sakura was found half an hour ago at the park, she claims Sasuke wanted to run away from Konoha to go to Orochimaru. Also, Sasuke is currently missing from the village and he's probably headed…" he locked eyes with Naruko, "towards the Valley of the End to enter Rice Fields country."

"That Teme!" Naruko clenched her hands. "So…it was Orochimaru? After all, it was him?"

She stood up. "I'm going to shove a kunai through the creepy snake man once and for all! Dattebayo!"

"No," Shikamaru drawled out. "All kunai are registered with a serial number upon their hilt, for storage purposes and to find out wherever the kunai sold is defective or not —it also double as a tracker for which shinobi possess which type of weapon within the village. That specific kunai…it came from Sasuke Uchiha's purchase of two months ago."

Naruko's hands fell limp at her sides.

"That's…bullshit, right?" her face was pale. "Sasuke's a bastard but…but he wouldn't…"

"You'll just have to ask him then," Shikamaru said. "I'm forming up a squad to stop him. We'll probably encounter resistance but we're all the Hokage can spare."

Naruko turned to look towards Kurenai, who grimaced. "Unfortunately, we Jounin have more pressing requests to fulfil…I too cannot waste time…I'm actually late as it is," the woman slowly stood up. "If…If the Uchiha is behind it however," her red eyes shone dangerously as she looked back towards Naruko. "I would not mind…to see his body broken and him returned like a mangled heap of torn muscles and flesh."

And then she strolled out of the window in a flicker.

Naruko grimaced as Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.

"Let's go," Shikamaru said then.

Naruko left last, giving one look towards her Aniki's sleeping form.

"I'll be back soon, Aniki…Dattebayo."

She tied her forehead protector strongly as she followed behind Shikamaru. Her eyes were cold as they departed with the rest of the team chosen for this.

If Sasuke had done it…If Sasuke had harmed her Aniki…

If he had been responsible…

If…If he had…

Then she would bring him back to Konoha with his arms and legs broken to tatters, _pleading_ for mercy.

And she'd force him to apologize to her Aniki.

Or maybe, just maybe…

She'd stick a kunai through his guts to let him feel what it meant to suffer like that.

She clenched her fists as her feet left deep impression on the bark of the wooden branches she ran across.

Nobody harmed her Aniki and walked away unscathed.

_Nobody_.

_Sasuke was going to pay__**.**_

_**DATTEBAYO.**_


	43. Breaking Off

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Three

"_**SASUKE**_!" that scream made him still at the border with the land of Rice Fields, atop the head of Madara Uchiha.

He turned, expecting to see Naruko standing on the other side of the chasm, on the head of Hashirama Senju.

He hadn't expected her covered in a red cloak charging at merely a millimetre from his face with a fist ready to slam home.

Sasuke barely managed to activate his sharingan in time to dodge, but when the fist continued its path and _cracked_ _the ground_…he swallowed.

"Naruko!" he exclaimed, jumping back.

"You…" Naruko hissed, clenching her hands. "You're running away," she added. "You…I would have brought you back…I'm your friend, you're my teammate, one of my precious bonds…" she snarled…the ground around her began to crack. "But…But what you did…that's something…"

Her eyes shone crimson.

"_I can't forgive_."

He dodged the incoming blur of crimson as he shot himself in the water, where Naruko soon followed creating a giant splash. He barely brought up his right arm to parry a blow from his side that Naruko spun and delivered a kick to his ribs, which sent him flying in mid-air.

"Aniki did nothing to you!" she hissed, tears prickling down her eyes. "_WHY DID YOU TRY TO KILL HIM!?_"

He coughed out blood as he wobbled back on his feet.

"Try?" he croaked, "Can you feel it? This pain? This agony? This is what I feel, only worse…you can't understand…I should have killed him, then…then you would have."

"_FOR FUCK'S SAKE TEME!_ You lost your family —I get that! But you can't take mine away! I won't let you! I'll bring you back to Konoha with broken arms if I have to, and when I do I'm gonna make sure you're punished for what you did! I'm not going to lose any of my bonds if I can prevent it!"

Sasuke smirked. "You don't understand…then again…he still lives," the Uchiha murmured. "How about I return, Naruko?"

Her chakra cloak fluttered for a moment. "Uh?"

"Yes, I'll come back to Konoha. I'll be the perfect shinobi…and then, one day, I will walk up to your precious Aniki's house and _I will slice his throat from side to side and let him die like a gutted fish_!"

Naruko's eyes widened for a brief instant, as the air itself seemed to still at such a declaration.

Sasuke wanted to kill her Aniki. Sasuke...Sasuke had to die. It was simple. Really. It was really simple. She was going to kill him.

No, no...she couldn't kill him. She'd make him suffer. Yes. She'd make him feel pain, like her Aniki was in...but she wasn't going to kill him.

"I won't let you," Naruko murmured, her chakra blazing furiously as she took a step forward, the ground quaking and splintering apart. "I won't let anyone do that. Aniki's precious to me, why can't you see that? Why do you have to say that? I'll rip apart your hands then, I'll rip your legs from your body. I'll pluck out your eyes, smash your teeth…and I'll bring you back to Konoha anyway."

Sasuke morphed as his cursed seal evolved to its second level, giant hands resembling wings sprouted from his back.

"See? That pain, that hurt, that anger…that is what guides me, only tenfold! To lose someone hurts! To have revenge, I'll go to Orochimaru. He'll give me power! Enough power to defeat and kill that man!"

"I KNOW THAT IT HURTS!" Naruko screamed. "I lost Jiji! Aniki's one of the few I have left, and he's in the hospital _BECAUSE OF YOU!_" she ground her teeth. "You think it's easy, to forgive you?"

"What?" Sasuke blinked.

"You think it's easy, to forgive you for what you did?" Naruko muttered. "But…Aniki's isn't dead. You can still repent and then, then we can go to eat ramen together, all of us. I'll make sure Aniki doesn't get too mad about you, and he'll forgive you. He forgives me a lot, and then…then he can be your Aniki too! I mean…We could be sib—"

"_DON'T YOU DARE!_" Sasuke's hand shot down, burning fury coursing through his veins. The Chidori formed with a sharp screaming noise. "I have only one brother! _**ONE I MUST KILL**_!"

"_AND I HAVE ONLY ONE BROTHER TOO! __**ONE I MUST PROTECT, DATTEBAYO**__!_"

Naruko's rasengan formed in her hand.

The next moment, they both clashed one against the other.

The two techniques tore at each other with rampant hatred and anger, as Naruko ground her teeth and ploughed forward with all the strength she could muster.

_"What'cha doing?" she had expected to be scorned…when she hadn't, she felt happy._

_"Hey! Want to play with me, mistah?" he said no, but then again he did not leave._

_"Can ya push'me on the swings please?" he said yes, and that was the first time anyone pushed her on a swing._

_"We had brawling lessons!" that was the first time anyone cared to patch her bruises…she kept the Band-Aid for an entire week after that._

She ground her teeth and screamed as she pushed her rasengan forth, forcing Sasuke's own to retreat.

Tears prickled down her eyes, vaporized by the crimson cloak a moment later.

"_If you want, you can sign these and I'll become your guardian henceforth."_

_"I understand you're scared, but…I'm really not going to end up anywhere, Naruko. Just trust me on this, can't you believe in me, like I believe in you?"_

_"Must you always cry when I give you a birthday gift? Really?"_

_"To be abandoned, to be left alone…to feel as if nobody wants you and everyone just pities or mocks you for what you are. You think I'd let anyone else suffer through that?"_

The rasengan tore apart the Chidori, and the next instant…Sasuke ducked, barely avoiding the attack that destroyed his right wing and sent him to slam against the nearby wall of the valley.

"Aniki's…" Naruko muttered. "Aniki has always, _always_, _**always**_ been there for me," she clenched her fists so hard blood began to drip on the water. "What you did…I can forgive you…but I can't forget it," she took a step forward.

"So I'll bring you back to Konoha," she muttered, wobbling on her feet. "And I'll make sure you get your dues. Then…then I don't care if I have to break your spine, but you'll apologize to my brother. You'll apologize to everyone you hurt. And then…then if you want, we'll talk with your brother together…I…Maybe my Aniki isn't my real brother by blood but…but he's precious all the same and if…if the bond we have is the same other share then…then I'm sure we can bring your brother back to Konoha too!"

When the dust settled, and the vision cleared…

Sasuke was no longer in the hole against the side of the valley.

He had run away. The coward had run away from her.

Naruko felt all her anger, all her rage, simply disappear as she fell backwards in the water. She gasped for air as she looked up at the sky.

"Fine…I…" she croaked, feeling extremely weak as she floated there. "When I find you, Teme, next time, I…"

She closed her eyes.

_**I will snap your spine…**_

_**Dattebayo**._

**Author's notes**

**No lethal wound for Naruko.**

**As said before, I'm not changing 'much'. (Hinata wasn't grievously injured by Neji for example)**

**Because everything must hold fluff and happiness.**

**Even breaking Sasuke's spine later on.**


	44. Healing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Four

Naruko blearily opened her eyes to the white ceiling of the hospital. She looked around, trying to find the window and see what time it was, what hour…maybe Aniki was already awake?

She didn't need to look far, since they had apparently placed her in the same room as him.

He was laying on the hospital bed, a book held with his fingers over the top of his chest, his gaze lingering on the pages. He flipped a page.

He had yet to see her, but he was alive and well and that…that made her happy.

He was fine.

She hadn't brought Sasuke back, but her Aniki was still there.

"Aniki," Naruko muttered —well, she croaked that out. She didn't feel pain anywhere, but she did feel tired.

He looked towards her and then smiled, closing the book.

"Hey," he softly said. "Seems like it really was no big deal at all," he added with a light chuckle. "I'll be fine by tomorrow…the Godaime insists I can leave with you tomorrow morning, rather than suffer you in the hospital for more than a day."

Naruko grumbled something about the 'grumpy baa-chan', but he just kept up his hesitant smile. "Naruko…did…did Sasuke harm you?"

"No," she shook her head as she carefully stood to a sitting position on the side of her bed. She bit her lips. "He didn't. I…I don't know about the rest of the team," she looked around. "Who carried me here?"

"Ah…that would be your sensei," Shinku replied as he watched the girl wobble on her feet and then move forward, towards him. "You shouldn't be walking, you know that?" he added softly.

"Dun'care," she muttered.

"New ways of killing the language, lesson five, by Naruko Uzumaki," he chuckled. "It's 'I don't care', Naruko."

"Yeah," she rolled her eyes as she gripped on the side of his bed and then hoisted herself up. The next instant, she was next to him, her head resting against his arm. "What'cha reading?"

She actually asked that with a childish tone, which made him sigh and flip open the book again.

"A book on Tax Deductions."

Naruko pouted and snuggled her face closer to his side. "That's boooring," she whined.

"Someone has to do them," he retorted. "What are you, five years old?"

"Yep!" she grinned toothily at that, a puff of smoke turning her into the Child-Naruko. "Onii-tan, read me a story pwetty pwease!" she blinked with her wide doe-eyes that sparkled blue, and he just closed the book on taxes —it was boring anyway.

How she managed to change her appearance and form so easily, was something he'd never understood.

Wasn't the Henge supposed to be an illusion?

"Very well," he sighed and closed his eyes for a moment to think about it.

"Once upon a time," he began, "There was…a princess."

"Did she kick ass?"

"Naruko! Language!" he chided her softly, as the girl groaned.

When she did not say anything else, he continued. "She was…pretty, I suppose."

"Uh? How can you suppose that? I'm sure she was pretty, Aniki," Naruko pouted. "Yeah, and she kicked a…butts everywhere."

"Am I telling the story, or are you telling it?"

"Fine," Naruko rolled her eyes, muttering under her breath. "She was still awesome anyway."

"She lived in a castle, atop the highest tower there was…and she had long, blond locks that she brushed daily."

He waited a beat for Naruko to interrupt. When she didn't, he continued. "She was trapped into the tower, because an evil witch held her imprisoned."

"But she kicked her butt and was free to leave," Naruko said then. "Then she found an awesome Aniki and went on a thousand of adventures battling dragons, wizards and evil monsters!"

"Yep," he remarked calmly.

"It was pretty short for a story, Aniki," he sweat dropped when she said that. "Tell me another?"

"You know I should be resting?" he hazarded with an awry smile, as he closed his eyes. He could feel Naruko move next to him, in her 'Moe' form.

"Sorry," she said earnestly. Then, he felt a soft something touch his chin and he carefully cracked open an eye. Had Moe-Naruto just given him a quick peck on the cheek?

She was completely red in the face however. "I…" she stammered out. "Family kisses on the cheek, right?"

He slowly brought his right hand on the back of Naruko's head, and then gently pushed her forward to his. Her eyes widened for a moment…

As he kissed her on the forehead.

"Ah…Ah! I…ehm…I think…I should go sleep! Yeah!" she then turned around on the bed, giving him her back, and gripped on his arm before mocking the most fake-sounding snores ever to be done.

He supposed she was just acting like a scared kid who nearly lost her father.

Shizune entered the room a few hours later, and then brought a hand to her mouth, startled. She held the exclamation in her throat as she watched one of the cutest scenes ever to be born beneath the sun of Konoha in front of her eyes.

There was a Moe-Naruko sleeping, drooling slightly over Shinku's chest. The boy too was asleep, a book held within the fingers of his right arm, which was surrounding Moe-Naruko's frame. Both were sleeping, with Shinku's face slightly down on Naruko's hair, as if he was just about to give her a kiss on the head.

Shizune's heart melted.

Maybe it was her age —she was still young, but putting up a family was actually starting to come sooner and sooner in her head— but…she just had to take a picture.

Naruko frowned. She had heard a sharp click.

She groaned and carefully pried open an eye. She felt fine now. She knew all that she needed would be just a nap and then she'd be able to go back home.

She felt warm though, warm and held close.

It felt…nice. She remembered those times she had slept alone through nightmares, or woke up alone in the empty apartment that was hers.

Then Aniki had come around, and she hadn't been alone any longer. He had _stayed_.

She gazed into his still sleeping form, before hearing the click again. She turned her face to the source…

And nearly face-vaulted.

Shizune, Baa-chan's apprentice, had a dribble of blood down her nose as she was taking pictures of her with a camera.

"Aw…" she cooed. "Little Naru-chan woke up? Is she a fussy baby? Uh? Uh? Do you need…"

"Shizune-neechan…" she grumbled rubbing her eyelids, make a small yawn.

"KAWAIiiiii…" Then, Shizune fell on the ground covered in blood.

Naruko puffed back into her normal form, and then turned around to fall asleep once more. Whatever it was, it could wait.

She wasn't going to let Aniki out of her sight again. If she had to cling to his arm in order to do so…well, she didn't mind.

One point that Shinku pretty much had come to terms with, within the last few hours, was that Naruko really had no sense of decency.

His gaze was upwards towards the ceiling after all…for a very simple reason.

He was in the hospital gown.

Naruko was in one too.

Said hospital gowns, of course…were tied on the back only by a thin strap.

Needless to say, Shinku knew, he just knew, someone was going to levy against him the charges of being a paedophile. Still, as he watched Naruko sleep…he exhaled softly.

He actually wondered why Shizune was on the floor bleeding heavily, but he decided to file it up as 'another random act of madness' that ninjas tended to do.

Naruko moaned slightly, turning around and gripping on his shoulder strongly, her face buried into his side.

"Naruko," he softly whispered. "Ehi, come on," he muttered.

"I'll…protect Aniki…'ttebayo…" she murmured in her sleep.

He just chuckled at that, shaking his head slowly as he let her be.

Well, no use fighting it…she'd have to wake up eventually…right?


	45. Safeguarding

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Five

"_**NEVER**_!" Naruko's scream attracted his attention, as he turned to stare at Naruko screaming at the top of her lungs against…Jiraiya.

"Come on brat! It's a once in a lifetime opportunity!" the Sannin yelled back. The fact was, they were both yelling from the nearby rooftop of the building directly in front of the academy's window. He supposed that Naruko would start having stalker tendencies…what with her being friends with a stalker to begin with.

Hinata made a polite sneeze as she resumed her work —that was NOT stalking. She was just 'Loving From Afar'…which was completely different from Stalking.

"I'm NOT GOING pervert-sage!" Naruko screamed again. "Now fu—"

He carefully opened the window.

"LANGUAGE!" he chided, only for Naruko to bit her tongue and wince, before sheepishly scratching her head.

He closed the window, and returned to his class.

"As I was saying, history tells us of…"

"You can't say no to this! I'm willing to take you on as an apprentice you brat!"

"I'M. NOT. GOING."

"WHY YOU!"

Shinku's forehead sported a nervous tick mark as he made a nervous smile while his lips twitched. It lasted only a moment, then his students watched their sensei extract from beneath the desk a frying pan and leave through the door.

They all heard a twin set of strong *THUNKS* soon followed by cries of shock.

"Go and yell elsewhere!" he exclaimed to the two ninja in front of him, now both sporting a big bump on their heads and looking downwards. "You're over fifty, Jiraiya-sama! No yelling! And Naruko, I'm teaching right now, no screaming!"

"B-But Aniki…" Naruko whined.

"We'll talk about this later, at home. Now go, the both of you!"

As Shinku exhaled and turned to re-enter his classroom, he could hear Naruko mutter venomously towards Jiraiya.

"You made Aniki mad you pervert!"

"Me? It's you who keeps saying no! It's a once in a life time opportunity!"

"NO!"

Shinku groaned. Thankfully, the rest of the day went by without a hitch.

It was as he left that he suddenly was surrounded by a mob of Naruko. They all wore sunglasses.

She also had tied a piece of string to the right side of all of her clones' ears, and they were mock talking in code words like 'the package is moving' or 'protect the package'.

"Naruko," he exhaled slowly, clenching his fist.

"Yes Aniki?" the closest turned her face to look at him. He grabbed her and proceeded to scrub her head hard with his knuckles, making her whine and flail before all the other clones popped away.

"ANIiikiiiii."

She gingerly touched her head as he simply ruffled it one last time. "Shouldn't you be doing missions?"

"Ah," Naruko sheepishly smiled. "I sent a clone! Kakashi-sensei has us do nothing more than stupid D-ranks now that we're only two…and Sakura's training with Baa-chan to become a Medic-Nin! She wants to become a nurse and…"

Somehow, from that moment Shinku truly believed he would never again receive a wound, or have to go to the hospital. He had the feeling that if he did…he would not be leaving on his own legs.

"What were you discussing with Jiraiya-sama back then?"

"The pervert wants me to go on a trip with him," Naruko scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "I don't wanna."

"I don't want to," he shook his head. "Why not? Didn't you go on one just recently too?"

"Yeah, but this one…he said it might take three years!" Naruko exclaimed, opening her arms wide. "Three years are a lot of time, Aniki! What if something happens to you!?"

He closed his eyes and sighed. Three years were a lot of time. "And what about the next Chuunin exams?"

Naruko grumbled and crossed her arms. "He said I can take them whenever we come back."

"But didn't you want to become a Chuunin?"

"Yeah…" she sighed.

"Still, he'd train you on the trip, right?"

"Uh-Uh, something like that I suppose," she made a frown and looked sideways.

"Naruko? Is something the problem…"

"It's just…he's a pervert, Aniki!" she yelled. "I mean…to get him to teach me…I had to do the Sexy no Jutsu! When we went for Baa-chan, he took my money from Gama-chan! When I had to learn how to use…that chakra, he threw me in a crevice! And those things were only days or weeks! I don't know what he'll do with years!"

He smiled.

He smiled pleasantly and then carefully patted Naruko's head. "Hey, how about you go home for a moment, and then I'll come by in a moment?"

"B-But I have to prote—"

"Naruko," he smiled gently. "You're still too young to hear certain things."

Somehow, Jiraiya began to shudder from his spot in hiding.

Shinku began to walk towards the Hokage tower, holding the most serene smile on his face that he could muster.

It was so serene people screamed or fainted as he passed by, and when his lips twitched, a few even began to run away.

Jiraiya began to sweat bullets as he followed with his sight the man enter the Hokage's tower.

What had the brat told him? And why was he…

Five minutes later, and a terrifying scream of "JIRAIYAAAAAAAAAAA!" came from the Hokage's tower…and from Tsunade's voice.

"They're calling for you," a fellow dressed in black said next to him. "You shouldn't be late for your appointment."

"Listen Joe…can't I go another day?" Jiraiya pouted.

"Now, now," Joe Black remarked. "Off you go."

Head hung low…Jiraiya went.

The Shinigami just watched him leave, and then returned to his _Icha-Icha Necrophilia Unleashed_.

Jiraiya entered the office of the Godaime expecting to be on the receiving end of a frosty glare from Tsunade. He didn't really expect her to actually fling a fist at him and send him flying outside of the window. He dusted off the dirt from the spot he landed, and then re-entered the tower once more.

Only to receive a frying pan on the face.

Finally, as the birds settled down from circling around his head, Tsunade grabbed him by the neck of the shirt.

"What's this I hear about you harassing Naruko!? You damn pervert! She's your god-daughter! And stealing her money!?"

"It was a loan, Tsunade-chan!" he said in his defence. "She was going around with way too much money!"

"And you threw her down a cliff!"

"There was the need of a do or die situation to get the Kyuubi out!"

"And she had to transform into an adult version for you to teach her!"

"I was just yanking her chain, really!"

There was a moment of silence as the Godaime growled at him, before turning to look at Shinku. "Unfortunately, this idiot is _still_ needed by Konoha's forces…" Tsunade exhaled. "And Naruko needs to leave with him."

He clenched his fists for a moment, before distending them.

"It's…It has something to do with Orochimaru?"

"No, worse," Jiraiya grimaced, returning serious. "Akatsuki…it's an organization of mercenary that wants to capture the Bijuu to extract them…and that, that kills the host, kid."

"Naruko has to be on the move, so that they can't try and capture her before. The attack done recently, by the two S-rank ninjas? They were working for that organization," Tsunade added. "And Jiraiya has a spy network to maintain…even between his debaucheries. He'll made a trip around the elemental countries with the brat…keep the heat off their tails."

"Why not tell her that?" Shinku said. "And why do you have to act like a pervert in front of her like that? She's a girl, you know?"

"Life's too serious to take it seriously," Jiraiya remarked. "And she's just a kid. Can't tell her that now, can I?"

"But when she needs to be a soldier you just tell her that and she obeys, isn't that right?" he snarled back. "You can't have both. Either she's a kid or she isn't. And it's her life we're talking about! Damn it! If it's for her safety that she leaves…I understand, but I want reassurances! I'm not letting her in the hands of a 'perverted-sage who spends more time in inns with whores than training me!' are we clear on that!?"

"Hey! I'm talking with my contacts when I'm with whores!"

"THEN TELL HER THAT FOR KAMI'S SAKE!" Shinku yelled back at him. "I don't know why you think she's stupid or something, but she isn't!"

"Now, I never said she was…"

"No? Then what does this sound like? I'm not telling her because 'nope'? It doesn't work that way with me, at all! You want to take her on a three years trip? I want to be sure she's going to be fine no matter what!" he was breathing raggedly by that point, but he still ploughed on. "She wants to take the Chuunin exams with her team and her sensei, what are you going to do about that?"

"That's…That's impossible. I mean, we'll be keeping out of shinobi villages to avoid her being recognized and…"

"Will she be able to write home?"

"No! Letters might be tracked and…"

"And there you have it," Shinku exhaled. "She will fight you every step of the way. Every. Single. Step. Unless you tell her, and even then, she'll have to be convinced."

"The brat's anything short of a mule when it comes to being a hardhead," Tsunade remarked then. "Frankly, the only way she'll be amenable is if you tell her that, boy."

He ground his teeth. "I have a condition then."

"Oh? Let's hear it," Tsunade commented.

"You tell her the names of her parents and who they were."

"W-What!? No way!" Jiraiya crossed his arms. "That's an S-rank secret right there! You can't know that and the brat can't know that!"

"And why should I tell her?" Tsunade asked instead. "There are…reasons, they were kept away from her."

"I know that," he deadpanned. "But if she has to spend three years in the company of a pervert, at least the pervert can come up with tales of her parents' time in Konoha," he narrowed his eyes on Jiraiya. "You are hailed as the teacher of the Yondaime after all, aren't you?"

"Damn it," Jiraiya hung his head. "Is this your idea of revenge?"

"I call it poetic retribution," Shinku snarled back. "You said it yourself: she'll have three years of literally no contact with anyone. She'll have her peers pass her by and become Chuunin before her, she'll basically be devoid of any and all chances of getting on with her life because she needs protection…the least you can do is give her anything she can count forward to every day."

Shinku crossed his arms over his chest, as he heard the long drawled sigh coming from the Godaime.

"All right," Tsunade acquiesced. "But you'll be the one telling her that. And you must stress the importance of keeping it a secret."

He grimaced, but nodded.

"I just have one last thing to say, Hokage-sama…" he said then, as he turned to stare at Jiraiya. "When she returns, pray to whatever Kami you believe in she has nothing but praise for your conduct…or I _will_ find you, I _will_ find out _where_ you live and _I will personally castrate you with a butter knife and a spoon._"

Jiraiya swallowed.

"Have I made myself clear?"

"Yes, yes, extremely clear!" Jiraiya spoke in a high-pitched voice.

The boy's face was like that of Woody…

Yamato sneezed.

…when he was pissed off. It was majestic to watch.

"Good!"

And with a final huff, Shinku walked out of the room.

"So," Tsunade said then, a venomous smile on her face. "You brought Naruko to a whorehouse?"

"Ah…" Jiraiya began to sweat heavily.

Elsewhere, Joe Black flipped a page. "Not yet," he muttered, shaking his head as the soul returned to its body.

And in the middle of it all…

Shinku scratched the back of his head.

How the hell was he going to tell Naruko about her parents?

**Author's notes**

**First off, a whole-hearted thank you once more to **_**Zelga Lim Li**_** who drew Shinku!**

**Yep, that's my first fanart *ever* received. Now next on the list is world domination. (Joking). To see the pic, you'll better click on the link of her account name, and then go to her deviant-art through that. (Really, straight-linking doesn't work at all)**

**That said…this is a slight diversion from canon. **

**On the 'Anime' tropes…we could say this is the Protective Older Brother Mode. **


	46. Revealing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Six

"Aniki?" Naruko asked softly. "There's…there's thirteen packages of Pork Ramen on the table." She was drooling as she said that. He just exhaled and nodded to her as she stepped inside. She was a blur of blond and orange as she closed the door behind her with a strong 'slam' noise, before already taking out the chopsticks and delving down on the first ramen cup.

He waited for her to get to the fourth take-away cup of Ramen, before grimacing and exhaling once more.

"Naruko…we have to talk."

Naruko hummed as she kept on eating.

"I…" he swallowed nervously. "I know…" how hard was it? He just had to man up and…

"Ah! You know!?" Naruko turned a bright shade of pink as she stopped eating all of a sudden. "It's not what you think it is, Aniki!"

He frowned. "Naruko…"

"I mean, it's not a scarf! It's a muffler, yeah! And…_you-don't-know-what-I'm-talking-about-are-you_…" she whispered turning an even darker shade of red.

"No, but that's not important," he remarked. He'd deal with whatever monstrosity of wool the girl had come up with later. "I found out who your parents were."

There, he had said that.

Naruko shrugged and went back to eating. "Oh, that? I don't care, Aniki."

"You don't?"

"No," she shook her head. "I mean…it's not like they can come back to life, right?"

"Yeah…I suppose…but still, you would like to hear stories about what they did in youth, right?"

"Why?" Naruko looked at him with shiny eyes. "They'd still be dead, wouldn't they? It would just…hurt. My family is here, I don't need stories or what ifs."

He closed his eyes. "You have to go with Jiraiya on that three years long trip, Naruko."

He heard the chopsticks drop and the chair slide backwards noisily.

"_WHAT_!? **ANIKI**! _**NO**_! _**WHY**_!?"

He opened his eyes to the shocked and betrayed face of Naruko looking at him.

"Jiraiya-sama…the Hokage…" his throat felt parched as he spoke, "They said it's for your own good."

"Why?" she softly whispered.

"Because…there is an organization, the Akatsuki…they're hunting for Jinchuuriki," he said. "You need to go with Jiraiya so that you can be safe from them."

"I'm sure I'd kick their asses anyway without the perverted sage! I don't have to leave for that, right!?"

"Naruko," softly, he stood up from his seat. "I'm…I'm sorry but…they're all S-rank…"

"I can fight them all off, Aniki! Dattebayo!" there were tears pooling at the corner of her eyes. "Please…believe me."

"I'm sorry," he made a step closer to her, "But…"

"No," she shook her head. "I don't want to leave for three years. I don't want to…I want to make more friends, I want to become a Chuunin with Sakura and Hinata…I want you to be there when I get my flak jacket and when I…when I'll be gone who'll be there to keep an eye on you, Aniki? You don't even eat your ramen without me around!"

"Naruko," he brought his right hand on the girl's shoulder, as he kneeled to be at the same height level as her. "I have faith that, if you leave with Jiraiya-sama, you will come back stronger than ever…and then I'm sure no one will ever think of sending you on another three year trip."

"But why me?" Naruko trembled. "Why _ME_!?"

"Because, Naruko…the Yondaime couldn't choose another," he brought his left hand on the girl's other shoulder. "What…What I was trying to tell you, Naruko…is that Kushina Uzumaki is your mother's name but…the Yondaime…Minato Namikaze… he is your father."

Her eyes widened in disbelief and then, just like that, he felt himself pushed away from her as the girl disappeared —the door clashing open and then slamming close a moment later.

He hissed in pain as he fell with his back against the wooden floor, but when he stood back up Naruko had already left. He ran out of the apartment in the next instant.

"NARUKO!"

Of course, no reply came.

He ground his teeth in frustration, before looking around. It was late, the sun had already set and the girl was nowhere around him. Being a Kunoichi…he had no doubt looking for her so late at night would be impossible.

The logical thing…would be to ask an Anbu.

Problem was, he wasn't thinking logically at all in that instant.

The first place he looked for was the top of the Hokage's monument.

That late at night, it felt somewhat creepy to walk in the middle of the cold breeze looking for the girl. He didn't find her atop the head of the Yondaime. He frowned. Where else could she have gone?

He returned down with a ragged breathing, before heading over to the Park —it was the second spot in his mind, after all.

She wasn't there.

He tried Ichiraku.

She wasn't there.

He was short on breath, extremely short on it, by the time he decided to try the Training ground she usually trained with her team.

He found her there, slamming punch after punch against the wooden trunks, to the point where her knuckles were bleeding harshly.

She wasn't slowing down at all however.

If anything, she was growling and screaming incoherently with every punch flung.

He swept away the sweat from his forehead as he walked closer. "Naruko…"

She stopped. "Why?" she croaked out. "It's not fair." She muttered, shaking her head. "It's not fair…It's not fair, not fair, not fair!" with every 'not fair' another fist hit the wood.

"Naruko," he called her name once more as he neared her. "There's a lot of stuff that…isn't fair, in the world." He slowly brought his right hand on her shoulder, only for her to spin around and slam her fist against his stomach.

He felt pain.

He fell down on his knees wheezing as he gagged for air, with tears in his eyes.

"T…that hurt…"

He heard Naruko gasping and kneeling down next to him, her hands bloodied. "I…I'm sorry! Aniki! I didn't mean to! I…"

"Gah…it's…all right," he ground out. "Should have known…no touching a moody ninja…they teach that at school, you know?" he tried to smile, but all that got out was probably a grimace.

"Aniki…" Naruko held his shoulder with her hands, gripping on to his jacket tightly. "I'm sorry."

"I'm the one who should be apologizing," he exhaled and then ended up down on the ground, looking upwards towards the sky. He was just too tired to care about moving.

Naruko shook her head strongly, before falling down right next to him.

"No…I mean…if you think about it, I'm the daughter of the Yondaime…how cool is that?"

"Your voice tells another story, Naruko," his lips twitched into an awkward smile. "Three years pass by quickly, trust me…if I think about it, it just seems like yesterday when I had to patch up a muddied brat who was trying her hardest not to cry."

"I was not crying!" Naruko pouted, "I was just…I had dirt in my eyes, 'ttebayo."

"Of course, of course," he chuckled.

A comfortable silence stretched between the two, as the moon was high in the sky and the stars twinkled.

"Ehi, Aniki?"

"Uhm?"

"I never thanked you, did I?" Naruko said softly.

"For what?"

"Believing in me," Naruko murmured.

"You mean the eldritch horror that is your muffler isn't a gift for me?"

"Aniiikiiiii," Naruko whined. "I'm trying to be serious here!"

"You mean the one thing you fail miserably at?"

There was another high-pitched whine and a huff from Naruko, while Shinku simply chuckled good-naturedly.

"Aniki…" she rolled over to look at him from the side. "Just you wait…I'll be back before you can think of it! And I'll be the strongest there ever is! Baa-chan will just have to give me the Chuunin vest when I'm back, 'ttebayo!"

"I'm sure she will," he remarked.

"The Yondaime's my father," Naruko muttered then, returning to watch the stars. "Awesome."

Ten minutes later, and Naruko turned to gaze at her Aniki once more —it was starting to get cold after all.

She blinked. He was asleep, snoring peacefully.

Well…

She was a ninja, she could sleep beneath the stars without a problem.

She just snuggled closer and then, holding on to a piece of Shinku's jacket, closed her eyes with her body pressed against his. She wasn't going to see him for three years though…was she really going to leave it at that?

She slowly opened her eyes again.

What if, in three years, he forgot about her?

Or what if…something bad happened?

No, that wouldn't do at all.

There really wasn't a choice then.

She'd have to ask some favours to some people.

Shinku slept.

He slept and he shuddered as he dreamed of playing chess with Death.

…

It didn't bode well at all.


	47. Homecoming

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Seven

Maito Gai.

Rock Lee.

Hinata Hyuga dressed in orange and with her hair bleached blond.

Shinku felt a giant —no, scratch that— an enormous —not big enough— a _titanic_ headache incoming, like every single day since Naruko had left. He carefully grabbed his frying pan.

"You will not take me alive today. I swear this upon my holy blade," he narrowed his eyes. There was silence as a ball of hay rustled through his kitchen, somehow made a sharp whistle noise and soon…

Soon he was disarmed and forced to go on a long mile-long trek around the village.

"YOSH! LET THE FIRES OF YOUTH BURN BRIGHTLY TODAY TOO!"

"GAI-SENSEI! YOSH! IF I CANNOT COMPLETE THE LAPS WITHIN THE END OF THE DAY, I WILL DO FIFTY PUSH-UPS!"

"YOSH! LEE-KUN! IF I CANNOT DO THE LAP TWENTY TIMES BY THE TIME SHINKU-KUN IS DONE, I WILL RUN FIFTY TIMES AROUND KONOHA ON MY HANDS!"

"Why is no one yelling at them to shut up?" Shinku muttered under his breath.

Hinata coughed politely, running next to him wearing the same clothes as Naruko.

"Shinku-Aniki," her breasts went 'boing' up and 'boing' down, "In three years, the residents of their normal lap rounds have begun wearing earplugs."

He grumbled his understanding and diverted his gaze. In three years, Hinata had grown up quite nicely.

In three years, he hadn't gone to the hospital once, nor near any other medical facility because Sakura had begun asking for _sperm samples_.

In three years, he had been 'bagged' and 'kidnapped' at least a few dozen of time to take tea with Ibiki, and have friendly chats.

In three years, he had gone to drink with the Hokage too many times to count, and found himself the morning after in the same bed as her apprentice nearly on the same account. Thankfully, all the times both of them were dressed.

Albeit he had to wonder what was up with the woman having a nursery already set up, and a marriage contract in her pocket with only the name of the husband to fill in.

In three years, many things had changed.

Yet many more remained the same.

"Onii-samaa!" a pink haired girl —who was his nightmare half of the time— waved at him from alongside his lap. "Do you need a check-up!? Something to drink?" why she was wearing a nurse outfit was beside him, but he simply shook his head. The Something to Drink was, _nine times out of two_ laced with something.

Sakura huffed as she watched her Onii-sama leave. "One day, he'll be mine Shannaro!" she said fist pumping and dropping the glass of water in the nearby bushes.

The bushes fell flat on the ground, quivering as they began to snore.

"Aniki of One-san! Fight me!" a brown haired brat —whom he had no idea whatsoever who he was— emerged from an alleyway. Shinku just smiled and coughed out next to Lee.

"Look Rock Lee! A burning fire of youth ready to be kindled!"

"YOOOSSSHHHHHHHH!" and then Rock Lee was gone running behind a screaming Konohamaru…Shinku smiled. One of his targets was done. Now he needed to remove the second one.

He was a Jounin, so he'd need something a bit more complicated.

"Maito-San, look! Spandex on sale over there!"

"WHAT!? WHERE! YOSH! LET THE FIRE OF YOUTH BURN BRIGHTLY AS I BUY—"

Shinku disappeared into an alleyway the next instant, and then gasped for air as he began to walk with a limp all the way to the Park.

He swiped away the sweat from his forehead, grabbing the small bottle of water he held inside his jacket. He was sure he'd never forget about Naruko after this.

Oh, she was in for some hard head ruffling whenever she came back. A small smile graced his lips as he sat down at his usual bench, taking out a book and beginning to read from it.

Hinata settled next to him and took out a book from her own jacket.

_Icha-Icha Friends Always Share._

Shinku just hoped Hiashi never learned the girl had begun reading porn.

Well…'erotic novels' actually.

Not that he read those, nor that he had started buying porn novels again since he had a new house now devoid of Naruko rummaging around for porn.

There was one thing he wondered about.

Anko had been gone for three years.

He wondered if Ibiki's punishment was a bit harsh…but then again, he supposed whatever it was couldn't be lethal.

Maybe she had been sent on a long-term mission?

Anko sneezed, and then returned to her job: using a toothbrush —Ibiki's— to wash the entire T&I department. She could not leave until she was done.

It had already been three years…

_And she was not done yet, but when she was, she had certain urges to take care of_.

Shinku shuddered.

"Are you feeling cold, Shinku-Aniki?" Hinata asked demurely. "Would you like to warm up between my bountiful cleavage?"

She said that straight-faced.

He blinked and then calmly shook his head.

"Fine," Hinata huffed. "It is more difficult than I thought, acting like Naruko."

"I doubt she'd say something like that in a thousand years," Shinku nervously chuckled.

"Still, I have improved, have I not Aniki-san?" Hinata fluttered her eyelids, pressing her arms together to show her chest. He was flipping a page, so he missed the gesture.

"I suppose you have."

In the quiet silence that followed, Shinku kept on humming and reading happily. His vacation day looked to be returning on its rightful tracks —sometimes he didn't manage to stave off both of the Green monsters at the same time— and everything looked to be fine.

Hinata gasped slightly, but he ignored it. He supposed she had just read some extremely shocking part of her own Icha-Icha book. He was reading 'Gardening for Advanced Users'. He had three years of plant watering to his back, after all.

Two hands covered his eyes the next moment, as a female voice said in a mock-high pitched voice.

"Guess who!"

He frowned slightly.

"Sakura?"

"Nope."

"Hinata?"

"She's next to you. Are you even trying, Aniki?"

"Anko?" a smile graced his lips.

"I'm not a saggy breasted whore!"

"Then you're clearly Jiraiya, right?"

"Ufff…come on, Aniki!" the voice whined in her natural tone.

"Ah, I really don't know you I'm afraid," he replied slowly standing up as Naruko moved her hands away from his eyes. She held her arms behind her back, her body slightly inclined as her head was up in a bright white smile. She had grown taller since the last time they had seen each other, but her ponytails, her whisker-like markings on her cheeks and her eyes remained the same.

"You did force me to spend some gruesome mornings with the Konoha Green Duo," he began carefully cracking his knuckles. "Who proceeded to waste away my Saturday afternoons and Sunday mornings with exercises upon exercises," Naruko's smile faltered a bit as she paled.

"Then, you all but ordered to Hinata to act like you, and to get her knowledge from the Icha-Icha books," he sported a feral smile then. "Do you know how close I came to being killed by her father?" he cocked his head to the side.

Naruko recoiled bringing her arms up in the air in front of her head. "Aniki! No! Please! It was for—"

Then he hugged her tightly, holding her gently into his arms as he patted her on the head. Naruko made a startled 'Nyah!' sound, before starting to purr like a cat.

"Aniiikiiii…" Naruko whined, but hugged him back.

"No ramen for three years," Shinku stated then with the calmest of expressions, making Naruko's face turn completely ashen white. "Unless you convince the green duo to stop harassing me in my free days."

Naruko exhaled in relief and nodded.

"All right!" she fist pumped in the air. "Naruko Uzumaki is back in town!" she screamed then. "Do you hear me, Konoha!? I'M BACK!"

He patted her on the head, chuckling while she shuddered and blushed slightly at his touch. "Aniikiii…I'm trying to make a point here!"

"Yeah, yeah…Welcome back, Naruko."

And Naruko smiled.

It was good to be back home.

**Author's notes**

**Time Skip Done.**

***shrugs* Fluff for everyone.**


	48. Spotting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Eight

"And so he taught me how to do this big ass swamp, Aniki!" Naruko exclaimed bringing her arms up wide. "And then he told me 'since your element is wind and I know shit about it, good luck on that kiddo!'"

"Language," he chided her.

It looked such a normal and common thing. Yet Naruko was now sixteen, and rather than barely arriving at half of his height —she had truly been a shrimp— she now was at his chin, if not a bit higher yet.

"And then we went to Iwa and guess what, I made a friend! At first she was a bit stuck up, but then I used the One-thousand days of pain on her, and we struck up a friendship afterwards."

Wasn't that the banned technique? Surely, it couldn't be that simple…

"And there was a ghost castle in the middle of nowhere, and we slept in there but there was this ghost and…"

Yeah, right.

"And then there was this big bad-ass flying city that…"

Naruko, really?

"And then we talked with a strange guy using a pipe and there was this girl who could blow things up with a tattoo on her back and…"

What else, lasers?

"And this tower that shot forth laser beams and…"

"Naruko, enough," he sighed making a small smile. "I get it, you had a very interesting trip. Something more down to earth however?"

She scrunched up her face for a moment, mulling it over. "Ah, you know they made a bridge in my name in the Land of Waves? They called it 'The Great Naruko Bridge!' and it's really big, Aniki!"

"Good to know," he began to quietly eat his own Tsukemen.

"Ehi, Ayame-nechan!" Naruko exclaimed then. "Where's my Ramen!?"

"It's a Tsukemen stall now, Naruko-chan," Ayame replied with a bright smile. "It's healthier."

Naruko growled slightly, but then grabbed both the noodles and the soup and plunged them together in the same bowl.

"Tsukemen my as—"

"Naruko," Shinku commented carefully. "Language."

"Sorry Aniki," Naruko winced. "Just, the perverted sage was crude most of the time when he went into the whorehouses," Shinku smiled as the chopsticks snapped in his hands. "You know they have really soft beds there, Aniki? And there's like, these strange long and hard thingies that vibrate and…"

Shinku's forehead sported a bulging vein of anger.

Jiraiya was glad he had decided not to follow Naruko around, especially because Joe was waving at him from afar.

"Aw, that old pervert!" Ayame exclaimed. "Naruko-chan, tell me," here Ayame's smile turned coy. "Did you find anyone who made your heart flutter during your trip? Any love?"

Naruko blinked. "Uh?"

"Come on…a boyfriend, that is…found any?" Ayame winked at the girl, who seemed to put finally two plus two together. Naruko gasped bringing a hand to her mouth and turning crimson, before shaking her head while holding on to the tip of her ponytails —fidgeting with them as she held an incredibly demurred attitude.

"Aw…no one? Poor Naruko-chan," Ayame smiled brightly. "You have your eyes set on someone in Konoha then?"

Naruko's entire frame shuddered for a moment, before she vehemently whined while shaking her head; both her hands covered her face.

She did give a careful peek to where Shinku was —who, at the clear-cut understanding that it was 'girl-talk' had most aptly decided to ignore everything and read the menu on the other side of the counter.

"You might have competition," Ayame giggled.

Naruko sputtered.

"No! That's not what I meant!"

"Oh? Better!" Ayame smiled, "One less rival! Good, good!"

After dinner, Naruko frowned as she followed Aniki up to the point where…where he took to going in a completely different direction.

"Aniki?" Naruko said, stopping him from going further. "Home is that way…"

"Ah, nope," Shinku smiled. "It's this way now, Naruko," he gestured for her to follow. "Come on, this way."

Naruko frowned, but followed. It was a relatively quiet walk, with Naruko looking around perplexedly as she took in the new roads and the new houses all around.

"This is affectionately called the 'Woody' quarter," Shinku said calmly. "The houses were all built here after Orochimaru's siege. They're all made of wood and then reinforced at a later date with concrete. It cut on the costs quite a bit and more than a few opted to transfer —even those whose houses had been left untouched."

Shinku stopped in front of a rectangular looking house on two floors. "The fun thing is, Naruko, when I became your guardian I also looked into what possessions your parents might have had. While I did find relatively little, they had a house. The house was destroyed," he swiftly added, "But the terrain was still there. So I sold it back to Konoha, added in my own loan and three years later…" he gestured towards the house as he unhooked a set of keys.

"Here you go," he threw the keys at Naruko, who caught them dumbfounded. "Home. Three years' worth of birthday gifts I hope." He smiled and winked at her.

"A-Aniki?" she croaked as she stepped inside, behind him. "It's…"

"If you start crying, I'll have to ruffle your hair."

Naruko just smiled then, wiping away the sweat from her face —clearly, she wasn't crying— and then smiled.

"Where's my room, Aniki!? No! Never mind! I'm off to exploring!"

Shinku smiled and watched her go, as he headed towards the kitchen.

There was a slightly nagging feeling of having forgotten something however…

"ANIKI! WHAT DOES THE WORD C—"

Oh.

Right.

He had hidden his porn stash in his room.

Which meant that Naruko had found it within the next three minutes.

He exhaled.

He could do this. It wasn't as if she was still a thirteen years old. Teuchi had given her the talk, right?

He'd just make his own cup of tea while…

No, he couldn't. His Aniki-instincts screamed at him to run and open the door of his room, and then yell.

"Naruko! Halt!"

He barged in the room just in time to see the girl turn a crimson shade and start to emit vapour from her ears as she flipped through another page.

"A…Aniki?" she croaked out.

He blinked and looked at the title.

"_Young Sister Forbidden Love, Ultra-Hardcore Edition!"_

That…

That wasn't _his_.

He growled.

"_**SAKURAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!**_"

Somewhere in the hospital of Konoha, Sakura grinned and chuckled as a light dribble of blood fell down her nose.

"Onii-sama must have found my suggestions," she giggled. "Oh…I hope he spanks me."

Somehow, the woman examined scuttled a bit further away from the nurse. The pink-haired nurse was really scary…and that lecherous grin…

It didn't bode well.

It didn't bode well at all.


	49. Striking

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Forty-Nine

Naruko opened her eyes to an unfamiliar wooden ceiling. She groaned as her nose twitched, before she stumbled down from her bed and crashed face first on the floor.

She grumbled and yawned, scratching her side as she looked around for a moment. Right. This was her house now. She lived in it together with Aniki. Her nose twitched again.

There was a good smell coming from outside her room. She trudged down in her frog pyjama, emitting small yawns as she rubbed her eyes. She opened the door where the good smell was coming from, and she blinked once.

There were pancakes on the table. There were eggs. There was a pot of coffee —something Jiraiya had prohibited her from drinking after that one time with her overexcitedly tearing down half a mountain after taking five sips of it— and a jug of milk.

Mostly however, there was a dishevelled and tired looking creature known to her mind as '_**Her**_ Aniki' stumbling through the motions of preparing breakfast and a Bento.

He looked like a housewife...

She couldn't help but remember one of Jiraiya's bits of work she had to type-edit, which had a naked apron scene.

She coughed and looked elsewhere, swallowing her spit in the meantime and nearly choking on it.

Aniki was Aniki.

And he'd never look at her as anything else than his Imouto…she knew that.

Didn't mean it didn't hurt.

"Oh?" Shinku said, turning his gaze towards her. "Good morning! Slept well?"

"Yep!" Naruko exclaimed with a forced smile. Maybe she hadn't slept well, but then again she was a ninja…sleeping comfortably was probably so strange she hadn't closed her eyes once —at least, that was Shinku's thought.

Silence settled in the kitchen, as Shinku hummed pleasantly to himself while cooking.

"Neh, Aniki?" Naruko asked suddenly, carefully having crept to his side. "Can I help?"

"Sure," he shrugged, "Chop the lettuce."

Naruko whined. "I hate lettuce!"

"It's good for you," he retorted. "Vegetables are your friends," he added with a knowing nod.

"They're sucky friends," Naruko muttered.

"Oh come on, what did you eat while on the trip, cup ramen?"

Naruko didn't answer.

"Naruko?"

Naruko began to sweat and whistle.

"Naruko…"

"Ramen has vegetables!" she blurted out.

"NARUKO!" Shinku exclaimed with a huff, "it's vegetables for you, young miss! Hundreds of kilos of them! We'll start with—"

"Aniki, since when have you become this fussy?" Naruko squirmed as she looked at him perplexed.

"A single man leaving alone and having to fend off with a spoon and a frying pan a few woman like myself naturally learns some tricks…" and then his eyes darkened, "And being regularly brought to train with the Green Spandex Duo…do you think I didn't learn anything? I'd let you taste one of their vitamin-filled horrendous milkshakes…just to give you a taste of the hell I went through in these three years…"

He gasped for air. "If I think…no, it's too traumatizing to even recall…they even forced a spandex suit on me once!"

"No!" Naruko exclaimed in shock and grief. "On my Aniki!? How could they! Those monsters!"

"Indeed," Shinku nodded gravely. "I felt so violated…" he sniffled, before grabbing the wooden spoon and smacking the back of Naruko's hand —who was aiming for a piece of omelette.

"There are pancakes on the table, no eating lunch for breakfast."

Naruko groaned. "But Anikiiii…"

"What are you, five years old?" Shinku rolled his eyes.

"Uff…spoil me?" Naruko blinked fluttering her eyelids as she moved closer.

"Nope," he grumbled back, giving her a flick on the forehead. "Sit down if you don't want to cooperate in the cooking."

"Stingy," she smiled then and turned her face sideways with a mischievous grin.

Shinku returned to his omelette, which now was missing five pieces.

"Naruko," he groaned. "Come on!"

"What?" she said with the 'fakest' innocent voice ever to be mastered.

"Naruko…"

Breakfast was, overall, a happy affair. There was grumbling, chuckling, giggling and whatnot. Heads were bonked with wooden spoons just as much as hands, and pancakes flew around or were devoured at the same time.

In the end, Naruko actually didn't want to go meet her team.

"Come on now," Shinku said pushing her gently out of the door, having already handed over her bento. "It's not like I won't be here when you come back."

Naruko pouted. She puffed her cheeks and then began to walk out, only to quickly spin around and kiss him on the cheek before cheekily grinning.

"See ya later Aniki!" then, she jumped off to the nearby rooftop and from there began to dash towards the training grounds.

"Yeah, later you little rascal," he rolled his eyes as he watched her go, before returning to the house. He stretched and then nodded to himself.

He had a welcome home party to prepare for after all.

Anko looked at the last corner of the last room of the last level of the T&I department.

Ibiki closed his eyes as he heard the scrubbing come to a halt.

He swore he could hear the breathing of everyone else in the department still at the same time. It was done.

Anko had served her punishment.

"Now, Anko…" Ibiki began. "I know you might feel…frustrated."

"Three years without, make Anko's reason blackout," Anko smiled brightly as she said that chirpily, before walking out of the department whistling a tune.

Ibiki swallowed nervously.

"What have I done," he murmured as he brought a hand to his face. A fellow Anbu nearby gently patted the scarred man on the shoulder.

"Sir, you couldn't know."

"I have condemned us all…" Ibiki muttered.

"Well, nobody can die from too much of 'that', right?" another Anbu said then.

"You don't know Anko, son," an older Anbu replied. "Oh…you don't know her at all…"

"Betting pool's open!" a younger Anbu screamed then with a scroll in hand. "Make your bet! Who'll be satisfied first!? Who'll die first!? Come on! Five ryo is the starting betting pool!"

Shinku shuddered as he felt a cold breeze on his neck. He could swear he had closed the window five minutes before.

Sakura touched her teacup –that she had actually stolen from her Onii-sama's own cupboard after he had drank from it— and watched it crack.

The next moment she was already booking out and running towards her beloved Onii-sama's house.

He was in danger, clearly!

She hoped to arrive in the aftermath of course. Sperm samples were easier to take when the guy in question didn't fight back.

Then again, Aniki wasn't fighting back…

He was just shy.

Really shy.

There was a knock at the door as Shinku went to open it.

The person on the other side…

_Struck._

**Author's notes**

…

**Rot your teeth with this fluff!**


	50. Catfighting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty

Shinku opened his eyes after the surprise attack to find himself in the Hokage's office, staring at Kakashi. The man's silver hair was unmistakeable, as well as the lop-sided eye smile he was sporting.

"As Naruko has returned to the village," Tsunade remarked. "You will need an escort once more."

"Kakashi?" he looked towards the silver haired man. "Isn't he supposed to be Naruko's sensei?"

"No," Tsunade sighed. "He will be Naruko's sensei after all, as you aptly put it. You'll need someone else which I can trust."

"So?"

The purple haired kunoichi known as Yugao Uzuki coughed slightly, appearing from the shadows.

"It will be a pleasure to follow you once more, Haruno-san."

Shinku brought a hand to his face. "Really?"

"Akatsuki has begun to move," Tsunade said with a grimace. "We can't risk them kidnapping you to bring Naruko running out of Konoha."

He exhaled slowly, and then nodded.

"Oh, right, I should be doing the bell test," Kakashi remarked opening his Icha-Icha Tactics. "But that's boring. So how about I do the Aniki test like last time?"

Shinku blearily closed his eyes and looked sideways. "You mean, hanging me from a tree with nothing but water beneath me?"

"Yep," Kakashi smiled. "But that would be boring, so I thought something more…exciting."

Suddenly, the shinigami became all too real next to him.

Naruko was bored, as time seemed to trickle by. To wait there for Kakashi, she could have gone elsewhere. Even Sakura was fidgeting. "I have a bad feeling Naruko," Sakura muttered repeatedly. "Someone is attempting at my Onii-sama's purity…and I'm not there to acquire baby samples."

Naruko scuttled a bit away from the maniacal muttering Sakura.

"Yoh!" Kakashi said with a bright smile, waving at the two girls.

"You're late!" Naruko screeched.

"Ah, I was preparing the test!" the silver haired Jounin smiled warmly. "Ibiki let Anko go. She's been three years without having done 'that'…and I just so casually mentioned to her that Shinku was tied to the Hokage's monument, dangling from the Yondaime's head."

The smile behind the mask of Kakashi became something feral to behold.

"Good luck protecting him from Anko until tonight! And no cutting the bindings, or I'll disqualify you!"

And with that, Kakashi disappeared in a flicker.

The next moment, both Sakura and Naruko left behind trails of fire, so fast they began to dash across Konoha.

"ANIIIIKIIIIIII…"

"ONIIISAAAMMMAAAAAAA…"

Shinku blearily opened his eyes to the sight of Konoha beneath him. He was dangling, tied to a rope that in turn attached to a protuberance of rock that belonged to the Yondaime's head.

He sighed, a sweat drop appearing on his forehead.

He wasn't going to die from this —he supposed his body guard would come around in the end before he splattered to the ground.

Suddenly, he realized the scenery was changing as he was rising. Someone was pulling him upwards, and if the half-crazed laughter was of any indication…

He saw Anko drooling, her face something truly frightening to behold.

"Hey Shinku! I'm told you're still on the market!" she said with a bright smile.

"Why are you holding a condom in your right hand, Anko?" he deadpanned as he was slowly brought up.

"Well, that's not important! How about we both go and get to know each other better at my house? Or we can go at yours! Yours will certainly be cleaner and closer, yep…"

Then there was an explosion of smoke as he felt himself hauled away by a pair of arms. Air rushed out of his lungs as his stomach twisted. They were falling. They were falling and he was going to die!

"Don't worry Aniki, I've got you!" Naruko exclaimed loudly, strengthening her hold on him as she made a hand sign. Legions of Naruko shot in the air just as dozens of needles pierced them in plumes of smoke. He felt his stomach go way past his throat as he was thrown in mid-air from Naruko to Naruko.

"Untie meee…"

"I can't Aniki!" Naruko said apologetically, as she landed on a nearby roof. "It's Kakashi's test!"

"What? No! What the he—" he was pushed back just as a kunai landed where he would have been a moment before.

"Bad brat!" Anko yelled. "Bad, bad brat!" the purple haired Jounin landed neatly in front of the girl. "You don't take away Anko's prize…understood?"

"Aniki's isn't your prize, you saggy breasted hag! Go back to where you came from, 'ttebayo!" Naruko yelled back.

"Do I have a say in this?" Shinku weakly asked, only to suddenly feel a hand grab at his mouth, silencing him. His eyes widened at the sight of Sakura smiling creepily towards him, blood dribbling down her nose.

"Mhmhm!"

"Yes, Onii-sama, we'll make babies," Sakura nodded to herself with a gleeful chuckle.

"Mmhhmhmmh!"

"Of course, eight or nine."

That wasn't what he was trying to say, for Kami's sake!

"Keep her busy Naruko!" Sakura exclaimed, "I'll bring Onii-sama to safety!"

"Uh? Wh—Sakura!" Naruko's exclamation came just as he felt himself tugged elsewhere. He couldn't help but feel woozy, especially when he landed once more inside a room. Wasn't this Sakura's…

There was a live poster of him, a pillow with his image on and extremely creepy collections of stuff that held the label 'Onii-sama's belongings'.

He felt extremely worried for his sister's sanity.

Wait, what was she doing now?

"Sakura, that's not nice," he said meekly as he began to crawl his way towards the window.

"Onii-sama," Sakura replied with a bright smile, "We'll be together forever and ever!" then she twirled a kunai in her hand.

Had she snapped?

"S-Sakura! That's hardly the way to—"

"Yes, Hardly…is it hard?"

"NO!"

Sakura pouted. Her shoulders slumped. "B-But Onii-sama," Sakura sniffled, "I love you!"

"Yes, and I love you too as a sister, not as…a creepy stalker Yandere that somewhat decided to rape me in my sleep," he deadpanned. "Understood?"

"Sniffle," Sakura sobbed slightly. "Y-Yesh, Onii-sama," she sat down on his lap then.

"Ahem," he coughed.

"What? I understand," she wriggled her behind, "But it's not like your opinion matters. You'll love me in the end, Onii-sama!"

Was this what Sasuke had to go through with his own fan club?

He was actually glad when a fist slammed against the side of Sakura's face, sending the girl careening against the wall.

Then he was roughly grabbed and kissed furiously by Anko.

"Mine!" she exclaimed in satisfaction. "Got that, flat board!?"

"YOU!" chakra erupted from Sakura's entire form as she trembled. "DON'T YOU TOUCH MY ONII-SAMA YOU SKANK!"

Then she flung a fist on the floor.

On the floor of her room.

Which meant in her parents' house.

Which meant in a civilian quarter.

…

The resulting explosion devastated four houses, as Anko escaped laughing maniacally.

Tsunade watched impassively from the window.

"You're paying for the damages, Kakashi."

Kakashi nervously chuckled.

Then the Icha-Icha specialty store was hit.

"NO! ICHA-ICHA!" Kakashi began to cry as he fell down on his knees. "Those monsters! Who could teach them such things!?"

Tsunade looked at him.

Kakashi coughed and slowly stood back up.

"I'll go and stop them, Hokage-sama," he acquiesced.

"Go, before the headache kills me."

And Kakashi went.

**Author's notes**

**My muse was taken to other stories for a while. (and my hands are killing me. I think it has something to do with the keyboard)**


	51. Premonitioning

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-One

Big red bumps flared from both Sakura and Anko's heads. Naruko stood slightly in the corner, next to Shinku, as she watched the Hokage snarl down on the two.

"Anko's punishment will be decided by Ibiki," was a sentence that Anko had begun to dread, as the moment it left the Godaime's lips the purple haired kunoichi began to cry, falling on the ground among sobs.

"Nooooo please! I'm really going to become a hag by the time he lets me go!"

Tsunade then moved on to Sakura, who was fidgeting.

"And you…the damages you caused are enough to give me a headache! I expected much more from my apprentice!"

"But Onii-sama's purity was at risk!" Sakura exclaimed, "It was a necessary action!"

"I had everything under control," Naruko piped in then, "You were the one who decided to kidnap Aniki."

"I brought him to a safehouse!" Sakura rebuked her. "Like it's written on the book."

"And then you destroyed the safe house, the nearby houses, and the Icha-Icha Specialty shop," Kakashi's voice was cold and uncaring, as if someone had murdered his entire family thrice. "You need to beg forgiveness to all the lines of Tzunade-chan doing lick-lick with Ziraiya-sama!"

Tsunade was not an imbecile.

"What?"

"Uh?" Kakashi said then, hesitantly.

"No, repeat that sentence."

"And then you dest…"

"After that."

"Uh?"

"No, in between the two."

Kakashi wasn't stupid either.

He disappeared in a flicker.

"JIRAIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA."

Jiraiya wasn't stupid either.

He was already gone on a long trek-marathon around the Suna desert.

Tsunade calmed down after ranting for a good couple of hours about perverts and whatnot. By the time she was done, only two people were stupid enough to have remained next to her.

Naruko for one, and Shinku because he was actually afraid that, if he moved, he'd die.

"Anyway!" she grumbled. "Out of all the imbeciles, at least someone with a minimum of decorum remained! Naruko!"

"Y-Yes, baa-chan!?"

"Get this and go out to celebrate!" the next moment, a Chuunin vest found its way into Naruko's arms. "And you!"

Shinku nearly had a heart attack at having a finger of the Godaime pointed against.

"Take Shizune out for a date sometime in the week, she needs to be off my case because I need to get smashed, understood!?"

"Tsunade-samaaa!" Shizune wailed pitifully, turning crimson.

"Ah…of course?" Shinku laughed awkwardly, as he began to inch backwards.

"Good! Shizune! More sake!"

"Aniki! Let's go! Ramen party!"

Both 'caretakers' thus looked at one another with something akin to compassion, which just pissed off both blond 'charges'.

It was with such a reason that he found himself at Ichiraku, watching Naruko scarf down the sixth bowl.

"Jiji faif moth please!"

"Swallow before talking," Shinku deadpanned, exhaling. "Really," he rolled his eyes. He'd have to give her a welcome back home party another day, he supposed.

"Five more Jiji!" Naruko exclaimed. "Double pork!"

"All right, all right," Teuchi laughed brightly. Shinku just checked his wallet once more. If this kept up, he'd have to take a mortgage on the house to pay the food bill.

"Ah…I'm so jealous Naruko-chan," Ayame sighed. Her 'Tsukemen' experiment having lasted approximately the single day her father had been sick —and out of his mind. "Where do you pack away all those calories?"

"Uh? Ayame-neechan? This is ramen, not salt!"

Ayame sweat dropped. "I mean…don't you get fat eating only ramen?"

"Ohi!" Teuchi said suddenly, "No taking away customers, Ayame!"

"Uhm…" Naruko turned thoughtful. "Aniki?"

Shinku felt suddenly beneath the gaze of three different set of eyes.

One said 'Ramen is good, believe in the ramen god'.

The other was 'Ramen makes girls fat, tell her to pipe down on it'.

The third pair just looked at him with bright cerulean eyes and went something like: 'Aniki? I trust your judgment on the matter'.

He nervously chuckled.

"Ah…I think…it depends on the metabolism of the person? And well, you already exercise don't you, Naruko? So…maybe just go with more vegetable broth than meat one and ask for less salt in them?"

Naruko thought for the nano-second required to let the suggestion pass through her brain with the Aniki-stamp of approval, and then she nodded brightly.

"You heard Aniki, Jiji! Make it double pork in vegetable broth with little salt then!"

"All right," Teuchi smiled all the same.

Ayame pouted slightly but said nothing more.

Shinku felt as if he had just unlocked some sort of achievement that went 'Ding: Ramen Diplomacy Unlocked'.

He wiped away the sweat from his forehead, as he looked at the time at his wristwatch.

There was still quite a bit of time before he had his own 'inner' curfew set for. By the time they were done eating, and his wallet had begun to float away empty —not literally, of course— he watched with amusement as the girl began to run around like a headless chicken exclaiming in random bursts.

"I'm a Chuunin, Aniki! I'm a Chuunin! I did it! I'm a Chuunin! I'm a Chuunin! I did it! I did it!"

He chuckled, and called out.

"Yeah, I see the vest Naruko. Now that's one more thing to wash, I suppose."

"Uh-uh!" she didn't even try to say she'd be doing her own laundry. "I don't have much anyway Aniki, my underwear broke all off during the trip with pervert-sensei."

"Ah, of course it…wait."

He narrowed his eyes. "What are you wearing then as underwear?"

Naruko smiled. "Nothing!" she chirped happily, "I didn't go back to the old apartment last night, Aniki, so I'm without—"

"You're joking," Shinku deadpanned.

When the look he received back was of perplexity, he hung his head low. Of course, this was Naruko after all. She didn't have a 'funny' bone in her body at all.

"All right, let's head over there then."

"But my old bras don't fit any longer," she remarked jumping right next to him, cupping her chest. "I need to buy new ones anyway."

Then she turned thoughtful. "Ehi Aniki, can I ask you a question?"

"Yes?"

"Are you more of an ass person or a breast one? A Geisha once told me, in a whorehouse, that there are different things a man likes in a—"

Shinku cracked his knuckles, chuckling _darkly_, emitting a _dark_ aura of hell-on-Earth as his face _darkened_, and his eyes turned _dark_ with fury.

"_I'm going to kill that Toad Bastard_."

Joe Black began to sprint, taking on a nice pace next to Jiraiya who was still busy doing his long-winded marathon in Sunagakure.

"Look at the clouds," another marathon runner said. "Don't they look like Frying Pans?"

Jiraiya began to sweat cold water.

"Time's running short, boy," Joe black commented. "Eventually, you'll have to face the music."

"Have mercy," Jiraiya pleaded. "All I did, I did for porn."

"Sorry, tough luck."

And with that Joe Black sprinted off.

He had a marathon to win after all.


	52. Resolving

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Two

He was furious as he walked back home, Naruko in tow. That pervert! They had a deal! To leave Naruko alone with Geisha of all things! Really!

His pace slowed down considerably when he was in sight of his home.

Naruko, behind him, didn't realize he had stopped only she came barrelling against his back.

"Aniki?" the girl softly said, watching her brother freeze. She carefully moved her head past him, and then stilled for but a second. There was some luggage in front of their house, and…

"What are _they_ doing here?" Naruko mumbled.

"I don't know," Shinku grimaced as he resumed walking.

Sakura was the one who greeted them first.

"Onii-sama!" she waved at them, "Can we stay for the night please?" she said clasping her hands together. "Pretty please?"

Shinku looked from her to…

To his parents, and then gave a curt nod. "I…I have a guest room."

"Yatta!" Sakura fist-pumped in the air, "See Okaa-san? I told you Onii-sama would let us in!"

His hand trembled slightly as he unlocked the door, letting his…family…inside.

He received an awkward smile from his father and a curt bowing gesture from his mother. Naruko entered last, holding up a tight smile while eying him carefully.

"I can share my room with Sakura, Aniki!" she said then as he closed the door. "Oh! We can have a sleepover! Maybe I can call Hinat—"

There was a knock at the door the next moment.

Shinku opened and found himself staring at Hinata Hyuga, holding on to a bag and already in her pyjama.

"I was passing by and realized I was already in a sleepover suit, Aniki-san," she said politely. "Can I come in?"

"Of course," he said, mustering his best smile. He closed the door after that, and then went over to the kitchen. He needed a cup of coffee after this.

Showing the guest room to his parents wasn't difficult, albeit it felt forced to muster a smile to them. When he turned to leave, he stilled at the sound of his mother's voice.

"Shinku…"

He turned for a moment, raising an eyebrow.

"We'll be out of your hair by tomorrow."

"It's not a problem," he replied awkwardly.

He then wobbled back down to the kitchen and grabbed with both hands the steaming coffee mug. Sitting down on the chair, he began to sip at it quietly, before taking out the 'homework' his students had done and starting to correct it. He still had a job to go starting the next day after all.

Naruko's gaze was lukewarm at best when it met with that of Sakura and Hinata, who were both cross-legged and forming a triangle with her —a 'planning session' was in action.

"Aniki was not happy," Naruko said bluntly.

"Aniki-san did not indeed appear happy," Hinata replied immediately, moving her head up and down quickly.

"Onii-sama and Okaa-san just need to talk it out for a bit," Sakura said then. "It's been three years now. More than enough time to lay down the axe."

"W-What!?" Naruko exclaimed surprised. "Are they fighting with axes!? If you mom tries to axe Aniki, I'll have her—"

"It's a figure of speech, Naruko," Sakura retorted sporting a nervous tick-mark. "But we're leaving tomorrow morning, since the Hokage paid for the services of a shinobi who is good at creating houses from wood and…"

Hinata smiled. "Oh, leave that to me. Anything to make Aniki-san happier."

Furthermore, if she made Aniki-san happy with his mother, her own mother-in-law would be happy too. Then Naruko would be happy because her Aniki was happy, and everyone would be happy.

And she'd have a perfect marriage and a perfect family with Naruko after that.

The next day, Yamato found himself suddenly surrounded by sunglass wearing thugs dressed in black like the Yakuza, with forehead protectors with the Symbol of Konoha.

"Tenzo of Woody-Construction?"

Yamato sweat dropped. "Look, that's a stupid nickname and I'm currently heading to—"

"We are going to make you an offer you can't refuse," and suddenly, all he saw was black as they covered him with a black bag and tied him firmly to a log.

"Wait! Where the hell are—"

He felt himself being transported miles away through repeated use of Shunshin, until he heard the rumbling noise of a waterfall nearby.

"Hey! Let me go! This is against the law!"

"The Oyabun sends his regards," the next moment, they flung him in the waterfall.

"Hinata-sama?" one of the sunglass-wearing Yakuza thugs said, pushing his right finger to the communication radio in his ear, "We have delivered the package to the Highway."

"Very well," Hinata replied from her position in the Aniki-san's bathroom, "You may all take a cookie from the Good Yakuza Action Jar. No more than one per person, understood?"

"Yes, Hinata-sama!"

Hinata closed off the connection and smiled. She cackled madly for a second, thinking about the perfect plan for the perfect family, and then sauntered out of the bathroom.

Shinku, on the other hand, woke up to a heavy weight settled on his chest. He was expecting it to be Sakura, since his hand was already going to the hidden Frying pan beneath his pillow, but he froze when he heard the mumbling of ramen and 'Aniki' from the weight in question.

He pushed the sheets away slightly, to reveal the 'weight' as a frog-pyjama wearing Naruko who was drooling over his chest and sleeping heavily.

"Ramen…" she mumbled. "More…"

"Really," he sighed, trying to stand up.

Naruko suddenly hugged him tightly, to the point of making him hiss in pain —what the hell had she been eating, to get that strong?

"Don't run ramen…don't run…" she whined pitifully. "More ramen…yesh…"

"Why aren't you in your room to begin with?" he mumbled.

"Sakura…yawn…tried to leave to get to you, Aniki," Naruko muttered, now in her 'fake sleep' mode. "Hinata kept…touching my boobs…"

He was feeling some soft pressure against his stomach, now that she pointed out the 'boobs' part.

"Wasn't the purpose of a sleepover to sleep with your friends?"

"I'll see Sakura on missions," Naruko grumbled doing her worst 'I'm sleeping' imitation. "Hinata will follow me anyway…" she rubbed the side of her cheek against his chest. "I want to see Aniki more."

Then she yawned and opened her eyes blearily. She blinked, and then blushed. "Ah! I just woke up Aniki! Why am I here? I have no idea whatsoever I swear!" she exclaimed as if she was reciting some sort of script. "I think I will now take my leave so that you can head down to the kitchen a bit later and see your mother cooking breakfast because so the two of you can talk privately while me and Sakura hold off your father and Hinata has taken care of—"

Shinku's eyes widened.

Naruko brought a hand to her mouth and then closed her eyes tightly, her entire frame trembling. "I…" she muttered at last, "I said too much?"

"Does it bother you?" Shinku said after a few minutes of silence.

Naruko looked back at him, fidgeting with the end of her ponytails. "I don't like seeing Aniki sad or upset," she mumbled with a light rosy tint on her cheeks. "I like him kind and smiling."

She blushed more after that.

"Eh…troublesome," Shinku sighed.

Shikamaru sneezed, loudly. Then he realized it was too troublesome to bother and returned to sleep.

"Troublesome brat," he patted Naruko's head, and then tried to move out of the bed. "Can you let me go now?"

"Uhm…" Naruko turned thoughtful, still purring as she kept on rubbing her cheek against him. "Aniki…can we have ramen for dinner again?"

"No," he retorted. "You ate more than enough yesterday."

"But it's sooo good…"

"No."

"Meanie."

"Proud of it."

"Stingy."

"I prefer my wallet happy."

"Pretty please?" she blinked then, before adding with a sulky voice, "I'll do that thing with my tongue if you say yes."

Shinku froze.

"What?" he squawked out.

"Uh? Nadare-san said that she always got gifts when she said that," Naruko blinked back. "I don't know what I have to do with the tongue though…do you know Aniki?"

She asked innocently.

He pried her off and then headed towards the bathroom silently.

He actually flung a frying pan at Sakura, pushing her out of the shower where she had hidden half-naked, trying to catch him off guard.

He needed a cold shower.

Because he was boiling with rage.

Jiraiya was starting to grow annoyed. "Listen, I hate having people peek at me while I'm peeking!" he exclaimed towards Joe Black who was standing behind his shoulders.

"Sorry, it's not my fault," Joe shrugged.

"Gah! Anyway…Zuzade-zama…then there's zonzon and…"

"Yes," Tsunade suddenly said, appearing right behind him with her knuckles cracking. "What does Zuzade do with zonzon?"

"Oh, well, I shouldn't be telling what the next book is about but since you…" he turned his head to stare into Tsunade's eyes, "asked…" his voice grew incredibly weak.

"Kami…Help me please." He blurted out.

Up above, Kami flipped through the _Icha-Icha Saintly Porn Edition _and chuckled.

"Uh? Someone said something?" he said suddenly, looking around. "Never mind…let's get back to what Zizune does with Saint Zonzon."


	53. Speaking

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Three

He awkwardly entered the kitchen to the smell of breakfast cooking. True to Naruko's 'Master Plan' his mother had indeed begun preparing food for the morning. Coffee was brewing, water was boiling for the tea, and rice was in the rice cooker. Pots and pans were in full work mode, and as he casually walked next to her, he did something he hadn't done in more than three years.

"Naruko likes her eggs fluffy," he began as he took out a frying pan and placed it on the open flame of a free gas outlet. "Hinata eats her toasts crunchy with honey," he calmly cracked two eggs. "And I started drinking coffee rather than tea in the mornings."

"Ah," Mebuki said, exhaling slowly. "I see." She gave a hesitant look to his side of the 'breakfast preparation'. "Preparing an omelette with only two eggs?"

"I know the girl snacks away even before she eats it," Shinku rolled his eyes. "Too many eggs are bad anyway for her. I add a slice of butter and a touch of salt."

"You don't fry them?"

"Never really got the hang of avoiding the oil flying everywhere."

"That's because you probably keep the flame too high," Mebuki snorted. "It's not 'high flame equals speed' in the kitchen, you know?"

"But if it isn't hot how can I jacket it to begin with?"

"You need a calm hand and…"

Naruko smiled from her spot to the side of the kitchen's door, holding a hand to the centre of her chest as she gave a brief 'sigh' of relief. Everything was going well. Her Aniki would make peace with his family, and then…

Her heart thumped painfully once.

Nah, that was a stupid thought. Her Aniki wouldn't leave her only because he got back in good graces with his family, right?

Her Aniki was better than that. She was better than that.

She was happy, truly, for her Aniki.

Breakfast came by quickly, as both Sakura and her father descended from the stairs. Hinata came last, and in the end as they all sat at the table to eat, she couldn't help but feel overly conscious of the random stares she received from Sakura's mother and the casual glances from his father.

It just felt strange, to be more than two people at breakfast.

Sometimes, Anko would remain after a drunken day of hers and they'd have breakfast in three, but generally it always was her and Aniki.

It felt…awkward, to have others intrude on that.

She knew she was feeling possessive, but…but Aniki was _hers_. And she hadn't seen him for years and just so suddenly, after barely a single day, she had to share him.

She felt jealous, if a tiny bit.

Sakura had three years with Aniki. Hinata had three years with Aniki. She wanted her own three years too, 'ttebayo!

"So you're a Chuunin now?" the question came from Sakura's mother, and she meekly nodded.

"Y-yeah 'ttebayo."

"You earned it, I'm sure," the woman said with a small smile on her lips.

There, her jealous feelings for people intruding flew away. Aniki's mother recognized her for her merits —that was always something good in her opinion.

"You'll soon find it boring though," the woman added. "I remember those long patrol missions. I think I'll remember them until the day I die."

"Knowing Naruko's luck, her 'boring patrols' would probably turn into 'save the Elemental Countries' type of missions," Shinku replied chuckling.

"Aniki! It's not my fault bad stuff keeps ta happen—"

"Happens, not 'keeps ta happen', Naruko," he corrected her once more.

"Yeah, yeah," Naruko grumbled, before returning to her own breakfast.

When it was time for her, Sakura and Hinata to go, Shinku carefully dropped in Naruko's hands her own Bento. "There you go for the day, Naruko. No leaving the side dishes behind like last time."

"But I don't like the—"

"You will eat your vegetables young miss, or I will force them down your throat, understood?"

"H-Hai!" she made an awkward military salute before scampering off as fast as she could with Sakura in tow. Shinku sighed in mock exasperation, before taking out a copy of the house's keys and handing it over to his parents.

"I have a feeling you will need these eventually."

His mother raised an eyebrow. "We weren't planning on staying more than one night and…"

"Yes, unfortunately we both have our own little rascals who have their own ways of making simple things turn out nigh impossible. Trust me…I'm off to work and won't be back until late tonight so…just in case, a copy of the keys."

"Thanks son," Kizashi said beaming a smile. "Appreciate your trust."

"Not a problem," he then scratched his chin awkwardly. "Well…I'm off to work."

He was out in the next minute.

"Ehi," Mebuki muttered then, looking towards her husband. "Do you think…I was a bad mother?"

"Nah," Kizashi shrugged back. "You brought up two nice kids after all. Some bumps along the road aren't anything to get worried about."

"Still," Mebuki bit her lips. "I didn't even tell him I was sorry."

"Ah, for some things…I suppose you don't need to say it," Kizashi shrugged again. "Being sorry is generally enough to get the point across after all, isn't it?"

"Since when are you so high-strung?"

"Hey woman! I'll let you know I've got a brain behind this hairstyle of mine!"

"For a moment I was fooled into believing I married a smart guy."

As the couple bickered amiably, and Shinku approached his job with the same practiced ease of the years of experience he now had, Naruko and Sakura stood in front of the Godaime Hokage.

"It is clear the Akatsuki has started to move," the Godaime said then firmly. She flicked away some sand from her hair, "They have successfully kidnapped the Kazekage, and they will proceed to extract his Bijuu without fail."

Naruko's bile reached the girl's throat. "You two and Kakashi will be heading off immediately towards Sunagakure, and from there mount a rescue of our allies' leader…understood?"

Naruko grimaced, but nodded.

She created a Shadow Clone just for good measure the moment they left to prepare for the mission, and within a mere dozen of minutes she was already leaving with Sakura and Kakashi the village —without even waving goodbye to Aniki in person.

It was so unfair.

She shook the feelings bubbling in her chest down. She'd do this mission in a split-second and be back before her Aniki even realized it.

Yeah…she was a Chuunin now, going for Hokage…

There was no way someone as stupid as Akatsuki would ever stop her.

No way at all.


	54. Arranging

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Four

"That's boriiinggg!" Konohamaru yelled that, with the class halfway through the lesson. "Oyabun-sensei! What about the fight against—"

The chalk flew with precision that only a mastery of the ancient Chalk-Arts could produce, slamming into Konohamaru's forehead with exquisite finality. There was a sharp 'Thunk' as the boy's head slammed against the desk on the back.

"Gah!"

"Very well," Shinku said. "As I was saying, concerning the theoretical purposes of the second Shinobi war—"

Shinku returned to his lesson while Hanabi Hyuga, a few seats behind Konohamaru, frowned. She had her doubts the man in question was the reason her onee-sama had suddenly taken a turn for the worst —her and the entire branch house. For the love of Kami: she couldn't even go back home without being called 'Little Onesan' now by the people in the street!

She kept her gaze on the teacher, until she felt a finger touch her arm. She turned, her face bothered from such an intrusion in her personal space. The girl next to her giggled and then whispered. "Neh, Hanabi-chan…you've got the hots for the teacher?"

Hanabi probably shouldn't have yelled back, but the thing did shock her.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?"

"Language in the back rows!" Shinku bellowed. "Mo…Wait, Hanabi? Konohamaru, did you fake the voice of one of your classmates again?"

"N-No Oyabun-sensei! I swear I didn't!"

"I'm not an Oyabun!" Shinku sighed. "Fine, Hanabi? You'll remain after lesson for your punishment."

"Hai, sensei," Hanabi replied coldly. She wasn't sulking, of course…this was all a plan to find out more about the man in question.

"Oh…" Moegi whispered then with a smirk on her face. "Hanabi and the professor alone in the class," Moegi giggled.

"Shut up, insufferable plain-as-a-board kid."

"I could say the same for you," Moegi sniffed back, putting up a fake air of 'nobility'. "I'm Hyuga Hanabi, I will finish the academy in a year because I'm better than all of you."

"I said I would, and I will," Hanabi hissed.

"Silence back there!" Shinku said once more. "I'm trying to teach."

Hanabi rolled her eyes. Really, that man couldn't possibly be the reason her oneesama turned out like that.

When the lesson ended, she found herself staring as hard as possible in the direction of the man in question. He apparently felt it, because he tried a nervous smile. To be scared by her gaze…really, what a weak-willed individual.

"Now, Hanabi," he said, "Why did you yell in class? Something wrong?"

"Nothing," she replied dryly.

He raised an eyebrow. "Was there something wrong with Moegi?"

So he had some slight insight. Maybe some deduction…nothing important anyway.

"No," she clipped. "Nothing wrong, nothing strange, nothing to worry about. Can I go now, sensei?"

"Did she do something to offend you?"

"Why are you so keen on this? Isn't Moegi one of your 'underlings'? Shouldn't you be taking care to pin the blame on me rather than on her?"

"Actually, she's one of Naruko's Underlings…I just got roped in," he nervously chuckled. "And as a teacher, I am impartial. The fault goes where the fault has to go, not where we wish it should be. I don't know why you dislike me, but if you don't tell me the reason how am I expected to change my ways?"

"And why should you change? I'm the kid here, adults are always right," she bitterly retorted.

"Doesn't change the fact that I'd like to get along with every student in my care, so if you're feeling uncomfortable because of something, you can always tell me about it."

"And then what? What if I told you I spent years training harshly, coughing out blood to become the very best my father wished for, and then it's suddenly unneeded because my sister somehow grew up enough of a spine to become better than me in everything!" she bit her lips then, "And what if it was your fault then? Uh? Are you going to take responsibility for it!?"

Shinku closed his eyes for a moment. "So…"

He exhaled.

"You're jealous?"

Hanabi turned crimson, stomping her foot on the ground. "I'm not jealous of her! She's a wimp, a cry baby! Father never liked her before and now suddenly she's his favourite! It's not fair! NOT FAIR!"

She clenched her fists, shame burning her cheeks. "It was supposed to be me. He always praised me."

"And now he praises your sister?"

"Yes," she snarled out.

The man got down on one knee. "Don't you think this is how your sister felt, when you were the one being praised and she wasn't?"

She furiously looked at him, her heart painfully throbbing. That…that could be but…

"I…I don't…"

"Look, I can't say I know how you were brought up, but you know, for a long while all I did with Hinata was talk to her. She came out of her shell in her own way and for her own reasons. Maybe…you should start deciding what you want to do, rather than what you need to do to make your father praise you. Praises are fleeting. One day he'll tell you how good you are, the next he'll be angry for something else. People, all people, are like that. What he holds deep inside however won't change just because he stops saying that he is proud of you."

He smiled then. "Understood?"

She blushed, tears in the corner of her eyes before nodding carefully.

"Plus, now aren't you freer to begin with? Why not try to find something else to do? Something you can genuinely enjoy?"

"H-Hai, sensei," she meekly whispered. The next moment she found herself with a handkerchief pressed in her hands.

"There we go, now wipe away your tears and give me a smile."

She frowned. "A Hyuga never smiles. It defeats the purpose of appearing scary and powerful."

"Your sister smiles and laughs a lot, and let me tell you…she scares the hell out of me," he whispered in a low voice. "And do you know how much more scary she is when she's dressed in orange? I still have nightmares," he mock shuddered. "The scariest of nightmares let me tell you."

She giggled.

"That's a stupid thing to be scared of."

"Oh, trust me, she was holding on to a knife, an orange, and was going all 'Hey A-ni-ki-san who were you talking to this morning? You can't forget about Naruko-chan like this' and then—"

Well, now she understood why her sister liked to talk with him.

Since she was the second born…

Maybe an arranged marriage wasn't out of the deal?

Shinku's spine crawled with frost.

Hiashi Hyuga looked at the entire warehouse filled with teacups he possessed —he actually had a collection of teacups that he truly loved— and then felt the ground tremble for a moment.

The moment was over and…

All the teacups _cracked_.

They exploded to smithereens; be they ceramic cups, plastic cups, steel cups, gold cups, delicate cups, clay cups…they all cracked or broke one after the other.

Hiashi Hyuga walked outside his secret warehouse.

The Kitchen's cups were destroyed too.

"Ah…" he exhaled.

"All right," he acquiesced. "Prepare the castration squad!" he bellowed then, "Someone's going to lose it before the night falls!"

Every single healthy male Hyuga that did not belong to the Castration Squad suddenly disappeared in a flash that would have made the Yondaime —if he had been still alive— go with a 'That's copyright infringement you guys!' yell.

Shinku kept up a nervous smile as he walked back home.

Why did he feel as if his observers had suddenly spiked up in numbers?


	55. Conjuring

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Five

"The Hyuga are patrolling Konoha with their Castration Squad," a housewife said fearfully. "Why, my husband is afraid of going to work now!"

"He's a hydraulic, right?"

"Well, yours an electrician."

"That's why he's gone on a long term job in the Land of Waves. Said he'll be back when tensions won't spark so high."

"Said by an electrician, you're either cracking a horrible joke or trying to kill me with your sense of humour."

Shinku passed by the two bickering women in their mid-fifties, and headed towards the fruit section of the supermarket. He turned the shelf corner and then stopped. Wasn't he forgetting the tomato sauce? He spun around and heard a slightly startled gasp.

He raised an eyebrow, looking into a shamefaced Hanabi Hyuga carefully gazing as if to murder it a bottle of mayonnaise.

"Ehi there," he waved a hand as he walked closer. "Shopping?"

"W-Well," Hanabi coughed, concentrating. "I was just passing by, and I had the desire for a small but nutritious meal because I'm clearly trying to keep an eye out on my daily caloric intake."

"Kids these days," he chuckled. "In my times…" he stopped, "Now I'm sounding like an old man. Well, I hope you have a nice snack then," he added before moving to grab a tomato sauce bottle, and putting it in his own basket.

"I will certainly have a nutritious and balanced one, thank you very much sensei," she made a stiff bowing gesture and then resumed looking at the mayonnaise bottle as if she could kill it with a glare.

He went by the fruit section next, hanging near the apples for a while and checking for some firm and crispy ones. His nose twitched for a moment, as he turned his gaze to the side where Hanabi now was fidgeting with a banana.

"You shouldn't hold fruits too strongly," he said then as if to make conversation. "They tend to turn brown where they have been held firmly. You need a more delicate touch."

"Ah," she nervously exclaimed, gripping on the banana so tightly it actually snapped in half, sending the upper half to slam against her face and turning it to mush.

Shinku blinked.

Wasn't that something possible only in porn Doujinshi?

"Gah…it's sticky," Hanabi complained as she tried to wipe away her face with it. Shinku sighed and took out another handkerchief.

"Here you go. I told you to be careful about it."

"Thanks sensei," Hanabi murmured demurred, licking her fingers. "Guess I'll have to pay for it."

"I'll take care of that," he shrugged.

"Ah! No, that won't do sensei!"

"Nonsense," he rolled his eyes. "As a teacher, it is my duty to take responsibility for my students' actions."

Hanabi bit her tongue then. "As a Hyuga, I cannot let such a debt stand to pass, sensei."

"Now, now," Shinku chuckled. "No need to put the Hyuga name on the line here. It's nothing to incur into a debt for." He grabbed a casket of bananas and then whistled as he also placed the half-mushed one together with the rest. "Now for the milk, and then I'm done for the shopping."

"Ah!" Hanabi gasped as she watched her sensei walk away with the sheer skill of someone who can end up a conversation whenever they want. That had to require extensive training!

"Bananas and milk?" Hanabi muttered. "That's my favourite food too," she whispered to herself.

Slowly, her fingers moved together as she _fidgeted_, a slight blush creeping on her cheeks.

She had to write that down on her diary. Her secret-clearly-not-a-diary diary.

Shinku whistled as he returned home with his groceries in hand. He was actually surprised when he found out there was someone waiting for him outside the door.

He raised an eyebrow.

She looked back at him with a tenuous smile.

"I'm…getting married," she said slowly. "No one else knows, but…with Anko being punished by Ibiki I'd like to have Hinata as my maiden of honour and…"

Shinku sighed. "I'll be there," he acquiesced. "Don't expect me to deliver a speech though."

"Of course not," she replied softly. "Well…"

"Want to come in for some tea?" he hazarded.

"I'd like that."

With those words, Kurenai Yuhi stepped inside the house of her younger brother.

Who said bridges couldn't be rebuilt?

In the Hyuga household, instead, something else was going on.

_Dear Diary-Not-A-Diary,_

_Hinata-oneesama, if you read this with the Byakugan I will personally destroy your Naruko *tm* panties that you keep hidden in your drawers! You've been warned!_

_Today I discovered that sensei likes bananas and milk, just like me! He also paid for the banana I broke by mistake. He's really kind! You think he'd accept a dowry of a thousand ryos? I should ask father about that. Dowries are serious business after all, but since I'm the second born it shouldn't amount to much._

_I gave a quick glance at Hinata-oneesama's planner and tracker of sensei's movements, and have come to the reasonable conclusion that I can follow him most of the day without trouble! _

_I should probably pack a bento and give it to him as thanks for the banana accident of today. _

_But I need to prepare it myself, there's no use in buying one or letting the Hyuga branch in the kitchen do it. By the way, they keep on exchanging sake cups with each other, and father has complained the Branch Family is becoming more and more like a Yakuza. _

_Well then dear diary, I'm off to bed now. Do you think I'll dream about sensei tonight too?_

_I hope so!_

Hiashi Hyuga deactivated his byakugan then, bringing both hands to clasp together in a thoughtful manner as he swung his rotating chair to give the back to the door, which opened silently.

"Neji, my trusted nephew."

"Hai, Hiashi-sama."

The boy had a red piece of cloth strapped to the side of his arm, with a black symbol of a pair of scissors cutting out a long elongated object.

"Bring me 'sensei'."

There was a light meow as mister Fluff jumped down from the nearby drawer and landed on Hiashi's lap.

"It shall be done, Mein Leader!"

"Good," Hiashi cackled evilly as Neji left, clicking his boots together and standing to salute. Hiashi petted the head of mister Fluff, whispering dangerously to himself.

"Soon, mister Sensei, soon…"

"Meow!"

"Of course mister Fluff, here are your kitty-cat snacks."

Shinku heard someone ring the bell at the door, and excused himself from the conversation with his older sister to answer.

He never came back.

**Author's notes**

***BABUUUMMM* *TSS TSS* You know, thunder and lightning in the sky.**

**And I couldn't help the Evil-Bond Enemy references. **

**Long. Live. Fluff.**


	56. Bond-ing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Six

"I was expecting you, Mister Haruno," Hiashi said creepily, turning his chair to face Shinku while holding a white fluffy cat in his lap, and gently caressing him.

Shinku looked to the side, where Neji was standing tall and with a rock face, his arms behind his straightened back.

"Or should I call you sensei?" Hiashi drawled out.

"Ehm…is something the matter, Hyuga-san?" Shinku began to sweat.

"Is something the matter, he says," Hiashi drawled. "Explain to me one thing, Mister Haruno…did you truly think I would not find out?"

"In my defence, she began all by herself," Shinku said quickly, understanding where they were headed.

"Oh? And you just let it go, didn't you?"

"Well, she's a bit difficult to say no to," he acquiesced. "She was saddled on to me after all."

"Saddled?" Hiashi's brain brought up a mental image he quickly squashed. "Is that a new term?"

"Well, hoisted maybe?"

Another horrible mental image soon removed by his brain cells.

"Hoisted?" Hiashi's voice cracked. "Is her…purity still safe?"

"I don't think so, what with the way she acts now…really makes you wonder how she learned all that so fast without practicing."

Hiashi smiled.

Neji took a few steps back.

"Mister Haruno," Hiashi said. "You will take responsibility, yes?"

"Ehm…I think the responsibility is on Naruko actually."

"The Uzumaki…girl?" Hiashi brought up another mental image. That one floated around for a few more minutes, before he firmly tore it apart. "Your charge?"

"Well, she's a Chuunin now, she can take care of herself," and it was Naruko's fault that Hinata had turned for the worse, there was no doubting it even for an instant.

And Naruko had better chances of escaping Hiashi's wrath than him, that much was true too.

"Still, the one she appears to be infatuated with is you," Hiashi remarked.

"That's only a front, she told me it's all a way to get closer to Naruko and have a family with her."

"And HOW IN- ahem—" Hiashi coughed, "How exactly would that be possible?"

"She said something about adopting," Shinku replied.

Hiashi closed his eyes. He nodded firmly. "Ah, I see. The Byakugan does not lie…you are telling the truth."

He opened them again. "Still, you are responsible for your charge's actions as her guardian."

Shinku swallowed noisily. Where was his Anbu guard when he needed it?

"Looking for someone?" Hiashi said then with a smile, pushing a button on his desk. A corner of the room suddenly turned, revealing Yugao Uzuki tied to a rope, dangling atop a pool of acid that was actually bubbling.

"You know that's a crime," Shinku deadpanned.

"Uh? It's not a crime, just clan business," Hiashi retorted making a knowing nod and laughing madly. "A father's love is never a crime!"

"As expected from Hiashi-sama!" Neji exclaimed, laughing next in a falsetto tone.

Shinku sweat-dropped.

Yugao actually coughed politely. "I am being paid to enact this scene to scare you, Haruno-san. You have nothing to fear. This is just green tea... boiling green tea."

"Silence!" Hiashi exclaimed, "Don't ruin my moment!"

"Wait, this is all a practiced play?"

"No! I mean, yes, of course it is!" Hiashi exclaimed nodding furiously. "If it weren't, how could I convince the Anbu to look the other way while I menacingly castrate you?"

"What?" Shinku began to take careful steps backwards.

"Now, now! No leaving! Neji!" Hiashi barked, "Are the tools ready!?"

"Hai, Hiashi-sama!" Neji disappeared in a flicker, returning with a pair of evil-looking red-hot giant scissors.

"Are you sure this is just a play?" Shinku mouthed towards Yugao, who just gave an affirmative nod.

"Of course, how could they possibly lie to an experience Anbu such as myself?"

Somewhat, that didn't console him at all. Especially because the 'green tea' wasn't only sizzling, but also because a fly that had flown inside wasn't coming out.

"Ehm," Shinku coughed. "Can't we reach a discussion like men?"

"Why, Mister Haruno? Soon you will be Miss Haruno after all," Hiashi laughed. "Think positive: a Hyuga never hits a girl."

"Just out of curiosity, when does the play end?" he asked then.

"After the castration has been successful of course!" Hiashi cackled madly. "Let the _Castratekrieg_ begin!"

Neji's eyes shone for a moment as he grabbed the scissors.

Shinku exhaled. "Very well," he sighed. "I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice," he closed his eyes. He breathed in deeply just as Neji began to walk closer to his important 'bits'.

"I think I'd like to get married."

The wall broke to smithereens a few seconds later, as Neji slammed against the opposite wall with needles pinning him down.

Shizune walked in laughing awkwardly. "Ah, I was just passing by and I heard the funniest of things!" Shizune exclaimed clapping her hands. "As a single woman in the prime of her age, I wonder if there is any young and equally exciting stud who'd like to—"

"This is preposterous!" Hiashi yelled. "What of the guards outside!?"

"Uhm?" Shizune cocked her head to the side. "What guards?"

Hiashi looked out of the wall, holding on to Mr. Fluff. All the castration squad members had needles pinning them down or paralyzing them into sleep.

"Preposterous! How could you do this!? My castration squad! My pride and joy!"

Tears fell down Hiashi's face. "You monster!"

"No force is strong enough to stand between a _single_ woman nearing her fourt—ahem, her twenties and a husband!" Shizune exclaimed loudly.

Shinku's eyes dropped to a half-closed state, as he then turned to gaze towards the Anbu.

"Get me out of here," he mouthed.

"All right," Yugao nodded. "The play is over I suppose."

The next instant, he was brought back in front of his house.

Shizune spun around as fast as she could, but she missed the Anbu and her ticket out of being a lonely hag with a bunch of cats.

She gasped.

"That…THAT THIEVING BITCH!" Shizune wailed. "THAT WAS MY FUTURE-HUSBAND! ARGH!" screaming, Shizune disappeared too.

Hiashi looked towards Neji.

Neji looked towards Hiashi.

"Uncle…women are scary."

"Indeed nephew, they are."

The door of the studio then slid open, as Hinata walked in with a happy smile plastered on her face.

"I heard something funny going on in here about Aniki-san."

The wails and the screams of the two Hyuga males continued way into the dawn.

**Author's notes**

**My hands have begun to hurt like crazy towards the night/morning period. Which is why to even write this was **_**excruciating**_**. I think it's a matter of the weather…because really, Arthritis so young seems preposterous. (I'm in my twenties).**


	57. Teenaging

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Seven

He heard a soft knock at his door in the middle of the afternoon. He frowned, before carefully standing up from his spot on the armchair and heading over to the door in question.

He stopped midway through. Last time he had opened the door for no reason whatsoever, he ended up nearly castrated…

This time, he wasn't going to risk it.

Shinku looked through the peephole for a moment, and then burrowed his brows upwards in perplexity. He opened the door the next moment.

"Naruko? Don't you have the keys?" he asked as the girl sheepishly scratched the back of her head and looked downcast.

"Ah…I forgot about them, Aniki," Naruko muttered, entering the house after kicking off her sandals.

"Is everything all right?" he asked slowly. It was a first to see the girl come back after a mission without telling him anything about it.

"Yeah," Naruko nodded meekly. "What's for dinner?"

"Ramen to celebrate your return from the mission?" he hazarded as a question.

"Ah, yeah," Naruko's smile was…forced. It didn't feel right.

"Did something bad hap—"

"Nothing," Naruko shook her head. "It's nothing you need to know."

Then she left for her room. He frowned and brought his right hand to his chin. Was this…

The Rebellious Teenager phase?

He walked off towards the kitchen, deciding to start working on a homemade ramen, when he heard the usual noises of someone under the shower. Well, he supposed Naruko was just tired from the mission. He'd set out a glass of milk out of the bathroom on a chair, and then return to his cooking.

He began to whistle a happy tune. He'd have to tell the girl about being invited to a marriage —he had told Kurenai there was no way he'd keep Naruko away from it. Sure, it had taken a bit of talking to get her to accept the idea that she was no longer a loudmouth braggart who'd tell everyone in the next five seconds, but it had worked.

He was sure Naruko would appreciate the gesture, and for some reason girls loved going to weddings.

Everything was fine. There was no stalkering, no watching, no Sakura trying to make babies or Shizune at the door.

It was a perfectly normal afternoon.

Everything was calm, quiet, and Shinku actually chuckled to himself at the thought. Letting the broth boil, he grabbed his book and began to read once more.

He flipped a page. He heard the door of the bathroom slid open from the floor above.

He heard the sliding of the chair.

Then, he heard the crashing of glass against the floor.

He was on his feet and on the first floor in a moment, just to stare at the angry, red-faced Naruko's trembling form as she breathed in and out slowly, having thrown the glass of milk against the floor.

"I'm…not…" she croaked out, "A baby."

"Naruko?"

She left in a flicker —far faster than what he could catch with his eyes. The door of her room slammed close then.

"Naruko!" he exclaimed.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Shinku blinked.

Then he sighed.

Yes.

This was the Teenager period, no doubt about it. He went back down in the kitchen, shaking his head in disbelief. He was sure Naruko would come down when she got hungry.

Naruko didn't come down when she got hungry. She simply left from the window. He realized that after waiting two hours for her to come down to eat dinner, and receiving no reply.

He supposed a ninja wouldn't really have troubles leaving the house.

He looked up at the ceiling of the kitchen, before draining the noodles —they'd just turn soggy anyway— and putting them aside. He'd drop the broth in the fridge and heat it for another day.

"Really…what's up with her?" he muttered. He turned off the lights and left, after closing the door.

"Uzuki-san?" he asked to the thin air.

"Yes, Haruno-san?"

"Have you seen…"

"She is on top of the Yondaime's head."

"Of course," Shinku looked towards the monument's heads, before beginning his walk.

"If you'd like, I can bring you there in a moment," Yugao suggested.

"No need…I still don't know what to tell her to begin with," Shinku replied, as he began to mull over the possible reasons.

Maybe Sakura was wounded? Or their sensei? Probably could be that the mission took quite a bit of time, or that she had to depart so abruptly? There were many reasons a teenager could be moody. Now, if he found the right one, then he could deflate the moodiness sooner.

The slope to reach the top of the monument was easier now on his legs —after the 'torture' of the Spandex Duo, this wasn't something difficult at all.

He reached for the top of the Yondaime's head in half an hour, only to watch at Naruko's form slamming her fists against the hard rock of the fourth's head.

"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! I…Stupid!"

He quietly observed her trying to deliver a headache to a stone head, before she finally stopped and began to sniffle.

"You had to choose me, dad…uh," Naruko mumbled. "You couldn't have taken someone else? Anyone…else?"

He carefully began to climb the slight final slope before standing straight on the head of the Yondaime, gritting his teeth as he did that.

"I'm not sure someone else would have been suited for the role," Shinku exclaimed then, trying to rein in his fear of falling to his death. "I mean, where else do we get someone so knuckleheaded we have to pursue her in the middle of the night?"

"…" Naruko turned the other way, crossing her arms over her chest and remaining quiet. There was a moment of silence, before Shinku raised an eyebrow.

"So, what happened?"

"I'm not telling you," Naruko deadpanned.

"And why not?"

"Because I don't wanna."

"I don't—"

"I don't want to! I know! All right!? I know 'ttebayo! I know how to speak if I want to! And I don't wanna do that now!" she yelled back. "I dun wanna." She muttered then softly.

"Fine?" Shinku chuckled nervously. "Then—"

"You can go," Naruko mumbled. "You've got work tomorrow, Aniki. And I'm staying here for a bit more."

"You sur—"

"Yes," she nodded. "I'm sure."

And with those words, a strange sulkiness settled in Naruko henceforth.

**Author's notes**

**Let's get back on track. More serious stuff coming right up.**


	58. Refusing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Eight

He opened his eyes the next morning to the sound of the door closing abruptly. He sighed as he brought his right hand up to his forehead. So, Naruko had left that early in the morning? He supposed she'd be going for a jog and then return for breakfast.

Shinku walked downstairs, half-expecting to find the kitchen in tatters. He instead saw a message written and placed on the table with the unmistakeable Naruko calligraphy.

_No need for breakfast, or bento. Signed: Naruko._

He frowned.

This cold shoulder treatment was perplexedly the strangest thing that had happened to him now. He couldn't understand the reasoning behind it, but unless he asked someone who was bound to know…

He opened the door and headed for the garbage bins of his house. They looked as if a raccoon had been working through them, so he just made a hesitant guess.

"Sakura? Hinata?"

The next instant, both girls were 'at attention' in front of him.

He sweat dropped. "Really," he muttered under his breath. "Did you two have breakfast already?"

"No, Aniki-san."

"No, Onii-sama."

"Come on in then," he shook his head in disbelief. He was starting to develop a sixth sense for these type of things. As he placed the water to boil for the rice and prepared the omelettes, he asked quietly.

"Any of you know why Naruko's like this?"

Sakura frowned. "Like how, Onii-sama?"

"She didn't act strangely at all with you?" he returned her gaze with perplexity.

Hinata was puzzled for a moment, before taking out her bloc notes. "I asked Neji-Nii, who went to help Naruko's team…but he said that nothing different happened. Then again he refused to take her tampons back from…"

The twin gaze of shock silenced Hinata. For her side, she believed complete and utter collection of everything Naruko-esque was perfectly fine but…oh well, she'd deal with the Heretics another day.

"The mission was…well, it was a bit difficult," Sakura acquiesced. "We met with Akatsuki and…it was tough. They took Gaara and for a while he even seemed to be…"

"What are you trying to hide, Sakura?" Shinku's eyes narrowed slightly. "You always hesitate when you try to avoid saying something bad."

"It's…It's nothing Onii-sama!" Sakura exclaimed. "Really nothing! Just…they were really tough and for a while Gaara even looked dead, but then he got back up because Chiyo-sama took care of it but…" she bit her lips, "She died after that…because of the strange technique she used."

"Someone died during your last mission?"

"Well, yeah but…she chose to and because otherwise Gaara would be the one dead and…" she fidgeted, "I…I got really close to dying too against Sasori of the red sand and—"

Shinku's arms hugged tightly on Sakura's head, as the pink haired girl made a startled gasp of surprise. He pulled away his arms when he realized Sakura was unzipping his trousers.

"Really you," he growled. "What do I worry about you to begin with?" he sighed in mock exasperation. "So, nothing else happened?"

"No Onii-sama," Sakura said with a light pout. "Why don't you ask her?"

"If she answered me, I'd try," he rolled his eyes. "I'll try anyway this afternoon. Hopefully I'll get a straight answer out of her."

"If you don't, don't worry Aniki-san," Hinata replied smoothly. "I will most certainly cross reference my Naruko-mood charts while examining her clothes and calling forth a spirit to ensure healthy child—"

Once more, the look of shock that settled on the heathens face perturbed Hinata. How could they not believe in the sanctity of her dark spells to ensure Naruko had a happy life? Really!

They were looking at her as if she was a stalker or something, and she wasn't a stalker. Never mind the mini transmitted in Naruko's pillow, so that she could hear her breathe when she slept…or the life-size Naruko plushie dressed with Naruko clothes she hugged at night.

"No, maybe it's for the best…I might just be exaggerating after all. It's not like she'd suddenly flip for no reason, right?"

"I don't know Aniki, but we're leaving tomorrow," Sakura muttered. "There's another mission really important coming up and…maybe you should try and settle things tonight?"

Shinku exhaled, and then nodded. He could manage that much, couldn't he!?

That night, he tried to strike up conversation with Naruko.

She disappeared in a flicker, without even giving him a spare glance.

That stumped him.

There _had_ to be a reason why Naruko was now outright refusing to talk to him. It was as if she was but a ghost, coming and going from the window. She kept the door of her room locked and whatnot. Really! He was actually afraid for the state of the room, with no one cleaning it.

He couldn't just barge in though. He was her guardian, but…there was a limit to what he could do.

If the girl didn't want to talk, who was he to force her?

He didn't even have the will to cook. Since Naruko wasn't probably going to remain in her room, he decided to head over to the Ramen Stall.

"Another portion, Ayame-neechan!" Naruko's voice reached his ears then, just as he was closing in on the stall. So the girl had escaped to the stall, hadn't she?

Wait. So she was acting like that only with him?

What had he done now?

"Isn't Shinku coming tonight too?"

"Ah…yeah, Aniki's swamped with work right now," Naruko retorted.

Shinku clenched his fists.

"A pity," Ayame muttered. "So you're leaving tomorrow morning?"

"Yeah Ayame-neechan!"

"And you can't even spend the day with your Aniki uh, poor darling," Ayame said. Shinku could imagine her shaking her head.

"It's…It's not a problem," Naruko mumbled out. "I mean…I'm sure I'd be only a bother."

"Nonsense," Ayame chided her. "He should stop with his work and come right here to enjoy dinner with ramen."

Shinku opened the flaps of the ramen stall in that moment, "Why, it seems like a wonderful idea." He held a bright smile on his face as he sat down right next to Naruko, who stared at him slack-jawed and with her eyes just as wide as those of a doe caught in the light did.

"A-Aniki," Naruko blurted out, before returning to her ramen bowl.

"Naruko!" he exclaimed then, "Seems ages since we last saw each other," he smiled brightly.

Ayame carefully took a step backwards.

She had heard the stories of the Smiling Demon that inhabited Shinku's soul whenever he began smiling like that.

She didn't want to meet it. The stories said grown men cried, and perverts burned in hell after seeing that smile.

Teuchi on the other hand took over just in that moment.

"Ah, Haruno-kun, what will it be?"

"I'll have pork ramen," he pointed out.

He then gave a gaze to Naruko's ramen. It was the usual vegetable broth with just a pinch of salt…so that couldn't be the reason, could it?

"I'm sorry I was busy with work, Naruko," he said then softly. "I did manage to free myself in time though, so…how did your mission go?"

Naruko froze there and then.

She clenched her fists and then, calmly, through gritted teeth, she replied.

"Very. Well."

"Is that why…" his voice trailed off, not wanting to make a public scene.

"Oh! I forgot to water the plants!" Naruko exclaimed suddenly. "Have to go, bye Aniki, pay for me all right!?"

She tried to dash off.

"Hey!" Shinku exclaimed, but it was too late. The girl had already left.

"What just happened?" Ayame blinked from her spot behind the counter —and with a metal ladle between her and the Smiling Demon.

"I…I don't know," Shinku hung his head low. "I really don't know."

"It's just a phase," Teuchi whispered, with some sort of conspirator-like tone. "I'm sure she'll be back to normal by the next mission."

"I hope so," Shinku mumbled. "I really hope so."

He ended up simply paying for Naruko's share, before returning home. He was just about to head off to bed, when a thought struck him.

Well, it couldn't hurt to try.

He prepped a Bento in less than an hour, before depositing it calmly on the desk and leaving a note on top of it.

Scribbled on it were a few, choice words.

_Good luck out there, Naruko._

The next morning, the contents of the Bento were_ in the garbage bin_, and the note had another childish scrawl belonging to Naruko on it.

_I'm not a baby who needs a packed lunch. I don't need a guardian worrying about me. __**I don't need you**__._

Shinku crumbled the note in his clenched hands.

Fine.

She didn't want to be babied.

_Fine_.

She didn't want to have someone worrying over her.

_**Fine!**_

If she didn't want him to fuss, then she just had to say so!

Wasting food like that…

He blinked.

The Bento was gone from the kitchen's bin.

Meanwhile, on a nearby chair, Hinata was munching with her cheeks swollen on the food.

She was sort-of like a squirrel in that, with her eyes wide open and staring back at him.

"Munch. Munch. Munch."

"Ehm…"

"Naruko touched it."

"It was in the garbage," he deadpanned.

"Naruko's trash is Hinata's _precioussss_ treasure."

"You're licking the bento box."

"Naruko touched it."

Shinku nodded slowly, as he backtracked. "I'll be going then."

"Have a nice day Aniki-san!" Hinata smiled brightly.

With that…he left for work. Yet he couldn't help but wonder…was it really his fault?

**Author's notes**

**Who understands women is good.**

**Who understands Gollum-Hinata should be checked for mental problems.**


	59. Killing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Fifty-Nine

Kakashi Hatake was not having a pleasant stay in the hospital.

For one thing, he was without porn.

For another, he had to hear the ramblings of Shinku.

For a third, he was actually forced because the man had pretty clearly told him that he'd stick Gai on him if he even tried to ignore him.

"And really, that's not a normal way to act! Naruko never acted like that before, so something has to have happened back during the mission," he insisted. "Are you sure nothing changed?"

"Yes, nothing changed," Kakashi drawled. "Nothing at all."

"Really nothing?"

"Yes," Kakashi sighed. If it weren't for the enticing 'pie' Shinku had brought him, which hid within a collection of Icha-Icha, he would have feigned being asleep.

As it was, Shinku Haruno was his porn pusher, and he _needed_ his fix of porn after the Icha-Icha Specialty Shop was destroyed.

He growled as Shinku narrowed his eyes on him for a moment, before he finally relented. "The only thing I heard is how they're supposed to meet with an informant who was a spy for Orochimaru at the Heaven and Earth bridge."

"A spy for Orochimaru?" he brought up an eyebrow.

"That's all I know and I'm technically going against protocol by informing a civilian about such a matter that is unrelated to you, but she is your charge so I'm actually forced to tell you if anything psychologically traumatic happened to her…and _nothing_ happened."

Shinku sighed, before handing over the 'loaded' pie to Kakashi.

"Enjoy then…" he grumbled as he waved the man goodbye.

"She did say something strange though," Kakashi added. "Well, actually she half-grumbled it."

"Uh?"

"Something about '_snapping'_… Not that I understood much after that."

Shinku kept his face filled with perplexity even as he left the hospital lost in thought. What did he mean with 'snapping'…snapping fingers? Snapping…maybe napping? Was Naruko tired?

He sighed.

Whoever understood females was a god.

Naruko Uzumaki stared at Sasuke Uchiha from her position, with Sakura, Sai and Yamato present. She looked at him and clenched her fists.

The Uchiha came down with a bright smile on his face, and then chuckled. "I cut away those bonds…" he began, "Because they tied me down."

He began to unsheathe his blade. "What about you, Naruko? Still tied to your a-ni-ki?"

Naruko exhaled. Her face suddenly relaxed.

"You know, Sasuke," she smiled. That smile made Sakura sweat.

That smile made Yamato inch quite a few meters backwards.

That smile was a perfect, plastered copy of the Demon Smile *tm*. Sai mentally jolted it down.

"I _tried_." She placed her left foot backwards.

"I thought I'd do him a favour too. I saw the Akatsuki, and the way they act. I saw Kankuro on the bed nearly dying because he tried protecting Gaara. I saw the corpse of Gaara, and Chiyo-baachan giving her life for him. I saw it…" she clenched her fists, "and I realized I was just being _selfish_. If I wanted to act even a bit in the best interests of Aniki, then _staying away from his life_ would be the best possible thing for him."

She gritted her teeth.

"I ignored him. I avoided him like the plague. I snapped at him. I insulted him. I trashed away any effort he made, even when he was simply trying to understand why… and it _hurt_." The last part, she hissed.

"If losing your family means never seeing them again, if it means feeling like all hope is lost, then yeah, I understand that pain now. Aniki isn't going to forgive me for what I did, how could he? And I'm angry all right, I understand your anger now, because I'm angry at myself so much I can't even stand to look at my reflection in the mirror. I can't stand to be in the same room with someone who took away my family, and when that someone is _**me**_, it's even harder…" she babbled out, her eyes shining slightly.

"But now I _know_ how you feel, so I have to ask…even after all of this, even after all this sorrow, this hate…do you still love your brother?"

She shuddered.

"Because _I do_…and if I suffer this much, if I'm so much in pain…it's because _I_ _love him_ even now."

Sasuke eyed Naruko warily, and then replied coldly.

"I _hate_ my brother, and what you feel is but a speck. I lost my entire family, my entire clan; you didn't even lose him _properly_. How can you even think they compare? I should reiterate my past offer then…want me to come back to Konoha? I'll graciously accept…" he smiled, eying Yamato.

"Ah…" Naruko exhaled, then cocked her head to the side. "Then this is it, I suppose," she stopped smiling.

"_**I'll just have to kill you then**_."

Sakura's eyes widened. Yamato tried to say something. Sai's movement stopped in perplexity.

Sasuke took a step _backwards_.

The next moment, the ground exploded as Naruko charged ahead. Sakura brought her hand up to protect her face from the debris lifted, as Sasuke found himself pummelled through the ground by Naruko's onslaught.

"_**I'M NOT LETTING YOU NEAR ANIKI! UCHIHA OR NOT, I'LL SLAUGHTER YOU! I'LL SNAP YOUR BONES AND TEAR YOUR LIMBS APART UNTIL NOTHING REMAINS! I'LL BREAK YOUR SPINE IN A THOUSAND PIECES AND PLUCK YOUR EYES OUT AND SMASH THEM ON THE GROUND!"**_

As the two battled far away with various degrees of destruction, Sakura sweat dropped and chuckled nervously.

"I…think someone pushed her berserker button."

Yamato paled. "The Kyuubi could break free!"

Sakura stared at the devastation. "Sensei…there's not a hint of the Kyuubi chakra here."

"Uh?" Yamato blinked. That was true. "Then how is she…"

"Oh, hell has no fury like a woman's scorn," Sakura giggled. "Although in this case, I think it's 'hate' rather than scorn."

"You…don't care about your 'ex' teammate?"

"He's a traitor who wounded Onii-sama," Sakura deadpanned. "He can die whenever he wants!" she smiled brightly.

"Wait, so the reason you insisted on this mission wasn't to rescue him?"

"Well, Naruko wanted to try," Sakura mumbled. "But then again, the reason shishou didn't place Sasuke in the missing-nin list was because I asked her not to." She fidgeted. "I wanted to be the one to help kill him, you know," she added hastily. "But I'll leave it to Naruko for the moment."

She took out a small book and then began to scribble down. "If I'm so much in pain, it's because I love you, Onii-sama," she giggled lecherously. "This is a sure win. I'm pretty sure of it!"

Near them, the ground still trembled and shook as the screams of "DIE! BURN! MAIM!" were followed by "OH GOD MY HAND! MY LEG! STOP!"

Yamato just brought a hand to his face and sighed.

Orochimaru watched the scene from his hiding spot, and then sighed.

As fast as lightning, he substituted Sasuke's now battered body with a mud clone, and then left quickly because the girl —or better yet the Banshee— realized it.

"Hurts," Sasuke mumbled in pain.

"Yes, yes," Orochimaru rolled his eyes. "The way she stomped your balls fifty-four times makes me wonder if you actually have the Sharingan."

"No…techniques…"

"Uh? She used no techniques? Interesting," he commented.

Naruko exhaled as she slammed her fist straight through Sasuke's pelvis. The mud clone actually winced before disappearing in…well, mud.

Naruko growled, before slamming her fists on the ground and snarling out.

"You damn coward!" she hissed that. "You damn…bastard…"

Then she began to sob.

Sai remained far behind, and then decided to scribble down a small note.

_Understanding of the female teenager is proving more difficult than expected…more materials required._

**Author's notes**

**There was such fluff in here that I felt my cavities act up.**

…

**Fluff for everyone!**


	60. Halting

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty

Naruko fidgeted in front of the door. She clenched her hand, before opening and moving it quietly towards the doorknob. She could do this. She entered the house, and croaked out.

"I'm home."

No one answered her.

She froze. She took more steps forward. It was late, Aniki was supposed to already be finished with work. She cautiously sniffed the air. There was nothing cooking. The house felt…quiet, empty even.

Her feet brought her to the kitchen where everything seemed…quiet? There was no frying, no cooking, no boiling or whatever. It was dinnertime, wasn't it? Aniki never was one for missing dinner.

She ran upstairs, barging in Shinku's room with her breathing short.

The room was tidy. There was nothing amiss except the open window.

The open window and kunais slammed on the wooden pavement of the room that is. She felt her throat dry up. Her hands began to sweat as whatever words dislodged from her brain clammed up in her mouth. Had…had they taken him?

Had Akatsuki taken him?

She gritted her teeth furiously; her eyes narrowed to fissures while her hands clenched so tightly blood began to drip from where her nails dug in the skin.

She was going to kill them all. She was going to butcher them all so slowly they would think twice before even trying something like this again, and she would ask Aniki to forgive her even if it was impossible, because she really had no other way to…

She crumbled down on the ground, her knees giving in as her entire frame began to tremble.

Whom was she kidding? They had taken him from Konoha, even though he was supposed to have a guard! How was she going to defeat them? What if he was already dead? What then? How could she face him? Nice way of being a sister, insulting him and all that. What if she didn't even get the chance of saying she was sorry? He'd die believing she hated him.

She shook her head firmly. She had to calm down. Maybe there was still time to find him.

She wobbled back on her feet and breathed deeply, before exhaling.

"I'm coming to find you, Aniki," she swore. The next instant, she was out of the window.

She'd start by asking Baa-chan.

The moment she barrelled in the office, she found herself staring at Shizune crying her eyes out in the place of the Hokage.

"Shizune-neechan!"

"Naruko!" Shizune bawled. "Your team came back to report, why weren't you with them?"

"Ah! I went…home," she hazarded. "Never mind that! Where is Shinku-Aniki!? Did someone kidnap him!?"

"Oh, he didn't tell you?" Shizune said, blinking.

"Ehm…no," she nervously looked sideways.

"Well, then I can't tell you Naruko. I'm sorry," Shizune muttered.

"So you know where he is, Shizune-neechan?" Naruko pried then, staring at her. Shizune took a step back, why was Naruko smiling like that? Had Shinku taught the technique of the Smiling Demon to someone else!?

"H-Hai! But I can't tell you."

Naruko cracked her knuckles, before growling softly. "How about I set you a date with someone I know who'd like to find someone to marry and settle forever?"

Shizune stilled. Her brain tried to fight the logical part of the question. Her heart was trying to ignore the brain.

Her _ovaries_ decided for her.

"The Nara Shrine, he's there for—"

She didn't get anything more as Naruko was gone in a flash.

"WAIT! WHAT ABOUT MY FUTURE HUBBY!?" Shizune wailed from the window.

Naruko created a clone.

"Go and call Maito Gai," she growled. "It will teach that skank to get close to Aniki." Her eyes shining darkly, Naruko dashed through the rooftops with as much speed as she could muster.

"Yoh Naruko, going some—" Kakashi had been barely discharged. When Naruko literally slammed past him, he twirled in mid-air before crashing back through the hospital window and ending once more in the intensive care unit.

Naruko didn't stop.

She reached for the outskirts of Konoha sweaty and panting, but she still didn't stop.

What was her Aniki doing at the Nara shrine? It didn't make sense! And why couldn't Shizune tell her!?

She stopped on a nearby branch as soon as she heard the sounds of chattering.

"It will be such a wonderful marriage!" Anko's voice cackled out. "You think the Kimono makes me look fat?"

"Anko," the tone of voice was of warning enough. "Remember why I got you out of Ibiki's punishment."

That came from Aniki's sister.

She too was wearing a kimono, albeit hers was white just like her face.

Was she getting married?

But then…why hadn't Aniki invited her too?

"Of course," she muttered, "You just had to go and act difficult," she dropped her shoulders low.

She jumped on another tree, trying to find Aniki's voice throughout the muttering.

"You think Kakashi's going to make it?" this was the voice of Shikamaru's sensei.

"YOSH!" Maito Gai exclaimed, "My rival will absolutely get the rings for the marriage without fail!"

"Keep it down!" Asuma hissed. "I shouldn't have forgotten them."

Naruko sweat dropped, and then carefully crept on another tree.

"So, the brat's giving you problems I heard?" that was Baa-chan's voice.

"I don't know," her heart skipped a beat. _**That**_ was Aniki's voice.

"Uh? I heard she's been ignoring you pretty much the entire time."

"I'm sure it's just a phase," Shinku shrugged. "Still, it's a pity she's not here. I'll save her some cake for—" It was then that he heard the sound of the wind whistling. It was like when a missile soars the air with incredible speed. In less than a fraction of a second, he brought his frying pan of doom in a defensive position.

There was a terrible and resounding _**GONG**_ as the frying pan slammed against Sakura's face.

Shinku stilled.

He carefully dislodged the frying pan from Sakura's face —actually observing the depiction on the other side of said pot— and then eyed her warily.

She was holding a beatific smile on her face as she meekly and sultrily whispered.

"It hurts so much…Onii-sama," she brought her hands to her chest, "Because I'm in love with you!"

Then she scampered to hug him.

Naruko slammed both of her feet down on Sakura's back, sending the girl to crash on the ground inside a crater.

"Get. Away. From. My. Aniki!" she snarled, before blinking and then sheepishly jumping away from Sakura's twitching form.

"Ehm…" she muttered, embarrassedly now the centre of attention.

"Naruko," Shinku said then with a hesitant smile. "I'm glad you could…make it?"

Naruko sniffled.

Her eyes turned watery.

And then she sent caution to the wind and hugged him as tightly as she could.

"Urgh!" Shinku hissed out. "Ehi! Ehi, pipe down!" he exclaimed, his face turning blue. "Really! You're choking me…can't…breathe…"

He flailed his arms wildly, but Naruko just didn't care. In the end Shinku lost his balance, falling with his back against the ground and wincing. He brought his left hand to the back of Naruko's head, his eyes soft.

The girl _was_ sniffling in his loaned suit after all.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry," she muttered with her cracked voice.

He sighed, before patting her head.

"It's all right," he whispered. "I forgive you."

Naruko just wailed harder at that.

Sai, from his not-so-hidden position, brought up another small scribbled note.

_More material absolutely needed. Proceed with extraction of unhelpful librarian. 'Good luck' is not an acceptable answer._

**Author's notes**

**I love cake.**

**And death.**


	61. Bonding

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-One

Naruko fidgeted; she sat on a bench with an empty spot near her, watching as Shinku, who acted in place of his father, brought Yuhi Kurenai towards the altar.

Kakashi sensei had apparently barrelled into the intensive care unit too soon, and while slightly late had managed to get the rings in time.

Now, as Shinku sat down next to her after having 'delivered' his sister to the altar, Naruko kept her gaze low. She didn't know what to say. 'I'm sorry I acted like a spoiled brat' didn't seem to cut it, and she just couldn't stand not saying _something_ to him.

Therefore, she fidgeted.

A few seconds of terse silence strolled by, as Baa-chan went on with the marriage words. Next to her, Sakura was drooling with her eyes glazed over, probably imagining herself in that position.

Aniki's hands rested on his lap, as his gaze was concentrated on the bride. Naruko bit her lips and then, slowly, brought her right hand forward. She stilled halfway through. Her hand was sweaty and probably calloused from the amount of kunai flung. In contrast, her Aniki's one was probably smooth and dry.

It was a minor thing, really, but she couldn't help but think it over once more.

The old hag was still droning on, her Aniki was still there by her side but…

She just wanted to grab his hand. It wasn't supposed to be difficult. She had done it so many times before, when she was five or so and pulled him along nearly everywhere around Konoha.

It wasn't supposed to be difficult!

She swallowed nervously, and then, finally, extended her hand fully.

She gripped onto it carefully, prying it slightly open to clasp it better.

Moving her thumb, she could feel his knuckles. She felt him move and froze. Well, of course he was going to react to her holding his hand, right?

Naruko watched him turn his gaze to her, raising his right eyebrow in curiosity. She made a small, hesitant and awkward smile. Her hand was sweating even more, her heart drummed in her chest.

He said nothing. She couldn't trust her throat to speak.

"And thus I declare you husband and wife," Baa-chan's voice came finally through. "Kiss and let's get to the booze now."

Naruko turned scarlet.

Shinku instead was simply perplexed. He suspected Naruko had to tell him something, but judging by how she was fidgeting and whatnot…

Did she have to go to the bathroom?

The kiss done, the groom and the bride left through the door of the temple. Soon there would be a buffet at the Yakiniku Q, but first the group would have to change back into the 'everyday' attire. The marriage was to remain a secret after all.

Naruko felt herself pulled upwards by Aniki's hand, and as she stood, she felt her heart give away. She felt woozy. She clamped down hard on the hand, stumbling and falling on the side only to be quickly caught by Shinku's arms.

"Hey, you all right?" he whispered as he held her.

She turned even redder.

He brought his forehead down to hers and when the two met, the only thing Naruko was seeing was the red of Aniki's eyes.

Steam left her ears as she watched Shinku's lips —too close to her own— curl into worry. "You're a bit warm, you sure you're up to the buffet? We can go home if you're feeling sick."

His hot breath on her face made her breathing ragged. "Ahn…Ah…I…"

There was a low growling sound.

Sakura's emerald eyes locked down furiously on Naruko.

_Target Acquired._

She sped like a bullet, ready to slam on the ground Naruko, when her Shishou's hand firmly clasping on her shoulder stopped her.

"Now, now," Tsunade said. "You don't want to pay for the Nara shrine repairs, right?"

Sakura began to sweat bullets. "No, shishou?"

"Good!" Tsunade smiled. "Let's go hit the booze!"

Meanwhile, Shinku was still holding on to Naruko's shoulders. "Well, I suppose there's nothing to it then," he said. "We'll be going home," he added. "Wouldn't want whatever Naruko got to stick around."

Kakashi eye-smiled, "Of course, _nobody likes being in the hospital_, _**right**_?" the last part was said with a bit of an inflexion, as if to convey the words 'I sincerely hope you get the intensive care unit treatment'.

Naruko chuckled nervously, but said nothing as Aniki carried her outside. She hadn't slept much —and probably the fear for Aniki being kidnapped had sent her on an adrenaline spike— but now she just felt…light headed?

"Oh well, no other choice," Shinku exhaled.

"Kyah!" Naruko exclaimed as she felt herself lifted on Aniki's back. "A-Aniki!" she stuttered out.

"Hold on or you'll fall," he said sternly, shaking his head slightly. When her arms moved to circle his neck, he began to walk once more.

"Really," he mumbled, "You'll shave off years from my lifespan if you keep this up."

"Sorry," she murmured back sheepishly, pushing her face against the centre of his shoulders. She gave a hesitant sniff and relaxed. Aniki smelled as usual of a mixture of spices —for cooking— leather —the books' covers— and ink. The last one was for homework he had to correct at home, she supposed.

"It's all right," he replied. "So, want to talk about the mission now?"

She stilled, tensing on his back for a moment. "Ah…it's stupid," she whispered. "Really stupid."

"Oh, now…can't be that bad, right?"

"Yes, 'ttebayo," she muttered. "I acted like an idiot. I…I should probably go back to the Academy or something like that. Just…the Akatsuki are scary strong, and…people died or were wounded and I was scared, so…"

"It's all right," Shinku said. "Being scared that is, it's perfectly normal. Shinobi face difficult trials, they enter tough fights and they always risk dying. Civilians in a shinobi village suffer from the same risks, but it's their choice. You can't let fear cloud your judgment on the field now, Naruko."

"It's not that," Naruko grumbled. "I wasn't scared for me."

"Hey now," he chuckled. "You aren't this scared for Sakura or your sensei, are you? And I can take care of myself, Naruko."

"But…"

"No buts," he said then, rolling his eyes. "Stop worrying so much. Your Aniki isn't going anywhere anytime soon."

"I should have left you alone on that bench," she muttered weakly. "If I had, then you wouldn't be risking your life."

"Risking my life? Nah," he chuckled. "I'm not risking my life. I'm doing what I want to do, taking care of a troublesome little sister among other things."

"Are you ever going to get angry at me?" Naruko muttered.

"Uhm…" Shinku thought it over. "Probably never."

"Too good to be true," she mumbled. "What if one day I wake up, and you're no longer there? What if it's just a dream?"

"Well, in that case," he chuckled. "I'll hope you'll remember me fondly, but still go on with life."

"Why?"

"The past cannot be changed, but it is up to us to decide for our future. To close ourselves to what surrounds us…it's to ignore what is there. You can't do that. Maybe you feel that I'm important to you but, in the end, I'm just your brother. You have friends, teachers, and other people around you that care for you too."

Her grip on his neck tightened like a vice.

"No," she said. "You're my Aniki, my precious bond. You'll always, always be important to me."

"Even if I baby you?"

"Uh-uh," she meekly said, with her face warm.

"Even if I coddle you?"

"Yes."

"Even if I accidentally read your diary?"

"Y—Wait. WHAT!?"

Shinku laughed then, grabbing onto Naruko's legs strongly to avoid her falling down.

"Ah-han! You thought you had hidden it well, didn't you? But an older brother will always find the diary of his younger sister! It's a rule of life!"

"Y-You!" Naruko stuttered out, "You didn't read it, right!?"

"I might have skimmed a few pages," he chuckled. "So…who's the guy you like?"

Naruko turned a deeply shade of red.

Steam erupted from her every pore.

"I-I d-don't h-have one! A guy I like I mean! I don't have one! I haven't written about one!"

"I'm yanking your chain," he chuckled. "I wouldn't read your diary anyway," he commented.

"Ramen swear?"

"Uhm…ramen swear entails?"

"You don't eat ramen for one week if you break it."

"A veritable torture," he chuckled. "Right! Speaking of ramen…how many did you eat recently?"

Naruko closed her eyes firmly and made her 'fakest' snoring she could muster.

"Ehi!" Shinku exclaimed, only to receive no response. "Very well!" he muttered. "I'll cure your cold, you just wait." He chuckled darkly. "A leek up your a—"

Naruko just smiled as Aniki kept on ranting about strange and funny ways to cure the cold. She was fine now.

She was holding Aniki close and he was holding her up, they were walking back home in peace and with no one interfering or interrupting. It was…

It was beautiful.

She really hoped such a moment could last forever.

Unfortunately, it wouldn't.

**Author's notes**

**Feel the power of the dark side of the Fluff.**

**I nearly felt like wringing my hands out at the written part with the 'holding hands'.**

**Damn. Damn my muse! **


	62. Teaching

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Two

"It's difficuuuuuuult," Naruko whined, slamming her head against the table. "Difficult, difficult, difficult," she mumbled, repeating each 'difficult' with a head-slam. "Asuma sensei helped me, but it's still difficult! Gah!"

"Trying to put Wind chakra in your Rasengan?" Shinku asked back from his spot near the oven.

"Yeah," she mumbled. "It's harder than it looks, Aniki," she grumbled. "Really, really hard," she murmured, rolling her head against the table's surface.

"I'm sure you'll manage something," he pointed out. "After a good night of sleep, everything turns out better."

Naruko didn't reply; she simply closed her eyes from fatigue. Her nose twitched slightly as the perfumes of the dinner being prepared reached her nostrils, and a small smile formed on her lips as she heard Shinku's 'noises' of him cooking.

The window was open and a light breeze came in, making the room comfortable to be in.

She yawned slightly, feeling the impromptu need to doze off, when something caught her attention.

Naruko heard the 'clink' of a plate being placed on the table, soon followed by another…and then _one more_.

Her eyes opened immediately, before she narrowed them down to two thin fissures. She scrunched her nose up, her attention spiking up as soon as her brain connected the dots.

Someone else was coming for dinner.

It would explain the roast in the oven.

She grumbled slightly as her mood soured.

Was it a woman? It had to be a woman. Someone she knew, because there was no way he'd invite home someone she didn't know.

It could be the saggy-breasted hag; maybe she had finished her punishment. It could even be Shizune-neechan. She had to be careful around her now, after sending Maito Gai her way…she probably had a few chips on her shoulders to pick.

She scoffed. Maybe it was Sakura? Kami, she hated having to pry Sakura off Aniki. She always felt horrible, even when it was fine to do so because Sakura crossed the line.

"Aniki?" she said then, "Who's coming for dinner?"

"Uh? Ah, Ayame," he replied calmly.

Ayame?

Naruko's eyes opened in perplexity. Ayame was…normal.

There literally was nothing wrong with her that she could think of. "Ayame-neechan?"

"You know of another Ayame?"

"Why?" she asked then, perplexed.

"She gave me a few good suggestions about how to deal with a moody teenager," he pointed out, before winking in her direction. "Thought I'd thank her with dinner."

"Dinner, uh," Naruko mumbled with a slight hint of bitterness.

"You said something, Naruko?" he asked turning his head towards her —busy as he was with the last preparations, he probably hadn't heard her.

"Nothing," she said, shaking her head. "I should get in the shower," she added. "Is Ayame-neechan going to sleep over?"

Shinku sputtered. "What? No! I suppose not," he replied, then his gaze glazed over, as he turned thoughtful. Naruko made a 'tsk' sound and headed towards the bathroom.

Maybe it was a matter of breasts? She looked at her reflection in the mirror...no, it probably wasn't something like that. It probably was a matter of age, or of 'maturity'.

A glint of mischievousness suddenly appeared in the corner of her eyes as an idea popped in her head. Oh…

That was such a _nice_ idea…

Shinku felt cold. He didn't know why, but he shuddered and looked towards the window.

"Think you can add a spot for me?" Joe Black asked from the window.

"Who the hell are you to begin with?" Shinku asked back, perplexed.

"No one," and then he left…leaving a sighing Shinku behind —for a shinobi village, this was actually a normal day.

When Ayame knocked at the door and he went to open, he half-expected some trouble to happen. It turned out he was worrying for no reason whatsoever, and even Naruko had a chipper attitude on her throughout the entire night.

Really, he had been worrying over nothing.

The next day, both of his eyebrows rose at the same time.

"Iruka Umino has taken leave for the next month," a senior teacher told him. "He will be substituted by Miss Uruki Nazuma," the old man then gestured towards the woman at his side. She had red hair, a pair of thick glasses covering her face and sported a chuunin flak jacket that was the epitome of 'clean'. A few loose strands of hair escaped her otherwise 'neet-like' ponytail, and she sported the stiffest smile he had ever seen.

She looked every bit like the anti-social old hag librarian, but he sincerely hoped that wasn't the case.

The only thing that was slightly off —barring the horrendous long and _purple_ gym trousers she wore, was the way her flak jacket was slightly open to reveal a decently sized bust beneath it.

"She will be in your care, Haruno-san," the elder teacher droned. "Show her the ropes."

"I will be in your care, Haruno-san," the woman replied with a meek voice, making a firm and polite bowing gesture.

"Ah, I'll…take good care of you?" he replied nervously, before warily eying the retreating back of the senior teacher at the Academy.

Then, the woman waited.

He swallowed nervously for a split-second, and finally spoke.

"You should zip up," he pointed towards her chest. "We're dealing with kids here."

"Ah, of course," she obeyed in less than a second.

"Well," awkwardly, he gestured for her to follow him. "If you're to substitute Umino-san's hours, then you'll be in charge of the same class as me. If you have any question that the teacher's courses didn't cover, please ask me. You should receive a copy of the contact information of every teacher in the Academy pretty soon anyway, unless you already have it?"

She nodded quietly.

"Well, I'm Haruno, Shinku Haruno," he said then with a small smile. "And well, I'm sure every teacher likes to say this but…my class is a bit… _special_."

He then opened the door, and from one of his sleeve out came a frying pan.

Naru..Ahem, _Nazuma_'s eyes widened as she watched him deflect a volley of rubber shurikens, before grabbing by the scarf Konohamaru and spinning him into a scarf-cocoon.

"Troublemaker number one: Konohamaru Sarutobi," he deadpanned. "Side-kicks Moegi and Udon are approachable as long as subject is neutralized," he gave a light 'thunk' on the head of Konohamaru. "Better luck next time, Koko!"

"I hate that nickname!" Konohamaru screeched. Udon and Moegi both politely bowed as they brought the boy back to his seat.

"What is your relationship with Sensei?" a dry voice called next, coming from the side of Nazuma. A chibi-Hyuga stared at the woman with frost and a poisonous glare.

"She's the new assistant; Iruka-sensei took a month of leave for family reasons."

"Understood, sensei." The Chibi-Hyuga bowed stiffly, and then returned to her spot…not before eying her and silently delivering the threat 'I'm watching you so you better not try anything or I'll rip your guts out with Jyuken strikes'.

"Don't be scared if at first they don't trust you yet," Shinku said, just as Nazuma was sweat-dropping from the glares she received. "Just smile and be as gentle as possible. They'll come around."

"Now class," he said, "Say hello to Uruki-sensei."

"Hello, Uruki-sensei!" there was a cough of 'four-eyes' from somewhere in the class.

Nazuma smiled and politely bowed. Mentally, she decided to stick a kunai through Konohamaru's ass next time they met.

"Hello class," she said with a bright smile. "Let's all get along, all right?"

She was going to show it to Aniki! She could so act mature! There was no spoiled brat in the house, no sir! No need to call over Ayame to 'thank' her or whatever. She was a Chuunin, she was 'old enough to drink booze and get laid' as Anko said it…albeit she had no idea why someone would need help 'getting laid'. Didn't one go to sleep alone anyway? Where did one need help in 'laying'?

She ignored that feeling. Everything was going to be fine. She had left more than enough clones way back to work on the technique. There really was no need for her to begin with, and after talking about it in private with the Godaime, they had made a bet on it. If Aniki discovered her, she'd have to pay half of the Hokage's sake debt in Konoha…but if he didn't and she completed the Rasengan before, then she had agreed to place a restraining order on Shizune.

And she was going to win this bet.

_Dattebayo_.

**Author's notes**

**Academy Antics...death.**


	63. Examining

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Three

If she had to be honest, she had never considered her Aniki a scary person. He had always held a smile on his face, and the most perturbed he had ever been was with a scowl.

Yet, he was scary and in a way, one that she would have never suspected possible.

"You will all do this test _without_ cheating," he said firmly. "If I catch any of you cheating, I will rip your test in front of you and keep you after school, to do it again," his eyes were gleaming pits of darkness. "If any of you even thinks about peeking at your neighbour, or about whispering to one another for hints or help, then I will drag you both through five jogs around the Academy, while forcing you to yell 'I am a Cheater' as loud as you can." He cackled maniacally.

"If anyone even has the slightest hint of as much as trying to peek at their books, or their slips of paper hastily prepared and held in their sleeves," Konohamaru swallowed nervously, and then actually swallowed said slips. "I will have you take the test again, _five times_, and each time the questions will be different and I will then pick the lowest grade out of them."

Finally, he smiled. "And if by some sheer luck or chance you managed to copy or cheat through the test, and I realize that…I will forever mark your grades as a solid C even where you should earn an A," he gleefully held his chalk —a black chalk— in his right hand. "Have I made myself clear!?"

"YES SIR!" the students stood to attention spontaneously.

That was how the testing began.

Naruko sweat dropped when she saw the entire student body diligently start writing on their papers without even trying to bring up their necks. They were so concentrated on writing that they didn't even bother to remove the trickles of sweat falling down their chins, or take a moment to catch their breaths —a few were actually turning blue!

"You need a gentle smile and a firm hand," Shinku said then, "Because with a gentle word and a bad mark, you earn more than with only a gentle word."

"Ah…Yes," she nervously chuckled. "Of course."

The test was completed in less than an hour, as the students who did not know the answers simply chose not to write anything —or outright fantasize about it.

The small chatter in the classroom began soon after the last test dropped on the pile, as the students talked between themselves on how they did and what answers they gave.

"You take half," Shinku said pointing to the pile. "Correct them with a pencil first and I'll check how you mark stuff."

She stiffened, before nodding quickly.

It was eerily quiet in that small bubble, as her pencil's tip scratched on the papers of the students one by one.

Quite a number of the answers riddled with bad grammar stood out, together with poor sentence structure. A few even had the commas in the wrong spots. Having edited for Pervert-Sensei, she was knowledgeable on the grammar aspects…

But the Academy stuff? Had it always been this difficult?

_Calculate the trajectory a head has when it is flung by a metal bat through the air that comes at a speed of…_

_If a punch hits you in the stomach and the strength of blow ruptures your innards, at what speed do you vomit your bowels considering the following data…_

"I usually brainstorm with Morino-san for the questions," Shinku said good-naturedly. "He wanted to become a teacher too, but the Hokage preferred him as the head of the Torture and Interrogation department."

Naruko swallowed nervously.

The students _read_ these questions and answered to begin with?

"I see," she replied, trying to keep up her 'cool, crisp and mature' persona. She swallowed nervously. _What the hell_ was the 'kinetic barrier associated with the air pressure'?

"Here," Shinku handed her a spread-sheet. "The answers."

She grabbed it gladly and smiled hesitantly. "Ah…well…"

"Don't worry," he shrugged ticking off a few more points from a sheet. "Konohamaru! What exactly does it entail to do a 'One-san trick' in question five?"

Konohamaru stuttered, before crossing his arms over his chest. "What's written on it, Oyabun!"

Naruko briskly looked at question five, and then sweat dropped.

_You're surrounded by enemy shinobi and can reasonably count on five kunai and seven shurikens. Knowing that a kunai can kill one man and half and a shuriken can kill only half a man, what is the total number of enemy shinobi you can kill? And what is the highest number of shinobi you can wound and kill at the same time?_

"I'd rather hear it out from you," Shinku deadpanned. "I do have an inkling on why you'd write 'if they're perverts I'll defeat them all' on your sheet, but I want your answer all the same."

Naruko began to sweat.

Konohamaru looked around frantically for an excuse, before he finally caved in.

Naruko mentally decided to kick Konohamaru for failing in keeping his mouth 'shut'.

"She'd use her Oiroke Technique to appear as a naked woman, plus using Kage Bunshin to make male variants for females," he meekly said. "Please don't kill me." He added as an afterthought.

"That's half a mark," Shinku remarked dryly, scribbling it down, "Because you're _expecting_ things from the enemy and from yourself. Many times you do not get to choose the setting of the battle or your opponents, saying something 'if I had the Kage Bunshin' is wistful thinking at best, Konohamaru."

The boy nodded meekly, a loud sigh of relief escaping his lips.

"By the way, for the use of crass language and perverted attitude you'll hand me by tomorrow one hundred lines on 'I will not imitate One-san in battle'."

Konohamaru's head went 'thunk' against the surface of his desk.

"Uhm," Naruko meekly said, "Who is this 'One-san'?"

"Ah," Shinku blinked. "She's...my sister," his face brought up a fond little smile that made Naruko's heart skip a beat. "Little rascal goes around corrupting innocent children," he shook his head slowly. "Not that Konohamaru has ever been innocent to begin with."

"Sensei!" Konohamaru whined.

"Oh, shush it Koko."

"_**Don't call me Koko!"**_ Konohamaru screeched like a monkey.

The lesson was over soon after that, and as she stood to leave, Aniki's voice reached her. "Uhm…is there anything you wished to ask about the lesson plan?"

"Ah, no," she shook her head. "Everything is clear, Haruno-san."

"Please, when the students are gone all teachers call each other by name."

"Shinku-san?"

"Yes," he made a brief smile, before collecting his stuff and starting to whistle.

Naruko watched him leave after saying his goodbye…and then she flickered out of the academy to the rooftop, dropped her henge, dirtied her Chuunin flak jacket, and then, finally, arrived home with her breathing ragged dry.

She dropped her jacket clearly in sight and then went for a shower.

Everything was fine now.

The moment she came down after her shower, one arm circled around her neck while the other hand came down with its devastating knuckle attack, ruffling her scalp to near-ignition.

"NARUKO!" Shinku exclaimed, "Why did you teach the Oiroke no Jutsu to Konohamaru!?"

"AH! I YIELD, ANIKI I YIELD!" she flailed her arms wildly, as her Aniki let her go after a mere huff.

"Really," he sighed, proceeding to pat her head afterwards. "I'll have to get the parents together for the 'talk' preparation."

Around Konoha, cups shattered in the hands of the fathers that held daughters in the Academy's class that Shinku taught...and a dark foreboding chill ran down their spines.

Naruko just chuckled nervously. "Sorry," she mumbled meekly, her gaze downcast as she tried to fidget with her right leg behind her left, her arms crossed behind her back to boot.

"Cut the act," Shinku rolled his eyes. "It's all right, just remember to keep an eye out for young impressionable minds out there that might learn questionable techniques."

"Will do, Aniki sir!" she mocked the 'salute' and then sat down, resting her head on the side of the table. "I'm hungryyy…"

"Food's incoming," Shinku's voice came from the corner of the kitchen.

Naruko smiled with her eyes half-closed.

Aniki wouldn't know what was about to hit him!

**Author's notes**

**Fluff.**

**Fluff.**

**Fluffy death incomiiiinggg.**


	64. Fallinloveing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Four

"So, tell me Uruki-san, what made you decide teaching was your way?" Naruko held the teacup in her hands, the pleasant aroma of tea reaching her nostrils as she pondered over the question her Aniki had asked. She was in her Uruki persona, during the lunch break for the academy teachers.

"Shinku-san…you can call me by my first name too, you know?" she said back trying her best 'embarrassed' and 'meek' tones.

"Oh, all right," he said, averting his gaze for a moment. "Nazuma-san?"

"Yes," she nodded firmly. "And well, I suppose it runs in the family," she muttered. "My father's a teacher at the civilian school, my mother's a private piano instructor," she added softly, recalling her 'background'. "And I have a younger brother who's completely dumb," here Konohamaru began to sneeze, "So I decided to become a teacher to follow after them."

"Ah, nice," he smiled briefly, "I have a younger sister too," he added. "She was a hard worker back in the school, but there were…circumstances, and so she needed a hand," he muttered. "Now I'm glad to see she can stand on her two legs," he chuckled. "Ah…good old me is going to be left behind eventually," he clapped his hands together. "Then again, you've got to let your kids fly when they're grown up, right?"

She would have wanted to blurt out 'Never!' but she held her tongue. She looked sideways nervously. "I…Ehm…I'm sure she'd never leave you behind."

"You can't keep on staying with your parents until you die of old age though," he replied with a small smile, "eventually she'll fall in love and put up her own family, and I'll be the wonderful uncle who comes around every now and then with the cousins in tow," he chuckled. "That's pretty much all there is. It's life, it's not like you can change it."

"Or you could buy a giant mansion," Naruko said then, "And everyone would live together forever!"

She bit her tongue the next moment.

"Ahah," Shinku chuckled, "You finally relaxed enough? I knew you were trying to act considerate, but there's really no need to walk on eggshells around me. You can relax."

Naruko closed her eyes and sighed, before a mischievous smile settled on her lips. "Oh? Really?"

"As I said, I'm—"

She dropped her head on his lap, "Then, mister Haruno, I'll use your lap as a pillow for now."

"G…Good night?" hearing him stutter made Naruko inwardly chuckled, as a satisfied smirk —a womanly satisfied smirk of course, which displayed all of her maturity— settled on her face.

When Naruko returned home, she was ready with her 'trained too much' excuse.

The problem came when she realized her Aniki wasn't cooking, but staring at the moon from the window with his hands holding on his cheeks. He had a longing gaze and exhaled slightly, a small smile on his lips.

She froze.

She froze and stared wide-eyed.

"A…Aniki is sick?" she screeched then, starting to run around with her arms up in the air. "ANIKI'S GOING TO DIE NOOO! PLEASE, HELP! CALL THE—"

"NARUKO!" Shinku exclaimed, turning sharply to stare at her and stilling her on the spot. "What are you—"

"ONII-SAMA'S SICK!?" the door exploded as a lecherous Sakura arrived, holding enough instruments in her hands to make her look like some sort of mixture between Freddy Kruger and Jack the Ripper. "Does he have an headache!? I heard that masturbation works in making headaches disappear!"

Hinata appeared behind Sakura, neck-chopping her into unconsciousness. "Excuse us."

Silently, she grabbed Sakura and hoisted her over her shoulder, before leaving from the door after making a polite bow. Two black garbed Yakuza-like Hyuga arrived next, taking measurements of the door before replacing it in a flicker with a new one.

When they were done, they bowed too and then left, leaving behind only their business card.

_Hyuga fast repairs. So fast, it's just a shunshin away!_

Shinku sweat dropped.

"Why exactly do you think I'm sick, Naruko?"

"Dinner's not done," she stated plainly. "Wait a minute…are you perhaps a spy?" her eyes narrowed, as she took on a defensive posture, before saying darkly.

"_I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you._ _If you let my Aniki go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and __**I will kill you**__."_

"Really?" he brought up his eyebrows, "Come on then…_test me_."

"My favourite food?"

"Ramen, double pork, especially if home made."

"Favourite breakfast?"

"Omelettes, I have to bat you away with two spoons and a frying pan."

Naruko began to lose her defensive posture…

"The film I like?"

"Ramen Kamen, the Superhero from the land of Food," he actually shuddered as he said that. The film was stupid, but still…

Better than Hentai Kamen to begin with.

Naruko deflated, sighing in relief. "All right! Then…make me an Aniki dinner!"

He chuckled as he moved closer to the girl and ruffled her hair. "How about we go out for dinner, since I forgot?"

"Uhm…" she narrowed her eyes. "Did something good happen today, Aniki?"

"Not particularly," he chuckled back. "Just fell in love."

"Ah, all ri— WHAT THE FUC—"

Outside, Hinata narrowed her byakugan eyes. "Ah…"

She gripped a pair of sunglasses, even though it was late at night.

"Someone's about to be," she placed the sunglasses on her face, "_Terminated_."

"Uhhh haiiii uh-uh, uh uhhhh I believe I'm in—"

"SHUT UP YOU!" she hissed furiously to the Hyuga Quartet, which were training their vocal chords for the upcoming festival.

Elsewhere, Hanabi Hyuga huffed and pouted as she stopped using her own Byakugan.

"I clearly eye-told the bitch to stay away from sensei," she cracked her knuckles. "I'll have a word with her."

"Dum-Dum-Duuumm…"

"Shut it, you!" she screeched to the organ player of the Hyuga household —the one in charge of making spooky music for Mr. Fluff and Hiashi-sama when they 'entertained' some guests.

Sakura twitched as her hand emerged from the mound of compost Hinata had flung her in. She clawed her way out, a massive freaking smile on her face as her eyes began to bleed tears of red —tomato sauce, from the garbage.

"I…will…have…him…"

Joe Black simply began to sharpen his scythe, humming to himself.

"Oh happy days…ohhh happy dayss…."

All in all, Shinku felt the foreboding chill move closer and closer to the rupturing point…

And that didn't bode well at all.

**Author's notes**

**I couldn't resist.**


	65. Fightclubbing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Five

Naruko ducked. Five volleys of rubber kunai and twenty shuriken —among which a few were actually real— flew at her the moment she stepped into the class.

Five barrels of paint, twenty-seven water balloons and four pellets of stink bomb soared through the air next. She parried, sent back or otherwise avoided the entire 'attack'.

Then, calmly, she smiled and stared at the perpetrators.

Shinku entered the classroom next, a mop in hand.

"This is the fourth time in a row," he muttered. "Whoever is doing this, please come forward," he said then through gritted teeth.

There was no reply from the class.

"Very well then," Shinku sighed as he watched the stern and stone-faced kids. "Lessons will take place outside for today too, Nazuma-sensei will have you train in Taijutsu. Please, for the love of Kami avoid turning the courtyard into a mess _again_."

He had no idea why things had turned out like this. He just knew something had gone horribly wrong, and now the entire class no longer seemed made of rational children, but of jealous and vindictive banshees. If he had to guess, he'd say someone was purposefully making the class angry at Nazuma.

Shinku couldn't really understand why. The woman was quiet most of the time, polite, smiled gently and…and she wasn't trying to actively get married or in his pants. She was a serious and well-behaved woman, a Chuunin who loved teaching and had a situation similar to his, and who had all the signs of being a 'perfect' match.

At least, to his eyes.

He whistled happily, a dreamy sigh escaping his lips. She had such wonderful red hair…

In the courtyard, meanwhile, Hanabi Hyuga took the ring. She punched her left open palm with her right hand closed in a fist.

"First rule of Kick the Bitch club: you kick the bitch."

Naruko sweat dropped. "Who taught you those bad words, Hanabi-chan?" she said, putting on her most mature air.

"Hinata-oneesama said to tell you this: they're not bad words if they're the truth."

A nervous tick mark appeared on Nazuma's forehead. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, a female dog in heat is a Bitch after all."

"I am not in heat, and I find your words highly offensive and crass, unbecoming of a proper Hyuga," Nazuma said, putting up an air of 'superiority'…because she knew words like 'offensive' and 'unbecoming' now.

"Hissssss…" Hanabi hissed next, gritting her teeth furiously. "Fight me!"

"No," Nazuma replied curtly. "You can fight…Konohamaru," she pointed to the boy, who swallowed nervously. "Go on, Koko…"

"_**I AM NOT KOKO! FOR THE LOVE OF KAMI, STOP CALLING ME KOKO!**_" Konohamaru yelled as he stomped into the arena.

Just as the match was about to begin, two voices came melodiously through the air.

And by 'melodiously', it meant that Naruko's ears twitched in annoyance.

"Excuse me, sensei?" Sakura had apparently entered the courtyard, waving at her and holding a bright smile on her face.

"Oh my, hello there Sensei," Hinata's voice came next. They both were smiling as they stepped in.

Suddenly, it felt as if a dragon stood behind Hinata's back, as a tiger stood behind Sakura's own back. Behind Nazuma's however, was a giant fox.

There was an exchange of sparks.

"Yes, what can I do for you?" she smiled, twitching nervously and completely ignoring Hanabi venting her anger on Konohamaru, or Konohamaru venting his anger on Hanabi.

"I would like to know how Hanabi, my sister, is doing," Hinata smiled. "And if your teaching methods are appropriate for an upstarting Hyuga clan member."

"I'm here for the medical check-up all teachers must submit," Sakura replied, taking out a syringe. "It won't hurt a bit."

"Ehm," Nazuma sweat dropped. "I'm busy at the moment. As you can see," she pointed towards the scene of Hanabi punching Konohamaru's nuts, "They need constant surveillance."

Konohamaru flung some dirt in Hanabi's face, before pushing the girl down on the ground and starting to pull on her hair.

"Konohamaru, Hanabi, enough!" she barked, whistling sharply. She brought both hands to her hips as the two students kept on fighting in the middle of the arena, until she stepped inside.

The moment she did, the moment she walked close enough to separate them, they both grabbed her legs and pulled her down.

"What the—"

Hanabi's elbow slammed into her guts, making her wince —thankfully, the Chuunin Flak Jacket wasn't there only for show.

Konohamaru's knee came up to hit in the same spot as Hanabi's elbow, making Nazuma growl as she jumped backwards. "So this is how it is uh, brats?"

"I'm not letting you take the Oyabun away from One-san!" Konohamaru exclaimed, taking up a defensive posture.

"I'm not letting you pass ahead of Onee-sama," Hanabi added, "She said she'd share sensei with me!"

Hinata stood beatifically in the sidelines, whistling a happy tune while holding a 'Go Hanabi' flag in her hand. Sakura meanwhile carefully disappeared for the Academy's inside.

"Very well," Nazuma said, cracking her knuckles. "I'll personally teach you Taijutsu then."

Then she stilled. She couldn't use her own Taijutsu with Hinata nearby. She couldn't use her techniques with someone she knew so close.

She…had to use the Academy style.

She hated that style! It was so full of…of…

Argh!

There really was no choice. Her own, personal 'brawling' style was too easy to recognize. She took position, and then charged ahead.

It was, in retrospect, something stupid to worry about; when she had been in the Academy, nobody had wanted to help her out —except Iruka-sensei, but he always yelled rather than just _talk_. Shinku-Aniki didn't know squats about the Academy style, and so that was the only thing she had to work on her own.

The moment her fist connected with Hanabi's chest, the girl flew back, slammed into Konohamaru, and then the two spun and fell on the ground.

She winced at the strength of the impact —she hadn't wanted to put that much strength in the blow.

"You both all right?" she asked demurely, running to their side.

In that moment, Sakura returned with Shinku. "And you see, brawling with the students is clearly a sign of being a horrible—"

"Sakura," Shinku deadpanned. "All that I'm seeing is Nazuma-san treating the students. And I saw that attack: it's the first one in the Academy style. Really, that's teaching no matter how you look at it."

Sakura growled, her emerald eyes locking on Naruko's. The moment Shinku passed by her, she made a clear 'sliced neck' gesture towards Nazuma.

Naruko swallowed nervously. Was Sakura always this bloodthirsty?

"Well done," Shinku said. "Was the problem solved finally?" he asked, his gaze moving from hers to those of the two on the ground.

"I…I'm not…defeated, yet!" Konohamaru grumbled, slowly wobbling back on his feet. "For Onesan, I'm not letting her…"

Twin fists ricocheted off his head, as he received one from Nazuma and one from Shinku.

"Ouch!"

"Really," Shinku grumbled.

Nazuma looked sideways. She wasn't supposed to know, was she?

"Is something the problem with me?" she said then, with her most innocent tone. "Did I do something?" she blinked, settling her 'mature and demure' gaze on Shinku.

She watched Aniki blush and look sideways.

Aniki blushed.

"Ehm… can we talk about this privately?" he mumbled, gripping tightly on Konohamaru's head.

"He loves you," Hanabi deadpanned, stating the obvious. "Now _refuse_ him, so he can go between the arms of Oneesama."

A crow cawed as it flew in the air, leaving behind three black ink drops.

A gust of wind breezed in the courtyard, carrying a ball of hay.

The crickets stopped making noise.

Nazuma's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Ah…I…I'm sorry, but…" her heartbeat came out painful as she forced herself to speak, "We barely know each other, so..." demure and mature; she had to act demure and mature. Squealing was _not_ demure and mature.

"Understood," Shinku replied in a smooth voice. "But it's not a no, right?"

"I…didn't say no," she croaked out, turning red and averting her gaze. "To getting to know each other, that is…"

Hinata clicked her tongue against her teeth.

What was it with the lovey-dovey atmosphere?

"Well then," Shinku coughed. "The class is once more useable, but since we have yet to find the culprits for the trap laying, you will all make five rounds around the Academy…on march!"

As the students groaned but began their run, Shinku then turned to both Sakura and Hinata with a serious gaze.

"Did you two need something?"

"No," Hinata replied calmly, "We are taking our leave…" the fact Sakura tried to say something but was knocked out cold by Hinata of course meant nothing.

It was a common occurrence.

Nazuma coughed nervously, trying a small smile.

She had to act mature. She had to act mature. What did a mature woman do now?

Oh, if only she had a mature woman to talk to! If—

Wait a moment.

There was a mature woman she knew of.

A serious, down to earth, mature woman.

"Are you free this Saturday, Nazuma-san?"

"AH, yes," she nodded firmly, returning to the present.

She'd ask the Mature Woman afterwards.

Kurenai Yuhi was looking at some baby clothes, when she suddenly felt a sharp drop in temperature around her.

She began to tremble.

**Author's notes**

…

**The classic Date.**

**Of departure.**


	66. Cinemaviewing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Six

Kurenai's right eyebrow twitched.

"So," she said quietly. "You have a friend, who was invited out by an older guy, who believed your friend was older, and she made no attempt to correct him, and now your friend needs help appearing mature for a date with said older guy?"

Naruko nodded.

"And you can't go to Shinku, because Shinku is a friend of said guy?"

She nodded again.

"So...to get it straight, someone's pinning for Kakashi?"

Naruko sputtered. "W-What!?"

"Shinku has a few male friends, but the bets are on Kakashi or Gai, and out of the two Kakashi's the most 'normal' one."

"Ehm..."

"Or maybe it's Umino-san, from the Academy?"

"No, it's..." Naruko bit her tongue. "So, anyway! What should I tell my friend?"

"Tell her not to lie about her age to him," Kurenai retorted. "If she's interested, and if he's interested, and if they are both Chuunin, then certainly they are able to keep their maturity with or without the age difference being so excessive."

"B-But what if he starts looking at her differently after that, and what if there's a reason she can't say her real age?"

"She isn't a minor or a civilian, is she?" Kurenai asked then, a hint of concern in her voice. "If she is, she should tell him, or you should tell him. It would be the proper thing to do, because he might risk a fine or heading off to jail if she keeps quiet about it and things take a more serious turn."

Naruko blushed red.

"Serious turn?" she squeaked out.

"Surely you had the talk, right?" Kurenai asked. "You know, the one on where Babies come from?" she patted gently the bulge in her stomach.

"Ah…ye-yes!" she stuttered out, nodding frantically.

"Good, but that's way down the road…so, your friend and Shinku's friend are going out for the first time, to a cinema?"

She nodded.

"Pretty bland, with little to talk about… I suppose the real problem is the before the film starts and the after…if he's grabby, then she should firmly but gently pinch his hand away."

"Grabby? Pinch hand?"

"One of the oldest tricks in the book is yawning, stretching, and putting the arm around the neck of the girl. If she accepts it, it's usually a means to realize she's fine with it. Or even simply sharing the same armchair's arm is another way a male tries to 'taste the waters'."

"I see," Naruko nodded. "And what next?"

"That's generally all there is, unless he offers her a dinner. In which case unless he's a perfect gentleman or she doesn't know him more she should refuse. A first date is usually just that, a date. Of course if she accepts then it generally does make it look like she's interested too."

She swallowed nervously. "So, if he offers dinner, the answer is no?"

"If you want to keep the distances and take it slowly, then yes," Kurenai nodded.

"It's just that…what if he no longer likes me because I said no?"

"I doubt anyone would hate someone else over this…" Kurenai smiled warmly, "So you set your eyes on someone then, Naruko? Oh just you wait until I tell Shinku…"

Naruko turned crimson.

"WHAT!? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU I NEVER SAI—"

"Hush," Kurenai chided her. "You just said so, really," the woman rolled her eyes. "It can't be Kakashi because he's your sensei, and he'd know your real age. Gai is excluded too, because they're friends. It can't be Umino-san, because he's a colleague of Shinku. Really, once you take them all out it can only be a civilian or a shinobi I don't know of."

"He's…" she choked and looked downwards. "Promise you won't say it to him?"

Kurenai raised an eyebrow, but gave a curt nod.

"It's Aniki."

She mumbled, looking like a wet kitten. "I…I just want to prove him wrong. I made a bet with Baa-chan about whether he'd find out it's me or not by the time…"

"Wait, so you _are_ Nazuma-sensei?" Kurenai retorted, clicking her tongue. "So that's why it felt familiar. He did ask me after all what would be a nice place for a d-"

"Wait, he asked you?" Naruko's eyes widened as they darted to stare at her accusingly. "_Why_ did he ask _you_?"

"I'm still his sister, thank you very much," Kurenai replied curtly. "And what you're doing is wrong, Naruko. I hope you know that."

Naruko fidgeted. "I just wanted to prove to him that I'm not a spoiled brat."

"By lying and acting on the whim of a bet? How do you think he'll take it when he finds out?"

"Oh no!" Naruko's eyes closed as she shook her head firmly. "No, no he won't find out."

"So what, you intend on going on a date and then drop the issue?"

"Well," she mumbled. "I just…" she fidgeted. "I'm just trying to be considered to Aniki. I'll tell him I'm not interested, and then everything will be fine…" she looked down, "That way he won't feel betrayed."

"Fine," Kurenai acquiesced. "Then, if you really want to act mature here is what you should do…"

Saturday arrived.

Shinku patiently stood in front of the cinema, fifteen minutes early. He gave another look at his wristwatch, and then sighed.

Five minutes later, and Nazuma-san arrived. She was early too, and was embarrassedly fidgeting as she held her hair tied in a braid that descended on the back of her hair. She wore a simple one-piece green dress, which further accentuated the red of her hair, and a nice little purse tied with a thin strap hung from her wrist.

Naruko knew Aniki would be wearing a casual Jacket and something underneath attire —really, he rarely dressed with something without pouches.

She just didn't expect him to look at her with a different air. It was like…not like when he usually smiled at her in the house or chuckled good-naturedly. It was, all together, a different attitude. A completely new and different air that made her heart skip a beat and that brought heat to her face.

He smiled gently and closed the distance.

"Is there any film in particular you would like to see? A few start in a couple of minutes, others in half an hour…"

"There's that romantic novel turned into film," she commented. The one where as 'Naruko' she had participated in and where she just hoped the director had remained true to his word. Because if he hadn't…she'd kill him.

"The one based on Icha-Icha 'Lovers in the Frost'?" her Aniki said then warily. "Of course," he nodded. "It starts in half an hour though…"

"Then we have all the time to get to know each other better," she replied calmly, "This is what this date is about, Shinku-san," she added quietly. "Know any good café nearby?"

"Yes, just a moment though…better to get the tickets now rather than afterwards," he waved at her as he entered the cinema quickly, before emerging five minutes later with them and placing them in his pocket.

"Haruno-san," Naruko clicked her tongue in displeasure and then mentally winced, holding her face schooled in the feature Kurenai had told her to use. "I wish to pay for my share. This is us going out as friends for the moment, understood?"

"Ah…" Shinku sighed. "Then, how about we go to the café and you offer me a coffee?"

"There is a clear difference in price however," she retorted. Ah! Kurenai had prepared for that too!

"Very well then," Shinku nodded sagely. "Then we will have to go out as friends one more time, and you will pay then, Nazuma-san."

"You are quite the pushy individual, Shinku-san," she replied, her eyes moving to the café they were currently entering. Really, it was so unfair! But then again, if she refused the dinner invitation then there would not be a second time.

She was sure of it!

It just meant breaking her Aniki's heart.

Of course, that thought froze her brain processes.

She was going to hurt her Aniki.

That…

That wasn't something she wanted to do. She didn't want to hurt him.

She didn't want to make him sad. She…

As he smiled and ordered two coffees, she found herself feeling horrible. Her hands twitched. She was just in time. If…if she just said something cropped up and she left, then…then everything would turn out fine. Or if she acted immaturely or something…she didn't know what to do precisely, but even then something clearly had to be done.

And why did Aniki have to keep up that extremely unfair smile?

How was she supposed to say no to him when he appeared genuinely happy about being there, with 'her'?

How could she break that happiness?

She shuddered slightly as another clone from the training dispersed.

She clenched her fists as she watched the cup of coffee arrive in front of her. It was just as she was about to bring the murky dark liquid to her mouth that her eyes opened in realization.

Naruko could not drink coffee.

Nazuma had no reason not to.

If she drank it, if she became some sort of hyperactive squirrel…then Aniki would certainly connect the dots. Even if he didn't, then he would know something was amiss.

It was as she stood there frozen in indecision, that someone slammed against her elbow and with a jolt forced the hot scorching coffee down her lap.

"Oh, excuse me!" a fake excuse shot out from the black-dressed Yakuza-like Hyuga, who then proceeded back to his corner.

As he did, he nodded to his colleagues.

All were wearing black suits, black bowler hats, and black sunglasses.

"Plan Alpha in execution, leader," one of them whispered into the small microphone tied to his wrist.

"Very well," Hinata commented from her position, "Men! Remember! This is not simply a battle, but a war! This is a war for love! LET THE FIRES OF LOVE BURN BRIGHTLY IN US ALL!"

Gai sneezed.

He always did when someone stole his catchphrase.

**Author's notes**

**Someone's going to die…**


	67. Kissing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Seven

She decided to keep the coffee stains hidden with a slight Henge.

Thankfully, Aniki did not ask how she had managed the feat, and thus they both headed off towards the cinema. She knew that whatever she said to Aniki now would later be important. If she managed to remain quiet, or not interesting enough, then everything would be fine.

She just had to let him down gently.

It couldn't be that difficult, right?

"It's really a nice day," he began, carefully vying towards the weather topic.

"Indeed, it is," she retorted evenly. They lapsed into silence again.

"Have you managed to get Konohamaru off your case?" he asked.

"Yes, I managed to," she replied. "I told him I had no interests in taking you away from his 'One-san'. What is it with the 'Oyabun' thing anyway?"

"Ah," Shinku averted his gaze, embarrassed. "My little sister calls me Aniki, Konohamaru idolizes her and so if I'm his 'one-san' Aniki, then that makes me the Oyabun."

"Have you ever thought about correcting them?" she replied scathingly. "Using a firm hand to resolve the issue once and for all would certainly work wonders."

The look of hurt on Aniki's face made her heart twist.

"I suppose so," he acquiesced, "But it's not like they're harming anyone by using those words…"

She didn't want to say it, but she had to.

"So, you're letting them do as they please? Flinging wooden kunai and rubber shuriken is one thing, but what when they escalate to something else? Putting your foot down and drawing a line would solve a lot of problems in the future," she retorted.

"Ah…once more, I suppose you're right, Nazuma-san," Shinku muttered. "I'll have a firm chat with them afterwards, to make sure they won't repeat it."

"You would need to do more than just chat with them. You're the older brother, right? Act like it then, tell them to cease and stop acting like mad people." She pressed on. "Or maybe you enjoy all that attention, uh?"

She was snapping at her Aniki. Her tongue felt filled with ashes as she watched his mood drop further.

"It's…It's not like that, I just…I don't see a problem with—"

"Oh, of course, a bunch of girls vying for your attention and you don't see a problem with it. Typical chauvinistic," she knew that word! She knew that word's meaning, "Male right? Do you know two more girls tried subtly to intimidate me while I was teaching? And of course, this is all because you can't apparently put down your foot on the matter."

"I'm sorry if my sister or—"

"I don't want your excuses, Shinku-san," she replied frostily. "I want you to understand that the way you act is simply going to hurt them all in the long run. You should be clear and to the point," she added then. She sighed afterwards, her eyes looking at Shinku's downcast expression —as if he were a kicked puppy. "Look, I'm not trying to be spiteful…I'm sure you were just acting out in a way not to hurt their feelings but, in the end, you will just worsen the situation if you keep this up."

Shinku made a small bitter smile as he nodded. "Yeah, I suppose so…"

Then they entered the cinema, with Shinku handing over the tickets to the man at the entrance —a black dressed, sunglass wearing man— who ushered them in.

There were just a few spots left, but the two seats that should have been side by side…weren't.

Shinku checked the tickets once more.

"They gave us separate seats?" he muttered in surprise. "I thought I had asked for one next to the other," he agonizingly looked back towards the exit of the hall, only to find the door closed and the film about to begin.

The rest of the cinema was occupied by the Hyuga-family outing of Branch members.

Apparently, that day was the day they randomly occupied a single cinema to watch films with their crying babies.

Even if the babies had sunglasses on though…which made him wonder how the hell they could watch a movie like that.

"Well," Naruko said, suddenly feeling bitter about this, "What is the number of the seat closest to the screen?"

"It's that one, but…"

Nazuma grabbed him by the sleeve, and then after bringing him right to the spot —between two burly looking Hyuga, she made him sit down there…

Before sitting on his lap and dropping her head backwards.

"There," she commented calmly, a grin on her face as she heard the entire Hyuga-Branch swallow their spits by the shock. "This way we can both watch the film," she whispered in a low voice, "I'm not heavy, am I?"

"No," Shinku whispered back, slightly nervous. "You aren't."

Naruko inwardly smiled as she gently relaxed against her Aniki's shoulder. She was practically cheek to cheek with him though, which meant she'd just have to turn her head to the side for but an instant, and then she'd be kissing him.

That was, of course, if she wanted to.

"Naruko-chan, please, do not sacrifice yourself for me!" Princess Gale yelled from the screen.

"I must!" her 'other-self' appeared on screen, and instinctively she looked towards her Aniki's face. He was slack jawed. AH! He hadn't believed her, had he!?

"Princess, please escape with your beloved subordinate and live happily! I will sacrifice myself to buy you time!" then the 'Naruko' on the screen turned and headed towards the door of the Daimyo's palace. "I know what it means to love someone, and yet to never be able to hold him in your arms and say those words," she said softly.

Nazuma had a bad feeling. She had made the director _**swear**_ to cut that scene out. He wouldn't have _**dared**_ to put it in, would he!?

"You too love someone, Naruko-chan?" Princess Gale said softly.

"Yes," Naruko-on-the-screen acquiesced. "But it is forbidden, and thus I could not let my love bloom…"

Oh he had dared. The bastard had dared. _She was going to __**kill**__ that son-of-a-bit—_

"What man captured your maiden's heart, Naruko-chan? Please answer me!"

"It is…"

"Achuu!" the Hyuga to her left sneezed loudly, slamming his elbow against her side and sending her to tumble forward, just as Shinku was turning around because of the sudden noise.

There was a 'chuu' sound.

Lips interlocked.

And Naruko-from-the-screen said crisply, as if someone had brought the volume up to the maximum possible output —as if someone was being menaced from the camera room by a Hyuga-Juuken strike of balls dropping if he didn't bring the volume to the max.

"My brother!"

**Author's notes**

…**Hyuga should stop interfering.**

**I began to laugh like an imbecile at imagining the scene of the 'Achuu', because literally over a dozen of Harem-like animes have the same 'mistake-kiss' scene.**

**So I'm laughing. Ahahaha.**


	68. Angering

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Eight

Aniki's lips were rough, but pleasant to the taste, if she had to say it. They tasted slightly of the coffee drank before, and as she analysed their taste she found herself finally realizing the situation.

She was kissing her Aniki.

He was kissing her.

This…she stumbled back with a 'kyah' sound and turned extremely red, as she nearly tumbled on the ground had Shinku not held her.

"Ah…" she meekly whispered, bringing her right hand to her lips. "It was my first kiss," she muttered, looking downcast.

"I-I'm sorry!" Shinku spluttered out, earning a sharp 'sh!' from the Hyuga next to him.

"No, no," she shook her head warily. "It was a mistake," she whispered. She had to act mature. She clenched her right hand tightly. "I just wanted my first time to be special…but…"

"Sh!" another Hyuga hissed.

"Oh, enough is enough," Shinku muttered, standing up and grabbing Nazuma-san's hand. "Let's get out of here."

The moment they stepped outside and headed towards the park, Naruko kept her head low and her hand clenched tightly around her Aniki's own. He was bringing her around as he did when she was young —albeit, of course, this was Nazuma being brought around and not Naruko. His look filled with concern, he settled her down on a nearby bench.

"Do you want something to drink? Coffee? Tea?" he asked her slowly.

"Shinku-san, I'm not angry at you," she whispered then, bringing her eyes up to meet the hurt look in her brother's face. Why did he have to take it personally? It wasn't his fault. It was hers for going along with such a stupid bet with Tsunade, and it was hers anyway for keeping up the lie.

"Still, I'll get you something. It's still too early for dinner, and ending the date like this would just feel wrong…please let me apologize somehow?"

As he pleaded her, she found herself uncomfortable. She knew what she could say to cut everything out in a single, clean snap…but if she said that, then her Aniki would probably be devastated. She couldn't just leave and end it like that. She had to end it in a friendly but not overly so tone.

"Then…cold tea?"

"I'll be back immediately," and with that, he dashed off towards the machines at the corner of the park. She sighed as she extended her legs for a moment, before dropping her back against the bench. It was the same bench where she had seen her Aniki for the first time.

A bitter smile etched on her lips.

She still remembered that time.

It was the first day she had gone to the park, and she had played a lot with everyone else. The boring boy on the bench hadn't even interested her until later, when everyone else had left and he had still been there, like her.

Well, she had no parents who'd come to take her, and the orphanage didn't much care if you returned at six or at seven, as long as you were in at eight for the curfew. He had been there, reading. She had decided to nag at him on a whim, and had ended up reading.

The next day, the kids had pushed her out of their games, ignored her, or called her a monster.

She hadn't known why they had become so mean, but when she had neared the boy on the bench, he hadn't said a bad word and had been _concerned_ for her. She had latched on to him like a vine, and he had never stopped being there.

"Ehi, cutie," a fake-thug-actually-Hyuga-Branch-Member said with a fake-sneer, "You want to go somewhere with me?"

The other fake-thug sneered too, keeping an eye out with his sunglasses still on his face.

"No thanks," she replied curtly, "I'm waiting for my friend."

"Is your friend as cute as you?"

"My _boy_-friend," she added then, heat rising to her cheeks as she looked sideways. She meant it as a 'male' friend of course, not as an actual boyfriend. Damn it, why did she have to think about it!?

"Aw, come on, drop that loser and get out with a real macho," the first thug said showing his right arm and flexing his muscles. "You know I'm a Jounin, hot-shot?"

"Who taught you to flirt, your mother?"

"My MOM IS THE BEST MOM EVER!" the man actually shrieked back in tears. "DON'T YOU DARE OFFEND MY MOMMY!"

"Now, now, you made him cry! Are you happy about this?" the second thug said, patting the back of the first crying Hyuga. "You're a heartless bitch! Come on Frankie, let's get you out of here. We'll find someone else to flirt with…"

"Sniffle, but she insulted my mom!"

"Now, now," the second thug said smoothly, "Everything's going to be fine…"

They began to leave just as Shinku arrived back with his breath short and in a hurry, sweating slightly as he held two cans of cold tea in his hands.

"Is everything all right?" he whispered to her, as he began to hand over the cold tea to Nazuma, who took it with both hands while showing a perplexed gaze.

"I don't know actually…"

"Hey you," five more thugs appeared a moment later, "That bitch over there offended Frankie's mom. That's something you don't do, you understand bro?" they circled around them as Shinku froze in shock.

"So how about you leave the bitch here and—"

"I'm sure it's all a misunderstanding," Shinku said, walking closer to the thug in question —yet another sunglass wearing fake-Yakuza Hyuga. "We can solve this without using violence."

"Listen here, civilian," the Yakuza pushed his index straight against Shinku's shoulder, making him wince from the pressure applied. "This is a shinobi matter, and it's a mom-issue, so get the hell out of here."

"I'm afraid I can't do that," Shinku replied. "I'm sure it was a misun—"

The next moment, the Hyuga found himself face first on the ground as Nazuma stood growling on top of his back, holding his arm behind him and threatening out.

"_Go. Away._"

There was a 'crack', a yelp, and in the end, a brawl broke out.

"Remember! No Russi-ahem, no Juken!" a group of dark thugs in the alley nearby said, before charging in. They didn't know why they had to fight the girl one at the time while circling her and menacingly jump from one leg to the other, but they obeyed the script laid forth by their own Oyabun…so cinematic battle they would fight!

"Yah! Ha! Oh! Yeahy!"

"What the hell?" Nazuma exclaimed as one of the thugs began to move his arms around strangely. "I…I don't even want to know what that was."

"Nazuma-san," Shinku whispered, "What did you do?"

"Nothing! Some guys tried to flirt with me and I said no, because I was waiting for you and now…there's this…and…" she was on the verge of tears, "This date is horrible…"

There, she had said it.

Aniki didn't do much more than wince, but she knew she had just killed him inside. Still, it was the right thing to do, wasn't it?

"Can we leave with a Shunshin or something?"

She blinked, then grabbed him and disappeared in a flicker.

The thugs frowned.

"What does the script say?" one whispered to another.

"It says that she should have fought and brawled to show her 'not-lady' side, so that she'd be seen as another hoodlum by Aniki-san," another thug remarked, taking out a parchment. "Are we missing something?"

"Are you sure it said 'No Russian' on that bit?"

"It's 'No Byakugan', imbecile! What the hell is 'Russian' to begin with!?"

"So, we lost them? Wonderful…who's going to report it to the boss?"

To that question, none of the thugs dared to answer.

Meanwhile, Naruko would have kicked herself in the head. She had gone to the only place she automatically associated with safety, and that meant…

They were in front of Aniki's house.

Aniki was many things.

He was many things…but he was not stupid.

"How do you know where I live, Nazuma-san?"

"Teachers share their addresses and contact information," she deadpanned back.

And she wasn't stupid either.

Shinku sighed in relief, before shaking his head slowly. "Really…would you like to come in for tea?"

Her eyes widened as she realized she was missing her cold can of tea —she had left it behind at the park! Damn those fake-thugs! She'd have a few choice words with Hinata afterwards, oh if she would!

"Will it be only tea?" she asked then, her eyes narrowed and accusatory.

"O-Of course!" Shinku sputtered, "My sister should be coming back home soon too, if you'd like we could have dinner…after the disaster we just went through, I feel like I need to be forgiven for it."

"And what if I couldn't care less and wanted to leave? Uh?"

No, no, she wasn't supposed to be saying it with that tone. Now her Aniki looked even more hurt than before.

"I…I swear I'll make it up to you, Nazuma-san. Really! I'm sure there will be nothing strange…" he opened the door of his house.

"ONII-SAMA! I WANT YOUR SPERM!"

And promptly froze as Sakura stood there with a glass jar in one hand and a sexy nurse outfit on.

"Forget it," Nazuma sneered. "This date was frankly the most horrible I ever went to, and you're nothing more than a pervert," she turned, giving her back to him. "Don't you dare talk to me ever again."

Then she left. She didn't know why she had said that. She didn't know why she had been angry at that. She had just wanted to spend some time talking to Aniki as a normal person, not as Naruko or with Sakura or Hinata acting up like that. Yet she hadn't managed to.

She had been stopped, harassed, and constantly forced into…into…she was in tears as she dropped her henge in a dark alley, before changing out of her 'date' clothes with the prepared rucksack she had hidden on a nearby rooftop.

When she next descended and came walking in, she smiled. Sure, her heart was bleeding and she was pretty sure her Aniki would be devastated, but eventually he'd be fine and…

The sound of a slap froze her on her tracks.

"Leave. Don't you ever show yourself in front of me again, Sakura. _I don't want to see you ever again_."

Then there was the slam of the front door.

Sakura stood trembling outside, her right cheek swollen and her eyes wide and teary.

Naruko swallowed.

She had always wondered why her Aniki had never been angry. She had never seen him angry.

She had never known him angry.

She had never, ever, believed he could get angry —even though she had tried.

So now…

Now he was angry.

Sakura dashed away in tears, leaving her at the front door. She couldn't help it, really.

She…

She turned around and left for the ramen shop. She'd give her Aniki a few hours to calm down, and then she'd come back.

By then everything would be back to normal, yeah…

A couple of hours, only a couple of hours…

Then everything would be fine again.

_Dattebayo_.

**Author's notes**

**Did I manage a 'sad' Dattebayo now?**

**Of course the punch-line (slap-line) was Sakura…well, she succeeded.**


	69. Unforgiving

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Sixty-Nine

When she returned, two hours later and a stomach full of ramen, she entered the house expecting her Aniki somewhere in the kitchen, ready to scold her for having snacked elsewhere.

Her Aniki wasn't in the kitchen.

She frowned, before starting to creep up the stairs all the way to his room. She pressed her ear against it, but when she heard nothing, she opened it by an inch.

The room was empty.

She returned down in the kitchen, before finally stumbling upon a note on the table's surface, which she had missed.

"_Gone out, date went badly, have to apologize."_

She swallowed nervously.

Where had he gone to apologize? It wasn't as if Nazuma had…a…house…

She paled.

The teachers' contact, the Godaime had filled it with an empty apartment building, since it wouldn't be for more than one month, or at least that had been the bet's ultimate threshold and…

If that was the case, then…

She dashed out in a hurry, jumping from rooftop to rooftop until she reached the one of the abandoned building in question. She barely landed, going through the hand seal for the Henge —maybe she'd make it on time, maybe she'd find an excuse— when a voice came right from behind her.

"Naru—" and then the Henge finished, and Naruko would have rather died on the spot than turned around.

But she did turn around. She turned, and she stared with the eyes of Nazuma at her Aniki, who was looking at her with shock etched on his face. "Ah…I…"

Shinku just fell down on the ground, sitting down with his shoulders trembling and his face downcast.

"I thought I'd get here and well…kidnap her," she blurted out lamely, trying for an excuse.

"She's not here," Shinku mumbled. "The building's abandoned. She lied about her address on the teachers' contact information. That's not something you can do, because the Hokage checks them scrupulously. So I went down to T&I, since I'm quite the habitual visit. They never heard of a Nazuma before, and normally the teachers are checked before being hired because of what happened with Mizuki years ago…" he chuckled bitterly.

"Aniki…"

"And so I returned here, because I thought to myself the only possible explanation was that something wasn't right with the entire ordeal. Let's face it, I'm a magnet for trouble rather than for women, and no normal or sane individual would ever like me. So, in the end, I thought at who could do something like this. Hinata, Sakura, they all had a part but I never once suspected you. I thought it some sort of revenge from Hiashi, or maybe a maddening trick of Anko. I actually believed for a moment it might have been Shizune…"

Then his eyes locked on hers. "But I would have never believed you to be the culprit."

"I'm not!" she exclaimed. "I didn't do this to hurt you Aniki! I swear! I just made a bet with Baa-chan! If I could master the rasengan with the wind element before you found me out at the academy, she'd keep Shizune off your back!"

"So you made a bet involving me," he muttered, his voice cracked. "Really? The date and everything else was part of a bet?"

"No! No, I swear, it wasn't like that! I swear I didn't…it was them! They did everything! I didn't do anything about that! I wasn't…"

"Why?" he asked then, his voice a mere whisper, "Why?" he repeated.

Naruko hung her head down in shame.

"I'm not a kid," she mumbled. "You always treat me like one, but I'm not. I'm an adult now, Aniki! I'm no longer a girl, but a woman! And…and I wanted to prove it to you," she croaked out. Her heart drummed hard as she spoke those words, her eyes tearing up as she clenched her hands against her chest. "Please…I didn't mean to…"

"I trusted you, out of everyone, not to do something like this," he whispered back, his eyes holding on to a sad glint. "And you trampled on my trust, Naruko. I trusted you, I believed in you, and you didn't even bother with thinking about how I'd feel afterwards, would you? Of course not, you don't think half of the time."

She winced at the words, the bitter words, but still opened her mouth to…

"Shut up," Shinku hissed out. "I don't want to hear your excuses. What is there to say? Was this all another great plan to see me angry for once? Was this enjoyable? Well, get a fucking view Naruko, because now I am angry!" he brought both arms up as he yelled, scaring her out of her wits as he did so.

She was scared. She simply couldn't comprehend nor connect the Aniki to the Shinku she was watching now. One always smiled, and had a kind face. His red eyes were always gentle, and he laughed. This one had furious crimson eyes and a dark snarl on his visage, and his breathing was ragged as angry words spewed out of his mouth.

They couldn't be the same person…but they were, and it was her fault.

"You betrayed my trust," he choked out, "You lied to me, repeatedly. After everything I did for you, after everything I went through for you, after everything I understood, after every single thing I accepted…this, only this…was it that hard not to do it?" his voice cracked, as he shook his head.

"I don't care anymore. For once, I thought I had found a normal woman, someone who wasn't trying to get in my pants or who had violent tendencies. For once, I believed I had found someone I could love without the risk of being turned into a pincushion or being the centre of obsessive-behaviour. For once…I thought it would be nice to have a normal family." He chuckled bitterly.

"Then again, there isn't a single ninja with a head on their shoulder, is there? Prancing around, doing as you please…I've had enough."

He turned, and began to walk towards the door of the rooftop. "I'll leave you the house keys on the table. I'll be gone by tomorrow. Find someone else to prank, Naruko, find someone else to torture their hearts out. With me…you're done."

And with that he left.

Naruko slumped down on the floor of the rooftop, her eyes glassy as she stared up at the sky.

It couldn't get any worse, could it?

The next day, Team Ten would report back the death of Asuma Sarutobi.

The next day, Naruko went home to an empty house.

The pain she felt in her chest…was _indescribable_.

**Author's notes**

**Ah…do you smell the fresh angst?**

**Of course, Shinku dies next and the angst reaches a new level.**

**Just joking. This is more of Drama I suppose. Everything will turn out fine, of course, and then more people will die.**

**DEATHS FOR ALL!**

**(Ps: I did say someone was going to die soon…XD it was Asuma.)**


	70. Dooropening

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy

Kakashi stared at his team, or what remained of it.

Sakura was on the ground, her cheeks gaunt and her eyes glazed over as if someone had just killed her family.

Sai remained normally apathetic.

Naruko was...well, it was scary.

Her cheeks were sunken. Her eyes were dead. She wasn't sprawled on the ground, but her bed raggled hair and her clear lack of vitality made it clear something had happened.

This was supposed to be a team training exercise.

It turned out to be anything but such as Naruko didn't even move from her position when he gave the start.

He tried to fling a punch at Naruko's face, but the girl...she didn't even react.

He stilled an inch before touching her nose, and then stopped the practice.

"Alright," he said clapping his hands. "What is going on here?"

Naruko didn't reply.

Sakura began to wail. Sai frowned and cocked his head to the side, before taking 'Teen Ninja Today!' with the front page stating, in bold green letters 'Sexy Swimsuit Photo of Maito Gai, the Sexiest Green Macho of Konoha! Look at those abs, they're one-hundred _percent_ Fire of Youth!'

"They're pregnant," he blurted out in the end, his tone completely serious.

Kakashi face-planted himself in the ground, his legs twitching.

Sakura didn't punch him.

Naruko didn't say a word.

When no answer came forth, Sai dropped the Teenager magazine and took out another one.

'Youthful Konoha!' with the underlining bold of 'Let us rock all night long, young Ninjas! How to party hard and be a model shinobi the next day! One hundred and one tips to drunk-missions!'

"Ah," Sai acquiesced, nodding. "Now I know," he crisply closed the magazine.

"What, Sai?" Kakashi asked.

"They're on their period."

This time, twin fists slammed into his face, as both Sakura and Naruko had passed their patience's fuse.

"IT'S NOT LIKE THAT!" they both screamed, as Sai flew in the air and disappeared in a twinkle in the sky.

"Mental note," Kakashi stated. "Give Sai an Icha-Icha for his unorthodox technique."

"Pervert," Sakura mumbled. "You don't know the pain of a love torn to shreds…Onii-sama doesn't want to see me anymore!" she sniffled. "He slapped me!"

Naruko remained quiet, looking sideways.

"I'm just an idiot," she whispered quietly. "A stupid, stupid idiot," she added then, before exhaling. "I can't train today, Kakashi-sensei…sorry," gloomily, she disappeared in a flicker before Kakashi could stop her.

"Why do I have the feeling Shinku is involved also with her mood?" Kakashi exhaled.

Naruko dashed back home. She opened the door, kicking her sandals off and running in the kitchen. She quietly watched the silent room, before shaking her head and stumbling upstairs, to where Shinku's room was.

It was empty.

No personal belongings remained.

She shook her head more firmly, before looking in the bathroom, in the office, in the library, in the small corridor and the small room beneath the stairs.

She looked on the rooftop, throughout the entire second floor, and then finally fell down on her knees with her hands against the wooden floor.

The light filtered in from the window, the birds chirped…

But the house was empty, without an inkling of doubt.

No stirring, no frying, no noises of footsteps…nothing.

Her Aniki simply wasn't there, and that more than anything was what made her curl up in the corner of the hallway, pressing her face against her knees and staying there, silently. It reminded her so much of the loneliness she felt when she had to return to the orphanage, or when she began living alone.

No one cared back then, if it weren't for Aniki, no one would have cared for a long time.

Someone knocked at the door, and with a blur and a burst of speed, she went to open it. Maybe her Aniki had come back? The door opened, and her mood dropped completely down.

Shikamaru was on the other side, and he looked as downcast as she was.

"Asuma-sensei died," he said slowly. Her eyes widened. "The funeral is tomorrow."

Asuma was Kurenai's husband, and…her eyes watered before nodding. She didn't know a lot about the man, but he had helped her with the wind technique.

"I…I'm sorry for your loss," she croaked out. Shikamaru nodded numbly, and turning, began to leave.

He stilled halfway through and gave her one last look. "You know, I don't know what happened…but your brother is over at Kurenai's place."

Naruko clenched her fists, averting her gaze.

"You should make peace. You never know when something might happen," he said then. "And I'm sure he felt awful too."

Naruko grimaced, before nodding.

"Troublesome women," Shikamaru grumbled to himself, before leaving.

Naruko returned inside, closing the door and then slipping on the ground once more. Her entire frame began to tremble once more. She felt her eyes sting as tears fell down her cheeks.

Then both of her hands went to slap her cheeks, and she nodded to herself.

"No use crying," she grumbled, standing up. "Let's get over to Aniki. And if he won't forgive me, then I'll just keep on trying and trying dattebayo!" she exclaimed, fist pumping. "Even if I have to spend one week on my knees, I'll get him to forgive me!"

Then she dashed off.

Shinku Yuhi was not having a good day. Still, he pressed his own thoughts in the back of his mind and let them disappear in front of bigger problems. He always was good at hiding stuff from others whenever it bothered him. Smiling, going along, and taking care to keep one's own opinion secret. Those sorts of things were what had helped him remain sane.

Now here he was, trying to convince his over-emotional, overly pregnant and widow sister to eat something.

It wasn't working, but at least she had stopped crying after last night. She was still prone to tears whenever something reminded her of Asuma, but he supposed she had finished the tears, considering how red her eyes were.

"I'll take care of the visitors…if you want to rest…" he hazarded, seeing how the rice balls weren't even being touched.

"Thank you," Kurenai whispered politely. "But I'm a…a Jounin…and…I can take…sniffle…"

"And I'm the beautiful and dashing younger brother, who is lethal with a frying pan," he replied gently, "Come on now, off to bed. I promise I won't burn the house down…"

"But I should receive the condolence…condolences…cond…properl…" she began to cry again, and thus he ended up hugging her.

"Shh…shh…it's…I'm here…" he muttered, holding her gently. "And when the kid comes around, he'll need an awesome uncle worthy of the title."

Kurenai said nothing, simply finishing her tears once more before muttering back. "You should…you know…talk with Naruko."

This time it was his turn to look sideways.

"She didn't mean anything bad with it," Kurenai whispered. "You know she doesn't have an evil bone in her to begin with…she just wanted to…"

"I'm sure," he exhaled, "But…it still hurts." He closed his eyes and grimaced. "You go to bed and I'll take care of the visitors. Proper or not, you need to sleep. If not for you, do it for the baby at least."

She gave a meek nod, and then wobbled upstairs.

He was just about to start cleaning the table of the kitchen, when a set of knocks frantically reached his ears from the door.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," he sighed.

Then he opened the door.

In retrospect, he should have known not to open it without asking who it was.

He found himself on the floor the next moment after all…

**Author's notes**

**Cliff-Hanger.**

**That said, since it's chapter 70 I suppose I should forewarn you all that this story will end with the Post-Pain battle. I'm not going to do the 'War' stuff because let's face it, Shinku wouldn't simply have any screen time and it's better that way. **


	71. Sorrying

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-One

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry…Please, I'm sorry," the whimpers and the tears kept on falling with every repetition of the word, as Naruko had him pinned down on the ground and was tightening her grip on his sides. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"Agh…you're hurting me, Naruko," he hissed back.

Naruko tightened the grip even more. "I'm sorry!"

"Argh…ah…" he exhaled, looking upwards. "Last time I open the door without checking."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Naruko repeated, holding on to him as if he were some sort of rock against an incoming hurricane. He doubted a hurricane could detach her to begin with.

"Naruko, let go."

"No," she retorted, shifting her grip to stare at him with her cerulean and tear-filled eyes. "I'm sorry."

"I got that the first fifteen times," Shinku deadpanned. "Now you can let go."

"No," she shook her head firmly. "Until I'm forgiven, I'm not letting you go Aniki."

"Where is my bodyguard when I need her…" he grumbled.

"I knocked her out," Naruko replied bashfully. "But I'm not letting you go!" she added then, "She'll have to pry you off my dead fingers, Aniki!"

She then bit her lips and lowered her head against his chest. "I'm sorry. Really. I am…I was stupid. I know. I'll…I'll go a week without ramen, a month, a year…I'll stop eating it forever…"

Teuchi was minding his business, when he felt a frosty breeze blow down his neck.

"I'll be a good girl. I promise I won't try to ground Konohamaru's nuts to paste for what he usually does of perverted."

Konohamaru suddenly breathed in relief.

"I won't secretly fill with scratching powder the Hyugas' underwear."

The entire branch family was scratching away –something that kept people away from the compound, because scratching crotches where never fun things to let their kids watch.

"I'll do the housework, the homework, the whatever-work and I'll be the perfect little sister, but please, please, please I'm sorry so please…forgive me?"

"You trampled on my trust," he replied.

"I'm sorry! I'm really sorry! I didn't want it to end like that! I just didn't want to keep on lying to you! I wanted you to be happy, and you were happy!" she closed her eyes and pressed her face against Shinku's chest. "I'm sorry Nazuma-san was just a lie, Aniki…I'm sorry I lied to you, I'm sorry…please…"

He exhaled.

He brought his right hand up and Naruko flinched, closing her eyes and holding still.

He patted her on the head.

"This is the only time, Naruko, I will forgive you for something like this," he whispered. "Do this again, and I swear I will never talk to you again."

Her eyes shone as she sniffled, before sobbingly hugging Shinku as tightly as she could. He patted her head slowly, sighing and rolling his eyes. He was too soft.

It probably was the situation –he couldn't make a scene with Kurenai pregnant now, could he? And it was better this way.

It wasn't as if Nazuma had…

"Wait," he blinked. "So…I kissed you?"

Naruko froze.

"Ah…"

"And you talked to me acting all high and mighty, while you were the one lying all along?"

"Ehm…"

"You know that, when Sakura and Hinata hear of this, they'll be over y—"

"Can we keep it a secret!?" she squeaked, "Only the two of us? Please?"

"If Tsunade pulled you in a bet, she'll probably tell Sakura in the end," Shinku replied. He frowned. "Are you going to let me up now?"

Sheepishly, Naruko averted her gaze…and then remained down there. "I missed you."

"I wasn't 'gone' anywhere."

"You could have been," Naruko pouted. "You could have not forgiven me."

"And then you would have insisted nightmarishly for months, right?"

"Ehehe…'ttebayo."

"Really," Shinku chuckled. "Ah…so maybe it's true? Are you a…what's the term, a bro-con? You did state quite plainly in the film that—"

Naruko turned red.

"N-no! It was a line of the film! Really!" she pushed her face further down on Shinku's chest, nuzzling it. "I knew I shouldn't have gone to see the film! But the director said he had removed that scene! The bastard!" she grumbled. "I knew people would misunderstand…" she muttered, "I…I mean, it's not that I don't lo-love you, Aniki! But th-this and th-that are different!"

As she stuttered, Shinku just kept a smile on his face. "All right. Now can you finally let me go, Naruko?"

Blushing fiercely, Naruko did just that standing to the side and helping him up. She then hugged him once more, and breathed in deeply.

"I'm sorry, Aniki."

"I got that the first time, troublesome Imouto of mine."

"So, when are you coming back?" she asked with her eyes sparkling.

"Ah…right now, I need to take care of Kurenai," his voice grew grim as he grimaced. "There's the funeral to organize and she's pregnant, so at least for a little bit I'll stay here to check on her."

Naruko's look went downcast, until she suddenly perked up. "Then, I'll help too!"

And with that, Kurenai found herself chilled to the very bones.

Naruko, on the other hand, was once more in her seventh heaven.

That lasted until the Hokage showed her the bill.

Then, she just swallowed and pointed out she already knew how to complete the Rasengan since the second day of training.

Naruko found out for the first time what it meant to be fist-flung out of the window by Tsunade them.

"YOU STUPID BRAT! I DRANK DOUBLE THIS WEEK PURPOSEFULLY FOR THIS!"

Kakashi good naturedly chuckled as the screams of 'Baa-chan! Stop!' echoed in the air.

Sakura, on the other hand, was holding a nice friendly chat with Hinata, while holding dead emerald eyes and a twitching smile.

"So…Naruko…kissed…Onii-sama…and…and…"

"And they were last seen hugging each other tenderly on the floor of Kurenai-sensei's apartment."

Sakura stood up, and left twitching a kunai in her right hand and muttering foul curses.

Hinata simply drank her tea.

Mr. Fluff took that as a cue to appear and meow, only for Hinata to shoot him an angry look. "I'm not acting like an evil villain! I'm a demurred and controlled princess!"

"Meow…" 'Really?'

"Is that sarcasm? I can have you neutered, you know…"

"Meow!" 'Nevermind!' and with that the cat run.

Hinata returned to sipping her tea.

Like the demurred and kind-hearted princess she was, who would soon help her beloved Prince from the claws of the evil Yandere.

And everything would be right in the world once more.

**Author's notes**

**Fluff is back. Back Again. Fluff is back. For the win.**

**Now everybody, just follow me **

**cause we need a little, Yandery.**

**Jostanos was right in one of his omake. Well done Jostanos!**


	72. Yanderismhealing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Two

Naruko wasn't clingy. She was now Octopus-like clingy. Like a somewhat overly excited dog, she always dashed towards him for a tackling hug, a pat on the head or a general 'you did well with the house chores' compliment. She would then smile and, Shinku imagined, wagged her imaginary tail with her ears perked up in glee.

Yes, for some sort of twisted reason, he was imagining Naruko as a Dog-Girl. He hummed thoughtfully as the door rang once more. This time he checked from the spyglass, before sighing and heading back to the kitchen.

"Who is it?" Naruko asked, appearing with a white apron and a scarf over her head —she had been cleaning the attic while he cooked.

"A door to door seller," he replied awkwardly. Naruko didn't buy it and went herself.

A second later, the door swung open. "Oh! Hello Sakura! How are…"

"Where is Onii-sama?" Sakura's voice was cold.

"Uh? Aniki is in the kitchen! Right, listen, I know he's angry at you and all but I'm sure he'll forgive you if…"

"Naruko? Shut up," Sakura's voice came harshly. "I know what you did."

"Y-You know?"

Shinku had a bad feeling about this.

"You kissed my Onii-sama, Naruko," Sakura snarled. "You," he heard sound of scuffling as Naruko's back hit the wall. "Kissed my Onii-sama!"

Then there was a wet-like sound.

"Gah! Sakura! What the hell is wrong with you!?"

"I took it back," Sakura snarled. "Onii-sama belongs to me! He is mine, Naruko! Mine! You don't know what it was like, going back home every day with the fear of not being able to mould chakra! Do you know how my brother was treated back then!? I know! I was there! He's my brother more than he will ever be yours! He always covered for me when I made mistakes, mother always punished him rather than me, and so that's why I became the first of the class! I had to be perfect, get the perfect scores, be the perfect and first Kunoichi, or my failures would become his burdens!"

Sakura sobbed. "At least as long as mother was happy he was fine…and then he left me. He stopped being my brother, and he became yours. Do you know what it feels like to try your hardest and then to be dropped on the ground as a used toy? I did everything I could! I tried everything! And then I realized that if I couldn't have him, then just a piece of him would be fine all the same!"

Shinku swallowed.

"I'm not lying, I'm not delusional! I love my brother! I love him with every inch of my being! I don't just want his babies, but I'll settle for that if I can't have his love!" with that, there was another noise of scuffle, and Naruko yelped. "You took him away from me, bit by bit, but I thought you a friend and I let go. Now, however…I see that all along you just wanted him for yourself!"

"That's not true! I…"

"You're like a Cuckoo, Naruko. You lay your eggs in the nests of other birds, and when your children are born, they push the eggs of the other chicks out, to fall on the ground. You're a…"

"Enough," Shinku took a step forward, emerging from the kitchen.

"Enough? No, this isn't enough Onii-sama," Sakura hissed, and now that Shinku could see her, he understood what the problem was about. She had a kunai firmly placed to the neck of Naruko, "This will never be enough. So," she smiled, "How are you doing, Onii-sama?"

"Listen, Sakura," he muttered bringing his hands up. "You don't want to do this."

"A world without Onii-sama isn't a world worth living in," Sakura retorted.

"If you drop the Kunai and stop it this instant, I'll forgive you," he hazarded. "And I swear nothing else will happen?"

"Pinkie promise?" Sakura said half-childishly.

"Pinkie promise," he nodded slowly. Sakura dropped the kunai in less than a split second, before blurring and tackling him in his midsection. He exhaled from the strength of the blow, but held his ground. Naruko palmed the kunai that Sakura had dropped, staring at the pink-haired girl wide-eyed.

"Onii-samaaa," Sakura wailed slowly as he sighed, and began to pat her hair. "Onii-samaaaa…"

"Shhh, shhh," he whispered back. "I'm sorry I slapped you…" he whispered, his gaze eying Naruko with a mixture of worry —mostly for Sakura— and apprehension.

Naruko just grimaced and shook her head, letting it be.

"Neh, Onii-sama?" Sakura said suddenly, turning his attention downwards to her.

"Ye—umphf!"

The lips tasted of cherry. The tongue invaded _**excessively**_ far for his tastes. Her grip was of steel as she roughly raped his mouth with hers.

That lasted until Naruko overcame her shock and ripped her apart from him. He gagged and breathed in, bringing a hand to his mouth as Sakura just smiled pleasantly, her mind lost in her own day-dreams.

"Now, Naruko-chan, we're even," she giggled. "I kissed Onii-samaa…ah…" she dreamily sighed. "The race is on now, Naruko!" she declared, pointing a finger towards her and making the blonde stutter. "I will have Onii-sama's babies first!"

"What!? No! The hell you will!"

"And who will stop me? Uh?"

"I…I will!" Naruko exclaimed, pointing a thumb to herself. "Aniki won't fall for a flat chested girl like you!"

"Tramp!" Sakura snapped back.

"Plank board!"

"Fattie!"

"These are breasts! The things you'll never have!"

"I have hips, thank you very much," she smacked her rear. "And my hair is pink, Aniki's eyes are red. We match!"

"That's…that's stupid!" Naruko blurted out. "Argh…My eyes are blue, and blue and red makes purple which…is…" lamely, she sighed, "A nice colour?"

"If you two are done squabbling in my entrance," Kurenai commented from the upper floor with a slight smile on her face —she was probably amused by it all— "I think you'll have to add another seat for dinner tonight."

"Oh! Oh! Yuhi-san!" Sakura blurred ahead to stop in front of her, "Older Honourable Sister! Bless my relationship with Shinku-Oniisama please!"

"Ehm…"

"Sakura," Shinku's eyes narrowed. "No harassing Kurenai-neechan."

Naruko's head bobbed to the side.

Kurenai-neechan?

_**Neechan**_!?

Of course, it made sense, but…she just stared at Shinku in disbelief. And with that she completely missed Yugao Uzuki tackling her on the ground.

"Knocking me out like this! You have a lot of nerves to stop me from doing my duty!"

In that moment, Hinata stepped in.

"Stop it! Just because you are madly in love with Shinku-san doesn't mean you can do this! Stop this instant in the name of the Hyuga clan!"

Then she blinked. Sure, she had been a bit late but…

Shinku stared at Hinata.

Then, he stared at Yugao.

Yugao turned her murderous glare on Hinata.

Ready.

Hinata took a step backwards.

Set.

Yugao took one forward.

Go.

And the two dashed away, as a new couple was formed under the name of Good Versus Evil.

"Are all days going to be like this?" Kurenai asked staring at Shinku.

"No…Not many," he replied forcing himself to smile.

"And then they say only shinobi are the mad ones…"

"Hey, I _am_ surrounded by shinobi."

With a sigh, Shinku set back to the kitchen with both Naruko and Sakura following him, this time shoulder-to-shoulder and eying each other darkly.

Joy. Everything wasn't only back to normal…it was even worse than before.

**Author's notes**

**Moment of Yanderism done. Fluff is back. Back Again.**


	73. Storytelling

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Three

Naruko avenged Asuma a week later.

The next day, she received a frying pan to the head. "You. Should. Rest." Shinku hissed dragging the girl back in her bed. "You asked to be discharged from the hospital and nursed at home. I took leave. You don't get to slip away!"

"But Anikiii…" she whined, flailing her casted arm around. "I'm hungry."

"Next time, don't go using a self-destructing technique like that with your right arm. Throw it or something," he growled back.

"I can't throw a Rasengan!" Naruko patted.

"You shouldn't be able to leave the bed for another week," he retorted angrily. "Kurenai-neechan is sleeping in the next room, just keep it quiet."

"Why do you call her neechan?" Naruko asked suddenly, just as Shinku dropped her on the bed.

"She's my sister, right?" he retorted, "You are too."

"You don't call me neechan," Naruko insisted.

"I don't call Sakura that either," Shinku continued. "An appellative hardly matters…are you jealous over something like that?"

"No, I'm not jealous!" Naruko retorted hotly, flinging a pillow at his face with her left hand. "I'm just bored!"

"You're a Chuunin, act like one," Shinku rolled his eyes. "Do you want anything to read?"

"I'm tired of doing nothing but reading," Naruko pouted, grabbing with her left hand the book on her bed desk. "Why can't I train?"

"You can't be tired! You came home just yesterday! And you can't train because you're wounded," he retorted.

"But now I'm healed."

"You still have the cast on," Shinku deadpanned. "And Tsunade-sama told me it would take at least a week."

"Ugh…casts are stupid! How am I supposed to know it's healed if I can't take it off before? And it's scratchy! And then my arm gets all furry and it sucks taking a shower or going to the bathroom…" whining, she slumped the back of her head against the pillow.

"And flipping pages one handed is horrible, plain horrible," she sulked finally. He gave one long look at her 'beaten up' form, and then quietly took the book from her left hand. He flipped it over to read the title, and then coughed before starting to read.

"The tale of the utterly gutsy shinobi began on a clear and crisp morning, with the sun peeking beyond the mountains of his Gutsy Village. The Gutsy shinobi was a boy, whose name will be told in due time. The Shinobi walked towards the Gutsy Kage's tower, to receive a mission. A very important mission indeed, for the Gutsy village was in a dangerous war with the Question Mark village, an enemy shinobi village. Nobody knew who had started the war any longer, but everyone knew or at least believed to be the good guys, avenging their fathers' deaths, who in turn had died avenging their forefathers and so on and on, in a cycle of hatred and malice."

He flipped the page.

"The Kage was an old perverted man, wearing bright white and purple clothes, with green dots. His name was Arutobi, and he clearly was not the Hokage." Shinku snorted. "You! The Kage bellowed pointing at him, "Yes, you! A loud crash echoed in the room, as the window opened loudly in fact, the name of the Gutsy shinobi was drowned out by another shinobi entering the room."

Frowning, Shinku turned another page.

"It was the lascivious but highly klutz Tzu, a flat-chested plank board of a woman. Her eyes were deep pots of honey and amber, and her smile could make a dry desert into a waterfall of love within an instant…" Shinku's eyebrows both rose. "I admit," he said, "That even I, the Author, am in love with her. However, we must progress."

"Old Gutsy Kage! Tzu exclaimed, worry etched in her voice, a trouble lies in the forest! An enemy shinobi is infiltrating the village! Something must be done to stop him!"

"Very well then, go, Gutsy Shinobi, and another loud crash drowned out the Gutsy shinobi's name, go and fight! Fight for the village and kill the Question Mark ninja!"

Shinku huffed as he flipped another page.

"And so the Gutsy shinobi went. He went and dashed way past the Klutz Tzu who still beautifully ran, and he jumped up the highest tree of the Gutsy village, before seeing the enemy far off, at the horizon. And so, even more he ran. He ran and ran, slowly but surely catching up to his enemy, until in the end he caught up to him and thrust his kunai to kill him. But the man dodged, and then bellowed. You cannot stop me, Gutsy Ninja! I will bring the information of your village's defences back to my village, and we will avenge our fathers!"

Shinku brought up his right hand to emphasize the point.

"But if you do that, then our children will fight your own for revenge! The gutsy shinobi replied. Isn't there a way to end this cycle of hatred? Can't you just stop instead of killing? And the Question Mark shinobi replied, with his voice filled with arrogance, Why? You began it! We will finish it! Drown in your own blood, Gutsy shinobi! Drown!"

Shinku flipped the page.

"Never! I am the Utterly Gutsy shinobi, and I will fight you! But then, the question mark shinobi replied, So it is true! And my son will fight and kill yours then! There is no hope for peace! DIE!" Shinku breathed in slowly.

"And so they fought, until in the end it seemed as if the Question mark shinobi had pinned down the Gutsy shinobi, and just as he was about to give the finishing blow however, the Utterly Gutsy shinobi disappeared in smoke, before reappearing on a nearby tree. A large trunk fell then on the head of the Question Mark Shinobi, and the utterly Gutsy Shinobi yelled then, with his chest puffed up high and a beaming smile."

"I am Naruto, the Utterly Gutsy Ninja! I don't know if I'll ever find a way to stop this cycle of hatred, but I will! I swear my life and pledge my soul upon this, for I will stop this war! And so, Naruto began his travels, looking for a way to save the world of ninja from its own violence…" Shinku's voice trailed off, as his eyes then went to Naruko's sleeping form.

"Tired brats should sleep," he chuckled to himself as he closed the book.

Sighing, he made sure the casted arm was on its pillow, before looking once more at the sleeping face of Naruko.

"Sleep well, Naruko," he stood up and then, for some reason he too could not truly understand, bent down to give a light peck on Naruko's forehead. "Nice dreams," he whispered, and then left.

Or at least, he would have. Had a flash of light not appeared in that moment, coming from a camera that was within the hands of Kurenai.

Kurenai smiled angelically.

He suddenly felt extremely cold.

Naruko just began to snore with a stupid smile plastered on her face.

**Author's notes**

**Fluff-Hanger. You know, the place where you hang the Fluff.**


	74. Doing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Four

"So, is everything all right?" Jiraiya appeared one day, in the middle of the afternoon, as he was grading homework in the Academy's faculty office.

"Perverted-Bastard-Jiraiya," Shinku said with a bright smile, "What can I do for you that involve castration?"

"Oh come on kiddo!" Jiraiya exclaimed, "It's been months! Can't you forgive…"

A frying pan soared through the air, catching up in flames before deadly slamming against Jiraiya's face, leaving his features permanently cast into the Stainless Steel Pan.

He fell backwards, and Shinku sighed before returning to the homework he had to correct.

The next instant, the man was back at his side.

"You know, how about going out for dinner on a men only mission?"

"I'm busy, if you haven't understood it yet," Shinku retorted.

"Oh, no need! I already talked with your sister," Jiraiya brightly smiled before gripping him by the shoulders. "And your turn ends right about now, doesn't it?"

"Is this a 'you can't refuse' invitation?"

"IT IS! Smart boy!" the next instant, Shinku felt himself transported through the air and then into an old and dingy Saké shop in a corner of Konoha. Probably in the red light district.

The moment a glorified Bunny Girl hopped by, he knew he was in the red light district and he knew he was going to kill Jiraiya. Even if he had to train, like Rock Lee, and learn how to use the Gates.

"Well, I'll have sake! Five bottles and keep them coming hot!" with that, Jiraiya began to pat his back loudly. "And that's when…"

"What, exactly, is the purpose of this?" Shinku hissed between gritted teeth.

"Well, I'm going off on a mission," Jiraiya remarked. "Into the land of rain. You know, that nice little place where everyone who enters dies or never comes back."

"You're one of the Sannin," Shinku snorted. "You're going to be fine anyway."

"Yes, yes of course," Jiraiya rolled his eyes, "If not for the fact it's the leader of Akatsuki we're talking of that I will end up too close for my tastes."

"Uh?"

"I'll be going to try and take out the head of the snake," he replied grimly. "I might not make it back."

Shinku sighed, closing his eyes. "And why are you telling me this? Shouldn't you be telling Naruko?"

"Nah, Naruko's an adult now, she can take it."

"I can take it very well too, you know," he deadpanned.

"Maybe, but you'll have to take it for her too," Jiraiya smiled brightly. "And I have to make sure you don't take advantage on her weakened state, you 'Aniki'."

A stainless steel frying pan slammed into the back of Jiraiya's head and, as quickly as it appeared, it disappeared in Shinku's sleeves.

"Can you avoid being a pervert at least for a split second?"

"I'm a Super-Pervert! I have to!"

The low growling noise from Shinku's throat made Jiraiya backpedal quickly.

"Anyway, why are you talking as if you'd be going to die? You can always escape, right?"

"Maybe, but in the event I actually do die, I want you to know something else," his voice lowered, and beneath the cover of the smoke filled den and the various yells, he explained the _true_ problem.

"The seal on Naruko is growing weaker by the day. I…I admit I meddled with it during our training, in an effort to make her able to use it and…well, I managed to patch it up but not as well as before."

"You did what?" Shinku's voice was eerily toneless, as he whispered back to the Toad Sage.

"I wanted to give her a boost! So, anyway after that happened I didn't know what else to do and…well," he unwrapped a few dozens of scrolls. "Each of this contains a few hundred of Chakra sealing seals. Apply one to the forehead and she'll be knocked out cold before the problem can get further away. I'm giving half to you, since the other half is in Tsunade's hands already."

"Why?"

"Because we can't possibly know if the news of my death will strike her or not, and even then, it's better to have these available and spread around as much as possible than not."

Shinku swallowed, but accepted the scrolls.

"Now, listen to me kid," Jiraiya added. "Let me tell you this as a man to a man. _You did a great thing_," he whispered. "Very few would have done as much as you did for Naruko, very few. You might never go beyond being a teacher or flinging frying pans, but what you did for her is more than what I, a legendary Sannin, did. So, for all of that…thank you."

Then he left Shinku the tab of sake, before disappearing in the night.

The next day, he left Shinku his entire bank account —with the note to hand it over to Naruko as soon as the girl turned twenty-one.

Staring at the staggering amount of money in his hands, on that little booklet of checks, Shinku trembled slightly. He quietly placed it inside his pocket, zipped it, and decided never to use it and then throw it back at Jiraiya's face when the old perverted bastard came back.

"Ehi, Aniki!" Naruko exclaimed, suddenly appearing from the window and clinging at his neck, making him nearly stumble backwards. "What's for dinner!?"

"Ah…whatever…is fine, I suppose," he replied, before stopping for just a single instant to gaze at Naruko.

Somehow, the image of her being as tall as his knees and looking up at him came up in comparison. She had the same blue eyes of back then of course, but now rather than looking way up at him, she simply brought her head slightly up. She held her face with a semi-permanent grin, like back then.

"Ehi, Aniki?" Naruko frowned, why was her Aniki lost in thoughts now?

"Naruko?" Shinku muttered in the end. "Did I do enough? For you, I mean…"

"Uh? Oh," blinking, Naruko scrunched her face in thought. Was he referring about the Bento food? Had he been worried about that?

"Course you did enough! You know I always eat lots right? And I liked the packed lunch, like, really! I always like your lunches 'ttebayo! And the dinners, also the dinners! What's for dinner anyway?"

She smiled then as Shinku-Aniki merely chuckled, before ruffling her head.

"Glad you do," he said then. "If you let me go, I'll get to the dinner then. Tonight, we'll be doing hamburgers."

"What about Fried meatballs?"

"Fried Meatballs it is then," Shinku shook his head, before grabbing flour, eggs and the hamburger's raw meat. It wasn't difficult to make them once you formed a raw meatball, covered it in egg and flour, and then placed it to cook in a light dosage of oil. They came out fried and cooked deliciously.

"Hurray!" and with that, Naruko scampered off.

Really…it was too easy to make the girl happy. Was he really doing enough?

**Author's notes**

**This fluff gives me the chills.**


	75. Grieving

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Five

He was watering the plants. It wasn't that much of a difficult thing, but he was watering them all the same. Well, he was actually gone way past the watering phase and into the 'drowning' them phase, but there wasn't another choice.

It was that or nearly cutting off his fingers while chopping vegetables.

"Aniki! I'm home!" Naruko yelled, barrelling in from the window.

"Hey," he croaked out, swallowing nervously and then looking sideways. "Welcome home."

Naruko frowned, before slowly walking closer to Shinku who had in the meantime stopped trying to kill the plants.

"Is everything all right, Aniki?"

"How about we go and eat outside? We can bring back take out for Kurenai," he added softly.

"Aniki?"

"Double pork ramen will be fine, I suppose," he began to head towards his jacket. "Come on, Naruko, no use waiting."

She smiled then. Well, maybe it was nothing bad if her Aniki was willing to go and eat outside.

Eat outside and leave Kurenai in the house alone?

Now that made her frown, but…maybe it was some way to get some alone time with her? She blushed slightly at the thought, before shaking her head. Aniki wasn't like that.

He didn't eat anything at the ramen shop though. That made her, Teuchi and Ayame worried.

"Maybe I got the flu bug," he replied with a shaky smile. "Still, it's nothing to worry about."

His voice was incredibly soft, more like a murmur than his actual tone. It scared her. It scared her to death.

"Maybe we should go back home?" Naruko hazarded walking next to Shinku, "When you're sick you should rest, right?"

"Naruko…" they were headed towards the training ground, one of the furthest away from the village. "How was training today?"

"Ah! Kakashi-sensei was a real monster! He and Yamato-Sensei insisted I did double and triple everything! I was so dead tired I thought…"

"I'm sorry. Maybe I shouldn't have forced you to go out…"

"It's not a problem, Aniki," Naruko muttered looking sideways. "But! Why are you so down Aniki? Uh? You look somewhat green, you know? You're not going to die because of the flu right? Ehi? Ehi Aniki! You can't enter the training grounds without looking! There might be someone else training! Ehi…Aniki…why are we here now?"

Around her, there was nothing. Shinku sighed, and then sat down with his legs crossed. She began to fidget.

What was this all about? When her Aniki told her to sit, she hesitated for a moment, before taking the cue and getting down on his lap with a devious smile on her face.

"What is it, Aniki?" she murmured. "Are…" she turned crimson. Wait. She was sitting on his lap, at night, away from everyone else. This…wait…it couldn't be that?

"I'm sorry, Naruko," he began holding her. "But…"

Was he going to…confess? Was that what it was all about?

She…

"Jiraiya died in his last mission."

Like that, her entire body tensed. The night was no longer nice, but cold. The…

"Ero-sannin?"

"He fought off against Pain, but in the end…" Naruko began to squirm.

"Let me go! It's…Let me go Aniki!"

"Stand still!" he snapped back at her, tightening his hold. He knew that it would take relatively little for even a Genin to escape his grasp, which was why he had chosen to sit down.

"No! NO! Come on! This is a joke! A really horrible joke! This isn't real, right? He's like, the Sannin! He's strong! He's…not him too please," her voice cracked as tears began to fall down her face. "Please…not him too," her face lowered against his chest. "Not him too…"

He gritted his teeth, hugging her tightly.

It was going to be all right. There was not going to be a Kyuubi escape and he knew there were like, five or six Jounin hidden in the trees ready at a moment's notice.

Still, all that Naruko did was to cry and wail louder with each passing moment. He gently began to pat her head, softly whispering.

"It's going to be all right."

"He's dead! He's not all right! He's…he was a stupid pervert, he wasn't supposed to…" the sniffles grew louder, but the wails did subside. "I…"

He held her close and sighed, closing his eyes. "I'm going to kill Pain," Naruko said suddenly.

"Naruko?"

"I'm going to kill Pain. I'm going to make him suffer. I'm going to tear him apart and watch as he bleeds to death for what he did. I'm going to kill all those of the Akatsuki and then, when I'm done, I'm going to spit on their graves and watch as…"

"Naruko!" he opened his eyes to stare in crimson ones, as Naruko's frame felt scorching hot to the touch. He could feel his palms sizzling from simply holding her close. "Naruko, calm down!"

"Why?" she snarled, "They keep taking people away from me! They're a danger to my precious people! I won't let them! I won't!" shaking her head, she clenched tightly on his back with her nails. "I'm not letting them take anyone else! I'm not!"

"Naruko…calm…down…you're hurting me," he croaked out.

"Uh?" and like that, crimson left the place to cerulean. When Naruko moved her hands away from Shinku's back, it was to stare at the nails dirtied with blood and scraps of flesh.

"Ah…Ah…" Naruko began to breathe in and out deeply, scared.

"It's fine," Shinku exhaled, gently butting his forehead against hers. "It's fine. Everything's fine."

"But…but…"

"This is nothing."

"But I…But…"

"This. Is. Nothing."

Then he smiled. "Do you think that perverted bastard would want you to swear revenge in his name? Didn't he write a book about letting go of it?"

"I…I don't know."

Her head fell down against his shoulder then, and soon the peaceful snoring of her tired form reached his ears. She had fallen asleep. Sighing, he slowly wobbled back to his feet while holding her. "Well," he grumbled. "Time to go back home."

And back home he walked, with blood dribbles dripping down his back and his hands scorched.

Still, it didn't matter much because at the very least, in that precise moment, he could claim he had done enough.

And that was all that mattered.

**Author's notes**

**Someone's going to dieeeee.**


	76. Fanservicing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Six

Jiraiya's funeral was a quiet affair.

Few people remained who knew the sage personally, but the newspapers and his fan cried all the same for the death of one of the most prolific porn-writers ever to exist.

So they cried not for the death of Jiraiya, the pervert-sage, but for the death of the author of books such as "Icha-Icha Makeout Tactics" and "Icha-Icha Ultimate Porn Collection."

The people assembled in wide groups in the libraries, narrating their favourite lines aloud and crying as they spoke of perky breasts and creamy thighs. Many children had to go through the roads with their ears covered by their scandalized mothers, while their fathers cried on, their hands on their chest in remembrance of one of the best porn authors ever to exist.

It was a sad day for porn.

Naruko had absent-mindedly clasped on to Shinku's hand during the funeral. She had held on to it as a lifeline, and hadn't let go even as the funeral ended. Her eyes watery and her gaze downcast, she probably would have fallen on the ground hadn't Shinku been looking out for potential 'dangers' on the road.

"The old hag wants me to become a toad sage," she said suddenly, as they reached the park midway through their trek back home from the cemetery. "I have to go and train on that mount 'something' of the toads soon enough," she muttered.

"Well…" and then, suddenly, something clicked. He was going to regret it, but… "Ehi, you remember three years ago?"

"Uh?"

"I made you a promise I didn't keep," he stated plainly.

"What?"

"I promised I'd take you to the mixed hot springs, and wash your back," he added then thoughtfully. Naruko's hand began to sweat as she turned red, purple and then scarlet.

"Ah…Ehm…Aniki…there's…"

"And now that I think about it, I never did bring you to hot springs, did I?"

He began to walk once more towards home. "Well, the day is young, you might have to depart tomorrow, and I'm not going to let the matter sit." He just had to think of it as washing Sakura's squirming three years old body. It worked on the same principle.

"But I'm clean!" Naruko meekly exclaimed, "I don't need the…"

"It will help you relax, I'm sure. A day at the hot springs is like…well, it's fanservice. Like when you watch a cartoon where there's an episode at the beach because of the skimpy swimsuits. There's also the hot springs."

"Ah…I…" and there went her counter-argument.

It wasn't difficult to pack a swimsuit nor was it difficult to reach the hot springs. The changing room for mixed bathing also had the bath area to begin with, so all that it took was simply Shinku to raise an eyebrow and nod towards the now completely trembling in shame Naruko.

For once, it actually felt somewhat nice being on the 'delivering' end of embarrassment.

Naruko sat down on the stool with only her swimsuit and her towel, while he merely walked behind her readying the soap and the brush.

"Ah…Aniki? Be gentle, please?"

She meekly whispered that, before biting her lip.

Outside the complex, Sakura's nose had lost all her blood as she laid in a twitching form on the ground.

'Be Gentle' was just THE catchphrase. As her body twitched, Hinata just looked to her limp body from her own position and then dreamily sighed. "Make her squirm, Aniki-san, make her squirm," her face turned red. "A squirming Naruko…eheh…ah…ohhh…" blood sprayed out of her nose for the mental images, and she too fell limp next to Sakura.

Back in the hot springs, Naruko held her eyes closed as she felt the brush pass over her back. She hummed, or at least tried to. She was supposed to be enjoying this, right? Well, she was but not in the _sense_, the sense she had hoped for. Maybe she really was too old for having her back washed?

She squirmed and fidgeted, her mouth letting out a gasp and then her throat a light moan.

"A…Anikiii…" she whined.

Shinku, meanwhile, was imagining Sakura in her three-years-old self, squirming around and giggling madly.

"Stand still," he said off-handed, scrubbing harder.

"You're turning me raw," she moaned aloud, just a second before the door of the mixed bathing opened.

"No one turns anyone else raw!" then the figure disappeared the next instant closing the door behind her.

Shinku blinked. He could have sworn he had seen his Anbu guard for an instant. Then again, he was surprised the woman hadn't entered to begin with. These were mixed baths, weren't they?

Then it was Naruko's turn to reciprocate. She halted there, and Shinku could feel her fingers trace the lines of where she had wounded him with her nails. That would probably scar, but it wasn't a mortal danger of sorts.

"I'm sorry," she muttered. "I…"

"It's not your fault," Shinku exhaled back. "And I'm made of tough stuff. A few nail marks on my back won't harm anyone—"

A few eavesdroppers turned to one another, before giving nods of understanding. 'Be Gentle', 'Turn her raw' and 'Nail marks on my back' were clearly signs of one simple action.

They just had to inform Ibiki, and then their job was done.

Meanwhile Kakashi slowly began to jolt down notes for his own book, which in the vacuum of loss of Jiraiya would probably see the light of the day. He'd entitle it: 'Icha-Icha Mixed Bath Action'.

He was sure it would sell millions!

When Naruko was done washing his back, Shinku commented then.

"Well then, now that we've washed each other's backs, I say we can take to the bath right?"

"Ah-han," Naruko stammered out. She was in her swimsuit so really, why was she worried about it? Her Aniki had his, so there was nothing to worry about.

Nothing. Her stupid brain just had to quiet down and…

She slipped into the water and remained there, watching as her Aniki did pretty much the same. Slowly, she scuttled closer to him. Slowly, ever so slowly, while humming that theme of that shark-film which was very scary in her opinion and had her swear off the ocean forever and ever.

_Then Shinku-Aniki grabbed her chin with two of his fingers, and smiled at her brightly._

"_Naruko," he whispered with his smile twinkling and shining through his perfect white teeth. "I can't hold up any longer…"_

"_Ah…what is it, Aniki?" she bubbled out turning completely crimson._

"_I love you."_

_She fainted._

Shinku, meanwhile, watched from his spot as Naruko held on a sleazy half-mad laughter due to the heat of the bath. Groaning, he rolled his eyes and swam closer to the girl before she decided to drown in the hot springs.

"Really," he muttered, lifting her out of the bath. "It's the second time in two days that I end up carrying you, Naruko," he grumbled. "What is it, wife-carrying training?"

To that sarcastic quip, Naruko just replied with a half-drunk giggle of her own.

"I…love yah…aniki…"

"Yeah, yeah, I love you too…" he grumbled, "Brat."

The next day, Naruko left for the Toad Mountain without saying a word of goodbye.

He sighed and went to work as always. The way people were looking at him however…what was going on and why, exactly, were the Hyuga making curse-gestures in _his_ direction?

The answer came under the form of an excerpt, written upon one of the most scandalous magazines of Konoha, that he so casually read as he strolled by towards the Academy.

_Dirty things happen in the bushes! Hyuga heiress found doing kinky blood plays with pink-haired girl! Does true love know no kink?_

He decided to do as he always did when something that went beyond logic attacked his brain.

He ignored the thing completely and went on.

**Author's notes**

**It's the final countdown…**


	77. Finishing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Seven

It was a normal day. The sun shone its rays down on Konoha, as the city bustled in its normalcy. Naruko had gone training with the toads and had yet to return, but in the meantime, everything was fine.

Shinku walked through the market, humming to himself. He wondered what would make for a good dinner, and if he'd end up having guests —like Shikamaru and his team, who popped up every now and then to check on Kurenai.

It was as he was thinking about random, normal things…that the building nearby exploded and a giant crawling 'thing' emerged clicking dangerously. There was a moment of quiet contemplation. The shock lingered for the second it took the beast actually to start rampaging, before the screams gave way to a massive wave of terror.

People began to run.

Some ran faster, others stumbled and fell. A few grabbed on to their children and hoisted them up. Generally, it was carnage when the thing decided to charge further down the road, cleaving and mincing apart the people.

A building crumbled nearby, and he barely fell down to avoid the brunt of its rubble from falling over his head.

He tried to pull himself away, but his limb did not answer him.

His right leg smashed beneath a piece of the building, his eyes widened in realization as he watched with shock a three-headed dog mowing through the houses.

He was going to die.

It was as simple as that.

He was going to die there, because the village was under attack.

There was nothing he could do, nothing he could do to help.

A flicker materialized a moment later —a moment too late— in the form of his Anbu guard.

"Can you…"

"Eh," he muttered with a bitter smile. "Nice guard you are," he snarled out as he could feel the agony of the crushed limb start to flare up, as the adrenaline waned.

"I'll get you out…"

"Leave me be," he muttered back. "Go and get someone else to safety. I'm stuck here. You'd have to amputate the leg and I'd die of blood loss before you can get me to the hospital —if a hospital remains, that is."

"I have orders," Yugao replied.

"And I'm telling you to go," he retorted. "Come on now, before I start ranting out. Just…go and save someone else. I'll be fine if I stay still, really…" he croaked that out. "Just go for the love of god!"

"Fine," and with that, Yugao flickered away. He gritted his teeth and hissed in pain, before taking in deep breaths. He was in a corner of the market. The buildings that could fall had already done so. If the battle ended and someone came afterwards…but who'd attack the village to begin with?

That was his last thought, before he felt a massive wave of energy literally slam through the very air.

He closed his eyes.

The building he was beneath was lifted in the air together with him, and the next instant he felt a sharp pain in his back as his body collided with that of Sakura who held him.

"I've got you, Onii-sama!" she stated plainly, before flickering away from the village and on a nearby hill where many of the evacuee had ended up going.

"Now stay still," Sakura snapped. "Really…staying behind like an idiot," she growled. "You're lucky Hinata kept an eye out for you in particular, that's what," with that, her hands glowed green as she began to treat his leg. "I'll just stop the bleeding for now. Have to conserve my chakra for the other wounded but…" she bit her lips, "What were you thinking, uh? If you have to live without a leg, then it's fine as long as you get to live! Really! It's just a leg!"

"I…Ah…"

"I'll let it be for now," Sakura grumbled turning her head to the crater that now substituted Konoha. "I'm sure Naruko will have a word with you too afterwards."

Shinku exhaled.

Naruko returned atop Gamabunta, her bright red mantle flapping in the wind. Her eyes were golden and as she felt the living all around her, she was glad her Aniki was safely away on a nearby hill.

Then she began to battle.

She exchanged blows with Pain. She fought off his bodies, snarled at him, attacked him with everything she had and, in the end, she felt herself stabbed repeatedly and pulled down on the ground.

"This appears to be your end, Naruko Uzumaki," Pain stated plainly.

"AH…No! Not a chance in hell, you bastard!" she growled, trying to pull her hands free.

"I will be syphoning your chakra off," Pain replied. "You truly cannot hope to stop a God, can you?"

"No…I…I will. You can be sure on it dattebayo!"

Hinata appeared the next moment in front of her.

"Why do you so pointlessly struggle?" Pain asked without even bothering. "You're going to lose. You have no hope to—"

Naruko felt one of the metal rods come loose from her hand. Her eyes widened as she saw the familiar look of black hair and red eyes stare back at her.

"Ehi," he mouthed, making the 'shh' sound. "They don't react if you don't have chakra," he pointed at the rods.

He was doing an extremely stupid thing.

It made sense in theory though.

Hinata distracted the man and he removed the rods.

It wasn't difficult. He ground his teeth as he managed to remove one, before the drowned out gasp emerged from Naruko's throat forced him to turn around.

Hinata was knocked unconscious on the ground and…Pain's eyes now, for the first time, settled on him.

Shinku swallowed nervously.

Pain gazed, and then brought up his left hand.

The rod in Shinku's hand floated out of his grasp a moment later and then, with a single fluid motion, pierced straight through his chest and stabbed at his heart.

His eyes widened in fear as his breathing grew ragged.

"ANIKI! ANI…"

He fell to the side. He could hear the blood gushing out of his wound in his ears. He could hear his breathing loud and gurgling. Does a pierced heart still beat?

Then he smiled as he felt his life come less. It was supposed to be some sort of scary thing, dying. Yet as he watched Naruko manage with her freed hand to free herself and rush to his side, he couldn't help but smile at the thought that he had helped somewhat.

"ANIKI! ANIKI!" she was yelling at him, rather than looking out for Pain who remained quiet, watching the scene.

"ANIKI PLEASE! YOU PROMISED! YOU SWORE! STAY WITH ME! STAY WITH…" he closed his eyes.

Naruko's hands grabbed tightly on Shinku's cheeks. "Please wake up!" she pleaded. "I'll go without ramen. I'll go without everything as long as you wake up! Please, I'll do anything as long as you wake up. You can't be dead. You promised you'd never die or leave me alone! You promised! You're meant to keep your promises!" she croaked out. "Please don't die…"

"Pain is inevitable," Pain said next. "Was he a friend? Was he your brother? Was he your family? He died because you did not surrender."

"Shut up."

"You could have followed willingly, Naruko Uzumaki. His death is meaningless."

"Shut. Up."

"Do you feel this pain? This pain is the same as what everyone else feels when they lose someone they cherish. Konoha never learned this lesson until now. How does it feel, Naruko Uzumaki?"

"SHUT UP!" she yelled back at him. "HE DID NOTHING WRONG! He wasn't even a shinobi! He never went on a mission, never killed anyone, and he never did anything to you! SHUT. UP! You're nothing more than a murderer!"

Naruko gritted her teeth hard. "And I want to kill you so bad right now, I want to slaughter you, I want to butcher you…I want to tear apart your very body and make you suffer for this…I want to. I need to…" her body washed in crimson chakra. "_**AND I SWEAR I WILL!**_"

Shinku blinked.

"Is this what it means to be dead?" he hazarded, looking around. There was blackness all around him.

"This is just the go-between," another voice, gruff, remarked. He turned around in time to gaze at another pair of crimson eyes and dark hair, before he barrelled into it and hugged the man tightly.

"Father!"

"Urgh," Shinku's father grumbled, before grabbing a hold of his shoulders and gently peeling Shinku off. "Be more of a man, Shinku. For the love of god, you're no longer seven!"

"Sorry," Shinku muttered sheepishly. "So…where's mother?"

"She's further down, but you'll see her in due time," he acquiesced. "And now's not the time."

"Uh? But, I'm dead right?"

"Yes," his father replied. "But not for long."

"I'm pretty sure once you're dead you can't go back," Shinku deadpanned.

"Well, generally it's like that. Sometimes it isn't though…which is why you're going back."

"Ah…I'm going back?" he retorted calmly. "Really?"

"Yes, albeit Joe isn't happy when dead people come back from the dead, but apparently that's just the way it goes."

Shinku nodded, and then firmly flung a punch at his father's face.

"This is for leaving me and Kurenai-neechan alone," he replied bitterly. "Do you have any idea what we went through? Do you!?"

"Shinku, listen…I did what had to be done for the good of the village."

"You should have done it better then! You shouldn't have died! Or you should have died with the 'return home' option!"

"Now that's a low blow! I was thinking about you both when I went to hold off the Kyuubi!"

"You couldn't even graze him! Nothing you did was meaningful!" tears came out of Shinku's eyes, "You shouldn't have even bothered trying! You'd still be alive then!"

"And what sort of man would I be then? Spending day after day asking myself if I had done enough? I saved a scared kid from the rubble before going to fight the Kyuubi. Hadn't I gone, he'd be dead now wouldn't he? I did what had to be done."

"It's still damn unfair," Shinku muttered back, collapsing on the ground and exhaling. "Damn unfair."

"Life's unfair," his father stated plainly, sitting down next to him. "You just have to live with it."

"Truer words were never spoken," Shinku grumbled back. "Damn…"

"What?"

"Am I going to remember anything of this when I go back?"

"Course not."

"Then, can I ask you something?"

"Ask away…"

"What is the meaning of life?"

His father smiled, and then replied.

"It's Porn!"

"Porn?"

"Porn!"

"I hate you, dad. Just you wait till I tell mother."

"You wound me so much, Shinku! So, so much," and with those words Shinku's father disappeared into thin mist as everything around him returned to a lighter shade of black.

He felt the ground beneath his body.

He felt the air on his skin.

And then, calmly, he opened his eyes.

The sky was blue.

The clouds were white.

And everything, everything…seemed fine.

"Ouch," he groaned as he gingerly touched where the rod had pierced is heart. The skin was still tender, but perfectly healed.

That lasted until he heard a sharp cry of joy from a crowd, which was soon overshadowed by the running of footsteps and the slamming against his sitting form of a blond bullet that shoved him once more back on the ground —and actually dug a sort of trench a good meter long.

Two arms tightly grabbed him by the neck.

A body pressed against his and as he finally put into view the accusing object, lips smashed.

"UGH! Guf…" then, he looked at the accusing object with a sense of finality and sighed.

And he kissed her back.

**Author's notes**

**Next Chapter, the Epilogue.**

**Yes, I'm ending this story in the next chapter.**

**I know it might feel somewhat hasty (But this chapter is 2K) but September is coming, time's running short, and this story has been a great joyous ride.**

**I'm going to give you guys a chance since I did not specify who kisses who.**

**As with all Harem-Like-Animes, in the end only one wins.**

_**Take your pick**_**.**


	78. Epiloguing

The Boy in the Park

Chapter Seventy-Eight

"You can't make Ramen-day a national day, Hokage-sama," Sakura huffed in displeasure, turning to smithereens a parchment with the proposed law. "And no, you can't increase the academy teachers' salary just because you want to."

Naruko pouted.

Sure, she was way over the time when pouting was something natural to her, but she still pouted all the same.

"Come on, Sakura-chan," she pleaded her, "I've got some pictures here…"

"Shower?" Sakura asked, raising an eyebrow.

"And bath," Naruko nodded sagely.

"_**Gimme**_," with that Sakura pounced, as Naruko jumped backwards throwing the pictures in the air for Sakura to swiftly grab. Then, the pink-haired girl began to giggle as blood dribbled down her nose. "He's so _cute_, oh, look at him…yes little cutey, who's a little cutey? You are! Oh can I come over tonight for dinner? Eh?"

"Ah…" Naruko sweat-dropped, "How about tomorrow?"

"Yosh! He'll be my ticket out of haghood!"

Naruko exhaled. "Really? You have to say that in front of the mother? Can't you be any more shameless, Sakura?"

"But he's so cute! Look at him, with Onii-sama's eyes! He's going to be a lady killer when he grows up, which is why auntie Sakura is going to make sure he doesn't stray into a bad and perverted path, because we can't trust your mother can we little one? Eh? No we can't!"

"Ohi," a nervous tick mark appeared on Naruko's forehead. "You telling me I'm a bad mother, you flat-chested plank board?"

"Being in the same team as Sai corrupted her, little cutey," Sakura continued, ignoring her. "But don't worry, I wasn't corrupted by that pale vampire-like wimp, so giggly-giggly goo…"

"Giggly….giggly?"

"Well, giggity-giggity sounds wrong with something as cute as this little one! Oh, look at…"

The pictures disappeared a moment later in a flash as Naruko hugged them closer to her chest. "I changed my mind! Sakura! You promised to take your medications!"

"But I did," Sakura whined. "Come on! Give me those pictures!"

"Not a chance in hell!"

Naruko flashed away, leaving behind a pouting Sakura.

The girl slumped down on the ground. "No…sniff, sniff, my little cutey! Give him back!"

Two Hiraishin jumps later —to hell with whomever said she couldn't learn her father's technique— she ended up with her legs dangling from the nearest rooftop.

"Hokage-sama," Yugao commented quietly. "Everything is clear."

"Do you have the report?" Naruko asked then calmly.

"Hokage-sama, you realize this is both highly unethical and at the same time hypocrite?"

"I assigned you to guard a key target for Konoha's wellbeing Anbu Cat, so I want to know the names of those who might pose a problem."

"Which would be fine if you weren't asking me if there's some Academy student crushing on him," Yugao exhaled. "Really, Hokage-sama, with all due respect…"

"The. List?"

"No one," she retorted. "No Academy Student."

"Good," she nodded, "And let's keep it that way, shall we?"

Then she jumped off the rooftop and walked straight inside the classroom, passing by the door.

A _rubber_ frying pan neatly connected with her face.

"Muuuuhhhh! I was just visiting, Hubby!" Naruko whined, removing the frying pan.

"Teaching in progress," Shinku remarked calmly. "And I'm not going to hear the parents association once again because you had the fathers give the 'talk' early."

Naruko whined some more, before turning to look at the wide-eyed students sitting there and staring at her —well, she was the awesomest Hokage ever, even if 'awesomest' wasn't a word.

"You're so cruel," Naruko sniffled, "So, so cruel. What am I supposed to do without my recharge of Hubby-love?"

"Maybe do your Hokage work?" Shinku hazarded back with a smile on his lips. "Come on," he continued, "You've got your work and I've got mine to do."

Naruko flickered, before reappearing quite close and grabbing him by the jacket's neck hem. She roughly kissed him on the lips for a moment, which soon became a minute, before releasing him and taking a small jump back. "Teeheehee," she said with a smile.

"I doubt 'tee-hee-hee' is a word."

"See you later, Hubby!"

And with that she flashed away.

Shinku turned to his class and coughed once, politely. "Remember kids, if your parents ask, boys are yucky and girls give cooties."

"Understood, sensei," one of the oldest boys in the class remarked, while carefully hiding his _Icha-Icha Porn-Porn Student_ written by Kakashi-Sensei, who was the new hit porn author.

"Sensei, what are cooties?" a girl asked curiously.

"It's what kids your age believed in years ago," Shinku grumbled. "Years before someone had the brilliant idea of making an _Icha-Icha Sex Education_ for kids," with that, he sent a nice growling curse towards Kakashi.

The silver haired man in question was taking tea with Ibiki.

"So, let me get this straight," Kakashi remarked. "You're looking for someone to have kids with Anko, and you chose me."

"Gai is out of the question, and I want grandchildren," Ibiki remarked. "Also, the Hokage particularly stressed your need to find someone and after using me as an assistant, we came up with this perfect solution. Anko will not harass Shinku, and you will not pervert him any longer if you have someone as kinky as you to keep you at bay."

"I'm going to voice my complaints vocally to the Hokage for abuse of power," Kakashi deadpanned.

"Oh, don't worry," Ibiki smiled. "We have all the time in the world to make you change your idea."

Kakashi felt drowsy.

"You…laced…the…tea."

"It always works," Ibiki nodded sagely.

Hinata on the other hand was calmly exchanging sake with her branch members.

She had a flowery tattoo on her right arm —that was water-removed— and held a firm gaze as the exchanges finished. She was slightly tipsy by the end of it, but still…

"So, hic," she muttered. "We drink to our broken hearts…"

"Sniff…the boss is so kind-hearted!" a few Hyuga branch members began to cry rivers.

"She's so compassionate."

"Which is why…we'll hic…take care," Hinata giggled, "to make sure…hic…there are more Shinkus for everyone next time!"

"Boss?"

"Stock on fertility pills! Hic! I'll have the next generation filled with Shinku babies so…hic, everyone will have a chance!"

"Isn't that a bit on the paedophilia side of the force?" a Hyuga branch member whispered to another.

"Meowth," mister Fluff took that moment to walk and then sit on Hinata's lap.

"And then…and then I'll have Hanabi-chan be the teacher of one of those Shinku-child teams!"

"Onee-sama is the best sister ever," Hanabi bellowed from her spot, drunk as much as her older sister, "And…hic!"

Hiashi decided that no, he was not going to enter that conversation.

"Neji?"

"Hai, Hiashi-sama?"

"Reinforce the numbers of the castration squad. We will need new members for the following years…" that said, he looked out of the window of his office, a pipe in his hand. "Castration is coming…" a cold winter breeze ruffled his hair. "And we must be ready!"

"Yes, Hiashi-sama!"

Ayame happily stirred the ramen broth, eying the Hokage's downtrodden expression. "Now, now Naruko-chan, what's the matter?"

"Sniffle…you think I'm too grabby?"

"Why? Something happened?"

"Hubby flung a frying pan at me…"

"Isn't that domestic violence?" Ayame retorted, frowning.

"Ah, no! It was one of those rubber ones he uses in class!" she hastily added, flailing her hands around, "I interrupted his lesson."

"Isn't that something you do every, single, day?" Ayame replied. "Like running away from paperwork?"

"I have Kage Bunshin to do paperwork!" Naruko retorted indignantly. "I'm free! As always! I don't understand why people said it would be a hassle to become Hokage! I've got the entire day free, I can do whatever and…sniffle, Hubby's busy teaching."

"Maybe you need a hobby?" Ayame tried again.

"I need more Hubby-Energy, that's what," Naruko pitifully whined.

"What about your little rascal instead?"

"He thinks mommy's hugs are yucky!" she began to cry rivers, "And Hubby said if I kidnap him again from the kindergarten he'll stop making ramen at home!"

"Aw, poor Naruko-chan," Ayame said shaking her head lightly. "That's cruel…and I'm not saying it because you're one of my favourite customers."

"Thanks Ayame-chan," Naruko muttered back, wiping away her tears. "Well! Better get going then! It's lunch break at the academy!"

With those words, Naruko grabbed her own Pork ramen from the ramen stall and flashed out —why walk when you can Hiraishin?

Five seconds later, and she carefully looked around the Academy's courtyard.

Then her smile faltered a bit when she realized her Hubby's class wasn't present.

"Oh, Hokage-sama?" Iruka-sensei said then, "Shinku's class went to the park."

"Thanks, Iruka-sensei!" she flashed away a moment later, and then reappeared on one of the park's trees —where she had so conveniently left a kunai for the Hiraishin.

She had literally covered the entire Konoha in Hiraishin seals to begin with, so it wasn't much of a problem flashing from one side to the other.

Naruko's eyes settled on Shinku's form, the man she loved, and who currently was ignoring everything around him as he read. The kids were playing around without a worry, and she carefully crept forward humming her own tune.

"Hey, mistah," she began with a twinkle in her eyes. "What'cha reading?"

"Chapter twelve: Of the Chrysanthemum family," he remarked with his lips twitching in a smile, before closing the book. Naruko, in her mature and womanly self of twenty-eight years, sat down on Shinku's lap without a care in the world.

"Uff, you're getting heavy you know that?" he chuckled, only to receive a fist on the head for once.

"You don't tell your wife she's fat!" Naruko deadpanned back. "You don't tell any woman she's fat to begin with!"

"Ah," his arms circled around Naruko's waist. "Really?"

"Yep," she nodded firmly. "You usually tell them how pretty they are and how slim they are," she added then.

"You're trying to ignore the elephant in the house," Shinku deadpanned. "Ramen for lunch, _again_? I gave you a Bento, didn't I?"

"Ate it along the way to the office."

"You're shameless," Shinku exhaled, his forehead bumping lightly against hers, "Really shameless."

"Oh, by the way," Naruko smiled, "Guess what I've been reading recently?"

"Ramen and how to make it?" Shinku hazarded.

"Nope," she shook her head. "Something better."

"Something better than Ramen?" he cocked his head to the side. "What, exactly, is better than Ramen in your opinion?"

"A way to keep by Hubby-battery charged!" she nodded vividly, before taking out a book that read.

"_Teaching for Dummies."_

Shinku blinked.

"You understand they won't let the Hokage become a teacher."

"Yeah, well, you know how Nazuma-sensei never actually was removed from the roster?" Naruko blinked rapidly, fluttering her eyelids.

"You didn't."

"I did," she nodded firmly. "Being Hokage is great!"

"The most Power-Abusive Hokage ever in the history of Konoha," Shinku sighed, shaking his head. "How am I going to tell this to my wife then? What is she going to do when she hears my first love is back in town?"

"Ohi," Naruko's forehead sported a tick mark. "You want to have something broken, mister?"

She waved her fist up in the air, only for Shinku to grab on it and press her closer. "You're so cute when you go on a tantrum," he whispered.

"Ehiii! That's not fair," she blushed. "You can't call me cute! I'm twenty-eight! Cute was, like, years ago!"

"Uhm…nope, still cute," he nodded sagely before gently grabbing her chin. "But if you want, I can add another thing to it."

"Ah…uhm?"

"Beautiful."

Then he kissed her, just as he had done years before.

Everything was fine in the world.

He wasn't a shinobi, and he wasn't anything more than an Academy teacher, but he had done more than enough…for being The Boy in the Park.

_**The End.**_

**Author's notes**

**And it's done.**

**You have the feels? I do.**

**It's done.**

**End.**

**Hereby, the Author would like to thank all the readers. Those who read but the few chapters, those who read them all, those who laughed and those who didn't, but, in any case…**

_**Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed the ride as much as I enjoyed the writing.**_

**Ps:**

**Now it's totally time to get back to angst writing.**


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